“Now?”
“Not a moment to waste, is there?” Tetra said. “You have kept me alive for perhaps another week or so. The minutes become a lot more important when your measurements of time constrict so tightly.”
Zelda tried not to let her delight at keeping Tetra alive get the best of her visible emotions. She could only muster “thank you” before she hurried up the stairs, leaving Romarus and Yeva. She used a small amount of fire to light the way, hurrying up the stairs mostly by memory instead of light. Behind her, she heard Tetra rising. She couldn’t stop to cry, knowing if she did, it would take her a long time to get back up.
When Zelda got up, she quickly found what Tetra spoke of. She flipped open the first journal and began reading, sucked into the world Garo wrote of.
Her first moment of wonder came when she read how Chrystos was not a god of purity, but a flawed being. It made her wonder—if she was made in his image, did that mean she would do some of the same things he did? Or would she keep it under control, using that vengefulness and anger in a guided and proper direction?
A much darker thought entered her mind when she considered this. What demons did Garo face? What ones did he conquer? Which ones defeated him? How had they manifested themselves in his lifetime? What did Garo do or believe that would horrify Zelda?
She recalled Romarus saying that Garo was no god. At the time, she had assumed it meant that he was a human being who knew magic, a mage. That had not seemed that surprising.
But perhaps he had meant it in a darker tone. Even if so, Zelda didn’t want to know.
She then read about the creation of Bahamut, Ragnor, and Indica. What she read did not necessarily fill her with awe, for she knew that the destruction of the dragons had created a level of chaos in the world that no one had foreseen. But it did underline to her the importance of stopping Artemia and made her feel grateful Tetra had chosen not to die. Even if Tetra’s death would have resulted in a net gain with opportunity for Zelda, the young girl worried she wouldn’t know how to seize it as Tetra would.
Just reading that alone seemed like so much, but also so little. Garo had three journals worth, each of them a couple hundred pages, and she’d only read a couple pages. But she also had limited time and had to make the most of them.
Knowing she could not read all of it today—though perhaps that day would come at a different time—she grabbed the third journal and flipped to the end, wondering what Garo’s last recorded thoughts were. To her surprise, the journal only had about a third of it filled. The rest remained a blank slate.
She found the last entry, the one that began with the words, “Today, I saw how the world might end.” With it having her full attention, she dived right in.
“Through many visions, I have seen the world through the eyes of Chrystos. He has shown me the past of Hydor, the past of humanity, the past of the magi, and the past of the empire. I have often hoped that he would show me a vision of the future, if one could produce such a thing. However, after what I witnessed today, I worry that I may have made a mistake in my desires.
“In today’s vision, I stood on top of a mountain that I did not recognize. Upon that mountain, I saw many towns that I also did not recognize, lending credence to the idea of this taking place in the future. The sky turned a dark red, as if the stars themselves bled from above. Then a single white light appeared in the red sky, growing in size until it became so large it consumed more of my sight than the red in the sky. The white light then exploded, and out of the blinding light emerged a figure whose details slowly came into view.
“But this was not Chrystos. This was a beast with six horns, three fingers with claws for its two hands, and six tails with spears that would pierce Hydor itself. This was Iblis, and even seeing it in a vision left me in a state of terror.
“Iblis laughed as he moved through the land freely. Though not of particularly massive size, the god had such power that with a single lift of his hand, he annihilated an entire city. The city simply vanished, replaced by smoldering ash. I looked around, wondering if someone might come and help, but no one came to aid the people.
“Iblis continued to wander through Hydor, annihilating all that he saw. In this moment, I came to understand the true danger of Iblis and all who act in his image. They do not wish to control existence. They wish to eradicate it. Why, I cannot say. Vengeance for past failures. A mental loop in which one sees the world as flawed, looks for examples of it, and has that reinforce itself. Simple madness. Something else. I don’t know.
“But I do know this. I pray that those whom I love, as well as any descendants I or Tetra may have, do not live to see this day. For if it comes, not even the magi will stand a chance. The good in us is good because it follows rules. The evil in us is evil because it follows no rules. That gives it an advantage good does not have, and if evil ever overtakes a soul, it is hard to recover it. Iblis exemplifies this the most.”
Zelda shuddered, having had so much fear instilled in her that she had to close the journal. The faith of the magi had never felt so real upon reading Garo’s words. The idea of the foil of Chrystos destroying the world in vengeance terrified her. If that happened…
It was just a vision and a meditation. If such a thing happens, you will have no control over it. But you can defeat Artemia.
When she considered this, though, she thought of a line from the text—“the true danger of Iblis and all who act in his image.” She didn’t think Artemia deliberately acted in the image of Iblis. But if ever anyone did, it was Artemia from what little Zelda had seen and how easily she had left Eric and Romarus behind on her return to Caia.
Seeking more comforting reading, she spent the rest of the day reading from the first journal, one which told of tales such as the first magi, the rise of the empire, and exemplary magi of the past. It made for a much more pleasant experience than seeing how everything she held dear might vanish one day.
