He stops talking for a second and I take that as a sign that I’m allowed to speak. I momentarily wonder why he hasn’t mentioned the baby. “Nate, I believe that you are sorry. But I’ve thought a lot about it over the past five weeks and I don’t think it will work with us. I understand why, and I don’t fault you for the women that have caused you to have trust issues, but I don’t think I can live life with a man who is always wondering if and when I will cheat on him.”
“No.” He leaves his chair and gets on his knees next to my chair and touches my leg gently, sending familiar sparks up to my tight chest. “No, Brooklyn, I need you to understand that I’ve addressed my trust issues. I’ve been seeing my therapist and he has given me coping mechanisms. I know you aren’t sleeping with Ryan. I knew even back then that you weren’t. It wasn’t you I didn’t trust, it was him.”
“Still, how do I know you won’t have these same issues with him again, or with any other man in my life, for that matter?” I ask him.
“That’s what I’m trying to tell you, Brooklyn.” He looks up at me from his place on the floor. He takes my hand in his. “Dr. Bloom, my therapist, he told me that one of the things I can do to help with my trust issues is to make friends with all of the men in your life. And not just meet them either, really get to know them on a deeper level,” he says, squeezing my hand, “and, it works. It’s working.”
“What do you mean it’s working?”
“Well, weeks ago, only days after you left, after my first session with Dr. Bloom, I contacted Ryan and—”
“What?” I interrupt him. “He didn’t say anything.” I look at him and search his eyes for answers.
“I asked him not to. I wanted everything in place before I came down here to try to win you back. You see these sketches? This is what Ryan and I have been working on. You are looking at the newest location of Brooklyn’s Bakery. Up in Raleigh. You will own a chain.” His eyes light up.
My eyes widen with alarm.
He shakes his head. “Not a franchise, Brooklyn, a second location. One that you will have complete control over.” He retrieves some papers from the file folder. “See, this is a new contract allowing you to buy out Ryan over the next few years.”
“Buy him out? But that’s not—”
“His idea, not mine,” he assures me.
I am stunned silent. I try to process this information. New bakery . . . he and Ryan are friends . . . he wants me back.
He interrupts my thoughts when he says, “There is one more sketch I want you to see.” Then he slowly lifts the sleeve of his left arm up to his shoulder, revealing a new tattoo. I can’t quite believe what I’m seeing and I’m not sure if I’m going to laugh or cry. Right there on the outside of his arm, for the entire world to see is my name, ‘Brooklyn’ emblazoned over the outline of a cupcake that is identical to the one on my marquee. Underneath the picture are two small italicized words that read ‘My Reason’.
I trace the tattoo with my finger and notice goose bumps traveling down his arm. “When did you do this?” I ask him.
“About three weeks ago. It’s fully healed, see?” He pokes his finger on it.
Three weeks ago? But I just found out about the baby three days ago. “Nate, I have to tell you something.” I brace myself for his reaction.
“No, Brooklyn. You don’t. I already know everything, he told me. Anyway, it doesn’t matter what happened while we were apart. We are together now and I’m better and I will spend the rest of my life making it up to you if that is what it takes for you to forgive me.”
He knows everything? Then why doesn’t he talk about the baby? He has been here ten whole minutes and hasn’t brought up the fact that we are going to be parents. Is he scared? Maybe he doesn’t really want it. Plus he said ‘he told me everything’. Who told him? Graham? I asked Emma not to tell anyone. I’m so confused.
I look down at the sketches again. “So, I guess you expect me to just forgive you and move up to Raleigh to run the new shop?”
He angles his head to study my reaction. “No, not at all,” he says, “but I certainly won’t object to you spending lots of time up there. You do what you want. It is your choice.”
He stands up and holds his hand out to me. “Will you come with me?” he asks, begging me with his eyes. “Please? Will you go on a drive with me?”
I want to say no. I should say no.
“Okay,” I whisper.
