“In fact, I think use in the cleaning unit is appropriate,” the doctor agrees. He would need a fifth generation designation, even though he is a bit older than that cohort.”
A489 turns to A244. “Is there a free name?”
A233 takes a look at the portable monitor in front of him. “The number 577 has been unoccupied for several months.”
How can a name be unoccupied? What happened to the former owner?
“So it’s decided, the outcast will be named D577.”
Never. No matter what name they give him, he will always be Finn to me. And I will ensure that he is reminded of this name.
Another Legion commander who is rarely involved in discussions now speaks, “We should arm ourselves against future attacks of the kind he instigated.”
“We have doubled our patrols,” said one of the top fighters, but that’s not enough for the Legion commander. I remember his name, A333.
“I bet the Eastern Legion also increased its patrols, and yet it did not protect them from attack. In my opinion, we should stop the rebels while it is still possible.”
“What do you mean?” I exclaim, which instantly reaps dirty looks from all sides.
“The outcasts must be silenced. We have been waiting for far too long,” A489 agrees.
“You cannot be serious. He was alone and threw stones. It was an act of desperation and was never a threat,” I call out, appalled. “The other outcasts had nothing to do with what he did. You cannot punish them for his madness.”
“He may have been alone, but he may have just been the first of many who will now follow his example. We must set an example of our own.”
“Why would anyone want to follow him? The outcasts think he is dead.”
“And maybe they are planning an act of revenge, maybe they will ally with the outcasts of the north and east.”
I shake my head stubbornly. “I could talk to them. They know and trust me. I could reassure them that Finn is alive. They would listen to me.”
My proposal yields nothing but outrage. “It is not we who have to ask for forgiveness, but them. We offered them the opportunity of a carefree life, but they throw stones at us. They endanger the lives of those in the safety zone.”
I desperately search for words, even though they have already made their judgment and nothing I say will change their minds.
“They only have a false picture of the Legion as you only have a false picture of them. I could discuss and clarify the misunderstandings.”
“The time for negotiations is long over. Now is the time for action.”
The others nod in agreement while I shake my head in disbelief at A489’s words.
A489 grins toward me triumphantly. “Alright, let’s vote. Who is for destroying the outcasts?”
Nineteen hands stand out. Only A566 and I dissent. Again, he is the only one who stands with me. Even A350 has conspired against me. I do not think for one more second that I am welcome in this hall. Enraged I jump up and rush out, gasping for air like a fish on land. This cannot be true. I need to find a way to avoid bloodshed, no matter what.
09. FRIENDS IN NEED
I cannot eat or sleep. I feel completely powerless. There must be a way to warn the rebels before the attack. Unfortunately, I do not know exactly when it will take place since I could not control myself and left the conference before the end. Now I’m not happy, but I will find the date out soon enough. More importantly, what should I do? Of course I could ask A566 to accompany me to the caves, but I cannot possibly put the lives of the rebels into the hands of a stranger. Although A566 did not vote for the attack, the risk to him would be too great, he would be seen as an accomplice, accused of treason, just like I would be. No, it would not be fair to impose that kind of burden on him.
I wish that I could talk to Finn, Zoe, and Clyde, maybe they would know more. But Finn doesn’t even remember his own name and Zoe is sitting like a prisoner in the sickbay. If I told her about the Legion commander’s plans, it would be just another torture for her because there is nothing she could do about it.
Nevertheless, I yearn for my close friends. Since it is impossible to see them face to face, I decide to go into the control room to at least see them on the monitor.
The control room is not far from my room at the end of the hallway. Just before I enter, I stop at the last moment as I hear a faint hubbub. There are two male voices I recognize immediately: A489 and A566.
“What happened to your priorities? You used to be one of us!” A489 said to A566.
“I am one of the best, if not the best,” A566 replies confidently.
“Oh of course,” the older man exclaims sarcastically before getting serious again. “You’ve changed since she became a commander. Why?”
Are they talking about me?
“In the past you stood by my side. We agreed on what should be done with the outcasts, and today you agree with the traitor?”
“She’s new, I’m only helping her find her way around,” A566 says, unimpressed, I can hear his cheeky grin in his voice.
“You’re unreliable, that’s all,” A489 exclaims angrily. “What do you want from her? Let me at least understand!”
What A566 says to him, I cannot understand as he seems to whisper it. It may have only been a few words because in the next moment A489 is furious. “You are mad! Get a grip or you will have to solve your own problems from here on out.”
I can just press against the wall to avoid being seen by A489 as he leaves the control room. I breathe with relief because he did not notice me. However, I hesitate to walk into the control room myself. A566 has been in a lot of trouble because of me. He risked a lot for me, and yet I still have a feeling that he has not been completely honest with me. I am waiting to see what he says I owe him.
Slowly I step into the room. “Hey,” I greet him kindly. But he turns around, startled, as if I caught him doing something forbidden. On the monitor in front of him is surveillance footage of the interior of a room, but I am too far away to be able to say what room it is.
It does not take A566 a second to regain his composure. “Good to see you, I would have expected you to be here already.”
