by Burke, Dez
“Exactly!” Maverick says, leaning forward and slamming a hand down on the small table between us. “That’s what makes it so fucking fantastic!”
“You’re a dog,” Hank tells him.
Maverick holds up his hands and laughs. “That doesn’t hurt my feelings one tiny bit. It suits me just fine.”
“Until you catch something…” Hank mumbles under his breath.
“Why am I in the firing line, anyway?” Maverick says. He jerks a thumb in my direction. “Levi’s the one who was named ‘Playboy of the Year’ in that magazine. Remember that black and white photo they ran? The one where he was wearing nothing but a cowboy hat covering his dick?” Maverick slaps his knee. “I might love the ladies, but at least my screwing around doesn’t make the national news.”
“A cheap tabloid magazine is not the national news,” I point out.
“It might as well be with the number of women who read those damn things. Everybody knows who the real dog is, Levi.” Maverick grins at me. “You’re just having an end-of-tour-slump. Take a couple of weeks off, put your feet up, spend time with your dog or whatever you do. By the time you’ve spent a month in the real world, you’ll be throwing yourself back in the tour life again. You just need some rest, that’s all.”
“Maybe,” I say.
I sit back against the leather and take off my hat. I place it on the seat beside me and run my hand through my still-damp hair.
Maverick’s right.
I’ve lived it up while on the road, but recently, I’ve been thinking more and more about who I was before my first album became an overnight sensation.
And about the woman who inspired my chart-topping song, Blue Eyes of Heaven.
“Maybe it’s best I stay laser-focused on the remaining tour,” I say. “It’s a pretty big deal. It could make or break me.”
Maverick waves a hand at me. “What do you mean? You’ve already made it. Look around at all this! You’re a superstar now.”
“In his own mind maybe,” Hank jokes. “Don’t give him the big head. We need to keep Levi’s feet firmly on the ground. I’ve been around this business long enough to see all the bad things that can happen when money and fame comes too quick.”
“That’s right,” I say. “I depend on you two to keep me grounded and sane. Speaking of sane, quit hogging all the beer and hand me another one. Or hell, just hand me a six-pack. After that show we put on tonight, we deserve it.”
Maverick grins and hands me another bottle of beer.
“That’s the spirit,” he says. “Party on, cowboy.”
3
Annie
I walk through the drugstore on my way to the pharmacy counter located at the back and notice someone has knocked a box of candy bars onto the tile floor. I reach down to pick them up while keeping an eye on a young woman in the cosmetics section.
“Do you need some help?” I offer, giving her a warm smile when she catches my eye.
She shows me the lip gloss she’s holding. “I’ve got a date tonight. Do you think this color of red is too dark?”
I smile and shake my head. “It’s been so long since I’ve been on a date, I don’t know what the girls are wearing anymore. I’m the wrong person to be asking.” I study her carefully. “I think you can pull it off, though. Although I’d recommend this other brand. It’s the same thing in different packaging. You’ll save a few bucks.”
“Thanks. I appreciate it.”
Interacting with the store’s customers is my favorite part of the job. It’s like being a bartender without dealing with all the drunks. I’m always shocked at the things people are willing to tell me.
People trust a pharmacist with all their dirty secrets.
I walk behind the pharmacy counter and nod to my co-worker, Tina, who is busy stocking shelves with prescription medications. She squeezes past me and nudges me playfully with her hip.
“Hey, girl. Or is it Miss Phillips now? Or should I just call you the ‘boss lady?’”
“You can call me Annie, same as before. Nothing’s changed.”
“It’s okay to give yourself a pat on the back, you know. You earned this promotion fair and square.”
“Thanks, Tina.”
I smile gratefully at her. Tina and I have been pharmacy technicians at the drugstore for five years. Now that I’ve been promoted to Head Pharmacist, I’m running the pharmacy.
“I’m glad you got the job,” Tina continues. “I think you’re going to be a great boss.”
“Let’s hope so. I don’t want to screw it up. You know I love this job.”
“And everyone loves you. Speaking of, there’s Cole Hamby.” She points toward the front door of the drugstore. “One of our most handsome and loyal customers. He looks like he needs some good loving. I volunteer as tribute.”
I follow Tina’s gaze to see Cole striding towards the counter with a grim expression on his face. Many years ago, I dated his brother, Levi. In recent years, things haven’t been easy for Cole, and we’ve become casual friends through his visits to the pharmacy.
“Good morning, Cole,” I say. “How are you today?”
Cole lets out a tired sigh. He’s an attractive man, with smoldering eyes and a smile so rare you feel honored to receive one. His dark eyes are tired, and he leans on the counter wearily, letting out a long breath as he fills me in.
“You know how it is when you’re dealing with Alzheimer’s,” he says. “There are good days and bad days it seems. I never know what to expect with Dad.”
“You’re doing a great job,” I tell him. “Dealing with dementia is never easy.”
He meets my eyes and smiles gratefully. “Yeah, I know. Thanks for saying that. I’m doing the best I can.”
“Are you here to pick up Edward’s prescriptions?”
