Snow sat on his bed beside his brother, discussing business matters and new ideas Antoine wanted to try out in the next season at Vampirerotique. Snow tipped his head back and glanced up at the ceiling. His beautiful blue eyes remained locked on it for a few seconds before he dropped his chin and continued talking to Antoine.
He had done that often over the past forty-eight hours.
Was he thinking about her?
Did he want her to come back?
She pretended that thought didn’t please her and she didn’t desire to do as he silently bid because she ached to return to him too.
She longed to touch him again.
Ever since he had bitten her, new feelings had bombarded her, as though the act had unleashed a dormant ability to experience emotions that as far as she knew were ones beyond an angel’s grasp.
Such as desire.
Whenever she gazed into Snow’s eyes or caressed his hair or skin, her belly heated and quivered, and her body shook, her temperature rose, her palms sweated and she blushed.
She also had a wicked urge to strip him bare and run her hands over him.
No good would come of succumbing to those desires.
If her master discovered that she harboured such feelings for Snow, he would believe her compromised and would judge Snow in her stead. He would kill him without a fair trial or hesitation.
Her master entered her small white room and she severed her connection to Snow, bringing her vision back to her realm. He stood in the doorway, his pure wings tucked against the back of his casual white robes. He had tied his black hair into a ponytail and his amethyst eyes had an edge that she didn’t like.
“It has been many hours since you were last in the mortal realm. Have you already made your decision?” He remained standing ramrod straight, as she expected of him. He had always been stiff and formal, and many angels wondered why he had taken her under his wing. Even as a child, she had been considered a hellion and beyond salvation.
Just like Snow.
“No,” she said and turned to face him with resolve in her heart. “I am watching him from here. He interacts daily with the other residents of the theatre, especially the twin babies and the young boy, all without incident or danger. When I have seen enough to make an informed decision, I will give you my judgement.”
His expression remained emotionless but the edge to his purple eyes sharpened. “Do you believe you will be able to make that decision before the deadline?”
“Deadline?” Her heart skipped a beat. He had never mentioned a deadline.
“You have only three days left out of the seven I gave to you.”
Aurora wanted to spit out a vile curse directed at him but held her tongue. He would punish her if she let her anger show and he would no doubt choose to have her held in her room, under watch at all times, until she had thought on her sin and apologised. Even then, he probably wouldn’t release her from custody until it was too late and her time with Snow was up.
Three days.
Heat prickled over her arms and down her back, an uncomfortable sensation that she had felt often since she had started visiting Snow when he had been lost to his bloodlust. Panic.
How could her master expect her to judge Snow in only three days? She had watched him for two, and that gave her a good start, but there was still so much she needed to see.
She needed to see if he could be trusted outside the reach of his brother, in the open world. She needed to see if he would relapse once her blood had left his system. She wouldn’t be able to live with herself if she made a wrong judgement and he went on to lose himself to his demons again and harmed mortals.
She wouldn’t need to live with herself.
Her master would make her see what she had done and then she would pay the ultimate price for her mistake.
She would lose her soul and be cast into darkness, into Hell.
“Three days,” her master said in a cold voice that sent a shiver down her spine. He turned to leave. “Aurora.”
She gasped and her eyes widened. He knew. He knew and was angry with her, and that was why she had such a short period of time in which to judge Snow. He had lied to her, pretending he had given her seven days from the time when he had handed her the mission. He closed the door behind him and she did curse him now, muttering the words under her breath.
She had to return to Snow.
Aurora closed her eyes and when she opened them again, she stood in Snow’s room, shrouded in shadows. Antoine was gone. Snow lay on his bed, reading a book, still wearing far too much clothing even though only a black shirt and jeans encased his powerful body.
Aurora checked herself.
Angels were naturally curious but she was woman enough to admit that it wasn’t curiosity driving her.
It was desire.
She couldn’t succumb to it though. Her master already believed her compromised because she had a name now, given to her by the vampire she was supposed to judge. It didn’t exactly make her appear impartial. Neither did her lying with him while he slept, ensuring he had good dreams. She was influencing him.
“I know you are there, Aurora.”
She shivered at the way her name sounded in his deep baritone. Delicious. Erotic.
His blue gaze lifted from the pages of his book to settle on her where she stood in the middle of his room, between the foot of his double bed and his bathroom.
He must have trained his senses to detect her even when she was invisible to his eyes.
“You left without a word again. Why?” There was a note of anger in his tone, a sharp edge that reminded her of her master and demanded that she answer him.
Aurora lifted her shroud and revealed herself to him. His eyes immediately raked over her, burning her through the layers of her white dress, making her achy and hot.
“You were sleeping and I had to return.” She tried to sound casual, not wanting him to know how shaken she was by what her master had announced. Three days. She didn’t want to think about it. In three days, she may have saved this beautiful man that was such an intrinsic part of her life or condemned him to death.
