Just being here was nice. It had been years since Indigo had gazed up into a starry sky, and here in Arkansas, in Cole’s company, the heavens looked almost within her grasp.
Chapter Sixteen
Indigo leaned against Cole, but she didn’t reach for him or cuddle against him. She had pushed too far earlier. The closed look on his face when asked about his breakup was all the warning she needed. A comfortable silence settled between them as she focused on the night sky, which looked like diamonds randomly flung on black velvet.
Finally, Cole spoke. “You asked me about my breakup earlier, and I was rude. I’m sorry,” he murmured.
Indigo turned to face him. “I shouldn’t have intruded.”
“It’s not you,” Cole began. He looked down for a long moment before locking his eyes with her. “Her name was Jessica. Well, it still is Jessica, I suppose. We dated for four years. I thought I was going to marry her. Although I hadn’t proposed yet, I did go ring shopping.”
Indigo hesitated. Some part of her liked the distance she had just placed between them. There were some things she preferred to keep secret, as well. With this confession, her earlier reticence to share might be washed away in the black wilderness of the lake where stars reflected their brilliance. Still, she didn’t want to stop him from telling his own story. Cole was reaching out to her, and her earlier wish to know him reasserted itself with earnest fervor.
Besides, sometimes it was good to talk. And he listened to her with patience; she could afford him the same. Offering him a listening ear was the least she could do. It was the act of a good friend. “What happened?”
“Our business is headquartered in California, and I own a home in LA and in the northern part of the state. I consider Washington my permanent residence, but I spent as much if not more time in California. Jessica lived in LA and worked in the accounting office at HQ. One day, while in Washington, I got a call from my brother, Landon. His girlfriend, Ashely, is a legal assistant in the accounting department. She and Jessica worked together. Anyway, he told me that Ashely told him that Jessica was embezzling money from the business. At first, I didn’t believe them. They flew up to Washington and laid out all the paperwork. The checks Jessica had forged. Her steps on the computer to try to cover it all up. Everything.”
Indigo felt Cole’s body grow hot and stiff with the reliving of his story. She wished to reach out and touch him with a cool hand of understanding and support, but she didn’t want to startle him. “That must’ve been a tough conversation,” she murmured.
“Yes. Once Landon and Ashely convinced me of the truth, I was ashamed and embarrassed. I was supposed to be overseeing her, and I’d let our relationship get in the way. Jessica and I never talked privately again.” Cole paused. “Like I said earlier, my brother, Landon, is a lawyer, and he insisted that every conversation from our discovery on be with at least one witness. We confronted her as a family.”
Indigo’s heart beat hard and sorrowful for Cole. “I’m sorry. That must’ve carried its own difficulties.”
He continued, “I’ve never been so humiliated in my life. I was the head accountant for my family’s business. For generations, my family, including my own parents, have worked hard to come from nothing to build this empire, and I was responsible for overseeing it—and I had failed them in every way.” A shudder went through him.
Indigo moved closer. Her desire to touch Cole overrode everything else. She placed her hand over Cole’s. “What happened next?”
“Jessica went to jail. She stole over five hundred thousand dollars in the space of six months. She spent it on clothes, jewelry—lots of jewelry—a Jaguar she somehow kept from me, and a couple of girls’ weekends to Hawaii I didn’t know about. She paid for herself and three of her closest friends to stay at the Four Seasons on Maui. Each of them got their own suite.” His jaw tightened. “That was the thing about Jessica. It wasn’t enough to have a couple of nice cars. She needed a dozen of the most expensive. She wanted a five-thousand-square-foot ski cabin in Aspen, a beach house in Miami, a cattle ranch in Montana, a waterfront home in the San Juan Islands off of the Washington coast, a penthouse condo in Manhattan … I have several homes already, but none of them were up to Jessica’s standards or in the right location.” He shook his head vehemently. “I don’t even like New York! And she craved diamonds like some women crave ice cream. When she got tired of hearing me say no, she told herself yes and stole from me.” He paused. “But more importantly, she stole from my family, who treated her like one of their own.”