He runs out to the kitchen and has a quick conversation with . . . Ryan? I didn’t even know he was back. Then it dawns on me. New business venture . . . he was up in Raleigh with Nate and he probably came back down here with him.
He leads me out to his car and we ride in silence. As soon as he makes the turn, I know where he is taking me. As we pull up to The Bend, memories shuffle through my head. The first time we came here, he took my virginity. The second time we came here he stole my heart forever. I fear this third time will erase those memories if we end up fighting over where I’m going to live or who will raise the baby. “Nate, do we have to—”
“Yes, Brooklyn. We have to be here. This is the one place we absolutely have to be right now. There is no other place I could imagine being with you on this day.”
He parks the car and runs around to open the door for me. He walks me over to a clearing that is already set up with a blanket and a cooler. He drops my hand then heads back to the car to retrieve something from the glove box.
He walks back slowly towards me, hand running through his hair. I see beads of sweat dot his forehead even though it is a mild day. He steps onto the blanket, taking me with him but we don’t sit down. He takes a deep breath and blows it out slowly as he gathers my hands in his.
“Brooklyn, I love you so much. More than I ever thought possible. You are my reason.” He gestures with his eyes towards his new tattoo. “You are the reason I changed, you are the reason I’m still changing because I want to become a better person for you.” He gestures to his old tattoo and says, “You are my reason to live and I know for damn sure I would die for you.”
He reaches into his pants pocket and pulls out a small velvet box while tears roll down my face. He starts to lower himself onto a knee.
Oh, God. He is going to propose. This is all happening too fast. I can’t let him do this. Not for all the wrong reasons. I know that I will love this man until the day I die but I can’t let him be forced into marrying me. He will end up resenting me and I love him too much for that.
I shake my head at him. “Nate, no. You can’t do this just because of the baby.”
His face pales and he takes a step back. “What did you say?”
“I know that Graham told you, you said back at the shop that he did,” I say.
“Graham?” He looks confused. “What Graham told me?” He shakes his head. “Graham didn’t tell me anything. Ryan told me that you made a pass at him. He told me that you were trying to get over me and that you kissed him. I told you back at the shop that it didn’t matter, that none of that matters anymore.”
Oh, God. He doesn’t know. The new bakery, the tattoo, the flowers, the proposal . . . it was all to get me back. Not because he was forced into anything.
He stands before me, hands trembling, and blood draining from his face. “Brooklyn, what did you say about a baby?”
“I—I’m two months pregnant. I just found out a few days ago.” My voice hitches as I try to get the words out. “I was going to tell you soon but I didn’t know how. I didn’t know if you would be mad or what. It was the antibiotics I took. I didn’t do it on purpose, if that’s what you’re thinking.”
As I keep talking, trying to explain how this happened, he falls to his knees, wraps his arms around me and puts his lips to my stomach. He holds me so tight that I fear he may squish little peanut right out of my belly.
He hears me grunt and loosens his grip. “Sorry.” He looks up at me. “My God, Brooklyn. I’m going to be a dad?”
“Yes, Nate, you’re going to
be a daddy.”
His eyes are brimming with tears and he blinks letting them roll down off his face and onto my shirt. “I didn’t know until this very second,” he says into my belly. “I didn’t know that hearing those words would make me the happiest man alive.”
He wipes his face off and looks around on the ground for the box that he dropped. He opens it up, still down on his knees, and looks up at me and says, “Brooklyn Anne Vaughn, just when I thought loving you more was impossible, you go and prove me wrong. My heart is yours. It will always belong to you, that is, if you’ll have it . . . both of you.” He rubs my tummy. Then he takes the ring from the box and holds it out to me. “Everything about you makes me a better man,” he quotes a verse from our song, taking yet another piece of my heart and meshing it with his. “Will you please make all my dreams come true by becoming my wife?”
I look down at my not-so-broken man and think of what he has done for me. Not just today, but every day. I reflect back on all of the times he has shared his most private thoughts and fears about his mom, his ex-wife and baseball. I think about how he is always watching out for me and protecting me and I know he will extend that to our child and make a wonderful father.
