by Connie Mason
“I don’t understand.”
“I don’t suppose you do. Sunset Hill presented a challenge, one that I embraced wholeheartedly. I love the sea, but I looked forward to making Sunset Hill profitable. It was a new adventure, and I always did relish venturing into unknown territory. It takes my mind off . . .” He fell silent.
Sophia knew exactly what Chris had been running from these past seven years. His guilt.
“Your wealth or lack of it makes no difference to me, Chris. I’m not leaving Jamaica.”
“You will leave, even if I have to carry you aboard the Mary Deare. And I’m sending Casper with you.”
“Why do you care whether or not I remain? It’s my choice.”
“It’s my choice. You’re my wife, and I intend to keep you safe. Don’t argue, for you won’t win. You’re going and that’s final. I’ll send Kateena to help you pack. We’ll leave for Kingston first thing in the morning. You can wait with the others at the King’s Arms for the ship to arrive.”
Sophia’s mouth flattened. “If you make me leave, things will never be the same between us. I will never be a wife to you again.” She turned away.
He swung her around to face him. “Don’t make threats you’ll regret, Sophia. You are leaving and that’s final. My brother will take care of you until I send for you.”
“The danger is as great for you as it is for me,” Sophia charged. “If you don’t need the plantation, come with me. We can live anywhere. I know you never wanted this marriage, but please don’t send me away.”
Chris stiffened. “Is that why you think I want you to leave? You’re wrong, dead wrong. I married you to keep you safe, and you won’t be safe here.”
She backed away from him, his determination to send her away leaving an ache that would never heal. “Deny it all you want, but Desmond’s death is still a raw wound inside you. Until it heals, we can’t be together. I shall leave, but don’t expect me to return. I knew our marriage was a mistake.”
“Sophia, listen to reason. No matter what, we’re still married. Nothing will change that. When I send for you, you’d damn well better return.”
“Go to hell, Chris! When I leave Jamaica, I will live my life as I see fit. If you cared for me, you wouldn’t send me away.”
“You little fool! I’m sending you away to protect you.”
“Protecting me—that’s all it’s ever been about. I want more than that. If I can’t have what I want, what I need, I may as well leave and be done with this marriage and you. Excuse me—I’ve packing to do.”
“I’ll have the letters ready before we leave for Kingston tomorrow.” He nodded curtly and stormed off.
Sophia opened her mouth to tell him she wanted neither his brother’s protection nor his money, but she promptly closed it. She’d need money for lodging and expenses. She wasn’t sure whether she wanted to buy a cottage in the country or rent a modest town house in a respectable neighborhood in London. She was through with living like a pauper, depending on Rayford for her sustenance. If Chris couldn’t love her, he could at least support her.
Casper and Chris entered the dining room together that night. Sophia could tell by the look on Casper’s face that he wasn’t happy. In fact, he looked downright defiant.
“Is something wrong, Casper?”
Casper sent Chris a sullen look. “The captain said I have to go to London with you. He said you need my protection.”
Sophia shot Chris a quizzical glance. Chris returned it with a warning look.
“I don’t want to leave the captain, Sophia. He needs me. After you leave, he’ll have no one.”
“That’s his choice, Casper, not mine. It won’t be so bad. We can explore London together. Or maybe we’ll live in the country. We can do anything we like.”
“It won’t be for long,” Chris promised. “I’ll send for you and Sophia as soon as the current situation is resolved. I may even come for you myself. I promised Justin I’d return to England for the christening of his heir.”
“Truly?” Casper asked.
“You have my word. But you must promise to behave and give Sophia no trouble.”
“I promise,” Casper said, albeit reluctantly.
After the somber meal, Casper left to pack his belongings. Sophia excused herself immediately afterward. Chris rose and followed her up the stairs. Sophia entered their bedroom and turned on him.
“What do you want?”
He reached for her. She skittered away. “This is our last night before we part. It may be months before we’re together again.”
