by L. Danvers
Or... I thought I did, at least.
I was sitting here, trusting in magic and vampires and all of these wild stories I was being told. But I hadn’t actually seen any of it. For all I knew, the mirror thing could be a trick. Maybe Ben was some tech wizard and had managed to pull up a video chat on a device that was designed to look like a mirror—and Danielle was just in some house on the other side of town.
I needed proof.
I needed a reason to believe what I was being told was true.
Pictures weren’t cutting it. Even videos could be edited. I needed hard evidence.
Letting out a deep breath as I worked up my nerve, I got back to my feet and went back inside the house. Xander, Aiden and Ben were waiting for me, crowded around the kitchen which was right beside the foyer.
“How do I know any of this is true?” I asked, placing my hands on my hips. “How do I know this isn’t some elaborate prank or that you aren’t just psychopaths toying with me? How do I know these two are really vampires?”
The three men exchanged knowing looks amongst themselves. Ben, shaking his head at what he was about to do, held out his arm. Aiden’s face contorted, and his lips curled back as fangs ripped through his gums. I took a reflexive step back. I knew I’d asked to see it. I just hadn’t thought through how I’d handle it if I confirmed that I was standing in a room with two vampires. Aiden took Ben’s wrist and held it in front of him, eyeing it with pure bloodlust.
“Better not,” Xander said, placing his hand on his brother’s shoulder. “Uncle Ben’s got the synthetic stuff in the fridge if you need to top yourself off.” He looked at me before explaining, “He has no self-control when it comes to feeding off of humans.” He flashed a wicked smile, teeth bared, before sinking his fangs into Ben’s flesh. Ben gave an instinctive grunt, his face contorting into a grimace. Xander quickly pulled away, and Ben cupped his hand around his wrist, looking at me as if to say do you believe me now?
I did. I believed every word.
But this didn’t make me feel any better.
I blinked, trying to think, as I watched Xander wipe the blood from the corners of his lips.
If they were really vampires, was I really a witch? I glanced down at my own hands, rotating them back and forth.
“Any word from your friend?” Ben asked Aiden. “About how to get Grace’s memories back?”
“Starla refuses to talk to me. She was adamant that she wants nothing to with interfering with the Albrights’s business.”
Xander propped his elbows on Ben’s counter while he fiddled with the salt shaker. “I can have the Book Slayers look into it.”
“The Book Slayers?” I asked.
“Some librarians I turned into vampires a while back. They love researching this kind of stuff. They’ll be happy to help.” His eyes caught mine, and he added, “Plus, they’re your friends, too.”
Oh. More supernatural friends... Who knew I was so popular?
Aiden’s phone rang. “It’s Victoria,” he announced. He stepped aside to speak with her privately.
“Another friend of mine?” I asked, taking a few steps closer to Ben and Aiden.
“She’s Aiden’s wife,” Ben explained. “A human, if you were wondering.”
“Another blood slave?”
“No, no. The whole Choosing Ceremony thing went out the window when word of the competition spread to other vampire kingdoms. Victoria was the love of Aiden’s life.”
“Was?”
“It’s a long story,” he said, suggesting he’d explain it another time.
“And she doesn’t mind that he’s a vampire?”
Xander turned around and leaned against the counter, folding his arms across his chest. “Well, he was a vampire when they first met. Then he became a human again when our werewolf brother bit him.”
“Right. Julian?” I guessed.
He nodded.
“But if he’s a human, how did he—?”
“He gave it up to save us. He had one of the Book Slayers give him his blood, and then Uncle Ben let Aiden feed from him.” So that’s how people turned into vampires. Grinning, Xander patted Ben on the back. But based on the look on Ben’s face, it was a memory he’d rather forget.
I couldn’t believe that Aiden had given up a life as a human to help save me. I mean, Xander was probably the real reason behind it. He was his brother, after all. But still...
All this time, I thought that I had no one in this world who cared about me.
