As we get older, I know it won’t matter, but right now, sometimes that still feels like a big difference. Especially since I’ve already graduated college and I’m about to embark on my student teaching placement. My life is going to be totally different in a few months.
Guess I may as well have fun at a resort while I can. A summer job on the lake before I start my first job in my chosen career.
Once the paperwork is out of the way, I pick two Mitchell’s T-shirts out of a box for me to wear as part of my uniform. I can sense all of the employees nearby watching Michelle and me with curiosity, wondering who the new girl is, I suppose. I smile at them and they smile back, a couple of them even say hi.
“Everyone’s friendly here,” Michelle says to me as she walks me out of the store. We stop on the front porch, both of us surveying the lake across the road. It’s a brilliant blue, dotted with boats and the occasional water skier zipping by. “The summer season is already in full swing, so get ready. You’re going to be thrown right into it on your first day.”
“I can handle it,” I tell her, sounding extra confident, when I really don’t know what I’m talking about. This might be kind of scary, but I’ve got this.
I have to.
I need the money.
“I found a job,” I announce to my best friend after the server leaves with our dinner orders. We met up at a restaurant not too far from campus, me calling her at the last minute to see if she had the time to get together, eager and excited to tell her about my afternoon.
Hayden breaks out into a giant smile. “That’s great news! Where at?”
“Mitchell’s Landing,” I answer before I take a sip of my iced tea.
Her smile falls, her brows furrowing with confusion. “Wait a minute. Isn’t that where Caleb works?”
I nod. Paste on a bright smile. “Yep. He works on the dock.”
“And where will you work? At the restaurant?”
“The dock,” I answer, going for nonchalant.
Her frown deepens. “Uh, that sounds like trouble.”
“I can handle it.” I shrug. Take another sip. Start to feel itchy because Hayden won’t stop staring at me. I know that look. “What? You don’t think I can?”
“I totally think you can,” she’s quick to say. She always has faith in me, especially when I don’t have it in myself. This is one of the many qualities that makes Hayden such a great friend. “But can Caleb handle it? Working with you?”
I shrug. “I don’t know. That’s not my problem.”
“Whenever Caleb comes into a situation that you’re involved in, he becomes your problem.” Hayden leans across the table, her gaze serious, the frown gone. My friend is beautiful, both inside and out. She has a kind, giving heart. She’s made my college years unforgettable in the best way, and once she got together with Tony and brought him and all of his friends into our circle, it’s been a lot of fun.
Now though, it’s time for me to get serious. I’m in the credential program, I’ll be student teaching and soon I’ll be an actual teacher. And while I’m excited, I’m also scared. I’m scared of a lot of things right now, which is so unlike me.
All my fear of the unknown is making me uncomfortable.
“I know how to deal with him,” I finally say.
“Right. By ignoring him. But you’re not only living with him, you’re also working with him now. And that’s a lot, Gracie. He’s going to be everywhere. You’ll be dealing with him on a daily basis,” Hayden says, stressing those last words with extra emphasis. “And you know he’s going to say all sorts of things to get under your skin.”
He knows how to do that. That’s a particular skill of his, for sure.
“Does he know you’re working there?” she asks. I shake my head. “Then you need to tell him you’re going to be working with him. You can’t just spring this on him. Or worse, show up there and be like, surprise! I work here now!”
“Why not?”
“Can you imagine Caleb showing up at your workplace, announcing he’s just started there without warning you first? You’d flip the hell out,” Hayden says.
“Good point,” I admit grudgingly.
“I know. This is why you two need to talk. The animosity is getting you nowhere anyway. Don’t you want to get along with him?” Hayden asks.
“Of course I do. He just makes it impossible. I was doing so well not having him around too,” I say, remembering the past five months with absolute fondness.