“Yes, if you have them ready,” he replies. “I called them in last night. Every day or two he has a new one coming up for refill.”
I pull his father’s name up on the computer and disappear behind the counter to search for the prescription bottles. After running my eyes over the rows of labeled bottles, I find what I need. I return a few minutes later with a paper bag full of medications that I plop down on the counter in front of him.
“Do you have any question about the medications before I ring you up?” I ask.
“Yeah, one big question,” he says while checking the labels on the bottles. “Does any of this shit work? Dad’s on ten different medicines for everything from blood pressure to memory. I’m beginning to wonder if it’s all for the big drug companies to make the bucks.”
I think carefully before I answer.
“Some of it works, for sure,” I say. “The blood pressure medication for example.”
“And some of it doesn’t?” he asks, lifting his eyebrows.
I let out a long sigh. “If you want my personal and not professional opinion, I’m not sure the medications for memory work very long, if at all. It varies from person to person. A few months might be the best you can hope for. Every person is different.”
“I have to give it a try though, right? In case it helps Dad? He might be the one person the medicine works on.”
“Absolutely,” I say, nodding.
I don’t tell him I’ve wondered myself if some of the dementia medications aren’t more for the family to feel as if they’re doing something than to help the patient. It’s not my place to share my opinions on medications the physicians have ordered for their patients.
“You have to try,” I say. “It might work for your dad and nobody else. How is Edward doing lately?”
“The good days are getting fewer and further between. The bad days are getting more intense. It’s an emotional rollercoaster every damn day. Honestly, Annie, I don’t know how much longer I can take care of him at home by myself. Maybe if Lily wasn’t so young. She needs parenting too.”
He holds up his hands helplessly.
“I guess it’s just one of those tough situations,” h
e says. “There’s not a damn thing I can do but suck it up and keep on moving. I’m sure as hell not the first person to go through this kind of thing with aging parents. And I won’t be the last. There’s a whole generation of people living longer and losing their minds.”
“No, unfortunately, you’re not. And usually there’s one person in the family who shoulders the whole load. It’s the same way with everyone. I’m only a phone call away if you get into a jam,” I offer. “I can always sit with Lily or your dad if you need some time out or have stuff you need to get done.”
“Thanks, you’re a good friend to offer.”
I scan Cole’s face with concern. His exhaustion is beginning to show. His handsome face is drawn with tiredness, with worry lines taking the place of laughter creases that used to be around his eyes.
It can’t be easy for him, caring for his elderly father, and being a single dad to his four-year-old daughter too.
“How is Lily doing?” I ask.
“Pretty good, I think. She loves preschool. She has a little boyfriend called Tommy. She struggles a bit at home, though. I think Dad scares her sometimes when he gets confused and loud. He scares me too if I’m honest about it. One minute he’ll be sweet as sugar and the next yelling about hearing an imaginary person banging on a window outside.”
“She’s too young to understand what’s going on. How’s Levi taking all this with your dad?”
Cole raises his eyebrows in amusement. Being asked about his superstar brother constantly must be a bit of a joke.
“Ah, yes, Levi. I wondered when you would get around to asking about him. Everyone does sooner or later.”
“Is he still touring?”
“The first leg is about over,” he replies. “He was at a big music festival in Nashville this weekend. As a headliner, not even a supporting act this time around. He’s going big places, the way he always wanted.”
“Wow, that’s incredible,” I say.
“Incredible for him, maybe. Not so much for the family he left behind. Trying to get hold of him is like yelling into a deep black hole of nothing. He hasn’t called me back in days.”
“He must be crazy busy with his touring schedule.”
“Maybe,” he replies in a bitter voice. “Just how long does replying to a text take, though? Ten seconds? You’d think he’d want to check on Dad more often to see how he’s doing. If he cared about him, or us.”
“I’m sure he doesn’t realize how serious the situation with your dad has become. You know what’s going on because you’re with him every day. Hearing about how things are and seeing it with your own eyes are two different things. I doubt Levi realizes how much Edward has changed in the past few months.”
“That’s because he hasn’t been around to see,” he says, almost angrily. “And I’m not sure he’d give a shit if he did. Actions speak louder than words. This is our Dad. The man who taught us everything we know.”
“Don’t say that,” I say, quick to defend the man I once loved. “Levi loves his family. He always did.”
“You could fool me because he’s not acting that way right now. I know he’s in denial about Dad, but still. That’s not a good excuse. You can’t just pretend bad things aren’t happening. Things need to be faced head on and dealt with. No matter how important you think your damn career is.”
Cole hangs his head in disappointment over his brother’s behavior.
“I tried calling him no less than five times last week,” he says. “He didn’t take a single call. Didn’t even shoot me back a text. Didn’t reply to one voicemail. He knows that Dad’s not well. He could’ve died and Levi wouldn’t even know.”
“That doesn’t sound like Levi,” I say, frowning. “Maybe you’ll hear from him when the festival ends.”
“Oh, I’ll hear from him one way or the other,” he says roughly. “And when I do, I’m going to tell him to get his sorry ass back home where he’s needed.”
“You are?”
My heart skips a beat. It’s been a long time since I last saw Levi Hamby.
