by L. Danvers
“Grace, he let you go, didn’t he? He could have ratted you out to the others, but he didn’t. And anyway, he saw what his dad was doing to you.”
“And he made his choice,” I snapped. “He chose Reed. Not me. He only helped me because you made him.”
Xander was quiet for some time. Part of me wished he would say something to give me an excuse to snap at him. To get some of this anger out.
I replayed the evening’s events over and over again in my mind, torturing myself. I leaned my head against the window, staring out into the starry abyss. Saying goodbye to Danielle was going to be hard enough. Now I had guilt layered on top of it. And the memories of what I’d done.
I woke up in a cold sweat, panting, shivering. My heart felt like it was going to explode. Panicked, I looked around. It was dark, though a yellow haze from the streetlights slanted through the windows.
I relaxed when I realized I was in my apartment.
It was just a nightmare.
Or was it a memory?
I pressed my fingertips to my temple, taking shallow breaths.
I tried putting the bits and pieces of the dream together, but they were already slipping from my mind. All I could remember was the feeling of utter devastation over something I had done. But what could I have done that was so bad?
I remembered, too, the care and concern in Xander’s eyes. Like we had been close once. I mean, like, close. There was a gentleness about him. A warmth...
I didn’t remember him looking at me like that in the last couple of weeks. Mostly, I seemed to be getting on his nerves. He’d been nice enough—or nice for him, from what I gathered. Yet...
Who was I to him? And who was he to me?
I shook my head. It didn’t matter. It was just a dream. And after time away playing witch, I was finally back in Amber Falls. I knew I had a lot of explaining to do to my boss. I hoped I could get my job back. But that could wait a day or two.
First, I had to find Bellamy.
IT WAS CHILLIER THAN I’d expected. I regretted not thinking to grab a sweater before I left. I hugged my arms around myself, shivering. The morning sun was peeking over the horizon, casting the sky in brilliant orange and yellow tones. It was breathtaking, and yet my chest caved with sadness as I stood outside Bellamy’s apartment. I thought back to my first date with him. I thought back to our first kiss. I longed to see him look at me the way he’d looked at me that night. I was terrified to face him. Terrified to see the disappointment, the anger, in his eyes.
But I had to apologize after what I’d put him through.
“Grace?” his familiar, raspy voice called out from behind.
I whirled around, bracing myself for whatever harsh words he may be ready to unleash on me—I deserved them all.
But instead, he ran toward me and wrapped me in a bear hug. “Where have you been? I’ve been looking everywhere for you.”
He pulled away just far enough to look down at me, and my eyes swelled with tears. “Did you get my letter?”
“Yes, but there was no return address. And you weren’t answering your phone. I’ve been worried sick about you.”
I chewed my lip, overwhelmed with emotion. “Aren’t you mad at me?”
“No,” he said emphatically, shaking his head in disbelief. He drew me back in for another hug. “No, I’m just glad you’re okay.” He rested his chin on top of my head.
Feeling safe in his embrace, I said the words that had been weighing on me. “I’m so sorry for leaving you.”
“You said in the letter that someone from your past came back into the picture...”
“Yes.”
“An ex?” he asked, and I wondered how long that question had been spinning in his mind.
“No, not at all.”
He paused for a moment. “Did you take care of whatever needed to be taken care of?”
I let out a sigh. No, I hadn’t. Because I had been referring to opening that portal. But instead, I’d abandoned my once-friends without so much as saying goodbye. Because I was scared. Scared of becoming like the monsters from the storybooks. Scared of becoming like the Albright witches or the werewolves or the vampires. Scared of how powerful I might become if I stayed in Quarter Square. And scared of who I might have to hurt along the way in order to get the others out of that faerie realm.
“Grace?” he asked again, pulling me back into reality.
“Not exactly,” I said, burying my face into his chest. “It was all too much.” I knew I was being vague and that wasn’t a real answer. But what was I supposed to say to him?