Memories of dancing in the rain, bracelet inscriptions and his intricate sketches of me flood my thoughts. Of course I’m going to say yes. Any other answer was never an option.
“Yes,” I squeak out through my joyful sobs. “Of course, yes!” I cry out as he slips the most beautiful diamond I’ve ever seen onto my finger.
Chapter Thirty-two
Nate pulls me down to the blanket and kisses me with the intensity of the thousands of kisses that we have missed over the past five weeks. He worships my lips with his lips and my body with his hands. He whispers in my ear that he is going to touch every inch of my body first with his hands, then with his tongue.
Moisture spreads between my thighs as I anticipate what he promises to do. My desire builds quicker than I thought possible, simply by the friction of his body rubbing on mine. Before I realize it, I’m being pulled under, my body a boneless fit of quivering mass as he is pinching and tugging my nipples through my shirt.
“Wow,” I say to him, surprised as he is at what just happened.
“Damn.” He looks at me with desire streaming from his eyes. “We should have ten kids if this is what pregnancy does to you.”
I giggle at him but quickly find it is no longer funny, but so incredibly sexy, when he gets up and removes all of his clothing. I lie here and admire every curve and ridge of his gorgeous body that I have missed more than I can say. I practically drool when his erection springs free from his boxer briefs and stands at full attention before me.
He can see I’m already building up again so he wastes no time removing my clothing as well, only stopping when he unbuttons my jeans to place a gentle kiss onto my belly. When he has me stripped completely naked, he starts down at my feet and delivers on the promise he made to me moments ago. He touches, kisses and licks up each leg and each arm before he again claims my mouth.
“Nate, please,” I beg. “It’s been so long.”
“I know, baby, and that is why I need to savor every beautiful part of your incredible body.” He continues licking and sucking his way up to my ear and around my neck before he descends upon my breasts.
He takes them into his hands and moans in pleasure, “God, Brooklyn, your boobs got bigger. I mean they were perfect before, but the surprises keep coming.” He smiles appreciatively and takes each of my nipples, in turn, into his mouth. He sucks and pulls and puts just enough pressure to make me writhe and moan beneath him. “I’ve missed that sound.” He looks up at me. “I’ve missed everything about you so goddamn much.”
A happy tear slips from my eye. “Me, too, Nate. I’ve missed you more than words can say.”
He trails kisses along each of my ribs down to my belly, where he spends some extra time. He mumbles something about baby and I can’t tell if he is speaking to me or the peanut. And at this moment, I don’t care. He has me wound up so tight that I’m going to come crashing down around him as soon as he touches me down there.
He tickles his fingers around my thighs, kissing and sucking everywhere but the spot that he knows will detonate me. Finally, after what seems like hours of tortuous pleasure, he slips a finger into my slick opening. He lets out a groan. “Oh, you are so wet for me.” Then he leans down again and slowly, sensuously runs his tongue along my cleft sending waves of hot-white heat through my body. He assaults my clit with flicks and laves of his tongue while two fingers work their way in and out of me.
He reaches up to pinch my nipple and that’s all it takes to push me over the edge and send me spiraling into pleasurable explosions of need and desire. I grip his hair as my thighs clench his head, holding him captive while I ride out the flood of sensation that overwhelms me.
As I come down from the phenomenal orgasm he has just given me, he crawls up my body and says, “Jesus, Brooklyn, that was the hottest thing I’ve ever seen.” He positions himself over me. “I can’t wait another second to be inside of you.”
“Then don’t,” I beg, as I lift my hips up to him while he slides his hard length inside me. I close my eyes and try to feel every bit of him as he slowly makes my every nerve ripple with pleasure as he works himself in and out of me. “That feels incredible. I love you so much. I promise I’ll be yours forever.”