Oh, I’m totally lying. I missed him. While he drives me crazy, there’s also something…endearing about him. He’s cute and charming and sexy. Tall and broad and so manly. I’m tempted to run my hands through his dark, thick hair and tell him to shut his awful mouth. I also want to pull him in close and see what those muscular arms feel like wrapped around me. I wouldn’t mind knowing what it would be like to have those plump lips of his land on mine. I bet he kisses like a master. I bet—
“You’re thinking about him right now, oh my God,” Hayden says, interrupting my Caleb-filled thoughts.
“I was not.” I’m defensive because I most definitely was thinking about him.
“You so were. Your cheeks are turning red. Gracie, no guy makes you blush. You’ve been with a lot of guys since I’ve known you—”
“Hey,” I interrupt, not liking the direction she’s going in.
“Don’t be offended. I’m not saying it in a bad way. It’s the truth. You’ve dated a lot of guys since freshman year, and not one of them seems to affect you like Caleb does,” Hayden explains.
“That’s because I don’t like him, remember?” I raise my brows. “He’s annoying. Like a pesky little brother.”
“Ha! You little liar. You don’t have brotherly feelings toward him. I think you not so secretly want to bang him, and that’s the real reason why you stay away from him,” Hayden says.
She is cutting way too close to the truth. “I don’t want to bang him.” Lies. “I don’t enjoy spending time with him at all.” Also semi-lies. A lot of the time, Caleb is fun. He’s rude and inappropriate and a total douche, but fun. He knows how to laugh at himself. He cracks jokes. He says silly things that are funny. “Working with him will be a test of my patience.” Absolute truth. “But maybe it will bring us—closer together. Only as friends, though.”
Not too sure about that, but it sounds good.
“Uh huh,” Hayden nods, the smirk on her face annoying me. “Maybe the two of you just need to do it and get it out of your system.”
“I don’t think that’s going to help matters,” I tell her, hating how her suggestion lights me up inside.
I would be totally down to do it with Caleb. I’m just afraid of the repercussions afterwards. I’m worried I might end up falling for him completely, and that’s just…
Not good.
I prefer being single. I don’t want to depend on anyone. People—men—let you down. My dad let down my mom on a constant basis, yet they’re still together. She complained about him all the time when I was younger, but never did anything about it. Who wants that kind of relationship?
Not me. No sir.
“I think it could help. You never know. Having sex with him could get rid of that overwhelming sexual tension that’s always brimming between the two of you once and for all,” Hayden says.
“We do not have brimming sexual tension,” I say, feeling defensive. Again.
“You so do,” she says, sending me a pointed look. “And you know it. Don’t deny it. I bet if you had sex with him, the tension would disappear. He’d treat you like a friend again. Or maybe even a non-entity. And isn’t that what you want?”
I recoil at that. I don’t want him to treat me like I don’t exist.
But isn’t that what you did to him for the first half of the year? You pushed him straight out of your life like he never mattered to you.
I hate that I did that to him. Really, I do. But my self-preservation instincts kicked in and I had to keep him at a dist
ance.
Otherwise, I would’ve done something I regretted. Like have sex with him.
“I think that’s a terrible idea,” I tell Hayden, wanting her to know where I’m coming from. “What if he falls madly in love with me?”
More like what if I fall madly in love with him?
Nah. That won’t happen. My feelings for a guy come and go so fast they barely register. I don’t know why either. My parents weren’t the best example, so maybe that had something to do with it. My older brother Dave joined the military as soon as he graduated high school to get out of the house. Now he’s happily married and living in Texas. He and Jessica already have a couple of kids.
They’re living the American dream, while I’m over here trying to get with every cute guy I see, yet they never hold my interest long enough. Or they don’t meet my needs—whatever those are.
It’s not like they’re bad guys. Most of the men I’ve been with, save for a few, have been pretty awesome. Kind. Handsome. Hard-working. Smart. Funny. Some of them were excellent in bed. A few were meh. Two in particular were flat-out awful.
