“Alright, maybe we’ll hold on to these then.”
I stashed the shrooms in my molle pack and finished my search, but didn’t find anything else on the bugbear. I had no use for a giant seven foot club, or the rusted wrist spike, so we left the body where it lay and continued through the cavern after I found my M17.
The memory of my fearless son helping me take down the monster filled me with pride, but it also showed me just how capable a fighter he was. I had thought that he might grow into a powerful warrior one day, but it seemed that day had already come. I couldn’t imagine what he would be capable of when he grew to adulthood.
We followed the river into an alcove hidden by hanging moss, and I turned on my flashlight as we descended the slippery slope. The water spilled out into another small cavern littered with glowing crystals, and we took a moment to catch our breath. Giant frogs croaked in the small chamber, but they weren’t mean, and they hopped away and dug into the mud as we approached.
The chamber was long and narrow and led to another tunnel with a natural shelf to the right of the river. My flashlight revealed nothing menacing in that dark hollow, but I was worried after the encounter with the bugbear, so I led Sawsaw onward instead of letting him take point position.
“Stay away from the water,” I told him as we walked. It widened and became deeper in the tunnel, and I had no idea what might be lurking in the fast-moving stream.
After about fifteen minutes we came to a fork where the river split in three different directions. To the left it snuck beneath a low shelf, straight ahead it continued down the main tunnel, and to the right it veered around a narrow corner. The map said to take a right, so I slowly tiptoed around the corner and pointed my flashlight down the new tunnel.
Voices echoed from deeper down the tunnel, and I clicked off my flashlight and halted Sawsaw.
I waited and listened, but the voices didn’t sound again for many long minutes.
“There’s something up ahead,” I told Sawsaw. “Stay behind me and keep in camo mode.”
“Sawsaw,” he said with a salute.
I put my hand over the end of the flashlight and clicked it on. A single beam of light led the way, and we slowly crept forward. The underground river narrowed as we went and soon spilled over a waterfall. The map indicated that this was where the abandoned gold mine began, and I saw a dark quarry of hewn walls littered with broken stones, old mining gear, and a few abandoned carts.
The crashing of the water twenty feet below masked any other sounds that we might've heard, but I didn’t need my ears to see the dancing torchlight coming from an alcove to the far right. I could faintly see the metal rail leading off to the left, and we could have just taken that route instead, but I didn’t want to leave anyone or anything behind us without knowing what direction they were headed.
I gestured to Sawsaw so that he understood my intentions, turned off my flashlight, and then slid along the shelf to the right. There were steps cut into the stone, most likely by the dwarves who had once worked these mines, so I took them slowly and listened for any movement.
When we reached the bottom and got a few feet away from the waterfall, the voices returned. Whatever they were, they were yipping and hollering like they were having a grand old time, and I prayed that we would find a group of happy little hobbits enjoying a second breakfast.
But I wouldn’t have put any money on it. After all, this was the underdark.
I considered again just moving on, but the nagging feeling that I would regret it wouldn’t go away. We had to at least peek and see what was making that noise, so we rushed across the old rail and pressed our backs up against the shorn wall.
“Ohhh, ahhh, this is going to be good,” one of the voices said.
“Get that lid on the pot!” yelled another.
And that’s when I heard the most beautiful female singing voice I had ever heard.
“Shut her up!” one of the voices screamed, and the wonderful song died abruptly.
“Fuck!” I hissed.
Any thoughts about just taking a look and moving on fled from my mind when I heard the singing woman. Her voice had done something to me, and though I couldn’t quite place the feeling, I somehow felt a little more alive.
Sawsaw bounced on his toes behind me with his hatchet in hand and brown eyes gleaming.
“Fuck!” he repeated when I glanced at him.
“Be cool, little dude,” I warned, and he calmed down a bit. “You stay here and watch my back, alright?”
“Sawsaw,” he whispered with shifty eyes.
