His face blanked.
She caught his expression and scrubbed a hand over her eyes. ‘Don’t look at me like that. It’s not you, it’s me.’ She chuffed. ‘I’m having a bad moment, that’s all.’
‘I understand.’
‘Do you? Because you can take a walk without freezing to death or being eaten. You know how to get food that isn’t delivered to your kitchen, and how to make whatever you need instead of one clicking next day delivery. I tried to make trousers, but I realised I can’t sew for shit.’ She knelt to snatch up the discarded hide and gather the broken bone shards. She balled the mess at her middle. ‘Forget it. It is what it is. How was the Hunt?’
‘Favourable,’ he said slowly, a little shocked at her outburst. ‘I bring you meat. A spurbeast taken in the midst of its mating season. Succulent and tender.’
‘But you sound unhappy.’ She frowned. ‘A problem shared is a problem halved.’
He shifted to squat with his back to the wall. ‘That is a lie. If I tell you and you have no answers the effect of the problem is doubled.’
‘Just tell me what happened, Bhyr.’
‘Many of the Horde are displeased with my commands to treat our human breeders with a gentle hand.’ He rubbed his brow, the persistent ache between his eyes increasing.
Indira set her ruined project aside. ‘Why?’
‘It is rude to question a male’s care of his property.’
‘I remember.’ She pushed both hands through her mane. ‘It’s the reason you gave for not helping Ella.’
‘I am not exempt from that unspoken rule. By advising the warriors of what they should and should not do…. No, I did not advise. I commanded them to curtail the punishment of their breeders and to treat them with kindness. By doing so, I crossed a line.’
‘You cross a lot of lines. Usually, it doesn’t bother you much. Why does this?’
‘I may set Laws but it is my personal store of honour which convinces males to follow my lead.’ He stood to pace. ‘You have law makers on your planet, yes?’
‘We do. I worked for one.’
‘Did your lawmaker tell you how to mate your one time acts? What food to eat? How to dress? What roads to take?’
‘No,’ she replied slowly. ‘There are laws that she upholds and brings to parliament to be voted on, but the things you describe are everyday decisions that were mine alone to make, even if they were made within the structure already built by the society I chose to live in.’
‘It is the same here.’
She snorted.
Bhyr clicked in irritation. ‘There are Laws set down countless aeons before my birth that I uphold. I declare new Laws I believe will benefit our species long after I die, such as the allowance of alien breeders to stave off extinction. I may stand before the Horde and announce a new Law or change an old Law, but that is not to say they will like it or respect it. Males protest. Some may Challenge me for my place.’
‘Challenge you? You mentioned this before.’ Her head cocked. ‘Would a vote be held to replace you?’
‘No. The First’s word is Law. There is no voting.’ He sniffed at the primitive concept. ‘Challenge is single-combat between any of the Horde, regardless of rank.’
She straightened. ‘You’re talking about a duel?’ Her gaze shot to his, lips parting. ‘To the death?’ She paled when he nodded. ‘That’s how you decide your leaders?’
‘A most civilised method.’
‘Let’s agree to disagree.’
He nodded solemnly at her great display of wisdom. ‘Challenge does not always end in death. There is a method of punishment called exile. If a male Challenges another and loses, it is at the victor’s discretion if the loser dies or suffers shunning.’ He sighed. ‘One such Challenge occurred during the Hunt. Bihter requested the male be exiled. I agreed.’
‘So what’s the problem?’
Bhyr continued to pace.
How to explain what should have been a straightforward Challenge felt like the beginning of something larger?
Something dangerous.
‘I dislike treating the males of my Horde with a heavy hand, however, there must be discipline. Guidance. I also dislike the idea human females suffer needlessly under my rule.’ It left a bad taste in his mouth, an itch under his skin. ‘I went to the Hunt expecting to shock them with my requests, but the younger warriors are already giving their females more attention and care than the elder warriors deem proper.’
She crossed her arms. ‘Not all of them.’
