Jolie watched him run his hands through his short black hair. It was something her father always did.
“I always hoped that you were happy. I wondered if you survived Goethe’s household.”
He looked confused. “I was told that you died, Jolie. Goethe’s mate told me a rogue guardian killed you one night. I’d been trying to see you for days. It broke my heart that I never got to say goodbye.”
Flynn could feel all the muscles in her body tense.
“I didn't die. They lied to you.”
Alexzandre didn't get it. “I’m confused. I was told you were ash. Then Goethe sent me to the new family. I was traded away to be trained. I think he bartered me for some house servants.”
Yeah, likely females ones.
Jolie wanted to be sick.
“I tried to reach for you, but I couldn’t feel you, or speak to you anymore. I never reached again. It was too hard to know that I lost our parents, and then you.”
“It was best that you left, Alexzandre.”
More confusion crossed his face. “I hear from your mate that the Harcourte society is powerful. I’m not surprised. You always were strong willed and tough.”
She nearly bolted from the room.
“Yes, we’re doing quite well. I owe it to my mate. Jacques is very good with money and investments.”
“I’m so glad that our time with Goethe didn't ruin your life. He was a miserable SOB. I used to hear stories.”
She couldn’t handle it anymore.
“Flynn, please,” she whispered, needing more body to body contact. She felt incredibly cold.
Even Jacques moved closer to rest his hand on her shoulder.
“What’s going on?” asked Alexzandre, alarmed. “What happened? Whenever I bring up Goethe, she looks horrified.”
“I need to tell you about Jolie’s time with him, and it won’t be pleasant,” warned Jacques. He reached out and stroked Jolie’s leg as Flynn wrapped her in his arms even more securely.
“What happened?” he asked, staring at his sister.
Jacques began his tale of torture and rape. “After you both arrived at Goethe’s home, Jolie was forced to become Goethe’s consort of sorts.”
“Forced?”
“He took a liking to your sister and used her as his play thing. Goethe the Grim--have you heard the tales used to scare the young vampyres? Well, they weren’t all made up stories.”
Alexzandre began to pale. “He used her how?” The tea cup rattled in his hand.
Flynn turned her face toward his and did the only thing he knew that would work. Gently, he offered tenderness where cold cruelty once lived.
“He locked her up and raped her repeatedly for one hundred and fifty years.”
Once it was said, Jacques wanted to be sick. Just a few days ago, he’d been in the other man’s position.
This sucked for everyone.
“No.”
Jolie’s mates heard the pain in his voice. When he leaned back against the cushions of the couch, Alex closed his eyes.
“I don’t know ...”
Jolie clung to Flynn. At that moment, he was the only thing holding her afloat.
When Alex opened his eyes, the tears were present. “Jolie,” he began, unsure what to say. “I’m so sorry that I left you there to deal with all of that alone. I didn’t know--I swear to you--I didn’t know.”
The tears overwhelmed him. Soon, they streaked down his face.
Jolie hated to see him hurt. This was her flesh and blood. They shared a mother and father. Here was her long lost link to her past.
Moving from Flynn’s arms, she knelt beside him. “Don’t cry, Alex. Too many tears have already been shed over this. It doesn’t matter anymore, it’s over. Today is a new day for us.”
He backed away from her touch. “I can’t.”
Jolie looked like she’d been physically slapped.
“I left you there to suffer and be abused. I swore that I’d protect you, and I didn’t save you,” he said, the anger building. “I failed you, Jolie, and I’ve failed our parents!”
“Alex, please! I don’t need this! I have to live with it every day.”
He moved out of her reach.
Flynn pulled her into his frame to help her work through the hurt. The tears were there, and so was the pain.
“I need to leave. I have some things to think about. I love you, Jolie, and always will, but maybe finding me was a mistake,” he said softly.
Where the men expected an eruption from Jolie, there was none.
“I understand, Alexzandre. Believe me, I understand,” she whispered. “If you’ll excuse me,” she said, pulling free from her mate’s embrace. “Goodbye, Alex. Take care of yourself.”
With that, she left the room.
Both men turned to face the vampyre before them.
“Really?” blurted Flynn. “Hasn’t she suffered enough?”
Jacques remained a little calmer. He had to. After all, this was all his fault, and now he was in clean up mode. “You should go,” he stated.
Alex moved toward the doorway. “Please take care of her. I can see that she’s happy and safe here. Love her for me,” he stated before walking out.
Then the door slammed.
“Well, hell. So much for good intentions. That just bit us in the ass.”
Jacques leaned against the wall. “It all sounded so good in my head. I’ve screwed up.”
Flynn corrected him. “We’re in this together.”
Yeah, they were.
“We should have seen this one coming, Flynn.”
After all, Death had warned them. Anything related to Goethe was going to go to hell in a hand basket.
Here was the proof.
Flynn touched his shoulder, “Come on. Let’s go put the pieces back together again.”
If that was even possible.