When I start thinking about all of them, I always end up feeling bad. For making those choices. For having sex with so many of them and then just…moving on, like I didn’t even care. Men can be with a bunch of women and they aren’t judged. Women get with a bunch of guys, and we’re sluts.
I’m not a slut. I’m just—a woman who can’t find the right man for her. And I’m a woman who likes to have sex but doesn’t want the commitment. Commitment is scary. It’s a trap. I’ve heard my parents argue a lot over the years, and that’s one of the things my dad accused my mother of doing. She trapped him.
That’s some scary shit.
Hayden says I’m in love with the idea of falling in love. I enjoy the chase. The rush and thrill of finding someone new. Once that’s over, I’m done. I’ve lost interest.
Pretty sure she’s right.
I’m also scared of what comes after the chase. I’ve never stuck around long enough to find out.
“You couldn’t be so lucky,” Hayden says with a laugh. When she notes my wounded look, her laughter dies. “I wasn’t meaning it in a bad way, Gracie. It’s just—whenever that big perv finds the woman he falls in love with, he’s going to lavish her with so much attention, it’s going to be unreal.”
“You really believe that?” I can’t imagine Caleb in love with anyone.
Just like I can’t see it for myself either.
“I do,” she says with a nod. “He’s the type to fall hard. It’s because he’s in complete denial of his feelings. He thinks he’s incapable of love.”
“What? He told you that?” I’m in shock.
“No, I’m just making assumptions, though he’s given me little clues. And Tony’s told me things. Caleb is scared of his future. He thinks it’s going to be boring.”
“Caleb is the furthest thing from boring,” I say with a little snort.
“Right? I know. But he truly believes he’s going to simply settle for everything in life in the future, so why not live it up now?” Hayden shakes her head. “His logic is troublesome.”
“I’ll say.”
The server chooses that moment to ask if we need refills and I let Hayden talk to her, the two of them carrying on a conversation as if they know each other while I sit with my thoughts.
Caleb thinks he’s boring? And that he’s going to end up settling for a mediocre life? This doesn’t sound like the Caleb I know. Why should he have to settle for anything? He can be whatever he wants—and whoever he wants—if he so chooses. Who convinced him that he can’t?
This thought leads to more thoughts, and makes me realize I definitely need to approach him before I just show up at Mitchell’s Landing screaming out, “Surprise!” when I see him.
He deserves to know.
Three
Caleb
I’m kicking it in my room, exhausted. Freshly showered. Jerked off in the shower too because why not. Work kicked my ass today and I’m ready to crash. I’ve got my AirPods in my ears and I’m listening to some jams with my eyes closed. My ceiling fan on high because even though it’s only early June, it’s hot as balls outside and the air conditioning in this apartment is subpar.
At least it works, so I shouldn’t complain.
I’m drifting, thinking about absolutely nothing when there’s a light knock on my door. I crack my eyes open, staring at the fan in the semi-darkness of my room. The blinds are closed but there’s a light outside shining directly into my room. All night long.
Fucking sucks.
There’s another knock, followed by a whispery voice.
“Caleb? Are you awake?”
Oh fuck. It’s Gracie.
I sit up, shoving my fingers through my damp hair to push it into place before I yank my AirPods out of my ears. “Yeah, come in.”
The door slowly creaks open and she’s standing in the doorway, the light from her open bedroom door across the hall casting her in a silhouette. And what a silhouette it is. The girl has a bangin’ body. I kind of can’t get over it. I think it’s her legs. They’re so damn long. Like, how long would it take me to kiss every square inch of them, huh? Hours, probably. What would it feel like to have them wrapped around me tight while I fucked her hard?
Pretty damn good, I’d bet.
“Were you sleeping?” she asks as she takes me in.
“Trying to,” I admit. May as well keep it honest between us.
“Oh.” She leans against the doorjamb, still watching me. Making me feel a little weird having her stare at me while I’m sitting in bed with just my boxers on. At least my comforter is draped over my lap so she can’t see anything. Not that I’m ashamed or whatever, but I gotta keep the mystery going, ya know? “Can I talk to you? It can wait if you’re too tired.”