Suddenly, I felt stupid for running back into his arms.
Sure, Bellamy cared for me. Here he was, having every right to be furious with me, and he was hugging me. But would he still feel the same way if he knew the truth about me?
I wasn’t ready to find out.
And I didn’t want to be that girl anyway.
I wanted to be normal and forget everything that had happened.
“Hey—I’m going to let the others know you’re okay.” He pulled out his phone.
I nodded and found a spot under a maple tree to wait while he called Madison and Nathaniel. I ran my fingers through my hair, hoping I was doing the right thing. The realization that Ben had probably woken up by now and noticed I was gone occurred to me, but I had to push those thoughts away. I had to look out for myself and what was best for me.
And being here with Bellamy was what was best for me.
Before long, Bellamy was strolling down the sidewalk wearing a full-face smile. “I’m taking the day off,” he announced.
“Just like that?”
He snapped. “Just like that. Nathaniel suggested it.”
I smiled. “Thank you.”
“Now, how about we catch up over some coffee? I want to hear everything.”
Grace
“Just promise you won’t disappear on me like that again,” Bellamy said, his hazel eyes turning into half-moons. He sank into the metal chair, his spoon clanking as he mindlessly stirred his coffee. “I’m not the jealous type, and I’m so glad to know you’re safe. But I have to know... Where were you?”
He waited for an explanation. One I wasn’t ready to give. Not fully.
I bit into the warm chocolate-covered donut, buying myself a couple of seconds to think. I hated keeping secrets from Bellamy. I was going to be honest with him. Today. I just had to work up the courage first. He didn’t need to know everything—at least not yet. But perhaps I should give him a glimpse into the world I was an unwilling participant in. How could I even think of a future with this guy if I couldn’t be honest with him about who I really was?
“Grace?” he pressed.
“I was on a trip with a friend,” I said. Which was technically true.
His left eyebrow arched. “Oh?” I nodded, hoping that would satisfy him. But, of course, it didn’t. He shifted in his seat. “Which friend?”
“His name’s Ben. He lives in Quarter Square. He’s a travel blogger.” I cleared my throat, growing more uncomfortable with this conversation by the second. “I tagged along with him on a trip to Virginia.”
Again—technically true. Ben was a travel blogger, and I had been with him. But that had nothing to do with why we had gone there.
Bellamy’s brow relaxed. “Wait—wait, did you say he was a travel blogger? Are you talking about Ben Sullivan?”
“Yeah. You know him, too?”
“Not exactly, but Nathaniel’s mom is a huge fan of his,” he said, shaking his head at the coincidence. “She knew him back in high school and has been following his blog for years.”
I scratched the back of my neck. “Small world.”
“So, why are you and Ben going on trips together? He’s old enough to be your dad. You two aren’t—”
I suppressed a gag at the suggestion. “No. Not at all,” I shivered, trying to get that image out of my head.
“So, he’s the someone important from your past? I don’t
get it. What did he need you to do that was so urgent?”
I looked at the ceiling, hoping for a reasonable explanation to pop out of the air. I didn’t have one. So, here went the truth. “I’ve had this problem going on for a while. I should have told you sooner. But... There are entire years of my life that I can’t remember.”
He reached his hand across the table and placed it on top of mine. “Why didn’t you tell me sooner? Did you have a concussion or something?”
I shook my head. “I don’t know what happened. But Ben showed up, and he knew exactly who I was. Like, really knew me. I had no memory of him, but he had photos, videos, texts, all sorts of evidence that he and I had been like family once. I thought he might have answers about my past and that he might be able to fill in the gaps.”
Bellamy’s brow furrowed deeply as he tried to follow along. “Where did he take you?”
I shook my head, realizing the conclusions he was drawing. “You don’t have to worry about me, Bellamy. I can take care of myself.”
“How can I not worry?” He spoke softer now, leaning in as he spoke. “When you disappeared like that without so much as calling or texting, I was afraid—”
My gaze slid to the glass door as it burst open behind Bellamy. I immediately stiffened. It was Xander. He was storming into the café, jaw clenched.