I slid around the corner, but there were big boulders which obscured my vision, and I could only see the glow of torchlight around them. It counted at least six voices, and they sounded just like the goblins that I had encountered the last time I ventured into the underdark. That made sense, since the rail led to their city, but Nika had said that this was a secret passage.
“Get her in the damned pot!” someone shouted.
“She’s as slippery as a fish!” another complained.
“Don’t let her pull that gag out of her mouth again,” yet another goblin added. “She starts singing again, and we’re doomed.”
The mention of the pot made my stomach turn. Were they trying to boil someone alive? I listened closer and heard the telltale crackle of a fire. There was a little smoke hovering near the cavern ceiling forty feet above, but it didn’t smell like woodsmoke. Whatever they were burning stunk to high heaven.
I eased around the lichen covered wall slowly. My only advantage was the element of surprise, and I didn’t want to give myself away until I had a plan.
“She bit me!” One of the goblins hissed, and then he let out a stream of curses.
Then the song began again.
It echoed through the caverns for one fleeting moment before becoming muffled and dying out altogether. My heart raced, my vision swam, and the hairs on my body stood on end. There was some sort of magic in that voice, and I knew that I needed to help whoever it belonged to.
I moved quickly around the boulder that blocked my view and crouched down when the scene unfolded before me.
There were not six, but ten goblins dancing around a big cauldron. The water wasn’t bubbling yet, but the fire beneath it was growing. Four of them fought with the big lid, and inside, a beautiful blond haired woman struggled to get out.
Chapter 14
I slowly crept back around the boulder and found Sawsaw waiting for me. He looked concerned for the woman, and he eagerly awaited my instructions.
“Alright, Sawsaw. There’s a woman in there who needs our help. We’re up against ten goblins--”
“Sawsaw?” he said and pointed at himself.
“No, they’re not like you or your mother. These are evil goblins that want to hurt a nice lady.”
“Sawsaw…” he growled with a mean scowl.
“I was thinking the same thing,” I told him. “I want you to go in there in invisibility mode and cause a distraction. Don’t let them see you and don’t get too close. The ones with crappy clothes are the dumbest, and they will be the easiest to play tricks on, alright?”
He nodded eagerly.
“Ok, buddy, let ‘em have it.”
“Sawsaw, shroom,” he said and pointed at my molle pack.
“Good idea.” I retrieved the bugbear’s sack and handed Sawsaw a mushroom.
He wolfed it down, and his skin color immediately changed to match the walls. I couldn’t even see the shimmer of refracted light, so I moved back to my perch and watched as the goblins continued to fight to get the heavy lid on. The blonde-haired woman thrashed and bucked as the goblins rode the lid. She looked strong as hell, and I silently cheered on her efforts.
A moment later one of the goblin’s in shoddy rags cried out and grabbed his ass.
“Hey!” he yelled at the goblin behind him. “You just stick me with your dagger?”
“What?” the accused asked. But then he let out a yip, turned, and pushed the go
blin behind him. “What was that for?”
I could just imagine Sawsaw bobbing and weaving through the pack of goblins and stabbing them in their asses. Soon a squabble broke out as the angry goblins argued over who had poked who.
It was time to make my move, so I charged into the room and buried my axe in the closest goblin’s head before he even knew that I was there.
The next goblin turned just in time to have his throat slashed by my knife. As the bodies hit the floor, I bum-rushed the group, batted aside a spear, and planted a heavy boot in the wielder's chest. The screaming goblin flew into the big pot and caused it to gong loudly. The woman tried to shout something through her gag, but I was too busy fighting the short green men to pay her any attention.
I strafed around a slow spear thrust, severed another goblin’s head, and then eviscerated the next as Sawsaw’s form shifted into view. My son was a little shorter than the adult goblins, but he managed to jump on one of their shoulders, ride him to the ground, and stab him in the eyes repeatedly.