His statement surprised me. “Why?”
He winks at me mischievously. “I suppose you need my help. Where should we go today? How about back to the sickbay? Or the safety zone? How about just outside the Legion?”
Is he serious? From his attitude, I realize that he is ready to leave. To him, this all seems to be some kind of grand adventure. An escape from everyday life in which he can avoid the warnings of A489. His offer is tempting. In fact, I madly yearn to see Finn. But A350 has already caught me seeing him once. Who knows what would happen if she caught me a second time. In addition, A566 would be in more trouble and I do not want to owe him any more than I already do. So I shake my head. “No, not today, but thanks for the offer.”
He acts like he is honestly disappointed. “I’ll help you. Getting in trouble doesn’t bother me. I’ve been looking forward to this all day.”
His commitment touches me and I give him a timid smile. “Because of me, you have enough problems,” I am trying to avoid him.
“You overheard the conversation I just had with A489?” he asks indignantly, but then he starts to grin. “Wicked girl.”
“I was not listening. It was a coincidence. I wanted to come to the control room anyway,” I defend myself.
“You could have covered you ears,” A566 replies, shrugging, but then makes a dismissive gesture. “I’m not worried. I have everything under control!”
He really seems to be sure of himself. “Not today it seems.”
This time, he just raises his hands in defense, “Not possible. He who does not want it, already has it.”
Without another glance, he leaves the room. Did I really offend him? I try not to think about it, and turn the monitor on in front of me. The bottom right of the screen flickers with the name of the resident. It’s D560. Why w
as he looking in her room? Is there something between those two? She warned me about him before, but why?
Lost in thought, I let my finger slide on the control board and move the dial to the name D577. An image of a room in the safety zone appears. Finn is lying on his bed fast asleep. The beds in the safety zone control the sleep of the inhabitants. Once it’s bedtime, a gas is released from the ceiling forcing the residents to sleep. Simultaneously, the sensors of the bed intercept any kind of dreams. That is, Finn will not even be able to remember his dreams.
He lies on the bed like a robot with the power off. He is completely motionless and without any emotion on his face. My fingertips touch the screen at the place where his body is. I glide my finger across his chest and would like to be able to feel the warmth of his skin. Already it is no longer as brown as it was in the caves. The Legion must somehow be able to manipulate our eye color and hair growth. But even if they gave him a new face, I would be able to recognize him. My heart would feel it and I believe that he feels the same way. Maybe he cannot even explain it, but he must have the same affection for me as I feel about him,
With a heavy heart, I renounce Finn and let my fingers further glide to D523. Unlike Finn, Zoe is not asleep. The sight of her makes me shiver. She sits in a corner of her cell and has her legs pulled to her body while she wraps her knees with her arms. Her head leans against the wall and is raised looking to the ceiling. Her lips move slightly. At first I think she’s talking, but then I recognize the nature of her movements. She is singing. Tears run down her cheeks. She must be feeling really sad as I’ve always known her to be strong. Even when I didn’t know anything about the rebels or Zoe’s identity, I always admired her. I even longed to be something like her. In a way she was my role model but now seeing her suffer like this, it makes my heart clench up.
I move a dial on the control board and it shows the view from right outside Zoe’s cell. As expected, Clyde stands right out in front. He is leaning his head against the door as though he is listening to Zoe’s singing. He looks anything but happy. He seems to literally be suffering with her. It’s amazing how close those two have become. Zoe’s words are like fairy tales from a strange world for Clyde. How many other residents of the safety zone would act the same way? Before the kidnapping, I had hung on her every word and absorbed everything she told me, like a sponge absorbs water.
Strange that I initially believed Clyde would be the rebels’ contact man. No one else has the same dreamy essence as him. The rebels are all realists. They have experienced too much to allow themselves to dream.
The realization hits me like a blow. That’s it! Why did not I not immediately realize it? I only have to contact the rebels’ contact in the Legion about the attack. She will surely pass it on. Spasmodically, I try to remember her name, but all I can think of is her face before my eyes. She was a generation older than me and in the combat unit, so she would be C4... something. Frantically, I start to press buttons on the control board. I hope she is not currently on duty, otherwise she could be anywhere in the Legion. I don’t need to check the men, so she could be one of 49 or 50 possibilities. The first woman I see I’m sure is not her, but already after the first four I have the feeling that they all look alike. I close my eyes and try to call up her image in my memory. Was there anything unique about her? Something that sets her apart from everyone else?
Of course, she had the same bald head and blue eyes as everyone else, but there was something different in her face. Her nose? No, it was perfectly shaped like everyone else’s. Her mouth? My finger brushes over my lips. My index finger remains on my upper lip. That’s it! She had a scar. Her skin there was whiter there than the rest of her body and therefore stood out easily.
Hastily I cycle through the remaining digits and find myself stopping on C403. I found her. This is the woman that can contact the rebels. She is my only hope.
I’m not even in my room for five minutes when there is a knock at the door. Astonished, I look at the monitor to see who is just beyond the door. It shows me the image of D560. I open the door and look at her questioningly.