‘No. Not all. There are those who push the outer limits of what behaviour even the Law finds acceptable.’ He huffed. ‘What I find acceptable.’ He glanced at her. ‘Arj Wyrm was one those, as you know.’
‘Was?’ A hopeful note entered her voice.
‘He is the Exile I spoke of.’
She rocked back. ‘I prefer peaceful methods, but I won’t lie and say that news doesn’t bring me satisfaction.’ She moved closer. ‘As for the others like him, can’t you talk to them individually? Convince them to treat their women better without others watching on to confuse the issue?’
‘I must bring the Horde to a different manner of thinking as a functional whole and not as individuals, or it won’t take. It will take considerable time.’ He shook his head, frustrated. ‘Delay might mean the death of more human females from abuse and neglect. You are dissimilar to Aztekan females, not only in physiology but in temperament, mentality and instincts. You humans will not survive if treated the same.’
‘I agree.’ Indira leaned forward. ‘I don’t mean to cast aspersions, Bhyr, but they’re in this situation because of you.’
‘I will do what I must.’
‘Great. I’ll help you.’
‘No.’ He returned to his place by the wall, sliding down until he sat. ‘I am First. I will find a way on my own.’
Indira joined him. ‘I’m here if you need me. Just ask. I’m a good sounding board.’ Drawing her knees into her chest, she lay her head down. ‘It’s what I do. Did. Back on Earth.’
Shaking his head, he turned his mind to more pleasurable pursuits. ‘I have a gift for you.’
‘I won’t say no to a present.’ She extended a palm.
‘A different kind of gift.’ Bhyr took her hand and nipped the side of her forefinger. ‘Kov Ohx will be here any moment to deliver it.’
‘Ooh. Mysterious.’ She leaned over to press her lips to his, and he felt her smile.
Half a span later, her playful curiosity turned into hard-eyed suspicion. ‘I was promised a gift. So why is that hulk looming over me with a needle of neon liquid?’
Ohx rumbled, amused. ‘It is not poison, female, but a plasma that will ease the assimilation of the transmitter to your neurological systems.’
‘What will this transmitter do to me exactly?’
‘It is a holosphere,’ Bhyr replied, guiding her to sit. She resisted. ‘It will assist you in learning Vøtkyrnai and you may contact your human female companions.’
Mouth popping open, she straightened. ‘Oh. The hologram thing you use?’ Her smile made his entire world bright. ‘Thank you, Bhyr. That’s surprisingly considerate.’
Her face fell when Ohx stepped closer. She sat and closed her eyes. As he leaned in, she tensed and leaned back.
He chuckled.
‘Sorry. I can’t help myself.’ She cringed. ‘Go ahead.’
This time she leaned so far back, the stool rocked.
Clicking in amusement, Bhyr ducked in on her other side to bite her earlobe. ‘Stay.’
She laughed, relaxing.
Ohx sank the needle behind her ear. ‘Done.’ He swiped away a drop of scarlet blood. ‘I programmed the device before implantation.’ He glanced at Bhyr as he packed. ‘She has access to the intergalactic streams.’
‘Good.’ Bhyr shook his head as the male rushed from the nest, eager to return to his human and offer the same gift.
‘Something wrong?’ Indira prodded her new tender
spot.
‘Kov Ohx was a quiet male. He kept to himself and it was rare that he spoke. Since he gained his human breeder, I have seen a lighter side to his nature. It is strange.’
‘Ha. From what I could tell, he thinks the same about you. He kept giving you funny looks.’
Bhyr made a thoughtful noise.
Ohx’s discomfort took on a new dimension.
‘He’s smitten,’ Indira said. ‘I don’t know her that well, and I have a feeling Ashleigh would cause a fuss before she admitted it, but she’s smitten, too. Humans call it falling in love. He seems lighter because he’s happier.’
‘Falling in love.’ He thought on it. ‘I dislike that.’
‘I’m shocked.’ Indira rolled her eyes. ‘Are you going to teach me how to use this thing?’