There were only four left, but they didn’t quite know if they should attack me or Sawsaw, and their indecision allowed both of us to tear into them. I cleaved into the skull of one of them with my axe and then kicked another in the face while Sawsaw rolled on the ground between the third and fourth. His dagger and axe whipped out as he tumbled past, and each of the two goblins screamed as their hamstrings were cut.
I spun to the two green monsters staggering toward my son and then smashed my axe into the closet. My attack bore all the strength of a papa bear, and one of the goblin’s head tore clean off like a T-ball and smacked into the face of the fourth. The impact bowled him over, and I then crushed his throat under my boot like I’d stomp on a bug.
There was only one goblin left now, the one I had kicked a half moment ago, but as I spun to face the little asshole, I saw him turn tail to run. He only made it three steps, however, before Sawsaw landed on his back like some sort of green Spiderman, and my amazing and crazy son ripped his axe across the goblin’s throat to kill him.
Then it was over. Or at least, I thought it was, but when I took a step toward the woman in the giant cooking pot, I thought I heard something, and I turned back to Sawsaw and pressed my finger to my lips.
My son was covered head to toe in blood, and his eyes were a bit wild, but he understood my command, held his breath, and listened. The cave we were in led to a tunnel, and from that tunnel I now heard more voices.
“Awww shit,” Sawsaw groaned, and I would have laughed if the situation wasn’t so dangerous.
I glanced over at the pot, but I didn’t see the woman anymore, and my heart leapt into my throat when I realized that she must have become exhausted from pushing the heavy lid up.
If I didn’t get her out of there now, she would probably drown, but the sound of the approaching footsteps were growing louder.
And there were a lot of them.
“Sawsaw, go help the woman,” I said as I moved to the side of the entrance where the footsteps were coming from.
He scampered past me, but my eyes were focused on the tunnel where the footsteps were coming from, and I raised my axe to take off the head of any asshole that walked out.
A heartbeat later, the first goblin from the new group entered into the room and walked right into the business end of my dwarven battle axe. My strike tore the top half of his head clean off, and the goblins behind him gave a startled cry.
I ducked low and sunk my axe into the knee of the next goblin to cross the threshold. He was only about three feet tall, and I grabbed him as he fell forward, spun him around, and charged into the tunnel. Three spears thudded into my screaming captive, and then I slashed the throat of the closest goblin with my axe, chopped halfway through another's neck, and split the breastbone of a third. The tunnel was lined with glowing crystals, and in the soft light I could see that there were at least twenty goblins waiting for me.
Whoops.
Spears thudded into the body of the dead goblin that I carried as I surged into the group. One of the goblins slammed into me and dislodged my small corpse shield, so I dropped the body and split my attacker’s head like a pumpkin. A spear whizzed through the air toward me, but I ducked just in time, grabbed ahold of my latest victim’s ankle, swung him like a club, and sent two of the charging attackers into the wall.
I released the goblin’s ankle, pulled my survival knife from its sheath, and dove into the horde like a wild man. My growls matched theirs as I hacked, slashed, and spun through the horde like an angry blender. Limbs spiraled through the air, throats gurgled their final curses, and bloody bodies fell in my wake.
I took a glancing club hit to the shoulder and retaliated by driving the little bastard’s nuts into his stomach with my boot toe. Then I buried my axe into the next goblin’s head, pulled out my M17, and fired point blank into another’s ugly face. The goblin’s head exploded, and the bullet continued on and took out the one behind him as well.
I heard a familiar war cry from behind, and Sawsaw suddenly leapt over me and slashed the necks of two goblins coming at me from the sides. He landed, rolled, and then disappeared into the chaos as if he was made of smoke.
Then I heard the beautiful singing voice.
Suddenly, I felt like I weighed half as much, my vision focused, and it seemed that each breath was giving me twice as much oxygen. The sensation was amazing, but the surrounding goblins all let out a collective moan, and it looked like their shoulders actually seemed to bow as if they were carrying a heavy weight.