He marched toward me, and I shifted in my seat. What was he doing here?
He spotted Bellamy and gave him the once-over. By the time he reached our table, he was stifling a mocking laugh. “This must be the boyfriend I’ve heard so little about.”
“I take it you two know each other?” Bellamy was now standing, his thumbs hooked through his belt loops. I nodded, so he offered Xander his hand. “Bellamy Mortimer.”
Xander left him hanging, eyeing him with suspicion. “Xander Dumont.” Xander slid his attention back toward me. “I need you to come with me.”
“I’m sorry I left without saying goodbye, but I can’t go back there,” I said, being purposefully vague since I hadn’t told Bellamy about the whole witch thing yet. “I’m not the same person you remember.”
“Grace,” Xander said through his teeth. “It’s Uncle Ben.”
“Whoa, whoa, whoa,” Bellamy said, holding his hands up. “Ben? Ben Sullivan is your uncle? I didn’t know he had any relatives in town.”
“My family’s full of secrets.” He winked at Bellamy, and then he took my arm. Lowering his voice, he said, “I’ll explain everything on the way. But I need you to trust me.”
Bellamy stepped forward, his hand now protectively resting on my lower back. “What you need is to get your hand off my girlfriend.”
“Listen. You need to back off.”
“And if I don’t?”
Xander’s dark eyes flashed, and the corner of his mouth pulled up into a wicked half-smile. “Then I’ll make you.”
Xander wasn’t stupid enough to bite him in a café. But he could compel him.
“It’s fine,” I interjected, shaking out of Xander’s hold. I turned my attention to Bellamy. “Xander’s a friend. Kind of.”
Xander placed his hand on his chest, feigning wounded pride.
Bellamy folded his arms across his broad chest in protest.
“We don’t have time for this,” Xander growled. “Grace—Uncle Ben’s in the hospital. And you need to come with me.”
My face slackened. “What?” I asked, taking a step back. “How did that happen? I was just with him last night.”
When he stole a glance at Bellamy, his jaw twitched. He didn’t offer up any explanation, but concern clouded his eyes. This couldn’t be a typical illness. Supernaturals were at play. That’s why he wasn’t giving any details in front of Bellamy. Bellamy would ask questions. And him asking questions about what happened would only lead to more questions. About Ben, Xander and me.
Now understanding his sense of urgency, I grabbed my jacket and slid it on, pulling my blonde hair out from under the collar. “Okay, let’s get going.”
Bellamy pushed his chair in. “I’ll go with you.”
“No, thanks,” Xander said, raising his palm to stop him. Xander cocked his head to the side. He took a step closer and peered down at Bellamy. “You’re not coming.” He didn’t have to raise his voice to sound threatening.
I shifted my weight, chewing the inside of my cheek. He was compelling him. And... I was letting him. What was I thinking? “Stop,” I asserted.
Xander looked at me over his shoulder, scowling. “He’s not coming.”
Growing frustrated, I pulled Bellamy aside.
“What’s going on here, Grace?” he asked.
“Look, I planned to tell you everything, but it’s going to have to wait. If Ben’s in trouble, I need to be there for him.”
He looked past me, staring Xander down. “I don’t trust that guy.”
“Then trust me,” I said. I felt like a jerk for playing that card. I’d vanished without a trace, leaving him to worry about me when he should have been focused on healing. And here I was now, leaving again. He had absolutely no reason to have any faith in me. “If something happened to Ben, I need to be there for him.”
“I do trust you, Grace.” He slid his hand around the small of my back and kissed my cheek. “Just don’t disappear on me again this time, okay?”
“I won’t,” I promised. I patted my pocket, frowning as I realized I still didn’t have a phone. “I lost my phone. I don’t know how long I’ll be gone, but you’ll be the first to know when I’m back. I’m sorry. I have to go.” I bit my lip as I walked past him and caught up with Xander.