And all this time, they’d been looking for me.
Moments later, Aiden returned. He explained that he was going to head back home to be with his wife. There was something she needed to discuss with him.
“Is she upset about you turning?” Xander asked.
“No. Something unrelated. She said it wasn’t an over-the-phone conversation, though.”
Xander eyed his brother questioningly. “How do you feel about it? Being a vampire again, I mean.”
Aiden shrugged. “I’ve been a vampire most of my life. I have to admit, it beats my muscles aching all the time. It is what it is for now. When we get Julian back, I’ll have him bite me again. And then Victoria and I can get back to being perfectly ordinary humans.” He winked.
My chest caved. From what they told me, all of this hinged on me finding a way to unseal that portal. And I had no memory of ever using magic before.
“You really think that’ll work?” Xander asked his brother.
Aiden smiled. “Why wouldn’t it?” He jerked his head toward me. “And anyway, I’ve seen what this one’s capable of. I have no doubt she’ll get that portal open again.”
I forced a smile. It was nice that he had so much faith in me.
But I feared I was giving them false hope...
Grace
I missed Bellamy so much it hurt. I didn’t have my phone, which meant that I didn’t have his number. The thought of him thinking I had flaked out on him while he was recovering from an injury killed me.
Now that Ben had told me everything, he’d offered to take me back to Amber Falls. He even told me he could have Xander compel away my memories of the past day.
But my memories had already been tampered with once. And how could I walk away now that I knew I had people who cared about me? And that I had a family?
I had to know more.
Truth be told, I probably could have asked Ben if I could borrow his cell and looked up the number for Bellamy’s bar. But even if I did, what was I supposed to tell him? Hey, Bellamy. You’re the perfect boyfriend, and I know you’re recovering from a terrifying attack, but I’m going to hang out with some vampires and witches in Quarter Square for a bit.
No. He’d think I’d lost my mind.
Instead, I decided to write him a letter. It would be easier that way. I could tell him everything I needed him to know—without leaving a return address. I didn’t want him to come looking for me. He didn’t need to get tangled up in this supernatural mess I had apparently been in the middle of. I could send it to his work, figuring it would get to him.
Letting out a sigh, I sat down to write.
Dear Bellamy,
Do you remember when I told you I felt like I was living someone else’s life? Well, as it turns out, in a way... I was. Someone from my past got ahold of me. I can’t explain why, but I had to leave town on short notice. It’s a long story, and I promise I’ll share it with you one day. But this letter isn’t about that.
I’m writing to tell you that I’m sorry. I’m sorry that I left you. I’m sorry that I can’t tell you why.
I promise I never had any intention of hurting you.
I promise it was nothing you did or didn’t do.
I promise that I’m okay.
You don’t need to come looking for me. You don’t need to wait for me. There is something important that I have to do, and it may take some time.
In the meantime, just know that I care about you deeply.
I’m sorry
for the mess I made. I hope that one day I can explain everything to you and that you’ll understand. And maybe even forgive me.
-Grace
I read the letter over a thousand times. Part of me wanted to crumple it up into a ball and chuck it in the trash. But even though it wasn’t perfect, I knew there was no right way to tell your boyfriend that you were ditching town and couldn’t tell him why.
He would hate me after this.
But I had to figure out a way to get all of my memories back. I had to track down my birth family. And I had to find a way to unseal a portal to a faerie realm.
But I couldn’t do that if I knew doing so would potentially put Bellamy in harm’s way. He was human. And he deserved a normal life.
And anyway, I had a feeling he wouldn’t like the idea of dating a witch.
Things were better this way. Maybe if I kept telling myself that I’d start believing it.
I waved my hands in front of my eyes, trying to fan them to keep from crying. Lower lip quivering, I folded the letter and slid it inside the envelope. I scribbled the address on it, added a stamp and then handed it over to Ben. He dipped his head, acknowledging the inner torment I felt, and headed outside to stick it in the mailbox.