“More like never,” Sophia retorted. “You can always ease your loneliness with Lady Amanda.”
“She’s leaving with Lady Chester. Besides, you don’t mean that.”
She searched his face. “Chris, do you love me?”
He hesitated. “Define love.”
“If you felt it, I wouldn’t have to describe it.”
“I feel desire for you—that’s always been an integral part of our relationship.”
“Admit it, lust is the only emotion you’re capable of where I’m concerned.”
“I want to make love to you, Sophia. I can’t let you go without a proper good-bye.”
“Then don’t let me go.”
“That’s not an option and you know it. Will you let me love you, Sophia?”
She shook herself free from the burning desire in his eyes. “Letting you bed me was never a problem; making you love me was.”
With a groan, Chris reached for her and bore her to the bed. He was so eager for her he didn’t bother undressing her. Instead, he shoved her skirts to her waist and knelt between her thighs. He unbuttoned his fly; his cock sprang free.
But instead of impaling her immediately, he bent his head and placed his mouth on her, feeding on her pink, succulent flesh. But he was too needy to linger on preliminaries. Sophia was leaving, and he wouldn’t see her again for a very long time. This was their last night together. When she began to moan and raise her hips to meet his questing tongue, he rose up, balanced himself on his muscular arms and thrust inside her.
He captured her lips, his mouth devouring hers, his hands kneading her breasts. Needing to touch bare skin, he found the edges of her bodice and tore it open. Then he closed his mouth over her nipple and suckled. He felt her body convulse, heard the keening wail building in her throat. His mouth left her breast and returned to her lips, swallowing her cry as she shattered in his arms. He shouted his climax into her mouth and exploded.
“Was that good-bye, Chris?” Sophia asked when her breathing returned to normal.
“For now, Sophia, but not forever.”
Sophia doubted that very much. Nevertheless, she didn’t object when he undressed her and then himself and began to make love to her again. This time, his initial urgency appeased, he slowly built her passion and his until a firestorm of need roared through them, culminating in sweet surrender.
Chapter Sixteen
Sophia and Chris spent two nights at the King’s Arms before the Mary Deare arrived. They had made love both nights; Sophia couldn’t refuse him despite her anger, for it might be the last time she and Chris were together as husband and wife.
Sophia stood at the rail now, watching Chris grow smaller as the ship slipped her moorings and rode the wind across the bay. Their good-bye at the dock had been coolly polite in spite of their heated lovemaking the previous three nights. Her passionate response had done nothing to change his mind about sending her away.
Because of the limited quarters, Sophia was forced to share a cabin with Amanda while Agatha and her children occupied another. Rayford was given the first mate’s cabin, which he shared with Casper, while the first mate bunked with the second mate.
During the long voyage, Sophia helped Agatha with the children and tutored Casper in geography and English. She kept as far away from Ray as possible; she spoke to him only at the evening meal, when all the passengers came together. To Sophia’s dismay, Ray and Ama
nda had formed a close friendship. They were often together on the deck, their heads together, engaged in intimate conversation.
Sophia tried to fill the long days at sea with activity, but the endless nights were difficult. She missed Chris. Even though she had accepted that he could never love her, just being with him, making love with him, had made life bearable. Now she had nothing. Chris had sent her away, and what was left of her shattered pride would prevent her from returning when he sent for her—if he sent for her.
Chris hadn’t wanted a wife. He especially hadn’t wanted Sophia. Being with her kept his guilt over Desmond’s death alive. He had used the potential slave rebellion as an excuse to send her away.
Sharing a cabin with Amanda was as bad as Sophia had suspected it would be, and she was grateful to Ray for keeping Amanda occupied much of the day. But at night she had to suffer Amanda’s complaints of boredom, bad food and the damage the salt air was doing to her flawless complexion. Amanda bemoaned the lack of fresh water for bathing and needled Sophia about her sickly appearance.
