Mom turned back to him, eyes shiny with tears, and the crack inside him widened to a gaping hole. “I want you to be happy.”
“I am happy.”
She clicked her tongue. “You are not. I’ve heard it in your voice for months, then I see you, and you’ve got too much stress in your life. You need a break.”
“That’s why I’m here.” Honestly, he couldn’t remember the last time he’d been truly happy—probably when he sold his script. Even the movie premiere was tainted with bad memories, thanks to his ex. This past week when he was working on the lake house was actually the best he’d felt in a long time. And there for a few minutes today with Brynn, but he was trying not to think about that. “Maybe once I make a name for myself I can visit more. Or maybe you could move to California, too. It’d be sunny and—”
“I’d never leave North Carolina. This is where I belong.” This is where all my memories are, she didn’t say, but she wrapped her hand around the locket on her neck. Dad had given her the necklace for their first wedding anniversary, and Sawyer knew it now held a picture of her two boys—him and Dad.
When Dad passed away after several months of barely living, Sawyer had wondered if Mom would be relieved she didn’t have to pour every ounce of energy into taking care of his needs anymore. He hated himself for even thinking it now, especially after seeing how destroyed she’d been. He knew she would’ve taken care of him forever if it meant not losing him.
Mom dropped her hand and opened the oven door.
The scent of roasted bass filled the air. He hadn’t thought he was that hungry, but he’d suffer through anything—even an awkward blind date with his mom watching—if it meant eating her specialty dish.
Mom walked to the doorway of the kitchen. “Kayla sweetie, we’re just grabbing the food. Go ahead and have a seat at the table and we’ll be right there.” She glanced over her shoulder at Sawyer. “Can you grab the plates?” Sawyer stacked three plates and placed the silverware on top of them.
As they were about to step into the dining room, Mom leaned in close and whispered, “And just give Kayla a chance. Please? For me? I really think you’ll like her.”
So much for thinking he’d gotten through to her. Unfortunately for his dating life, he was a sucker when it came to his mom.
Chapter Four
Brynn pushed into the Tavern. She’d killed a few hours in a restaurant, studying lines and marking up her playbook in the places she needed to work on. What kept coming into her head, though, was Sawyer’s hands on her waist. That moment when everything had changed and it felt like something magical was hanging in the air between them. But he’d only been getting paint out of her hair.
She told herself to focus on the fact that he’d called her a dork, even if he didn’t realize he had. Tomorrow she’d be sure to make a comment about how jocks were dumb. That’d show him. To err was human. To forgive a guy like Sawyer Raines, not worth her time.
Brynn sat across from Paul, who was scrubbing a hand over his face, his eyes redder than usual. “How’d the numbers look today?”
He let out a long exhale. “We’re hanging in there. Still down a bit from last year, but it’ll pick up. July and August are always big months for us.”
Bigfish Bait and Tackle had been in their family for three generations. When Mom and Dad retired last year, Paul had taken over and asked if she wanted to help him run it. She’d just gotten out of college and needed a job. Not to mention she’d grown up in that shop, running through the aisles and making necklaces and bracelets out of fishing lures—Dad used to tell her he’d sell them and she’d make them all rich. Paul had played in the aisles and helped out, too, and they both felt the pressure not to screw up their family’s legacy.
“Maybe we should run coupons in the paper,” Brynn said. “A buy-one-get-one-half-off special. See if it’ll bring in more people.”
Paul set his beer down and nodded. “We can try it out, see if it’s profitable. You’ll take care of getting it in the paper, right?”
“I’ll talk to my contact there.” Really, Mr. Daniels was everyone’s contact for the paper, but it sounded fancier when she referred to him as hers. She had to find a way to make it more dramatic, right? Once in a while having a literature degree with a minor in theater seemed like a waste—she should’ve taken more business classes—but she’d enjoyed those years. And while she didn’t have grand visions of becoming a Broadway or Hollywood actress the way she had back in high school, she certainly hadn’t pictured herself helping run the Bait and Tackle forever.