Xander was shooting Bellamy daggers with his eyes. Hardly looking back at me, with a wave of his hand, he said, “After you.”
Xander
“Get in,” I said, opening the car door for her. I tried concealing the frustration in my voice, but I knew I was doing a crappy job.
I climbed into the driver’s seat and revved the engine.
“Look,” Grace said. “I know you’re worried about Ben, but I can do without the attitude. What’s your problem anyway? Why were you being such a jerk to Bellamy? He didn’t do anything wrong.”
My jaw clenched, and I gripped the steering wheel hard as I sped in the direction of Quarter Square. “I don’t like the way he looks at you.”
“Excuse me?”
“He looks at you like you’re some fragile doll. Some damsel in distress waiting for a knight in shining armor to come and rescue you.” I looked over at her, eyes blazing. “But you’re not some damsel, Grace. You’re a witch. And a powerful one, I might add. You’re a force to be reckoned with. If he can’t see that, he doesn’t deserve you.”
“Well,” she said contemplatively, “as someone who was locked in your castle at one time, I think it would have been rather nice for someone to have come to my rescue.”
I didn’t like what she was implying. “That was before... and anyway, I had no part in that.”
“And yet, you did nothing to stop it.”
I growled, growing more agitated by the second. I wasn’t going to have this conversation with her.
It was pointless.
The Grace I knew was gone.
Yes, every once in a while, bits of that fiery spirit would blaze through. But our entire history had been erased from her mind. Maybe the facts were there. But the emotions? Without those, our friendship meant nothing to her.
When I’d first heard Uncle Ben was in the hospital, my first thought, first fear, had been about Grace. The person who’d made the call didn’t have any information about her. I was afraid she was dead—or worse. It’d all been too convenient—me escaping the Albright compound and us tracking Grace down all without so much as a peep from Sofia Albright. I worried my worst fears had come true.
I’d rushed to the hospital in the middle of the night—though, technically, early morning was more like it. Uncle Ben had told me Grace was gone. He’d realized she’d left just before someone broke into his p
lace and attacked him. They beat him up, dragged him out of his home and left him for dead on the side of the road. He hadn’t told the investigators much—he didn’t want them snooping around his home with all of the grimoires and magical objects up there. And anyway, he didn’t know who had done this to him. But it didn’t take a genius to put two and two together.
It was Sofia Albright.
Or maybe Ruby Drake...
Either way, I’d offered to give him my blood to heal him and get him out of that awful hospital room, but he’d refused. He didn’t want to raise any suspicion.
I’d asked him if he had any idea what happened to Grace. He told me he suspected she’d freaked out after our encounter with the werewolf and had run back to Amber Falls.
He was right.
I just hadn’t expected to find her running into the arms of that Bellamy guy.
I didn’t know who Grace was anymore. But I knew that I needed her help.
Now, Grace Addington was nothing more than a means to an end.
Because I was going to get my siblings back. They were all I had left.
Grace
I didn’t understand what Xander’s problem was. Was this about me running away without saying goodbye? Was he worried about Ben and taking his emotions out on me? I hadn’t encountered this side of him before. And I wasn’t sure that I liked it.
The drive to Quarter Square seemed to drag on forever. After our little spat, neither of us spoke a word for at least twenty minutes. Xander kept his eyes on the road, deep in thought. I watched him, recalling the bits and pieces of my dreams. Those had to be dreams. He’d spoken to me with such compassion, such gentleness. I wasn’t sure the guy sitting beside me was capable of such emotions. Part of me regretted ever getting in the car with him in the first place. But I knew that I had to see Ben. I owed him that. And seeing that I was on an apology tour today, I owed him one, too.
“Why are you staring at me like that?” Xander quipped.
“I’m not staring,” I insisted.
“Oh, you’re definitely staring.” He glanced over and me and batted his eyelashes in a playfully obnoxious manner.