“I intend to return to Jamaica when all this is over. Chris and I had scarcely time to renew our acquaintance,” Amanda told Sophia one day as Sophia prepared to leave the cabin.
“Good luck,” Sophia replied, walking away from Chris’s ex-lover. She was heartily sick of listening to Amanda’s bragging about her relationship with Chris.
Once the ship left the warm southern waters and entered colder climes, Sophia and the others spent less time on deck. Late-fall weather in England was usually rainy and cold, and no one had clothing warm enough to protect them against the cutting north wind. Sophia spent long hours by herself, pondering the past few months she’d spent as Chris’s wife and wondering what the future held for her.
Fortunately, no storms appeared on the horizon to delay the Mary Deare and she arrived in London on schedule. As the ship slid into her berth in London Pool, Rayford cornered Sophia on the windswept deck.
“What are your plans now, Sophia?” he asked. “Will you return to the family home in Essex?”
“No, I have no fond memories of the family estate. I haven’t decided where Casper and I will settle. Chris wants us to stay with his brother, and perhaps we will until other arrangements can be made.”
“How will you manage on your own without the earl’s support?”
“I have access to Chris’s bank account.”
An avaricious gleam appeared in Rayford’s eyes. “Perhaps you can find it in your heart to lend me the blunt to start over. If I can pay some of my debtors and fix up the house, maybe Claire will return to me.”
Lady Amanda came up to join them. “Are you ready to debark, Ray?” She wound her arm in his and batted her eyelashes.
“You should see Claire before you do anything stupid,” Sophia advised. “Have you written to her since you left London?”
“She’s the one who left me; I saw no need to write.”
“I thought you wanted to borrow money to pay your debts and fix up the house.”
“Ray has no need of a house,” Amanda maintained. “He can stay with me.”
“Is that true, Ray? Have you fallen so low that you’d let a woman support you?”
Ray scowled at her. “Amanda offered me a temporary place to stay until I get back on my feet, and I accepted. What’s wrong with that?”
“You lied to me about needing money to fix up the house and win Claire back. You wanted money for your own selfish pursuits.”
Rayford did not reply.
Sophia felt compelled to issue a warning, whether or not Amanda heeded it. “If you have money, Lady Amanda, Ray will drain you dry. He has a legal wife, so marriage is out of the question, if you’re thinking along those lines.”
“Oh, pooh,” Amanda scoffed. “Ray’s wife left him; as far as I’m concerned, he’s free. Besides, he amuses me.”
“For how long?”
“See here, Sophia, you have no right to interfere in my affairs.” Ray said. “So what if I lied to you? You always were a selfish bitch. You never did anything I asked to help out the family.”
“Like prostitute myself?” Sophia asked sweetly. Without waiting for a reply, she strode toward the gangplank, which had just been run out. Casper joined her, his face beaming with excitement.
“What are we going to do once we debark?” he asked. “Shall we find an inn?”
Dusk was quickly approaching. “Do you know of a respectable inn where we can stay while we decide where we will settle?”
He shook his head. “The captain and I usually slept aboard ship when we were in port. We never stayed in London long.”
By the time their luggage arrived, darkness was descending. Sophia knew she had to make a quick decision. Amanda and Rayford had already hailed a hackney, and Lady Chester had sent word for the Chester coach to pick up her family.
“May we drop you someplace?” Agatha asked. “I do believe Amanda secured the only hackney available.”
Sophia made up her mind. “Christian wanted us to stay with his brother, the Earl of Standish. Do you know him?”
“Not personally, but my dear Chester is acquainted with him. His mansion is not far from our town house on Berkley Square in Mayfair.”
“Then Casper and I would be happy to accept your generous offer of transportation.”
They chatted about a half hour before the Chester coach lumbered out of the darkness. The baggage was quickly loaded in the boot as the Chester family, Sophia and Casper settled inside.
“Are you expected, Sophia dear?” Agatha asked.