‘Yes.’ He paused. ‘I would rather grow into love with you. A thing might grow forever. Falling? There is only so far to fall before you reach a painful end.’ Bhyr glanced at his female. ‘Are you hurt? Why do your eyes leak?’
‘What? No. Shut up.’
Part III
Bait
23
Indira
I studied my busy holosphere, pleased I had gained speed and efficiency when practicing the glyph exercises. Learning to read Vøtkyrnai already improved my understanding of Bhyr and the Azteka legal system.
Soon I’d be able to read the books Bhyr treated like relics. It was also a relief to have something to do other than eating, sleeping and fucking.
Stretched out on the mossy floor, I munched on a snack. The shelled nuts were a pale orange dotted with green and bland tasting. Globs of dried fruit sweetened the mix. It was like eating a bowl of muesli that fizzed on your tongue. Bhyr said the bubbles were by-products of enzymes in my saliva reacting with the food, harmless, so I took him at his word and tried to enjoy the sensation. Seeds he’d sprinkled into the mix tasted chalky, cutting through the gingery foam, but he insisted they were crucial to my diet. As I kept resisting his feedings, he demanded I eat the food he provided to balance my nutrition. I couldn’t argue when it concerned my health, but still debated tossing the seeds down the toilet hole.
I flicked through a series of exercises I’d done before, freshening my memory.
The flat thud of feet echoed through the nest.
I paused the program, listening. The noisy entrance was out of place, as Bhyr moved as silent as a ghost, but I didn’t think it was a stranger.
Anybody entering the nest unannounced would have to be okay with having their face ripped clean off their skull. So Bhyr explained after I expressed a worry over the lack of a closable barrier between me and the monsters beyond it.
He trudged into the room, a face full of thunder.
‘That’s quite the look you’ve got going.’ I bounced into my feet, reaching for him.
He brushed past me.
Arms dropping to my sides, I crossed them under my breasts. ‘Hello to you, too.’
A black glare silenced me.
He sat on his stool and stared at nothing, a sculpture chiseled by Rodin.
Exasperated by his brooding, I shrugged. I folded my legs and sat at his feet.
Eyeing his bent head, I considered throwing nuts at it. Hm. It would be mean, and I wasn’t in the mood to bicker.
He’d called another Hunt to measure how far along his efforts swayed members of his Horde into accepting human liberation. It had not gone as well as he’d hoped and he’d been pissed ever since.
I wished he’d let me help.
I knew how to be a support system. How to make things run smooth. He ignored what I offered, and it was not only lacking in foresight but frustrating. I grew tired of pretending his blind spot over my skills didn’t matter. Tired of making myself smaller to fit into his one-dimensional view of people with vaginas.
I leaned back on my palms and thought about things as they stood. ‘You know, I was furious at you for abducting me. Furious. I’m still mad the way you treat me. The way your warriors treat the other women. Like we’re stupid and less than you because we’re female and human.’
His head twisted towards me.
‘I fought you as hard as possible when I first got here. I thought if I did, I’d get to go home. Get back my old normal. But how could I? I’m not the same. I’ve seen what’s out here now. If I went back, I wouldn’t fit. Still, I wanted to bury my grandfather.’
My breathing hitched, my eyes watered.
The pain was hideous.
‘He’s gone,’ I said when Bhyr opened his mouth to speak. Nothing he said would make it bearable. ‘I’m here and that’s not changing. Crazy as it sounds, I don’t want it to.’ I glanced at him. ‘I wasn’t okay before, but now, I’ve adjusted.’
‘Indira.’
I shut my eyes. He said my name, or looked at me, and I couldn’t think. ‘I kept fantasising what my life would be like if you hadn’t forced yourself into it.’ I huffed. ‘Would I have achieved my goals? Maybe.’ I sighed. My eyes opened and focused on him. ‘There’s you now, and serious work needs doing here. Good work. Speculating about what might have been back on Earth? It’s pointless. I’ve got to let it go.’
Feeling freer than I had even before my abduction, I considered closing the space between us to kiss him.
My stupid heart fluttered.
Bhyr’s role as First skewed everything about him.