I used the distraction to take out another three goblins with my axe while Sawsaw ran around the room in invisible mode, hamstringing the goblins and leaving them prone and screaming. I hadn’t really explained this plan to him, but it was obvious that he was setting them up so that I could knock them down, and a half minute later we both stood in the middle of a bloody heap.
“You okay?” I asked, since he was covered in almost as much blood as I was.
“Sawsaw,” he said proudly, and then he pointed at me. “Dadda?”
“I’m good,” I said, then I pointed back toward the cavern where the woman was singing. “Great job letting her out.”
“Dadda!” he said as he pointed back into the room. I followed close behind and saw the woman leaning out of the still cooking pot. She stopped singing as soon as she saw us and waved frantically.
“I can’t get myself out--”
“I’ll get you,” I said as I reached the edge of the pot and moved to grab her under her armpits. As soon as I touched her, I realized that she was actually naked, but once I tugged her free of the water, I had a bigger surprise when I saw that she wasn’t human at all.
She was a mermaid, and the long fishtail she had instead of legs was covered by a mixture of sheer green and purple scales.
“Holy shit!” I gasped when I noticed that she also had smaller fins on her triceps and forearms. The woman had larger fins on her shoulders as well, and twin lines of scales ascended up her otherwise human looking torso to cover the nipples of her breasts. Her greenish-purple tail and fins reminded me somewhat of a betta fish, and the scales shimmered when the firelight bounced off them.
“Ahhh!” she gasped as soon as I moved to set her down on the ground beside the fire, but when I released my hands from her shoulders and tail, she just wrapped her arms around my neck. “That feels much better. It was too hot in that water!”
“Yeah,” I said as I glanced back to the pot. “Seems like they were going to cook you.”
“Stupid goblins,” the woman said with a musical laugh that made me lightheaded, “but stupid me for getting caught in their net. Thank you for saving me. What is your name, handsome?”
“I’m Ken,” I said as I felt her hands gently squeeze the back of my neck, “and this is Sawsaw.”
“Is he a goblin?” she asked as she pulled me down against her breasts.
“No,” I said, “Well, kind of. He’s my son. Half-human and half-gob
lin.”
“I’ve never heard of such a thing,” she gasped as she looked over at the blood soaked kid.
“Sawsaw,” he said with a smile, and then he tapped his chest with his finger.
“Oh,” she sighed. “He seems nice, and he did take the lid off my pot.”
“What’s your name?” I asked the mysterious woman.
“Calliope,” she said shyly. “But you can call me Calli if you want.”
“That’s a beautiful name,” I said.
“Beautiful…” Sawsaw droned as he squatted down and petted her radiant tail.
“How did you get here?” I asked. “Aren’t you a mermaid?”
“I am a siren,” she explained as she fluttered her long blonde eyelashes at me. “I got lost in the rivers and then caught in their net. Can you help me find my way out of here? I don’t really know where I am.”
“Where are you trying to go? Do you live in an underground lake or something?” I asked as I thought about the one that we had journeyed through earlier.
“I came from such a lake, deep, deep below these tunnels. But I don’t want to go back there. I would like to go with you if I can.”
“Why don’t you want to go back home?” I asked.
“I don’t have a home anymore,” she said, and her beautiful lips twisted down into a frown. “My tribe was conquered by another, and we were all murdered or enslaved. I was fleeing when I got lost. I have nowhere else to go, but you both seem nice. Or at least, you haven’t tried to eat me yet.”
“We aren’t going to eat you,” I promised as I finally gave up trying to free my neck from her embrace and just sat next to her, “but we’re headed somewhere dangerous.”
“Treasure!” Sawsaw said and offered me a look that suggested I was nuts.
“What is he saying about treasure?” Calli asked.
“We’re on our way to the goblin city to, uh, steal the king’s treasure,” I confessed.
“Oh, now that sounds like fun. I would love to help you. Can I come? Please?”
Nika’s words came to mind, and I wondered if I had just found my second wife.
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