“I am to guard you again tonight,” she tells me.
Slightly annoyed, I raise my eyebrows. “Again?”
She nods and walks timidly past me into the room. It is too late when I realize that she could interpret my response wrong. My disappointment had nothing to do with her.
“I’m sorry; it’s nothing against your company. I cannot understand why A350 wants me monitored. She no longer seems to trust me.”
D560 puts her head slightly askew as she answers. “She said it was for your own safety. I’m sure she just wants the best for you.”
“Yes, what she considers to be the best,” I reply reluctantly. “She does not care about what I want.”
I let myself fall on the bed. “You know, I thought as a Legion commander I would finally have more freedom in the safety zone, but I was wrong. I’m basically as stuck as I was before; the only difference now is that I have a beautiful view.”
“Well, you can decide who is allowed to enter your room and who is not,” D560 replies, I can hear the envious tone of her voice. She must think I’m spoiled. No one in the safety zone has it as good as I do and yet I always find a reason to complain.
“Shall we sleep?”
She nods with a timid smile and this time lies down beside me in the bed.
However, instead of sleeping, she looks at me hesitantly. “I’m glad that I can be with you.”
Her confession touched me. Apparently she is slowly beginning to open up to me. I answer her with a smile. “And I’m glad that you’re here.”
The next morning I’m one of the first awake and eating breakfast. I see A350 and without hesitation, I head toward her.”
“Good morning.”
Frowning, she looks at me suspiciously. “Good morning, can I do something for you?”
She seems to see through my kindness immediately. “Yes, I want to monitor the food distribution system in the safety zone,” I say it straight out. It’s the perfect way to meet both Finn and the rebel contact.
“No way,” A350 replies bitterly. Apparently she is still mad at me.
“But it’s my project!”
“You are not as important as you think,” she calmly replied and walks past me to leave the breakfast room. But she will not get rid of me that easily. Hastily I run after her. “Legion commanders are important. Those people look up to us. They rely on us blindly. I want to see how the people react to the new arrangement.”
Annoyed she sighs. “Okay, you’ve convinced me,” she admits defeat. “You have half an hour. I will take you myself.”
Obediently I nod and refrain from shouting triumphantly. We stand on the elevator and she operates it with her thumbprint.
“It goes without saying that I do not want you wandering around the entire safety zone. You only have permission for the atrium,” she reminds me when the doors open.”
“Of course,” I agree with her. She rolls her eyes, annoyed. Apparently she does not believe a word I say, but I do not care as long as she lets me go.
While the elevator slides into the safety zone, my heart frantically begins beating faster. I think of Finn. Will he remember me? Maybe a part of his memory has returned. If so, he’ll give me a sign, I’m sure of it.
The doors slide open and I step out into my old home. Today, the walls of the atrium show a rainforest while from the speakers is the sound of a gentle lapping of rain and wind. Before the three food counters, lines have already formed. There are no crowds. Everything runs completely free of complication. My project is expected to be a great success. Under these conditions, it will not be long until I get the approval to serve real food.
At the end of the left line, I see Finn in his brown suit. I walk up to him and welcome other safety zone residents with a friendly nod.
Finn only notices me when I stand right next to him, however he does not seem pleased to see me.
“Finn,” I whisper to him while smiling.
He looks at me as though I had lost my mind and backs away, “Why do you call me that? My designation is D577,” he replies irritably.
“Do you not remember?” I ask him patiently. “You are Finn and I’m Cleo. We belong together.”
He shakes his head stubbornly. “Leave me alone!”
He advances in the line, ignoring me. Does he really not remember me or is he acting? When he woke up, he seemed happy to see me.
“Do you not remember Cleo? Cleo which rises with the sun? I was with you when you woke up.”
“I remember that. It was you who woke me up early. Because of you, they had to stun me again,” he says angrily. The Legion’s brainwashing must have been a success.
“I did not want you to be alone when you woke up.”
“That would have been better for me.”
“No, it isn’t. If you could remember anything about your past, you would be sorry,” I assure him.
But the more I say, the angrier he gets. “But I cannot remember and I do not want to. Just stay away from me!”
His words are like a slap in the face. Bravely I urge back the lump in my throat and grab again for his arm. “I will never give up on you, whether it pleases you or not.”
Furious, he breaks away from me. “Do not touch me! You’re crazy! Leave me alone!” He shouts toward me. All of the other residents of the safety zone turn toward us.
Reassuringly, I raise my hands. “Everything’s okay.”
Although it hurts, I have to accept that I will not get my Finn back today. I back away and start searching the crowd for C403, the rebel contact. There are not many fighters in the atrium at the moment. Hastily, I search through three lines in search of her, but do not see her. Desperately, I look around the atrium, when suddenly someone touches me on the shoulder. Startled, I turn around and look Clyde right in the face. I have not seen him in a while, he looks worried.
“Why haven’t you contacted me?” He accuses me. I see dark shadows under his eyes. He has not been sleeping.
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