Meanwhile, Xander was reclining in Ben’s La-Z-Boy with his hands folded behind his head. “Finish your letter to your boyfriend?” he asked, his voice tinged with emotions I couldn’t quite decipher.
“Yeah,” I said, hugging my arms around myself. I felt sick to my stomach. Bellamy was the last person in the world I ever wanted to hurt. I couldn’t bear the thought of imagining what he’d think of me when he read it. I glanced at the clock that hung over the front door. He was probably worried sick by now. He’d probably tried my cell a hundred times. And had no doubt called the Sunny Side Grille, too. I wondered what Madison would think...
Xander looked like he had something else on his mind, but he held his tongue. “I was thinking we could head to my bookstore.”
I snorted. “You own a bookstore?” Here I was on the verge of tears, but the thought of this ancient vampire owning a bookstore of all things made me laugh. He didn’t strike me as a bookworm.
“Is that funny?”
I shrugged. “No, just unexpected.”
Ignoring my comment entirely, he continued, “The Book Slayers work on the second floor. I thought it might be good for you to meet them. There are a bunch of grimoires there, too. I’m hoping maybe they can help you remember how to use magic.”
“Are they witches, too?”
“No, but they’ve read the books a hundred times. If anyone can help you, it’s them.”
I scrunched my nose, remembering an earlier conversation we’d had. “Why don’t you just call my brother? Nick, was it?”
Ben walked back inside, soaking wet. “It’s raining,” he announced, wiping his hands on the blue kitchen towel that had been sitting on the counter. “In case you were wondering.”
“Anyway,” Xander went on, “the problem is that we still don’t have your old phone. So, we don’t have a way to call Nick.”
That was a bummer. I had been looking forward to learning more about him. “What about my dad? You said he was in charge of a coven, right?”
Xander and Ben shot quick looks at one another, and I could tell there was something that they weren’t telling me. “What?” I asked. “What is it?”
Xander shook his head.
Realizing what that strange look in his eyes was implying, I blurted out, “He’s dead, isn’t he?” My world felt like it had imploded. One second, I finally had a family. Even if he was a complete jerk, he was my father. And I had hoped to meet him. I had so many questions for him. And now, I’d never get any answers. Lowering my head, I asked, “How’d he die?”
“Uh, that’s a story for another day, I’m afraid,” Xander said, clasping his hands as he stood up from the seat.
“Xander,” Ben interjected. “Don’t you think she—?”
Xander silenced him with a look. “Say another word, and I swear I’ll kill you.” His eyes narrowed. “No. Better yet, I’ll turn you.”
Ben rolled his eyes at that.
“You think I’m kidding?”
I stood there, gaping. Why didn’t Xander want me to know what happened to my father? I wanted to press him further, but if he was willing to kill his own family, what was he willing to do to me?
I decided I didn’t want to find out.
Reading the emotions on my face, Xander took a step closer to me. “I’ll tell you when you’re ready. I swear. Just trust me on this, okay?”
For people who were complete strangers to me, they sure did ask me to trust them a lot. But then, I remembered that we did, in fact, have a history together. So, even though current-me was wary of the whole family, old-me not only trusted them but cared about them. I didn’t have to have faith in them. I had to have faith in her. In myself.
Xander
Thunder thrashed in the cool night air as sheets of rain pummeled from the sky. With an umbrella in my other hand, I pulled open the door to Books & Brews. Grace and Uncle Ben went inside, and I followed after them. Jasper, one of the Book Slayers who helped look after the shop, was busy restocking the thrillers shelf when he looked up to greet us. Startled, he hurried over. Trying not to draw too much attention from the customers, he greeted us. Flipping his wavy brown hair away from his eyes, he stuffed his hands in his pockets. “Xander?” he said under his breath, hardly believing his eyes. “How are you?”
“I’m still here, aren’t I?” I said with a wink as I squeezed his shoulder. “Thank you for coming to my rescue, by the way.”