He stiffens and grips my flesh, panting whispers of love in my ear as he finds his release, shooting his hot stream deep inside me. His rough, sexy whispers bring me to my own third glorious climax.
I don’t think I can move and I belatedly hope that nobody will pull up and see us in our full naked glory here in the bright mid-day sun. However, I’m not sure I would even care.
Nate reaches over to the cooler and pulls out a bottle of champagne and two glasses. He shrugs and says, “Sorry.” He nods to my stomach. “I didn’t know or I would have brought sparkling water.”
“A sip won’t hurt the peanut,” I tell him. “We have to celebrate.”
“The peanut?” He raises his eyebrows at me and I nod.
Thirty minutes later we are packing up to head back. Nate types out a text on his phone. “Work stuff,” he tells me when I look at him sideways.
We hold hands and talk about the peanut the entire way back home and I feel like this is the most natural thing in the world. By the time we pull up behind the bakery, my face hurts from the grin I’ve had plastered on it for the last twenty minutes.
We enter through the bakery door and I turn to go upstairs when Nate says, “Come with me, I want to show you something.” He has a huge smile on his face like a kid on Christmas morning.
I follow him to the front of the shop. When he pulls me through the swinging door, we hear, “Congratulations!” collectively from what looks to be everyone who matters to me in the whole world.
I look at the happy faces of my parents, my best friend, her husband, Ryan and the rest of my staff. Nate’s dad and sister are here. Even Michael’s sister, Janie, is here. She has tears rolling down her smiling face as she nods her head at me like she finally understands what happened at Michael’s grave. Every single person that I could dream about sharing this moment with is right in this room.
I turn to Nate. “The text?”
He nods at me. “God, Brooklyn, I was so scared you would say no. I’ve been planning this for weeks. With lots of help, of course.” He gestures to Ryan and Emma.
Ryan walks up and to my surprise, Nate shakes his hand and gives him one of those man hugs. “Thanks for all your help, buddy,” Nate says to him.
I give Ryan a hug. “You don’t have to do this,” I say, referring to the new contract. “I won’t sign it, you know.”
“You will sign it, Lyn.” He smiles. “I have a strict policy never to be in business with family.”
We greet everyone in turn. I learn that Nate asked my dad for my hand in marriage. He also has Emma d
oing the interior design for the new bakery. The shop staff put this party together all without my knowledge.
Emma walks over and hugs me, tears streaming down both our faces. “You said yes! I’m so happy for you.”
“Well, how could I say no to the guy who tattooed a cupcake on his body for me?” I say, earning laughs from everyone around me.
“Speaking of cupcakes, what’s with only having red velvet?” Emma points over to a display table adorned with a beautiful setting of dozens of red velvet cupcakes.
Nate walks us over to the table and picks one up. “For luck,” he says. “I have one before every game.” I think back to that night in high school when he told me about his pre-game routine with the red velvet cupcakes. He holds me tight and kisses my cheek. “And this will be, by far, the biggest game of my life.”
Nate takes me to the side, pulling me down onto his lap at a table in the corner. “You know, the game has changed now.” He rubs a thumb over my belly. “I don’t think I can live one day without you . . . without peanut.” He takes a breath and runs his hand through his hair. “What do you say, Brooklyn. Will you two move to Raleigh with me?”
He bites his lip and entwines our fingers as he awaits my response.
I look at my larger-than-life man. He is not perfect. He may always have issues with trust. He may always have issues with his mother. But I can’t imagine not having him in my life. I look around at the party and see how much everyone loves him. How they’ve all gone out of their way to help him win me back. They know we belong together. I know we belong together. The road may not always be easy. But then again, it’s the bumps in the road that make us stronger. I rub a finger over my bracelet and remember another man I was engaged to. Then I look down at the ring that sits on my left ring finger.
I look into the alluring blue eyes of my new fiancé and realize that he is my home. I can’t live without him, I can’t breathe without him. Of course I’m going to say yes. Any other answer was never an option.
Be My Reason Page 26