“You were gone for a long time. I was beginning to think you would never return.” He placed his book down on his ebony nightstand and sat up on the bed, arranging himself against the pillows. His gaze bore into her, darker now, and not with desire. Displeasure. He radiated it together with hurt.
What did he want her to say? That she had fought herself countless times in order to stop herself from giving in to her deepest desire and coming to him?
That she had ached to be with him every second she had watched him, wanting to be the object of his focus and on the receiving end of his smiles?
That she had dreamed of lying with him, and not in an innocent way?
She couldn’t admit to those things, not even to ease his pain and reassure him that she desired his company as much as he craved hers.
It was killing her.
She stood in the middle of his morbid apartment, staring at him, battling her desire to admit why she had come to him again after thousands of years in the shadows and why she was here now. She couldn’t, and she hated herself for it.
She hated to lie to him and pretend that everything was normal when her whole world was tilting on its axis and starting to crumble.
As if he knew her thoughts, he cocked his head to one side, and said, “Why did you come back now, when it has been two thousand years since the night you saved me? Why didn’t you return to me when I forgot you and make me remember you again?”
Two very good questions, one she would have to skirt around because she couldn’t tell him the whole reason she was here now and the other she could answer truthfully.
She moved forwards across the wooden floor, wrapped her hands around the thick steel post at the bottom left corner of his bed, and lowered her gaze to the black sheets.
“I wanted to see you again. I was drawn by your suffering… and I have always been wi
th you when you have been in this world, even when you could not see me. I was not supposed to allow anyone in this world to see me, not even you, not even to remind you that I was there in the shadows, watching your life play out.”
She lifted her eyes to settle on him but he looked away, casting his down to his knees. A frown hardened his expression and she could see his self-reproach and guilt as it flickered in his pale eyes and the grim line of his mouth.
“I am sorry that I forgot you, Aurora,” he whispered, soft and tender, voice thick with emotion. “I shouldn’t have. It was wrong of me… and you suffered because of it.”
Aurora pushed away from the bedpost, his gruff but sweet apology melting her and making her desire to go to him. She wanted to be near to him, but she feared what would happen if she closed the short distance between them. It was already hard enough to resist her need to touch him again.
If she drew any closer to him, it would become impossible.
“It is done now.” She trailed her fingers down the cold dark metal, searching her mind for something else to say to get him off a topic that evidently plagued him. She couldn’t think of anything. “It is daylight. You should be resting.”
Had she just talked about the weather with him?
It was something she had witnessed mortals do whenever they were lost for a topic of conversation. She had never thought she would rely on it herself.
Snow sighed. “I do not want to sleep.”
“Why not?” She could spot the signs of fatigue in his eyes and the tight lines of his face.
Snow’s beautiful blue eyes locked on her and he frowned, his silvery eyebrows drawing tight above them. “Because you will disappear again if I go to sleep, and… I… enjoy your company.”
Aurora smiled at that, heart lifting and warming at the same time. Snow liked her being around. The feeling went both ways.
“I do not want to wake to find you gone again, not knowing when you will come back to me.” His words were gruff, hard, but she felt the softness and sentiment behind them, and they touched her.
“I promise I will remain here while you sleep then.” Because she honestly couldn’t bring herself to leave him. If she only had three days, then she wanted to spend each minute of them with him, and not only so she could judge him properly. The hatred she had held in her heart had all melted away, thawed by his smiles and the touch of affection that shone in his eyes whenever he spoke to her, together with the heat of his desire. Desire she felt beating within her too, impossible to ignore or deny.
“And what will you be doing while I sleep?” He looked suspicious and a corona of red ringed his ice-blue irises. What scenarios was he running through his mind? She didn’t intend to harm him or leave the room, if that was the root of his concern.
“I will stay here and rest too.” Part lie, because she didn’t intend to sleep at all. She had to think of a plan.
“Then you must sleep with me then.” He looked beautifully startled when her eyes widened and then flustered. His cheeks darkened to a pale shade of pink. “I meant only that we should share the bed.”
“Why?” If she shared the bed with him, she was likely to find herself tempted to carry out any one of the thousand wicked scenarios that had crossed her mind in the split second after he had talked about sleeping with him.
Sleeping with him.
Mercy, she desired that above everything, even when she knew it was sinful and wrong of her.
“Because I want to be sure that you don’t disappear.” He was back to gruff again, and folded his arms over his chest, the action causing the sleeves of his black shirt to pull tight across his muscles and making her feel that he wasn’t going to allow any negotiation in this matter.
She was aware that if she lay close to him, he would sense it if she tried to leave, and it would wake him. He was taking no chances. He truly wanted her to stay with him and not go home again. She was willing to do as he asked, but she wouldn’t be sleeping. She had to devise her plan, a way of testing Snow so she could make an informed decision.
She would lay with him so he would rest though. It had become essential to him since his bloodlust had emerged. The more rested he was, the better able he was to fight his demons.