He nodded, and then his eyes drifted toward Grace. He immediately wrapped her in a hug. Jasper and Grace had hit it off pretty well. Aside from me and Danielle, he had become one of her closest friends. “Grace!” he said, squeezing her hard. “I missed you so much.” He had a lot of questions for her, but he bit his tongue, not wanting the human customers to overhear. Realizing that she hadn’t spoken a word, he pulled away. “Grace?”
She blinked at him, and it hit me then that she didn’t remember him at all. I took a step forward and gestured between them. “Grace, this is Jasper.”
Bewilderment flashed across Jasper’s deep brown eyes, and he looked at me, waiting for an explanation. “She knows who I am... doesn’t she?” He looked like a wounded puppy. Well, more so than usual. He was shy by nature, but becoming a vampire helped him settle into himself. After all, he’d had plenty of time to grow into his own skin. He had an innocent look about him, which was one of the reasons I’d picked him to man the front of the shop. He was approachable. And, given the way he chose to live his life, he was mostly harmless. Still, Grace was one of the few people he opened up to outside of the Book Slayers—and, of course, me.
Growing impatient with my lack of an immediate explanation, he looked back at Grace. His mouth stretched into a wide smile, wrinkling his whole face. “You’re messing with me, aren’t you?” he said, wagging his finger at her.
She frowned. “I’m sorry,” she said, without much emotion behind it given that she had no idea who he was. “I seem to have forgotten a lot lately.”
I dipped my head in appreciation for her remembering not to openly discuss any of our supernatural business in front of the customers.
Jerking my head toward the bar, I told Jasper I could use a drink. On cue, Jasper asked Grace and Uncle Ben if they wanted anything and then promptly headed toward the bar to grab our drinks of choice.
I scanned the room, happy to see my bookshop-slash-bar booming with business. Uncle Ben thought it was strange for me to combine books and booze, but hey—who didn’t like to relax with a drink and a good book?
There was no point in us awkwardly waiting here, so I suggested we head upstairs. I motioned for Uncle Ben to lead the way, and I followed behind Grace. I shook my head as we walked, baffled by how much Grace’s memory loss had changed her. The Grace I knew was headstrong
and confident. But this version of her was... muted. I supposed it made sense. All of those negative experiences—being a blood slave, being dragged to the castle to partake in the Choosing Ceremony, learning her father was the infamous Reed Carlisle and then subsequently killing him in an epic battle changed her. They toughened her up. Hardened her. She was intense and fiery.
But without any memory of those events, there was this lightness to her that I’d never seen before. It was like this version of Grace was what she would have been like had her life been... good.
I wondered if it was wrong of me to take that from her by reintroducing her to her past.
And yet, the Grace I knew hated being compelled because she hated the idea of changing someone’s memories. It was like stealing from them. The Grace I knew would want her memories back, even if that meant bringing the pain back, too.
I still didn’t know how I was going to break it to her that she was the one who killed her father. I was hoping to avoid the topic and let her remember it on her own if and when the Book Slayers helped us figure out how to restore her memories.
When we finally reached the top of the staircase, we slipped inside the common room where the Book Slayers spent much of their time. Melissa was the first to sense our presence, and in a flash, she was standing before us, squeezing her book in excitement. Before she got ahead of herself, though, I explained the situation to her. The other Book Slayers gathered around to hear. They were furious that the Albrights had taken so much from us. But they vowed then and there to help get to the bottom of how to restore Grace’s memories.
By the time I’d finished my spiel, Jasper had caught up with us. He brought a martini for me, a margarita for Grace and a cabernet for Uncle Ben. We chatted with the Book Slayers for a while as we sipped from our drinks.
But then, it was time to begin.
Being the daughter of Reed Carlisle and being a twin born of his coven meant that she was powerful. Crazy powerful.
Perhaps having her perform some spell would remind her of who she really was.
And maybe that would be the key to bringing back her memories.