by Lynne Silver
She may have nodded or not, but he took her compliance as a yes. Somehow he found the strength to get to his feet and help her to hers. Together they shuffled into his bedroom and collapsed on the bed.
“Give me a few minutes”—Jason’s voice was muffled as his face was buried in a pillow—“then we’re going again.” His arm was flung over her chest. She lay on her back and looked at the ceiling. Five seconds ago, she was practically dead to the world. Now her brain was alive and buzzing with post-coital haze. A few minutes? She could handle it. She had six years of abstinence to compensate for.
It was a world apart from her previous sex life. At eighteen when she’d met Andy, as a virginal college freshman, the sex had been great. Though she’d had nothing to compare it to. What she had with Jason was incomparable, but letting down the emotional barriers she’d erected as self-preservation was difficult. She was starting to trust Jason, but how could she know that Jason wouldn’t take one look at her legs and run the other way? It was what Andy had eventually done.
“Hey.” Jason looked over and grabbed her attention. “Where are you going?”
She rolled her neck to look at him. They lay nose to nose, her on her back, him on his stomach. “What do you mean? I’m not going anywhere. I’m yours for tonight.”
“I meant where’d your head go? You were with me, then suddenly not.”
She leaned in to kiss him. “I’m sorry. It’s been a little crazy. Last week I was a happy single gal; now I’m having a wild affair with a firefighter. It’s not like me.”
He pushed himself onto an elbow and looked down at her. “Stop analyzing. You asked me to be your stud, and I provide a full service business.”
She laughed, but he suddenly looked very serious. “But just so we’re clear, I don’t want to be your go-to guy for sex. I want to be your guy. Period.”
Her heart melted a little, and the barriers lowered a fraction as she reached to tug him down on top of her and get more of his delicious kisses. When they pulled back a little, she said, “I’m still a little scared. Sex complicates everything. The lines between us are now blurred.”
“I would advise you not to think about it too much. Go with what feels right, what feels good.”
She shifted under him and cradled his hips between her thighs. “This feels good,” she said seductively. “Should I go with this?”
He groaned. “Yes, you should definitely go with this.”
Chapter Eleven
The glow stayed with her all week. She and Jason continued to text, meet for lunches or dinners, but managed to spend only one night together. He’d taken on some extra shifts as a flu debilitated half the staff at his station. Her face actually hurt from smiling so much. She even blew off work to take a real lunch hour on Wednesday and met Ari for lunch.
“You’re walking funny,” Ari said as soon as she slung her coat over the back of her chair and sat down.
“What?” Her mouth dropped open a bit, not sure if she’d heard her best friend correctly.
“I said you’re walking funny. Good sex can do that, you know.” Ari calmly studied her menu.
She didn’t need a mirror to know her cheeks were scarlet. “Shut up. We’re in public.”
Ari laughed at her over the menu. “Stop freaking out. No one’s paying attention, and if they heard, they’d be jealous. Heck, I’m jealous.”
“You are?” Her menu remained ignored on the table for now. “What happened to Mr. Dreadlock? The artist.”
Ari shrugged. “He was a pretentious jerk. I was able to ignore it for a little while ’cause he was an inventive lover, but it got tiresome. What about Mr. Firefighter?”
“What about him?”
“Is he an inventive lover?”
She picked up her menu and hid behind it. There was no need. Ari knew her too well, and her face gave it away. They both started laughing.
“You like him,” Ari observed.
“What makes you say that?”
Ari kept talking as a server came over to pour ice water in their glasses. “I can tell because you’re not willing to share about your sex life.”
She glanced up at the waiter, who kept an impassive expression. She waited until the waiter was gone before answering. “When have I ever been willing to share about my sex life or lack of?”
“True, but you told me Jason was a fling. You should be willing to talk if he’s simply a fling. The fact that you’re blushing tells me it’s more.”
“It’s only supposed to be a fling,” she protested. “But I think it’s morphing into so much more.”