Too long.
Last time we were together, we were madly in love. That was seven years ago before he was a household name and playing non-stop on the radio.
“I am. I’m not holding my breath though,” Cole says. “We’ve only had Christmas and Easter together for the last seven years. I can’t see him suddenly dropping everything now to come home for a visit.”
“Edward wasn’t this sick before,” I remind him.
“I’ll talk to him, and hopefully something I say will get through. I need his help right now. It’s too much for me to handle on my own with Dad, Lily, the farm. I’m spreading myself too thin. Something is bound to fall through the cracks sooner or later.”
He sighs, then offers an apologetic smile and holds up his hand.
“I’m sorry to dump all this shit on you. I don’t have many people to talk to these days. Adults, that is. The cows are tired of hearing me bitch and moan to them. They eat their feed and then just walk away.”
“Don’t be sorry. That’s what friends are for. And my offer stands. I’ll help you out however I can.”
“I might just take you up on that if I get into a pickle. I appreciate the offer.” Cole picks up his prescription and takes his weight off the counter with a reluctant sigh. “I better get back to the farm. I hate leaving Dad for long.”
“See you then.”
Cole leaves and I watch the door after he’s gone, feeling sorry for him. The whole world is on his shoulders right now. It takes me a moment to stop thinking about Cole and his family and get my mind back on work. Before I can get started on my next task, Tina appears.
“God, Cole Hamby is still handsome as ever,” she says with a dreamy gaze. “Those blue eyes are killer. I would make a great stepmom to his little girl.”
I smile at her. “I guess he is handsome. I never thought of him that way. Only as Levi’s older brother.”
“Well, I’d say he’s as handsome as Levi. Personally, I prefer my men a little older than us. It’s a shame Cole never picked up a guitar. He’d have given his brother a run for his money.”
“No, Cole is a family man. I can’t see him ever leaving this town or his farm.”
Tina rests her elbow on the counter and her eyes glaze over in fantasy. “Imagine having a brother that huge. Do you think Cole could get me tickets to one of Levi’s shows?”
“It wouldn’t hurt to ask,” I tell her. “I’m sure you wouldn’t be the first person to try.”
“Maybe I will. Levi is so sexy. I fell in love when I heard his first song. That deep voice of his. And that muscled body! Did you see his picture in that magazine? Those six-pack abs kill me. He must work out for hours a day now.”
I turn away and busy myself with preparing prescriptions. Tina doesn’t know Levi and I were once a couple. My romance with Levi was a long time ago.
But not long enough that I don’t remember every little detail.
Levi Hamby is a man a girl could never forget.
4
Levi
After months of living in a tour bus, it’s a relief to be in one place for more than a single night. I feel like a kid on spring break from school with a full month’s vacation before the next tour leg begins.
I’m staying in a five-star hotel in Nashville in the penthouse suite while the new house I bought right outside of town is undergoing construction renovations.
The view is fantastic from the top floor of the hotel. I see everything I ever dreamed of spread out before me, sparkling in the darkness. From my viewpoint, I can see the Cumberland River and the glow of lights in the water.
I can see the blinking neon signs of smoky dive bars. I can even see one of the first music venues I ever played at when I arrived in Nashville and the other bigger bars that came later.
If my damn double-paned windows could open, I would hear the sweet sounds of Broad Street, the crowds and the voices of eager new musicians belting
out soulful country songs with everything they have in them.
A map of my entire music career glistens down below. The view humbles me and makes me a tad bit nostalgic.
It’s been a damn, hard road to get here.
I pour a glass of complimentary, expensive whiskey from a decanter on the oak sideboard. It goes down smoothly in one big gulp and reminds me of the nights I used to drink with my buddies back in Georgia.
Of course, back then it was the cheapest whiskey we could find mixed up with good times I’ll never forget.
After drinking the whiskey, I tell myself if one glass is good, two would be even better. I pour myself a double this time and sink down onto the leather sofa facing out over the city.
The cushions are hard as a rock and I frown, trying to find a better position to sit in. At five hundred dollars a night, you would think the furniture would be a little more comfortable.
As I’m shuffling around in irritation, I notice my cellphone flashing on the glass coffee table in front of me.
It’s Cole again.
This time, there’s no excuse not to answer.
I’m not in the middle of a show. There are no wild women swarming me. Even Harry is somewhere else, for which I’m thankful. I pick up the cell and see Cole is attempting a video call. I switch on my own camera and answer.
“Hey, Cole. How are you doing, big brother?”
His expression is serious and unimpressed. I can see he’s sitting in the kitchen of the farmhouse. A wave of homesickness hits me in the gut. It’s been so long since I was home.
“You are alive, then,” he says. “I was beginning to wonder if you were being held captive in an underground cave somewhere without cellphone reception. I was almost ready to call the Youngblood bounty hunters to search for you.”
“Yeah, sorry,” I say with a sheepish grin. “I’ve been hard to reach. It’s been crazy here lately.”
“Hard to reach is a bit of an understatement. It’s easier to set up a golf date with Donald Trump than to get you on the phone.”