CHAPTER twenty
Heading down the hall toward her room, Jolie instead changed her mind and stopped in front of Mathew’s door. Her heart was heavy, and yet, she was compelled to check on him to make sure he was doing well. Maybe she just wanted company from someone else who knew what the hurt felt like deep inside.
“Enter,” a mumbled voice answered, raw with agony and distraction.
Mathew was in the corner. It appeared that he was working on a painting. He looked tormented.
“Are you okay?” she asked.
He looked up and was surprised to see her.
“What are you working on, Mathew?”
“You,” he said softly, unable to make eye contact.
“Me?” she asked, almost forgetting her own pain as she moved toward him. “Are you painting me?”
“Yes, Jacques commissioned it for your room.”
Jolie noticed that the cold in her body begin to recede a little. “May I peek?” she asked.
“Well…” He looked into her face, and instinctually knew that his mistress wasn’t well. “If you don’t mind seeing it unfinished, I guess that’s fine.”
Jolie checked out his work. It was spectacular, even unfinished. Their tortured underling was indeed an artist. “It’s lovely, Mathew!”
“I’m having a difficult time with the correct facial expression,” he admitted.
Then he had an idea.
“Would you sit for me, so I can paint you?” he asked hopefully.
Jolie brightened immediately. At least her family loved and wanted her, despite her shameful past. “I think I’d like that. Where do you want me?”
Mathew pointed at the bed. “I’m sorry, Mistress, but I put you in a sexual position because it was for your mates. I hope you don’t get offended.”
She laughed, heading to the bed. “Position me. You’ll find I don’t offend easily.”
He dropped his art supplies and moved toward her side. There, he placed Jolie where he wanted her. She was lounging on the bed, head back, staring at where he’d been sitting.
“Um…can you drop the part of
your shirt on your shoulder off to the side?”
She did what he asked.
Mathew felt his skin flush. His mistress was in his bed, posing. If the masters came in, he was dead.
Yet, he couldn’t help himself.
“How’s this?”
“Perfect, Mistress.”
He went back to the easel.
Jolie remained completely still as she watched Mathew’s hands move across the canvass. It was as if he was possessed with some need to work fast.
“Why this picture?” she asked.
He shrugged. How did he tell her that he’d envisioned her like that so many times?
“I guess I thought that the masters would like to see you immortalized like this.”
Yeah, and so would he.
“Take your time, Mathew. I have all night.”
He wished he could say the same. Mathew knew his alone time with her was limited. Soon, her mates would take her away.
And then, he’d be empty again.
* * * H a r c o u r t e * * *
They knew where she was, yet they didn't go and retrieve her. Jolie was comfortably lounging in Mathew’s room, and they had to accept that.
While they wished that she would have sought them out, this was something they had no control over.
Flynn was taking it the hardest.
“You’re making me insane by pacing.”
“I can’t help it. Our woman is with another vampyre. Why aren’t you getting bitchy?”
He shrugged. “I trust her. Vampyres mate for life. I know that she’ll come to us when she needs us.”
“He wants her.”
“Yes, he does, but then again, so do many other men who see her. If we get jealous over this, we’ll spend the rest of our lives getting frustrated. I trust her.”
He turned. “Oh, I trust her. I don’t trust him. There’s a big difference.”
Jacques laughed. “He’s harmless. I think you’re getting a little too freaked out over this,” he stated.
Flynn stared at him. “You’re a lying sack of vampyre shit! This is bothering you too.”
Jacques lifted an eyebrow. “Is it?”
Flynn moved closer. “You’re lying. While your face is blank, your eyes aren’t.”
It was like a switch was flipped.
He didn't expect what happened next.
Jacques was up and raging around the room.
“You’re right! I feel helpless to save her from the hurt, and now she’s gone to another man to heal. That emasculates me. It makes me incredibly angry, and I want to hurt him, okay? Are you happy? There’s the ugly truth!”
Flynn watched him pace.
The outburst was very… Flynn-like. It made him want to laugh.
“I understand how you feel, Jacques.”
“I get that Mathew is a brooding wounded soul, but why can’t he pick a different mother duck to follow around.”
Flynn agreed.
Jacques began cursing in French. The tirade went on for a few seconds. “I see him watching her. I can tell what he’s thinking and trust me--it’s not pure.”
Flynn approached. “I’m sorry I provoked you into talking about this.”
He sighed. “I don’t want to lose her. That’s all. I fear I won’t hold enough of her heart to stay in her life.”
He looked confused. “What?”
“You’re her true mate. She’ll never stray from you. We both know that she’s yours more than mine.”
“Hey! Knock it off,” Flynn demanded. “That’s bullshit. She may have been meant to be my mate, but you’ve had her for centuries. I’ll never catch up with that. She picked you, Jacques, with her own free will. That’s more important. I can’t compete with you.”
They stared at each other.
“This has us screwed up.”
Jacques closed his eyes. “Yes, it does. What do we do?”
Flynn knew he needed to come up with something, and fast. I say we find her and make her talk about it. If she won’t, we follow her around until she does.”
“That’ll piss her off.”
“I know how to deal with an angry Jolie. A broken one scares me.”
“Good point.”