Ari sat up straighter and put the menu carefully next to her plate. “I’ll give the fling test.”
“The what?”
“Arianna’s How to tell if it’s a relationship or a fling test. Patent pending.”
Val laughed. “Okay. Shoot.”
“Have you spent the night at his place?” Ari asked, looking all business.
“Yes. But only because I’m currently staying with my parents.”
“Do you eat meals together?”
She bit the inside of her cheek before answering. “I’m supposed to go to his place tonight so we can cook dinner together. The weather’s so rainy today, it’ll be nice to stay in.”
“Uh-huh,” Ari said slowly, failing to hide a smile. “Has he called, texted, or e-mailed you yet today?”
“Well, he had to. He was at the supermarket and wanted to confirm ingredients.”
“Survey says: Relationship! It’s more than a fling.”
Before Valerie could protest and deny, deny, deny, their waiter returned to take their order. She hadn’t even had a chance to read the menu. “I’ll have a salad,” she told the waiter.
“The grilled chicken salad?”
“Yes, that one.” She handed the menu to the waiter after confirming she wanted the Italian vinaigrette on the side, and then she looked intently at Ari. “I like him, but don’t make more of this than it is. We’ve been together just over two weeks. He’s only with me because I told him I wanted sex. What man is going to turn down hot sex with no strings? But he keeps pushing for more. He says he wants to be my guy. What is wrong with him? He’s not supposed to be this perfect.”
“Val, you are delusional.”
She nearly tipped her water over. “I am not.”
Ari smiled slyly across the table. “You finally met a man who knocks your socks off, so don’t question it. Enjoy it. And stop worrying about what to label the relationship. Live in the moment.”
“You think?”
“Yeah, I do. Speaking of knocking off socks? Have you told him about the fire yet?”
“No.” She pressed her palm down on the tablecloth in front of Ari’s place setting. “But I’m going to. Very soon. Tonight maybe.”
“Good girl,” was Ari’s only comment.
“Like I said. He’s too perfect. What if he shows his true colors when I show him mine?”
“Then good riddance.”
After that they changed the subject and chatted easily about a variety of topics until they’d hugged good-bye and gone their separate ways. However, the conversation kept replaying in Valerie’s mind as she returned to her office for the afternoon. Val appreciated Ari’s discretion. She knew the time had come to tell Jason and to reveal herself figuratively and literally, but it was terrifying. Everything was great between them. She didn’t want his sympathy or his disgust.
It gave her a lot of food for thought. She sat in her desk chair for a long while trying to work something out in her mind. The charity auction gala honoring her boss was this Friday and she had yet to invite Jason to the event.
Part of her was thrilled at the idea of having a date. The thought about going alone to the event and the hours of holding her one glass of white wine and smiling and listening to the same types of stories all night was cringe-worthy. She should know; she’d done it for years. The evening would be so much better with Jason at her side. She didn’t dwe
ll on the fact that any night with Jason at her side was better because of him.
They had things to hash out, though, such as the dress code. He’d have to wear a suit. He had one of those, right? Maybe not, since he didn’t need one for his job. He wore an entirely different kind of suit, one that made him a hero in her mind. Firefighters both thrilled her and terrified her. Until she’d taken the county as a client to repair the fire department’s image, she’d never seen them as real humans. They were movie stars playing the role of saving people. Now she knew better.
Jason deserved to know why she always kept her legs covered. He hadn’t asked her about it yet; they didn’t yet have the day-to-day intimacy of showering together or getting ready for work. It bothered her a little. On the one hand, she was more open and herself with Jason than she was with anyone else, even Ari. They cuddled in bed or on the couch, talking for hours about current events, sports, their dreams, but they still hadn’t delved deeply into their pasts. She knew it was her fault. Jason had told her lots of details about his life in Aberdeen. About his older brother who was his best friend. He wanted her to meet his brother.
