What the fuck just happened, Sabrina? Last night you couldn’t decide if you hated the guy, and this morning you’re begging him to fuck you.
I’m a fucking idiot.
My brain stops working when he’s around me. When he looks at me with that hunger in his eyes, it’s the same hunger I feel deep down inside. I’m drawn to him, I always have been. But the flame isn’t good for the moth, just like Ax isn’t good for me.
I feel hollow, worn out, empty. I wish I could numb my feelings for good, but not if it leaves a hole inside of me like this.
The bedroom door cracks open. “Mommy? Is that you?”
Plastering on a smile, I go to the door and drop to my knees. “Yes, honey. It’s just me.” Putting my arms around her, I kiss her forehead, reminding myself that Ax and I did do one thing right. We made our daughter.
“Where did you go? Was that Daddy’s voice I heard?”
Daddy’s voice. When did she start calling Ax ‘Daddy’? I’m not sure how I feel about it, but it’s true, isn’t it?
“Mommy went to get some coffee. You know how I am in the morning. And yes, I was talking to your father.”
Lex wipes her eyes and blinks up at me. “Are we going to hang out together today? Me and you and Daddy?”
Her question hurts something inside me. Her longing is so transparent, and I hate being the one who has to crush her dreams. I can’t spend the day with Ax. Being that close to him for so long will destroy me. I need something else to cling to, to make me feel more normal, more in control.
“I had something else in mind for us today. How about you come to work with me today, and I show you the ropes. A take your adorable daughter to work day. How about that?”
Despite the fake cheer in my voice, Lex doesn’t bite. “But I was thinking about swimming in the pool today. Miss Leigh says there’s a diving board and everything.”
“Honey, we’ll have plenty of time to hit the pool after work.”
Her little face screws up with disappointment, and I almost feel sorry for what I’m doing. But I can’t let my daughter out of my sight. I need to keep her by my side, so that means she’s coming with me. And I guess I’m not above blackmail to get my way. Maybe I’m just as bad as Ax.
“If you don’t want to come to work with me, I suppose you could go back to school. Since we aren’t headed to the farm, you could go back and—”
“Mom, please take me with you to work today.”
It looks like I’m getting my way, even though it doesn’t feel as good as I thought it would. “Okay, baby. Let’s hit the shower.” Unfortunately, with a lack of clothes, we were going to look as crappy as we felt.
We’re headed for the front door when Ax stops us. “Where are you going?”
I hike the strap of my bag up onto my shoulder and then put my arm around my daughter. “Work. Some of us have to, you know?”
“Point of fact, you don’t have to.”
“I’m out of vacation and sick leave. I need a paycheck.”
“Sabrina, you’re not listening. I—”
“You’re not listening. We’re going.”
His face darkens. His mouth opens once, then twice, and then he shakes his head. “Fine,” he grits through his teeth. “But you’re taking your bodyguard with you.”
“We don’t need a bodyguard.” I turn to go, pulling on the big door to open it, but Ax advances and closes the door before I can exit.
“You’re taking Luke, or you’re not going.”
“Ax, so help me God, I’ll—”
“I’d like to come,” drawls a voice from the doorway to the dining room. “There’s nothing to do hanging around here but get lost in this big ole place.”
I pause, studying my appointed bodyguard. Luke is tall, muscled, and powerful, like a mountain lion, all coiled strength. But his face is open, unassuming. He’s like a big brother who you wouldn’t want to cross.
I look back at Ax, and his face is blank, but his eyes are full of some unnameable emotion. It’s a compromise, a way for Ax to feel in control. And at least he won’t be hovering over me all day, tempting me with his closeness.
I let out a sigh. “Fine. But I’m not waiting around here. I don’t want to be late.” Sure, I’m usually late more than half of the time, the perils of being a single mother, but he doesn’t need to know that.
“I’m ready now,” Luke replies.
I jerk my head at him, motioning for him to fall in line. “Then you’re driving.” It’s not like I have a car here anyway.