“No, come in. Sit down.” I wave a hand toward my empty desk chair before I lean over and click on the lamp on my bedside table.
She glances around my room when the light switches on, curiosity all over her pretty face. She’s taking it all in while I sit up in bed with a yawn, covering my mouth at the last second when I feel her gaze land on me.
“Your room is clean,” she says, sounding surprised.
“I’m not a complete slob.”
“No, you’re not.” She settles into the chair, her gaze never straying from mine. It’s like she’s looking into my eyes on purpose. As if she can’t look at anything else for fear of being distracted. Or maybe that’s me being hopeful that my bare chest gets her going. “I need to talk to you about something.”
I brace myself, prepared for the worst. Girls make statements like that, and it always brings bad news. Something I don’t want or need. “What is it?” I ask warily.
“Well, I got a job.” She leans forward, her elbows resting on her knees, and my gaze drops—directly to her tits. Not that they’re hanging out, but she does have a tank top on, and I can see the smooth skin of her chest, the pale pink lace of her bra, and the swell of her breasts against the lace.
Jerking my gaze from her chest, I stare into her eyes, checking for anger.
She doesn’t look angry. Nope, she looks…nervous?
Huh.
“Where at?” I ask, my imagination going wild. Maybe she’s going to work at a dispensary and has to warn me she can’t give her friends discounts no matter how much I beg—because that would be cool, having a dispensary discount for weed.
Or fuck, maybe it’s something worse. Maybe she’s going to become a drug runner or some shit. Talk about risky—Gracie wouldn’t do that. Oh wait, what if she’s about to drop the bomb that she’s gonna be a stripper? Girl could totally pull it off. I can only imagine her strutting out on a little stage in fuck me shoes with crystal stars covering her titties—
“Mitchell’s Landing,” she answers, ruining all the crazy possibilities running through my head.
“What? Get out of here. You’re going to work at the fountain, huh
?” Looks like she’s coming over to my turf, and I don’t have a problem with it. My first couple of summers working at Mitchell’s, I messed around with a lot of the fountain girls that worked there at the time. Too many of them, really.
After the end of my second summer—and an epic blowup between me and one of the girls, who just so happened to be a year older and taught me everything I needed to know about going down on a girl—I vowed to never mess around with someone I work with ever again. Even though there’s quite a bit of distance between the dock and the restaurant, it’s not enough when you got a pissed-off girl gunning for you every chance she gets.
Yeah. No more work hookups. They end in disaster.
“No, not the fountain.” Gracie slowly shakes her head, her gaze dropping to my chest. “On the dock,” she tells my abs.
Oh shit. “You’re going to be a dock girl?”
She rolls her eyes. “That is such an antiquated term. Isn’t there something better you can call my position?”
See how fired up she gets when I just make a simple statement? She’s got it out for me, I swear. Having her work with me is even more of a deterrent to not get with her. I don’t need Gracie going into ferocious beast-mode and come gunning for me. “That’s what we call all the girls who work on the dock.”
“And what do they call you guys? The dock boys?” She lifts a brow and crosses her arms, on the defensive.
“Well…yeah.”
She drops her arms to her sides, her face falling. Reminding me of a deflated balloon. “Oh.”
“Yeah. Oh.” I scratch my chest, Gracie’s eyes following every movement of my hand. Hmm. “That’s cool, though. I can help you out with anything you need to know.”
“I appreciate that. Thanks,” she says, and I can tell she means it. I mean it too. I may give her endless shit, but I also like her. Gracie’s cool. She’s a straight up G—that’s what we like to call her, and she acts like it annoys her when we say that, but I don’t believe it. She has a good attitude and tolerates all of us, and we’re not easy. “I just—I wanted to tell you before you found out by me just showing up in a few days without warning.”
The Junior (College Years Book 3) Page 3