“Sometimes I feel like we’ve turned into Mom and Dad. You’re always going on and on about numbers, while I’m bent over the register, complaining about how we have to watch the same damn fishing show over and over.”
Paul laughed, then frowned. “That’s a bit depressing, come to think of it. Hopefully soon we’ll both find significant others and have kids of our own running around and wreaking havoc on the merchandise like we did. And the World Fishing Network is always adding new shows to the mix.”
“It doesn’t much matter; they’re all the same. Watching another person fish is about as entertaining as watching grass grow. And as for marriage and kids, well, in case you haven’t noticed, neither one of us is very close to that possibility.” As soon as she said it, she wanted to take it back. Paul had thought he’d found the one about six months ago, and had even bought a ring, but then he discovered she was cheating on him. It still made Brynn’s blood boil when she thought about it.
Paul leaned forward, propping his elbows on the table. She thought he was going to say something about his ex, but then he smiled and said, “Speak for yourself. I’m out every night working on making babies. The ladies love me, in case you haven’t noticed.”
“Ew.” Brynn picked up the cardboard coaster and threw it at his head, but she couldn’t help but laugh. If he really was that guy, she’d launch into a lecture about treating women with respect, but she knew deep down he wanted to find a nice girl and settle down.
Paul lifted his hand in a wave, and Brynn glanced back. Dani and Wes were heading their way. Brynn stood to greet them—she’d always been a hugger. It had taken a while for Dani to get used to it—she used to stiffen up—but now she actually leaned in for it as they exchanged greetings.
Instead of taking the two chairs, Wes pulled Dani onto his lap and wrapped his arms around her. They were in that kiss-every-five-seconds, newly engaged stage of love. Maybe it made her weird, but Brynn always got a bit of a love-high off people like that. Of course it triggered the longing to have someone special in her life, but it also meant that love like that still happened. So she could be patient. If a great guy could come along any day now, though, she definitely wouldn’t complain.
“So,” Wes said. “What’s going on?”
“A whole lot of nothing,” Paul said, then everyone turned to her.
“Just work and then rehearsing the play,” Brynn said. “I kind of want to strangle the new director, so there’s that.”
Dani nudged Brynn with her elbow, something Brynn was starting to get used to. “I thought you were Team Sunshine and Rainbows.” When Dani had been talking favorite basketball teams with the guys last weekend, Brynn had said she was Team Sunshine and Rainbows. Seemed like a good team to root for.
“I’m still for all that. It’s just this guy…” What to say about Sawyer? He was hot and frustrating, nice and insulting—all at the same time. Suddenly she was picturing him back in high school, when he was all those things as well, except for nice. “He’s one of those guys who oozes cockiness.”
“Ugh, I hate that type of guy.” Dani grinned at Wes. “Not sure how I ended up engaged to one.”
“You got lucky, that’s how,” Wes said, and then he and Dani started kissing. Paul rolled his eyes and Brynn shrugged and sat back in her chair, knowing it could be a while before the couple came up for air.
“There’s Rob,” Paul said, tapping the table in front of
Wes and Dani. “We better go get set up.”
He and Wes pushed away from the table. Dani stood, too. She glanced at Brynn and then turned to Wes and put her hand on his arm. “I think Brynn and I will just hang out here. We’ll come up front when you start your set.”
“Good luck getting past all the groupies,” Wes joked. “Actually, your groupies will probably be here tonight. Five bucks they demand the sexy singer come onstage again.”
“No telling them to ask me, or the bet’s off.”
They exchanged another quick kiss, and then Wes, Paul, and Rob headed toward the tiny room in the back so they could set up. Dani flagged down a waitress, asked for a beer, and turned to Brynn. “Whatcha want?”
“I’ll just have a Coke.” What she really wanted was one of those fruity lemonades, but the only time she’d tried to order it here, the waitress looked at her like she was asking for a kidney.