Several hours later, Tetra, Romarus, and Yeva came from downstairs. Tetra no longer walked stiffly, though she still retained the physical appearance of a lady much older than her.
“Eric and Abe will return here soon,” Romarus said. “Let us meet them at the opening of the library. The darkness will shield us from the empire, if they still hate us.”
They still do. They will until…
Zelda could not come up with an answer. She didn’t think she ever would.
CHAPTER 13: TETRA
Even now, after having had all day to ponder how a young girl, not even two decades old, had convinced Tetra to stay alive, she could not figure out an answer to that question.
Tetra had started the evening the day before convinced she’d end her life having taken down both Artemia and the Syrast Empire. But the former had only become a goal in recent times. The latter had stayed a goal her entire life. Accomplishing the latter left her not caring about the first.
Perhaps Zelda will become a legend even greater than Garo himself. If she can convince me to stick around a little longer, there’s no telling what the girl will do.
She allowed herself a small smile as she looked around the room. She, Zelda, Romarus, Yeva, Eric, and Abe all sat around a bonfire in which the books of the emperor’s creation burned. Although they had pulled several books in order to ignite and keep the fire going, Tetra had no concern. In fact, she considered it a sacred mission to destroy the lies and propaganda of the empire. To not do so would be to set up future generations for failure.
“Are you worried the empire will come looking for you, Eric?” Zelda asked.
She’ll have to grow out of her concern and anxiety.
Or maybe that’s a benefit of hers. She will show more caution than I did and lead to less death.
“Perhaps, but not overly so,” he said nonchalantly. “The empire seems more intent on trapping magi than they do keeping tabs on us. As long as we return before late into the evening, no one will suspect anything.”
“Or, people will suspect us
, but no one will have the standing to say anything,” Abe corrected him.
“Something like that,” Eric said. “The only person they can’t find is you, Kar—Tetra.”
Tetra nodded. She didn’t need to correct Eric. It simply didn’t matter at this point if he got her name right or not. It only mattered that he fight by her side and vice versa in the coming days.
“They won’t,” Tetra said. “I could disappear from all of you right now.”
“Tetra,” Zelda said.
“Not like that,” Tetra said reassuringly. “But right now… I won’t be found. Of all the things I’m worried about, I’m not worried about that.”
A long pause came as Eric and Zelda seemed satisfied with their answers. Tetra tried to pick out the individual books that burned. She hoped none of them came from Garo, but the hunters had specific instructions to grab books from the entrance inward, making it exceedingly unlikely that anything of value would burn.
Fortunately, at the moment, only books written by the empire or men she knew were not magi sat in the bonfire.
“What do you worry about, Tetra?” Yeva asked.
At first, Tetra thought to answer the question curtly. But in truth, a lot worried her. She had barely admitted to herself in the past, but with such little time left, Tetra felt it important to express herself.
“Whenever I look to the ceiling of the library, I see the mural of Bahamut. I see what it means to try and control history. And I think of how badly Rufus wanted to control history. How badly he wanted to eradicate my kind. How badly he wanted to erase the contributions of Garo. And now? They’re both gone. Dead. The world remembers them, but the world does not delay in thinking about them. If you ask me, one has gone to Chrystos and one to Iblis, but I have no idea. Perhaps they’re gone forever. Perhaps I will simply never see them again. You want to know what I worry about? I worry about that.”
Tetra sighed, having thought that she was done. But the outpouring of thoughts had come like a shattered dam, and now she had to continue to speak.
“I worry that I failed Garo as a wife. I loved him so much, but I took that love for granted. I want to excuse myself for it by saying, ‘How could I not? We lived for over two hundred years.’ Except I know that he treated me well. He never took that love for granted. Even when I became Kara, even when I distanced myself from him as a new person, he always looked at me as a husband would. And I became… I don’t know. Unloving. Loving, but not as a wife should.”
She looked at the three young warriors, the next generation of fighters. Zelda. Eric. Yeva.
“If the three of you ever find love, don’t let it go to waste,” she said. “And I don’t mean the kind of love where you fall for someone physically. I mean the kind where you would give your very existence to see them smile. If you don’t know what it is, don’t worry, it’ll come.”
“Will it?”
The voice of Eric surprised her. She had never taken him as the thoughtful, reflective type. He seemed too zealously focused on a given task or easily manipulated by a beautiful girl for him to spend time thinking about anything.
“What do you mean?” Tetra asked, mindful of what she had done to him as a younger-looking Kara.
“You say we will find love someday,” Eric said. “But all I’ve known in my life is death. Death of my mother. Death of my sister. Death of the magi. Death of my comrades in the guild when we fought Indica. For Hydor’s sake, I almost witnessed my own death. I can’t describe it, but I swear I did. How can a man love when death surrounds him?”
Tetra paused and thought through what she wanted to say carefully. But someone else beat her to the punch.
“It’s because of death that love becomes so valuable,” Abe said. “I have never married. But in the most dangerous of moments, love has a tendency to blossom in ways it doesn’t during times that are too tranquil or peaceful. I don’t mean lust. Lust will destroy a man or a woman. It nearly destroyed me when, if I’m being honest with everyone here, I lusted after Artemia.”