Ax takes his hand off the door, allowing me to open it, but before Luke can pass, he grabs him by the arm.
“You keep them safe. And if there is even a whiff of trouble, you need to let me know ASAP.”
“Understood.”
Heading out the door, I pick my way past the two guys dressed in black, stationed at the front door. I wonder if they’re the same guys from yesterday, but I don’t pay enough attention to confirm whether they are.
“Come on, baby,” I say, approaching the SUV.
“Can I ride up front?”
“Honey, kids shouldn’t ride in the front. How about we both ride in the back together?”
She nods, but without excitement. I open the door and help boost her inside, then climb in after her. Our driver slides behind the wheel and starts up the car. “Where are we headed, ladies?”
As I give him directions, he pilots the SUV down the hill and toward the center of town. Cape Craven seems more active today than usual. Then we pull past The Office, and I realize why. Craven Industries is crawling with people. Reporters and media vans. Looky-loos and concerned citizens.
It seems what Ax said really has come to pass. Craven Industries is in trouble. And its former CEO is MIA.
The foundation is only a few blocks away, and it has its own legions to deal with. The crowd is much smaller, but heads begin to turn when I climb out of the SUV.
Luke is in front of me in a heartbeat when they start to approach. I pull Lex in tight, suddenly regretting my idea to come to the office. This is anything but routine.
“Do you have any information on the whereabouts of Brent Craven?”
“No comment,” Luke says, answering for me.
“Is the foundation defunct without a Craven at the helm?”
If the press only knew how little input the Cravens have provided over the years. I don’t give answers, instead hurrying forward to the stairs and up into the door. Luke sweeps around the office, but the only person inside is Ms. Birch.
“Are they all still out there?” the older woman says, moving past me to look out the window. She looks more frazzled than I’ve ever seen her. “What is this madness?”
“Craven Industries has hit a rough patch,” I murmur as I lead my daughter to my desk. This is not the way I expected the day to start. Nor is it how I expected Birch to act. She isn’t the type to keep quiet when I do something out of the ordinary. Her not jumping on my bringing Lex to work is a huge red flag, as backward as that sounds.
Birch hovers for a moment, fidgeting, but when I calmly log in and get Lex situated in the desk across from mine, she heads back to her own station. Luke finds an open desk and claims it, leaning back to put his feet up on the desk. Birch doesn’t say a word in protest.
It seems somewhat foolish to focus on work now since everything with the Cravens is so up in the air. The foundation might be done for if the Cravens are no longer in charge of the company their family built. Despite all of this, it feels good to be out of Ax’s orbit, even if just for a few hours.
Being in his childhood home could become oppressive, especially if I know he’s stalking the halls, waiting for me. What’s between the two of us, the need that burns in the both of us, is so powerful that it easily overcomes common sense. Just look at what happened this morning. We gave into our passions in the family kitchen, and anyone, our daughter included, could have walked in on us. But rational thinking goes out the window when Ax touches m
e.
I can’t let it happen again. I’ve got to be strong, got to find a way out for my daughter and me. When all this shit dies down, maybe I can reconsider, but for now, all I want is to get away and take a breath on my own. If I can get some distance, maybe I can get some perspective too.
It’s almost lunchtime. I’m boring Lex with yet another spreadsheet software trick when I notice Birch at the window again. She’s been finding her way to the window every half hour or so, keeping an eye on what’s going on outside. “Someone’s here.”
I turn to watch Luke join Birch at the window. “She’s right.”
I put my head in my hands, refusing to go to the window. Just for once, can’t I have a boring day at work like the rest of the world?
When the office door opens, I realize the answer is no.
49
Ax
The SUV is pulling down the driveway when I hear her coming down the stairs. “What’s got you looking out the window like a lost and lonely puppy?”
Ignoring my stepmother, I stalk into the kitchen, trying to get a hold on my temper. Why does Sabrina insist on leaving, time and time again? What’s it going to take to convince her to stay?