Demons. There was something she desired to know about him, and she couldn't hold her tongue now that she could finally speak with him about it. Curiosity drove her to ask.
“Fine,” she said and then paused before she blurted out, “Tell me why you went to Hell.”
Snow’s pale eyebrows drew together and his blue eyes darkened. “Why do you ask about those years?”
She didn’t want to cause him pain, or risk the memories of his time in Hell awakening another bout of bloodlust, but she had to know. “I cannot see into Hell, so I could not watch over you when you were there. Why did you go to that realm?”
Snow’s gaze dropped to his knees and his frown hardened. “I was drafted into the Preux Chevaliers after my father left the corps. It is tradition for the sons of the Aristocrats to spend some years in the corps, and often we enter them when another family member leaves.”
“Preux Chevaliers?” She wasn’t familiar with that term, and her grasp of the languages of this world was limited as she had only ever watched Snow. He had learned French in order to speak with Antoine and his family when they had lived in Switzerland, near the border with France. It sounded French.
“It means valiant knights.”
Even though he wore darkness like a second skin, the term suited Snow somehow. He was gallant at heart, a noble male. His mother had raised him well, teaching him to take care of those weaker than he was and to protect them. A true knight.
“You served for many centuries, and there were hundreds of years in which I could not see you because you were in Hell.”
Snow lifted his gaze to meet hers and a hint of a smile touched his lips. “You almost sound as if you missed me.”
And it almost seemed that it would please him if she admitted that she had in a way. She kept that to herself though.
“I’m merely curious about that world and what you did when there. Whenever you returned, you wore a haunted look, even when you played with Antoine.” She paused and frowned, her mind turning over what she had just said, and then stared deep into Snow’s eyes. “You mentioned that family members always join to take the place of one of their own within the ranks of this army. Antoine never joined the Preux Chevaliers.”
Snow’s eyes darkened a full shade again, his pupils narrowing in their centres and beginning to stretch into vertical slits. “No.”
That word came out hard and clipped, and Aurora sensed that he didn’t want her to push the subject. Unfortunately, curiosity told her to ignore his silent request and warning, and go ahead and voice the observation that lingered on the tip of her tongue.
“You wouldn’t let him. You refused to allow Antoine to enter the army to take your place, and everything I saw leaves me feeling that it was because whatever you witnessed… whatever you did in that wretched place… it sped the awakening of your bloodlust.”
Snow swallowed hard and cast his gaze away from her, the edges of his irises blazing red now. The tips of his fangs showed between his lips when he spoke, his voice dark and gravelly, rough with raw emotion that made her want to go to him and stroke his cheek to soothe him.
“I wanted to protect him.”
He closed his eyes and lowered his head, tendrils of his white hair falling down to mask one side of his handsome face. The muscle in his jaw tensed and he frowned again, silvery eyebrows knitting tightly together and his nostrils flaring.
She could feel his unease, his pain, from where she stood.
The emotions flowed across the room, wrapped around her, and pulled her to him. She edged a step closer, unsure what to say to take this new pain away.
She hated that she had been right.
Snow had done and seen terrible things in Hell, and it had awakened his bloodlust. He had refuse
d to allow Antoine to enter the Preux Chevaliers because he had known it would do the same to him, quickening the development of his bloodlust. He had wanted to protect his younger brother from the horror of serving in that army and becoming a slave to a dark affliction because of it.
“Snow,” Aurora started but faltered, still unsure what to say. She clenched and unclenched her hands, her fingers trembling. She ached to soothe him but she feared he wouldn’t accept it, and she didn’t think she could bear the pain of him rejecting her. “It was a noble thing you did.”
“He doesn’t know.” Snow scrubbed a hand over his face, tipped his head back and sighed. He slowly lowered his eyes to her again. “I never told him. He was so young at the time. I was over nine hundred when I joined because my… father left to spend more time and raise a second child with my…”
“You don’t need to… please, don’t push yourself, Snow.” Because she would hate herself if he relapsed all because she had forced him to talk about his family and his past. He had experienced difficulty when mentioning his mother and father by name ever since that terrible night and she knew in her heart that each time he spoke the words it pained him, lashing at him and cutting him deep.
He shook his head. “No… it is no problem. I was over nine hundred when I became a Preux Chevalier. For those four hundred long years, I saw things that made my skin crawl and did things that I am not proud of, and you are right… it changed me. When Antoine was born, I had already served for a century. I knew the moment I held him in my arms that I could never allow him to take my place. I could never let him go through what I had. A vampire only has to serve four centuries. When it came time for me to leave that hellish legion, I made it painfully clear to those in command that Antoine would never become what I had.”
Aurora cast her mind back to that time and recalled that around then many of her feathers had turned black at once, and she knew with chilling certainty that Snow had bloodied his hands in order to keep his brother safe.
“You killed your own kind.” She needed to hear him admit it before she would believe it.
Unleash (Vampire Erotic Theatre Romance Series Book 6) Page 11