With each insight into his world and the more of his inner self he let me see, I realised he did his best for his people, and did it the way his father taught him. It didn’t make my abduction right. It didn’t absolve him of the lives taken and lost during his frantic attempt to save his Horde. But it let me understand the nature of his struggle and reevaluate my own.
What happened to me was awful.
There were worse fates.
Time passed, and the intensity of my captivity faded. I bemoaned the circumstances which led me to him, but rose above the anger. The future would be whatever I made it.
‘Do you know what?’ I asked, keeping my voice light.
He left his gloomy perch and hunkered between my legs.
With a glance at my expression, he grabbed my thighs to deliver his rough, artless caresses. ‘I do not know what.’ His voice was quiet, defeated, even.
I clamped my knees around his hips. ‘I want to be here with you.’
His focus on his kneading palms switched to my face.
‘There’s a syndrome out there with my name on it, but I don’t care. I’m in this. All the way. Whatever you do, I’ll back you. Wherever you are is where I want to be.’ I hesitated when he stared, shocked. ‘Okay?’
‘You will stay with me? You want to stay with me?’
‘That’s what I’m saying.’
‘Here? Willingly?’
I laughed. ‘Where else? And yes.’
He looked so suspicious.
My mouth twisted to hide a smile. ‘I’m not trying to trick you, Bhyr.’
‘You will stay here with me as my mate,’ he checked.
‘I trust my instincts. They’re telling me you’re mine.’
Bhyr moved with caution, as if I’d bolt if he went too fast. He cupped my chin, thumb claw pressing into my bottom lip. The thin skin dimpled. ‘You forgive me for what I did? For taking you as my breeder?’
I leaned forward to press my temple to the hollow of his throat. I couldn’t hear his heart past his exoskeleton, but pulses of heat warmed my skin.
I felt safe when I was with him.
When did that happen?
‘I forgive you, Bhyr.’ Pulling back, I smiled. ‘Not to be high and mighty about it, but when a person doesn’t deserve forgiveness is when they need it most. Babi taught me that. I’m strong enough to forgive you. I have to be for my sake. If I’m not, then what’s the point in anything that’s happened to me? Us?’
He blinked, eyes huge.
‘You know what else?’ I carried on matter-of-fact. ‘You’re in this with me, too.’
‘Mmhm. You like me.’
Click-purring deep in his throat, he tickled the soft spots behind my knees, then leaned forward to feather his lips over my naked throat.
Breathless, I squirmed.
His voice was a low growl. ‘I do enjoy looking at you.’
I flicked my hair over my shoulder, arching my back and striking a pose. I gave him my best side. ‘Don’t I look good?’
Plenty of fresh air, food never exposed to pesticides or preservatives, water unsullied by sentient hands, and countless hours of gentle sun had smoothed my brown skin to airbrushed perfection.
My hair shone with vitality and my flesh glowed with optimal health.
I was the best version of me he’d ever get.
His laughter rumbled through me. ‘Yes, and I?’ He straightened. His chin lifted, eyes lit with amusement, but tight around the corners.
Lying back, I dragged my gaze over his body.
A familiar throb between my thighs had me rolling my hips. ‘Hm.’ My palms wandered down my stomach, daring him to mimic the sensual touch. ‘I don’t know.’ I tapped a finger over my bellybutton to watch him eye it in faint disgust then crooked that finger at him. ‘Come closer, so I can see better.’
Confidence gone, his mouth twisted, gaze wary.
Even seven foot warrior aliens had anxiety.
I abandoned my original plan. ‘Come here.’ I slipped a hand around his nape as I curled up. I kissed him full on the mouth then stroked my tongue across it.
He jerked, squeezing my legs until I wiggled them to remind him I needed those bones unbroken to walk.
I grinned against his lips.
‘My warrior.’ I rubbed at the scars slashed along the steel-boned corset of his abdominals. ‘My strong Bhyr.’
His chest puffed, arms flexing as they dragged me into an awkward embrace shy of rib-crushing.
Bhyr Page 21