I’m not sure if I’ll ever find the answer to that question. Which means I’m doomed to feel this way, unfulfilled, full of longing.
Fuck that.
“Isn’t it a shame? You’ve brought them to the lap of luxury, the nicest place in this dogshit town, and not an ounce of gratitude.”
“Leigh, I’m not in the mood.”
My stepmother, a woman who is years younger than me, slinks to where I stand in front of the coffee pot. “I’m sorry. I wasn’t aware that you had any mood besides ‘asshole.’”
I close my eyes and count to ten. When I open them, she’s standing there with a smirk on her beautiful face. “Come on, Ax. Why are you torturing yourself like this? She wants to go. You should let her.”
I pin her with my glare. “Just let her take my daughter and go? Never knowing if I’ll see them again? I don’t think so.”
“If your daughter is all you’re worried about, then worry no more. The Cravens have billions to sink into a custody case. You could claim sole custody, easy peasy.”
“You’re one cold-hearted bitch, you know that?”
A slow smile spreads across her features. “I’ll take that as a compliment.”
“You’ve forgotten one thing. I’m cut off from the family fortune, remember?”
Leigh laughs. “Oh, yeah. That is a bummer.” She moves closer and extends a perfectly manicured finger to touch my chest. “But then again, that’s something that can be dealt with.”
I look down at her, expressionless. “Meaning?”
“Well, your brother isn’t exactly Number One Son anymore, is he? You’re not looking so bad in comparison anymore.”
I have an idea of where Leigh is going, but I want to hear it all straight from the horse’s mouth.
“In case you haven’t noticed, and I don’t know how you could have missed it since you’re his primary caregiver, but my father isn’t exactly in the headspace to go rearranging his will, now is he?”
Leigh’s eyes narrow. “True. But I’m sure you and I can work something out in the meantime until your father is back on his feet.”
I’ve always considered my young stepmother to be an opportunist, which is why her offering to help me now doesn’t exactly make sense. “What’s in it for you?”
“You’re my family now, dear Ax,” she says, cupping my face. “I just want to help you keep your little family together.”
“And to do so, you’re suggesting I rip my daughter away from her mother, the only person she’s depended on her entire life?”
Leigh rolls her eyes. “Don’t tell me you’re getting all self-righteous on me now. Sabrina’s a nice girl, but she’s just that, a nice girl. Sure, she was probably all sweet and innocent in high school, but you’re a big boy now, and that’s not what you need, is it?”
“You don’t have any idea what I need.”
“That’s not true.” She inches closer, her red lips pouting. “You need a woman who knows what it’s like. A woman who comes from a wealthy family, who understands the unique pressure of surviving a dynastic empire.”
Turning away, I toss my empty mug in the kitchen sink hard enough for it to shatter. “I’d advise you to stop pretending that you know who I am. I’ve accepted that my father felt the need for a little trophy wife for his masculinity when it was beginning to fade, but that doesn’t mean I consider you family. Stay out of my way, and leave Sabrina and Lex alone, or you’ll regret joining the Craven family. I guarantee it.”
She doesn’t follow when I leave, a much-needed relief. Although I haven’t figured out Leigh’s game yet, I have to admit she’s more transparent than I would have expected. Flirting with the son while the father rots in his sickbed. She may come from money, but she’s still a gold-digging bitch.
I put my stepmother out of my mind, writing her off as a minor annoyance. Brent’s my real target. I need to locate him, to figure out what his next step is. Turning over my dad’s office seems the next logical step. Brent seemed to be using it as his own. Maybe there’s a clue to his whereabouts there.
I dig through drawers and root around in the papers on the desk, but I come up with nothing but more questions. Many of the documents are discussing proposals from overseas manufacturers. Craven is an All-American brand, and it has been for decades. My father would never entertain offers for moving offshore, despite the possibility for higher profits.