Once they were alone again, Dani propped her elbow on the table. “Sorry, you were saying something about the director of your play driving you crazy?”
“I knew him in high school,” Brynn said, the admission taking some of the pressure off her chest but knotting her stomach at the same time. “His name’s Sawyer Raines, and he was one of the popular guys. And I was at the opposite end of the cool crowd. High school was a super awkward time for me.”
To Dani’s credit, she didn’t act like that was a given or even try to mock surprise. Brynn powered on. “I mean, I’m still not like most girls, I know that. I work in a fishing shop, yet I like theater and show tunes—if my life were one big Broadway musical, I’d be psyched. I ramble too much and I’m not what anyone would call smooth. And I’ve come to peace with all that. Or at least I thought I did. But seeing him, it brought back those bad memories, and I keep telling myself not to let him get to me, but he makes me feel so self-conscious. And then suddenly I’m tripping and dropping paint on my clothes and…” Thinking about what it would be like to kiss him, the same way I used to back in high school. “I hate feeling like this again.”
“I think we all have those people who bring out our insecurities,” Dani said. “But just so you know, I like who you are.”
“Maybe now. You thought I was weird at first—admit it.”
Dani laughed. “I did not think you were weird. I’ve just never met someone quite so bubbly and excited about hugs, and I wasn’t sure how to take it. I’m used to hanging out with guys. But I’m glad we met, and I’m totally down with the hugging thing now. From you, anyway. Don’t go spreading that around.”
Brynn smiled, warmth filling her chest. “Thanks. I’m glad I met you, too.” That was the truth. All of her close girlfriends had moved away, and she was happy to have someone to talk to. Their drinks showed up and for a moment they sat and sipped them, the garbled seventies hits from the jukebox floating through the air.
Brynn tipped back the last of the Coke, again wishing it were strawberry or raspberry lemonade. “I think I need to start actively looking for a guy, because Prince Charming sure ain’t knocking at my door. Guess you don’t know any cute single guys.”
Dani twisted her cup, leaving circles on the wooden tabletop. “Sorry. The only single guys I know are Paul and the other pilot who works with Wes. He happens to also be in his fifties and bald.”
“Hot,” Brynn deadpanned. “Add an unhealthy love for fishing, and I’m sold.”
Dani laughed. “Between working with Wes on marketing for his new helicopter tours and planning this wedding with his mom’s help, I haven’t met many other people. I did, however, land a part-time job at a basketball camp that runs over the summer. Maybe there will be a cute coach there. I’ll keep a lookout.”
“No jocks. They’re cute, but I don’t mesh with that type.” Once more, Sawyer’s face flashed through her mind. The current version. Ugh, she needed to get him out of her head and focus on finding a guy she actually had a shot with. Part of her problem was she always expected her dates to be these life-changing moments filled with air-crackling chemistry. She’d only had two steady boyfriends since high school, and neither one had given her that magical I-want-to-be-around-you-every-second sensation. Maybe it was her. Maybe she’d OD’d on fictional love stories and real guys couldn’t compare—Paul constantly told her that she had unrealistic expectations. She supposed she could lower them a little bit.
Guess I just need to settle for a guy who doesn’t make me want to vomit.
It was a low bar. Surely someone could reach it.
Over the course of the night, Brynn met a couple guys who fit her new standard. She managed to scare the first prospect away when she responded to him using a Shakespeare quote. In her defense, he was the one who commented that he was ready to stop watching the news because it was so depressing lately. All she’d said was, “Life’s but a walking shadow, a poor player that struts and frets his hour upon the stage, and then is heard no more.” Macbeth. What a buzz kill—she should’ve known better.
The other guy showed a lot of interest, which was flattering, but he kept massaging her back and the contact made her skin crawl. Bar lowered or not, that wasn’t the way it was supposed to be. And hello, she’d just met him. What was wrong with holding hands? Or at least asking a couple get-to-know-you questions first?