It made it more than a fling. It formed them into a full-blown relationship. She was deluding herself pretending it was simply about sex. There was more to her and Jason than good in bed. Thanks to him, she’d done a few minutes of job searching for PR jobs at nonprofits. And she’d made discreet calls on his behalf to the International Search and Rescue Team. She wanted to know more about the application process and how to help him.
At last, she picked up the receiver and dialed.
“Val?” His deep voice made her smile.
“Hi, Jason.”
“What’s up? I thought you were at lunch with Ari.”
She liked that he knew her daily schedule. “I was. We finished and I’m back at work now.”
“How’s that crazy redhead?”
She laughed. “She’s good. She says hi, but that’s not why I’m calling.” There was silence on the other end while he waited for her to explain. “I want to invite you to a charity ball Friday night.”
“I’ll double-check my schedule, but I think I’m off shift this Friday,” Jason said.
“We can talk more about it later, but it’s formal. We’ll have to dress up.”
“How dressy?” He sounded suspicious. “I don’t own a penguin suit.”
She chuckled. “Not that dressy. A dark suit will be fine.” She didn’t say that if this thing between them went somewhere, he’d probably have to invest in a tuxedo. She was required to attend a few black-tie events each year.
“I think I can find a dark suit somewhere, maybe in the back of my closet. I’ll try not to embarrass you too much,” he said.
She’d never even thought of him embarrassing her. Her hesitation in inviting him had been based purely on her own emotional reticence, not anything to do with him as a person. She was surprised and worried he thought her capable of such thoughts. “You could never embarrass me,” she said firmly. “But I think we should be discreet that you’re there as my date, because my boss will be there, and he may not think it’s cool I’m sleeping with a client.”
There was a long pause. “Ouch,” he finally said quietly.
Her skirt twisted in her fist. “I’m sorry?”
“Valerie, I thought this was more than sex. I kind of thought we were a couple.”
It was suddenly hard to breathe. When she’d waltzed into the station and told him she wanted to sleep with him, she’d stupidly neglected to work through all the ramifications. She’d been thinking with her suddenly awake libido, not her brain. Her best friend thought they were a couple, and now Jason thought the same. The question was what she thought. It was all too confusing.
“Valerie, you still there?”
“I’m here,” she managed. “I’m sorry. You’re right,” she admitted. “It’s more than sex, but my boss might not love that I’m with a client.”
“Gotcha.”
“Maybe you don’t want to come to the party. I told you it’s going to be boring. These things usually are. Though there’s a chance Lance might be there. You know from the golf tournament.”
“I know,” he said. “We’ve actually spoken a few times since then.”
“You have?” Great, now Lance thought they were a couple.
“Yeah. He’s a cool guy. He wants me to improve my golf game so he and Sam, that FBI guy, can have a buddy at the charity events.”
A surprised laugh found its way out of her chest. Ari’s words to go with what felt good reverberated back in her brain. She decided not to overthink the labels applied to her and Jason. “That sounds like Lance. So anyway, about Friday, if you’re sure you want to come, can you pick me up at seven thirty at my parents’ house?” She took a deep breath as she plunged feet first into official relationship waters. Having him pick her up at her house meant another possible meeting with her parents. This time as her date, not a friend. It was akin to a formal declaration. Her parents had been surprisingly closemouthed about her absences the two nights she’d slept at Jason’s; she knew it couldn’t last. In fact, she was rethinking sleeping at Jason’s tonight.
Given her long absence from the dating game, she knew they were thrilled she was dipping her toes in the romantic waters. At the time, they were still her parents, and until her apartment was finished—supposedly tomorrow—she had to be discreet.
“Yes, I can pick you up at your parents’, and I’ll see you tonight. I can’t wait for Friday. You’re gonna wear something hot, aren’t you?” he asked.