One company seems to dominate, a Korean conglomerate with far-reaching interests. Scanning one proposal, I pull out the major bullet points. Moving Craven Industries manufacturing to Vietnam would save hundreds of billions of dollars per year, or so the proposal suggests. I toss it down, grimacing. Could Brent have been seriously considering these proposals? Dad would never allow it, and when he was in charge of the show, neither would the board. So what did Brent think he was doing?
After an hour I shuffle out of the office, defeated. I feel impotent, frustrated. How can I move on from the mess I’ve made of my life if I can’t resolve my issues with my brother?
When I re-enter the hall, I see Chuck headed in the direction of my father’s rooms. Following him, I push my way into my dad’s bedroom right behind him. Chuck’s eyes widen, but he doesn’t say a word.
Dad is propped up against a mound of pillows, his eyes drooping and a drop of drool shining on his chin. I hate seeing him like this. Chuck moves forward, and I see a small cup of pills in his hands.
“Wait,” I say, extending my hand. “Let me do it.”
“I’m supposed to do it,” he replies. “Your mom’s orders.”
“My mom has been dead for years,” I reply. “She used to like you, you know that? When your grandpa used to bring you around, she always made sure to whip up a batch of cookies for you. Said they didn’t feed you enough.”
Chuck frowns. “Your mom was a nice lady.”
“And my stepmother is nothing like her.”
Chuck stares at me. “She’s in charge now.”
“Why? Because she says so?”
“Your brother is gone.”
“I’m here.”
Chuck stands there, staring. After another minute, he hands the cup to me. “Things haven’t been right around here since you left. My granddad said it then, and I’ll say it now.”
“I know,” I say, my voice soft. “But I’m here now, and I’m ready to put things right.”
Chuck nods, then shows himself out of the room. Before he goes, he turns back. “I hope you stick around this time. For all our sakes.”
When he’s gone, I empty the pills into my pocket and toss the cup in the trash. Then I pull a chair over to my father’s bed and grasp his hand.
It takes almost an hour for him to start to come around. “Alexander?”
“Yeah, Dad. It’s me.”
He
blinks, then runs his hands through his hair. “Was it yesterday that we were talking on the balcony?”
“No, Dad. It’s been a while.”
“That’s what I thought.” He looks pained. “I can’t keep track of the time. It just…all runs together.”
“It’s the pills.” Once I start, I can’t stop. “Brent’s been keeping you drugged up, maybe Leigh too, I don’t know. But the pills are designed to interact negatively, to keep your brain scrambled, while my brother fucks your company over.”
“What are you talking about?” he grumbles. “You and your brother always were way too jealous. If one got something the other one didn’t, you’d throw a fit until your mother gave in. She was always coddling you both. Now look at you.”
“Dad, we’re not kids anymore. And if you don’t believe me, just have a look.”
I grab a remote and turn on the flat screen affixed to the wall across from the bed. Finding a 24-hour news channel, I let it play.
“Ousted CEO Brent Craven has still yet to make a statement, but if we take a look at the aggregate share prices of Craven Industries since he’s taken over for his ailing father, the numbers speak for themselves.”
The talking head is replaced by a graphic of a graph showing the plummeting price of Craven Industries shares. My father gasps. “That can’t be right.”
I hit the remote, changing to another news channel. “We’ve been outside Craven Industries since the announcement by the board this morning, and the mood outside the main office is intense.” The camera pans to show the crowd of reporters tossing questions at one of the suits who is surrounded by security.
“What in the holy hell is going on down there?”
“They tossed Brent off the board. Craven Industries is no longer headed by a Craven.”
“Like hell.” My father starts to pull himself up, and I help him to stand. “I’m going down there to set this shit right.”
“I don’t think that’s a good idea,” I say as I help him over to the closet. “You can barely walk.”
“Don’t tell me what to do,” he mutters, struggling to pull open the closet door. “Where the fuck is your brother? Get him here right now.”
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