So she ditched the guy as nicely as possible, made her way to the stage area, and pushed into the back room.
Dani glanced at her as she entered. “How’d it go?”
Brynn shook her head. “It didn’t.”
“You’ll have better luck next time. Bars aren’t really a good place to meet guys anyway.”
“So where do I go, then? How do people even meet anymore?”
“Honestly, I have no idea. I tried Internet dating for a little while, and I met one decent guy, but I was already in love with Wes, so it didn’t really take.” Dani leaned against the wall and watched Wes as he put away his guitar.
“Well, I don’t have a best friend who’s a guy, so…”
Dani twisted to face her. “It wasn’t just that we were friends, though. I mean, that was awesome, because we already knew each other so well, but I felt this shift. Every look, every touch—it was like…like my heart was trying to clue me in before my head got it.” She swiped her bangs behind her ear and they immediately fell forward. “I guess I’m saying you’ll know it when the time’s right. It sort of hits you and makes you feel like you’ve been mowed down by a linebacker. But in a good way.” Dani winced, ran her fingers over her forehead, then raised her voice. “You’re turning me into a sappy girl, Wes Turner. I hope you’re happy.”
He shot her a grin over his shoulder. “Couldn’t be happier.”
If comparing love to being hit by a football player is sappy, I don’t even want to know what Dani would think of my lines of poetry. Or the quotes I love from plays and books. What’s beyond sappy?
Still, she wanted the sappy.
“I think I’m going to take off,” Brynn said.
Dani actually initiated the hug this time. “Call me if you want to chat or go out or whatever. I’ll even attempt to be a good wingman if you want to hit up a club or whatever.”
“Thanks.” Brynn told the guys good-bye and headed to her car. As she made the twenty-minute drive home, she mentally scolded herself for comparing every guy to Sawyer tonight, the same pathetic way she’d done in high school. But when he’d been the one mere inches from her, shrinking away hadn’t been her first instinct. Ugh, maybe this was all karma. She’d turned down perfectly nice guys back then because they weren’t the dream scenario she’d played out in her mind, the one where Sawyer realized she was the girl for him and dumped his cliché cheerleader girlfriend for her.
Billy Miller liked me. We were both in drama club, and I brushed him off. The guy used to be tall and scrawny, as awkward as she was if not more. But he’d filled out, bulked up, and now he constantly had a pretty girl on his arm. Brynn gripped her steering wheel tighter. It just proved that even nerds who turned
hot let their looks go to their heads. Hotness equaled jerkiness.
When she pulled up to her house a few minutes later, she noticed the lights next door were on. The lawn still needed mowing and weeds were climbing up the porch railing and sides of the house—so far, she didn’t see much of a change.
Brynn got out of her car and noticed a dark figure on the porch.
He walked closer, his footsteps heavy on the wooden planks. She knew it would be Sawyer, but when he stepped into the glow of the porch light, her breath still caught. It wasn’t fair that the sight of him sent her pulse racing. For a moment, they simply regarded each other. She had no idea what to say after the way things had ended this afternoon.
Does he even know I was mad? Simply looking at him, she got angry all over again. She’d been considering letting go of the past—she wanted to. But then he’d gone and made her feel like the awkward girl she used to be.
Hotness equals jerkiness, hotness equals jerkiness—she planned on repeating it until she got it through her head.
“I’m just measuring out a few things,” Sawyer said, breaking the silence. “Don’t worry, I finished with the noisy stuff already.”
She lifted her chin. “Good.” Another beat of staring, then she started up the steps of her own porch.
“Brynn.” There was something about the way he said her name that made the anger she was desperately trying to hold on to slip from her body. “You wanna run lines? We’ve got this Romeo and Juliet matchup going on, facing balconies—or porches or whatever.”
Damn, how could she resist a Romeo and Juliet reference? Although, technically, Juliet was the only one on a balcony.
Act Like You Love Me (An Accidentally in Love Novel) (Entangled: Bliss) Page 4