“No, there was no time to send word ahead. Christian gave me a letter of explanation for his brother. We won’t be staying long, however, for I intend to find my own lodging.”
“Why ever for?” Agatha asked. “None of us will be staying in London long. All this nastiness in Jamaica will be over before you know it, and we can return home.”
Sophia said nothing. Casper could return, but she would not, even if Chris sent for her, which she seriously doubted. He didn’t have time for a wife, and Sophia had been the last woman in the world Chris would have wed had he been given a choice. She had literally been thrust upon him.
Sophia sat in silent contemplation while Agatha tried to control her exuberant children. Even Casper seemed excited, but that could be explained by his sudden freedom after the confinement of the ship. The coach rolled to a stop.
“Ah, here you are, Sophia. This is where Lord Standish and his wife Grace live.”
The coach door opened and the steps were let down. Casper scrambled out first and gawked at the house. “Is this where we’re staying? It’s a bloody mansion.”
“Watch your language, Casper,” Sophia chided. “We’ll stay here until we can find our own lodging. Don’t let the size frighten you.”
Sophia was somewhat intimidated herself. This was no mere town house. From what she could see of it, the Standish home was a gated mansion sitting well back from the street on a manicured lawn.
“Rather impressive, isn’t it?” Agatha said from the coach. “Shall I send my man to announce you?”
“No, thank you,” Sophia declined. “That won’t be necessary.”
If the earl turned her away, she didn’t want anyone witnessing her embarrassment. The coach rattled off, leaving Sophia, Casper and their luggage sitting before the imposing gate guarded by a stone lion on either side.
“Well, Casper, I suppose we had best find our way to the door.”
“What if the gate is locked?”
“Then you can climb over and announce our arrival. I’ve seen you scamper up the masts on the Intrepid. I doubt that little gate will hamper you.”
Casper grinned. “I can climb that in no time at all.”
“Let’s see if it’s locked first.” She tried the latch; it opened at her touch. “It wasn’t locked after all. Shall we find out if we’re welcome?”
Casper picked up one of the valises.
“Leave the lugg
age, Casper. If we’re not welcome, we won’t have to carry it back. And if we are welcome, someone will fetch it for us.”
She swung open the gate and strode resolutely up to the front door. Casper was but a step behind her. She grasped the brass knocker and banged it hard.
“That ought to bring someone.”
Indeed it did. A stately butler opened the door a few moments later. “How may I help you, madam?”
“You can fetch the earl for me, if you please,” Sophia said. “I carry a letter from his brother.”
“Captain Radcliff? He is in Jamaica, madam.”
“I know. Casper and I just arrived on the Mary Deare. We sailed from Jamaica nearly four weeks ago. I am the captain’s wife.”
“Wait here while I inform His Lordship of your arrival.”
He disappeared into the far reaches of the mansion. Sophia studied her surroundings. Lord Standish must be fabulously rich, she decided, impressed by the marble foyer supported by tall columns and decorated with statues and valuable pieces of art. Several candelabras illuminated even the darkest corners. A marble staircase leading to the second floor rose magnificently before her.
A man who looked a great deal like Chris, only older, approached from the direction in which the butler had disappeared.
Sophia had seen Chris’s brother a time or two during her Season but she’d never paid much attention to him, for he was already courting Grace. It was Chris who had caught her attention, and held it to this day.
“Sophia? Is Chris with you?”
“Chris is still in Jamaica, my lord. I carry a letter from him.”
“Who is the lad with you?”
“Casper, Chris’s ward.”
“Ah, yes, Chris has spoken of him. You must both be exhausted after your long voyage. Shall we go into the parlor while I read Chris’s letter? Then you can tell me what happened to bring you and Casper to London. Baxter, bring refreshments for Lady Sophia and young Casper. Better yet, take Casper to the kitchen. I’m sure Mrs. Humphreys can find something special for him.”