Indigo’s blanket slipped from her shoulders, but she didn’t feel the chill of the night. She squeezed Cole’s cold fingers, hoping to infuse them with warmth while offering him understanding. It amazed her how much she had to give him by way of comfort. All she’d done for the last year and a half was take comfort from others. Cole was giving her a gift, even if he didn’t know it. The gift of sharing another’s pain and sorrow. Surprisingly, she was up to the task and welcomed it. His sharing made her feel strong. “I’m so sorry,” she whispered. “The betrayal must’ve been terrible.”
Cole’s look intensified. “That’s just it! It wasn’t just the money. It was the betrayal.” He turned from Indigo. “But there was more. For months, I couldn’t look at myself in the mirror. I thought I was some hotshot accountant, when really I was an idiot who got taken by a leggy blonde in a tight dress.”
“We all get taken in by something,” Indigo responded, thinking of Sam’s desire for new things. She understood what it was like to live with someone who wanted so much. “Did the business recover?” she asked gently. She hadn’t regained her own financial footing—not yet, anyway.
Cole looked down. “Yeah. And my family did, too. No one blamed me. We’re all very close, but I’ve had a hard time forgiving myself. It’s what brought me to Arkansas.”
Indigo raised his chin, her eyes meeting his. “The search for forgiveness, you mean? Is that what brought you here?”
“Yeah, and some peace.”
Indigo’s heart and breath stilled. Those were the same reasons she’d fled her home. “Have you found it?”
Cole locked his gaze with Indigo’s. “Maybe,” he whispered. “You’re the first person I’ve told, outside of my family, and there’s something … freeing about the telling.”
She studied him. The lines around his mouth and eyes softened, and all hardness dropped away from his expression. His look became beseeching, as if he was asking something of her through sharing his shame and pain.
“I’m honored you chose me.” A new thought came to her. “Is that why you insisted on having me show you the receipts and you needed to check on my work all the time?”
“Yeah. I wasn’t going to be taken for a fool again.”
Indigo drew closer. All thoughts of Sam retreated. What remained was the starry night reflected in the lake and Cole. The desire to erase the distance between them, touch his skin, and offer him safety made her bold. Shifting her weight, she leaned near and caressed Cole’s cheek. “You can look through all of my records anytime,” she murmured. “I will not cheat you.”
“I know.” Cole reached for her, his whispered breath moving against her cheek. His lips touched her skin as the heat of him ebbed into her like gentle lapping waves.
His roughened cheek against her skin and the sharp smell of cedar and juniper mingled with the heavy night scent of the lake, taking her breath away and making her gasp, her belly warming and flushed. How she had ached for this closeness without even knowing it. Now that it was upon her, it was everything she wanted.
Trembling, she moved closer as her blanket fell to the seat and Cole pulled her into an embrace. Hot, raw emotion pulsed through her like a fire ready to move from ember to flame as Cole’s lips found hers. Indigo opened to his insistent yet supple kiss. Reaching up, she splayed her hands in Cole’s thick dark hair, feeling the softness between her fingers as she rose to meet his lips. Her body weakened against his while a n
ew strength budded from within, coupled with a new sense of womanhood. This was different from anything she and Sam shared.
Sam! Disgrace over her indiscretion filled her. Oh! Sam! Indigo pulled away from Cole, the air leaving her lungs. She covered her mouth with her hands. What had she done? Questions swirled with guilt.
“I’ve surprised you,” Cole said. “I’m sorry.”
Indigo sought his gaze while trying to sort out her feelings, but nothing made sense. Memories of Sam played in her head, but they couldn’t quite touch the feelings about her shared kiss with Cole and the way he enticed something entirely new from her in both her desire and femininity. She looked at him, his eyes filled with concern and regret. She had to fix this somehow. “No. You’ve done nothing wrong.” She shook her head. “I mean, it’s just that—” The words refused to form. She turned from Cole, discouragement mounting as the seconds ticked by. How could she explain what she didn’t understand? “Actually, I don’t know what I mean.”