“You’ll have to wait and see,” she said in a low sexy tone. She resolved to go get something new tomorrow. She’d been planning on a boring little black dress with opaque black stockings that was entirely work appropriate, but maybe something more fun, something that looked as if it came from Arianna’s closet, would be better. She hung up with Jason and turned to her computer and found some fun shopping sites for ideas on which dress might make Jason drool.
Dinner was finally over, and Valerie closed the dishwasher door with a thud. “You weren’t hungry tonight,” Jason observed from his position at the fridge, where he was wrapping and storing the leftovers.
“Nope. We had a catered client meeting today in the afternoon. Usually I ignore the donuts, but today I didn’t.”
Jason came around the counter and pulled her closer, while moaning à la Homer Simpson, “Mmm, donuts.”
She laughed and wriggled in his arms from his lips that tickled while he nibbled at her neck as if she were a chocolate glazed. Then his lips found hers and the giggles ceased as the passion between them flared. His fingers had just found an interesting place on her anatomy when his cell rang.
“Shit,” he muttered.
“Ignore it.”
“Can’t. There’s a chance I have to go in tonight.” He stepped away from her and reached for his phone on the counter. From his words and frown, she knew nothing romantic was happening tonight.
He hung up and looked at her, about to apologize.
She held up a hand. “Don’t. I understand work. Go. Do your thing, Mr. Hero.”
He grinned, which had the predicted effect on her knees. “I’ll see you Friday then, Ms. Wainwright. Wearing something sexy, right?”
She nodded, both relieved and disappointed that he had to go and she’d lost the opportunity to reveal her legs and her secrets. “Friday.”
Chapter Twelve
Friday night, Jason pulled into Valerie’s parents’ driveway feeling unaccountably nervous. He’d seen her less than forty-eight hours ago when she’d come over Wednesday, but there was something formal to tonight’s date, and it wasn’t only because they were in formal wear. Valerie’s invitation meant this thing between them was serious. She’d trusted him enough to let him in, and now she’d invited him into her world. A world of graduate degrees from top-tier universities and six-figure Beltway jobs. He hoped he didn’t embarrass her.
He h
opped out of his truck and walked up the dimly lit path to the house. The address numbers on their door were in a shadow and hard to read. He’d have to tell the Wainwrights to fix it. It sucked when he was racing to a scene and was slowed down by having to hunt for house numbers. Most times the smoke pouring from the house was a beacon to firefighters, but he wouldn’t want Valerie or her folks delayed in getting services if they needed the police or an ambulance.
The doorbell was barely finished chiming when the front door swung open and Valerie’s stepmother stood greeting him.
He shook her hand as the petite, well-coiffed blonde smiled up at him. When he’d met her the first time, he hadn’t paid much attention to her dissimilar looks to Valerie. Now he could see it was clear they weren’t related by blood.
And then Valerie was gliding down the stairs and he forgot everything else in the world except the gorgeous woman in the silky reddish dress with matching stockings coming toward him. He swallowed, doing a quick check his tongue wasn’t literally hanging down his chin.
“Jason,” Valerie said with a smile. “You look…great.”
“You, too. Seriously gorgeous.” He leaned down to brush her cheek with his lips and kept his palm on her lower back. He was going to have to keep her close tonight. One look at her in that dress, and the male population of the city was going to be fighting him for her.
He gave a quick glance around the house for her father, but he was nowhere in sight. A part of him was relieved. He understood Valerie was a grown woman, but most dads didn’t want to shake hands with the guy sleeping with his daughter without the sanctity of marriage.
“Valerie?”
They both turned to her stepmother, who stood frozen staring at Val in her cleavage-baring dress. “Valerie,” she whispered. “That dress…it’s not a work suit.”
“I know, Mom,” Valerie interrupted.
Jason was unprepared for what happened next. Only his firefighter training kept him on his feet when Judy leapt into his arms and planted a huge kiss on his cheek. “You’re so good for her,” she whispered into his ear. “Keep doing whatever it is you’re doing.”