No one said a word. Tetra tried not to judge Abe, for she knew everyone had their sins, but she had trouble understanding just what the old man had ever seen in Artemia.
“All of the older generation here has done something stupid in the name of what they thought was love,” Abe said.
“It’s true,” Tetra said. “Garo himself tried to kill a legendary dragon for me. He loved me, not just wanted me, but I think Abe makes a greater point. The feelings you have for someone else can blaze a path that you never thought could appear. It will burn through the most fireproof of walls, tear down the most fortified of defenses, and keep you alive in the most desperate situations.”
Different people started to speak up, but then she heard someone sniffling. The bonfire went silent as everyone turned to the person crying.
“Yeva?” Eric asked. “Are you OK?”
Yeva took a few seconds to compose herself, blowing her nose and then taking a few deep breaths.
“All of this conversation, it just reminds me of Norius,” she said. “He charged into battle against Indica like a madman. I cried out to him, but I don’t think anyone could’ve stopped him. And how my parents died in Dabira. It’s just, it’s just been a lot.”
Everyone tried to give Yeva the silence her words deserved. But one continued, and as he did, Tetra saw not insensitivity, but incredible empathy.
“Norius did something right since we won that battle,” Eric said. “He truly was a brave man.”
“Or crazy,” Yeva said with a sniffle.
“Crazy for his own self-preservation? Maybe. Crazy for defending the woman he loved? Not at all.”
Although Tetra didn’t think Eric had the experience or maturity to speak to that, she couldn’t deny the truth in his words. If anything, it marked his own growth. Perhaps Eric could still easily be persuaded by the charm of a lovely lady. Perhaps he still focused on revenge to an almost fatal degree.
But this was not the Eric that she had met during the battle with Indica. This was an Eric who had changed in the last month.
And, Tetra noted with a hint of interest, Yeva seemed to notice too.
“You’re sweet,” she said. “Thank you.”
She looked like she wanted to say more but she said nothing more.
“It’s not romantic love, but Mama did it for me too,” Zelda said. “She sacrificed herself so that I could live. Her wishes stick with me every day.”
“See?” Tetra said.
“But… I’m not sure how I feel about it now.”
That caught Tetra off-guard. Her mother’s words had compelled her to ignore the Shadows of the Empire and go to Dabira—and now she wanted to question them? So much had changed for the younger generation in the last month. Tetra felt like she had to erase all her assumptions about them.
“I feel like I need to find my own path,” Zelda said. “But I don’t know how to do that. I don’t know where to do that. And it’s just not the right time with Artemia. I feel like I have all this power but none of the time to figure out how to use it. Mama always said I have to use magic for good. And I try. But I don’t know how I’m using magic for good when I’m killing soldiers. Or just killing, period. I feel bad killing an animal to eat. Is that crazy?”
“No,” Romarus said. “Zelda, more than anyone else in this group, I have observed you. With apologies to Eric, whom I spent more time with, you caught my eye the most because of your potential and your desire to return to Caia. Who would return to the city in which their mother died and the powers that be wanted you dead? Only someone special. And to be special, you have to have special characteristics. Your compassion, even for your enemies, is one.”
“I hope so,” Zelda said. “I really hope so. Because the doubts I have… and you talk about love, but I’ve never loved anyone besides Mama.”
To everyone’s surprise, someone laughed. But it wasn’t someone who would know anything about love.
It was Eric.
“Zelda, how would we know anything about love?” Eric said. “And for that matter, why is it important? You loved your mother. I loved my mother and my sister, too. I’m sure Yeva loved her family and Norius. Sadly, like your mother, they were all murdered. We don’t have to love anyone else right now. Fighting for familial love can work just as well.”
Tetra couldn’t help but smile. The boy really had become a man, at least in thoughts and words, in the last month.
And once again, she noticed Yeva glancing at Eric in a way that went beyond simply observant.
“You know, for such young folk, you all are wise beyond your years,” Abe said. “I feel some level of grief that it has come because of circumstances that have affected us all, but perhaps if you use this wisdom for good when it is all said and done, you can make Hydor a better place. No longer should the land be ruled by the Syrast Empire, but perhaps by something else. The three of you can form some combination of leadership in the land. No one would dare defy governance by those who defeated Artemia.”
Eric and Yeva both laughed, and when they did so, they exchanged glances. The two smiled at each other, warming Tetra’s heart. It can blossom anywhere.
Zelda, though, remained curiously silent.
“I think, though, we should rest,” Tetra said. “We should depart in the morning as soon as we can. Eric and Abe, you will also be needed at the palace before the night is out.”
“I will go ahead,” Abe said, also having noticed Eric and Yeva’s budding connection. “Eric, hang back here for a bit. Make sure everyone understands the plan for tomorrow as we discussed.”
Eric looked perplexed, but bit his tongue. The two of them had never made plans—Abe had just given Eric an excuse to remain behind.
Legends of the War (War of the Magi Book 3) Page 16