“You haven’t kissed anyone since Sam, have you?”
Relief trickled through Indigo. Gratitude for Cole’s sensitivity soothed her throbbing stupidity. At least she didn’t need to explain that part of her foolish response. “No. I haven’t.” She wanted to make light of the moment, but the taste of Cole’s lingering kiss, like some kind of luscious forbidden fruit, kept her from pretending humor, even as the awkwardness of the moment overwhelmed her. She wished to run, but on the boat, there wasn’t any place for her. “I’m sorry. I should’ve—”
“Indigo. Please. There’s nothing to apologize for. We each have our grief, even if we’ve suffered different losses.”
Indigo’s humiliation eased and she allowed air to seep into her lungs, her eyes searching Cole’s. “Thank you for … not making fun of me.”
Cole gave her a patient smile. “I would never do that.” He pulled away, and although Indigo was grateful for the distance, she missed his warmth as the cool evening air took his place.
“What would you prefer to do?” Cole asked. “I can take you back to the house, if you’d like.”
Indigo was torn. She should go home, get as far away from Cole and all of the new affection and longing he opened within her, but it was the last thing she wanted. “Can we just sit here and watch for falling stars for a few more minutes?” she asked. Maybe some time in each other’s company would help everything settle. More than anything, she wished to remain here with him, even as the memory of Sam danced in her mind like the stars pirouetting on the water.
Cole’s look softened. “We can do that.” Wrapping Indigo back up in her blanket, they settled together quietly, watching fire brand the sky with every star that fell to earth. With each streak of light, they would point and marvel. Their shared love of the night sky deepened their bond.
Every passing minute alternately settled and roused Indigo. Delight enthralled her as she searched and then found a new fiery star, while Cole’s company stirred both feelings Indigo considered long dead and new emotions she hadn’t known existed.
Cole made nothing out of her response to his kiss. His heartfelt acceptance of her and Sam helped her embrace his presence in a way that included him in the sacred trust she and Sam shared, moving her closer to Cole. His easy companionship made her feel safe and stirred her in new ways that were welcome even though they frightened her.
After an hour, Cole stood, wrapping his blanket around himself. “I need to get you back to the house,” he said. “Your roommate will be looking for you.”
Indigo was taken aback. She needed and was ready to go home, but some newly assured place within wasn’t ready to leave Cole’s company. “How did you know I told her where I’d be?”
“Because you’re a smart girl.” Leaving his blanket on the bench, he moved to the wheel, where he started the engine of the boat and began steering it toward home. Indigo reached over, feeling the warmth of Cole’s blanket, and nestled in close, the scent of juniper wafting around her.
The trip to the dock was shorter than Indigo had hoped, but she was also grateful. With each nautical mile put behind them, Sam’s memory grew closer. She was appreciative of his increasing presence, even though Indigo’s lips still throbbed with the feel of Cole’s kiss. The pleasant sensation of his mouth on hers wouldn’t leave, creating a divide within her heart. She was drawn to Cole, and she longed to give in to the feelings that were unfurling within.
But Sam. Dear Sam.
In kissing Cole, Indigo had completely forgotten about Sam for the space of a minute, and what reminded her of him was that Sam never kissed her with that kind of passion and explosive emotion. The freedom it offered was both tantalizing and agonizing. For one brief moment, her heart and soul had been wiped clean of grief and any memory or promise to Sam. But it hadn’t lasted. There were still pieces of her marriage that Indigo would always carry, including the financial debt she harbored. Love was part of that burden, but even if it wasn’t, she would never be free of it.
Once they docked, Suzette appeared with a tote of clean dishes and leftover food. Cole moved from the wheel of the boat. “Let me help you with that.” He took the tote from Suzette and looked at Indigo. “If you don’t mind waiting just a minute, I’ll be back to walk you up the stairs, or you can come up with us. Whatever suits you.”
Indigo considered her options. It would be nice to have a quiet moment in the middle of stars and water. It might allow her to gather her thoughts and determine how best to handle the goodbye she and Cole would share. It would also afford her more time alone with Cole—the very thing she desired but was afraid to explore. Perhaps the best thing would be to go along with him and Suzette. “I’ll follow along, if you don’t mind.”