* * * H a r c o u r t e * * *
Jolie was angry.
Not with her mates for inviting this pain back into her life, but because she’d actually believed that her brother wouldn’t see the tarnish on her life.
Yeah, she was wrong.
She loved her mates and cherished the spirit of their gift. It wasn’t their fault that this was jacked up from the start.
Jolie knew they were waiting for her in their quarters. Maybe that’s why she spent so much time with Mathew. She was hiding.
They say time healed, and now she only wanted time alone to find peace.
Once she entered the room, Jolie knew that wasn’t happening.
Not now.
Not ever.
They were all over her the minute she stepped through the door.
“We missed you,” stated Flynn.
“Thank you for allowing me some time with Mathew,” she said softly. “I needed to make sure he was feeling better after the ordeal at Belladonna’s hands.”
“Jolie,” began Flynn, feeling her pain slowly seep back into her. It killed him that he was helpless to fix this.
“No, Flynn. I’d rather not if it’s okay with you. I’ve had a long day, and I wish to grab a book and relax with a glass of wine,” she said, walking away from them to find quiet in their closet. If she continued being near them, the tears would come again.
Flynn’s heart flipped in his chest. Rarely did she turn away from him like this, and his own insecurities rose up, scaring him. “Then I guess I’m going to sleep, so I can be up early to watch the house.”
He wished Jolie would have touched him.
Given him a look.
Something.
“I’ll watch over her until dawn.” He patted Flynn on the shoulder. “Don’t worry. We’ll fix this when she’s ready.” Jacques knew it was time to face her down.
“We need to talk,” he said, blocking her exit from the closet as he slipped into a robe.
Jolie wanted to throw herself against him and weep.
She wanted Flynn to hold her hand, reassuring her that everything would be fine.
Yet, she couldn’t.
Jolie had let this weaken her enough. It was time to be strong and hold up under the disappointment.
“Very well, but I’d rather do this elsewhere.”
She could feel Flynn’s hurt, and it broke her heart. She’d given him the cold shoulder, and he didn't deserve it.
“As you wish.”
Jacques followed her to the empty family room. Before approaching her, he grabbed a bottle of red wine and poured two glasses.
Then he sat.
Jolie grabbed a random book and tried to get lost in it.
So, Jacques did the same.
A few minutes went by before Jolie glanced up at her mate. “What are you doing, Jacques?”
“Reading, why?”
“You’re reading about the native flora and fauna of French countryside?” she asked accusingly, pointing at the book in his hand.
“Yes, I am,” he replied, knowing that he was just using that book as a ruse to remain nearby. He was doing what Flynn had suggested.
One of them had to stick close.
“Yeah, that’s normal,” she muttered.
He lifted a brow. “You’re accusing me of bad taste in literature? You’re reading ‘Alice Through the Looking Glass’, and it’s in German. You don’t speak German, Jolie.”
She opened her mouth.
Nothing came out.
Instead, her bottom lip quivered.
“He couldn’t stand being near me, Jacques, so he abandoned me again.”
The tears came.
Deep down, Jolie knew that she’d never see her brother again. The look on his face said it all. Tha
t moment was a permanent goodbye.
Jacques knew what he needed to do. Moving to her side, he took Jolie’s hand in his. “I’m so sorry, Jolie. I really believed that this gift would bring joy to your life. Had I known…”
“I’m glad that he’s not dead, Jacques, but I don’t think I want to see him again. It hurts too much.”
“You don’t have to, my love. Flynn and I won’t let him near you. I promise.”
“Oh, poor Flynn. I hurt him.”
Jacques didn't say anything. He wouldn’t lie to her.
“Well, that spoke volumes, Jacques.”
“Our Flynn will be okay. He’s tough. You can mourn now, and later we’ll work the rest out. But...”
Jolie waited.
“When you’re upset, come to us. We’re your mates. Mathew isn’t.”
That, too, said it all.
She stared at him. “You think I went to Mathew because I didn't want to be near you?”
He simply stared at her.
“Oh, Jacques, that’s furthest from the truth. I didn't want to weep over this. If I went to you and Flynn, the tears would come. I wanted to be strong. I can’t be around either of you.”
“Why?” he asked, stroking her cheek.
“You see though me. You know my heart.”
His quivered at her honesty.
“I love you,” she whispered, pulling his mouth down to hers. Now, she was ready to heal. He could offer her peace.
Jolie slid her hands into the opening of his robe. She loved the way his body reacted to her touch. From the quickening of his breath, to the pounding of his pulse, it was all for her.
Jolie needed this.
She needed her rock in life.
And here he was.
“I want you to touch me, Jacques,” she whispered into his ear, earning a low growl.
Jacques would give her the world if he could. His love for her was immeasurable.
“Mmmmm… you smell delicious,” he murmured into her ear, right before he bit down on her lobe. When Jolie jerked against him, he thought he’d break apart from the need. It felt like ages since he’d touched her last.
“I’ll love you forever,” she promised, as he pulled her robe open.
Dangerous Misery (The Harcourte Vampyre Society Book 3) Page 34