“Of course. Hold on to the rail, though. I know it’s well lit, but it’s quite steep and easy to stumble.”
Indigo nodded and followed Cole and Suzette off the boat. She was determined she wouldn’t look back, but as she set her mind, she turned. The dock lights blazed, as did the lights from the boat, giving a comforting invitation to come back and remember the impassioned kiss she and Cole had shared under the stars.
Indigo quickly turned her back to the stars and grabbed the rail before following Cole and Suzette.
Back at the house, Suzette bade Indigo a warm goodnight. “Thanks so much for coming, dear. I hope you had a good time.” Suzette’s eyes reflected motherly sincerity, giving Indigo a peek into the gracious affection Suzette felt for Cole. It was obvious that their relationship held more meaning than just employee and boss. They shared an honest personal interest. It threw her off balance. In spite of Cole’s billionaire status, he wasn’t absorbed in the things that his ex-girlfriend desired and all the trappings of money. He fostered and cared for relationships above all. It showed in how he worked with Cara and Phillip and the parents of the kids he sponsored.
She hugged Suzette. “Thank you. The meal was delicious, and I had a lovely time.”
Cole settled the tote on the kitchen counter before facing Indigo. “I’ll walk you to your car.”
Indigo sighed. Leaving would get her out from under the exhaustion that followed the conflict within her heart. But as Cole walked her through the cool spring night, she wished to stay. What would she find if she probed once more into his past? Would he open himself up as he had earlier?
Even though it wasn’t a good idea, she wanted it—wanted to be connected to him emotionally. But there was another side to that coin. What would she reveal? If she didn’t leave soon, the safety Cole offered would pull her under, and she would end up disclosing pieces of herself and her marriage to Sam that she preferred to keep secret.
Reaching her car, she turned. “Thank you. I’ve had the best time. Everything was perfect.” She longed to reach for him and pull him close. What would happen if she kissed him one more time? The image of wrapping herself in Cole’s arms, his lips on hers with the earlier passion they shared came to her fierce and fast. She fought that desire, willing a memory of Sa
m to come to her aid. She pictured him as they sat in his drift boat on the McKenzie, a fishing pole in his hand and a smile on his face. How fitting that her first date with Cole should be on the water.
She swallowed. How did her thoughts come back to Cole once again?
“I know this is hard,” Cole said. “And I’m honored to be the first man you’d see after losing Sam. Thank you for that trust.”
Relief washed through Indigo. Her defenses crumbled. “You really do understand, don’t you?”
“Yeah. I do.”
Indigo gazed into Cole’s dark eyes, his soul revealed in his tender look. She needed to leave, or all thoughts of Sam would perish. Still, some rogue desire kept her rooted to her spot. Just one more touch would be enough. That was all she wanted.
As if reading her mind, Cole reached down and caressed her cheek. She leaned into his roughened fingers moving across her skin. Reaching up for his hand, she squeezed his palm.
Cole returned the pressure of her hand and stepped close. “Thank you for coming.” His voice was low and intimate.
The warmth of his skin invited Indigo to move closer. One more touch hadn’t been enough, but she refused to give in to the desire swirled inside. She folded herself inside of her car as Cole leaned on the window frame.
“I’ll see you soon,” he said.
Indigo nodded as Cole closed the door and she started the engine. He stepped back on the porch and waved under the lights as she pulled from his driveway and into the inky night.
There were no streetlamps, just her headlights that swung across trees and the road with each turn of her car. Finally, she passed the Sweetheart Tree and once again wondered about the initials carved in the trunk. Would she ever carve a heart into the bark of a tree? Her face colored with embarrassment. This was not the time to be sentimental. She needed to think, and driving to the security hut helped. Without a wave, Elton and his unfriendly Colt 45 pushed a button that swung the large wrought-iron fence out toward the road.
Her Billionaire Betrayal (Billionaire Bachelor Mountain Cove Book 3) Page 13