by Nikki Rashan
Asia looked at me sitting there across from her, speechless. “Crazy, right?” she said. “Trust me, I’m a smarter woman now, and I will never, ever let that happen again. I’m still a nice person, and I don’t mind helping others, but draining my bank account for the sake of love . . . oh, I won’t be a fool twice.”
“I’m sorry that happened, Asia.”
“No need for sympathy. I’m all right now. After I graduated, I packed my bags and came here to start fresh.”
“Sounds like we have something in common.”
“Unfortunately, you’re right.” She diverted her eyes from me and scanned the small restaurant.
We sat a few moments in silence.
“Kyla, I know it’s late, but I’m not ready to leave you just yet,” Asia said in the sweetest tone I’d ever heard, her eyes conveying her not-so-subtle plea to extend our meeting.
Elated on the inside, I asked, “What would you like to do?”
“I don’t know. Anything really. I just want to keep talking to you.”
Though I knew Friday would be a busy day, I wasn’t going to let work or lack of sleep interfere with spending more time with the angel that sat before me. “I don’t want to leave you either, Asia. Follow me back to my place and go for a ride?”
“Yes, absolutely.” Asia reached for her small wristlet wallet and keys. She insisted on paying the small bill in reparation for waking me out of my sleep and for having waited so long for our date.
We walked outside to our individual cars, and Asia followed me to my apartment. She waited outside the complex while I parked my car in its underground spot and exited through the iron-fenced gate.
“It smells good in here,” I said after I hopped inside Asia’s truck and settled into the dark gray leather seat.
“Thanks. It’s some cherry something or other I picked up when I had the car detailed the other day.”
“It’s nice. So, where to?”
“We can just ride, I guess,” she said, putting the Lexus in drive.
“Hey, you’re not too sleepy to drive, are you?”
“No, I’m fine. My company is too good to fall asleep on,” she smiled. “So, tell me, did you give the ring back?”
I laughed. “You’re the first person to ask me that. Yeah, I gave it back. Not to him though. He really had no interest in seeing me, so I gave it to David. Jeff, my ex, picked it up from him.”
“David is your cousin I met the other day, right?”
“Yes.”
“And Marlon is his boyfriend, right?”
Again, I laughed. “How did you know?”
“Come on, Kyla, you’re kidding, right? I remembered you as soon as I saw you. Did you think you were that inconspicuous that day I took Mrs. Garfield for a walk? I saw you sitting in your car when I came back for the wheelchair.”
“Oh my God! Are you serious? I’m embarrassed now,” I said, turning my head toward the window.
“Aw, don’t be. You looked nice that day. And I thought about you that night, actually. You know how thoughts run through your mind at the end of the day? I was thinking you were pretty cute, but didn’t think I’d see you again. Soon as you turned around in Marlon’s kitchen, I was like, okay, something’s up. I knew it wasn’t just a coincidence.”
“Well, I’m not about to tell you the conversations I had after I saw you. I felt crazy pulling that stunt on you, but I really wanted to get to know you.”
“Why? What was it?”
“I don’t know. There was just something about you. I couldn’t help it. But the coffee meeting wasn’t my idea. Marlon concocted that on his own.”
“Well, I’m grateful he did.” Asia reached for my hand and kissed the back of it gently before taking hold of the steering wheel with both hands and continuing to drive the semi-quiet streets of Atlanta.
We were everything but quiet as we began talking about how we each grew up, and some of our dating experiences. Comparing our backgrounds, although states apart, Asia and I grew up in amazingly similar atmospheres. Her mom, a nurse by profession also, worked in the same hospital as did her father, who was an emergency room doctor. They met much older than when my own parents had united, as her parents were currently in their sixties and my parents were both fifty. Asia’s older brother arrived when her mom was thirty-three, and Asia entered the world just after her mom’s thirty-sixth birthday. Born premature, Asia spent two months under hospital care before being discharged home to her parents. I guess that’s why she carried such a glow about her. Surely the guardian angel that touched and healed her underdeveloped organs and bones continued to follow her through her every waking day.
Asia, and her brother, Jason, whom she was close with, attended a Catholic school from kindergarten until they graduated high school at the top of their classes. Attending college was never an option for her and her sibling; it was a requirement. Opting to attend school in another Texan city, Asia left home with a lifetime savings in the bank, courtesy of her parents. In college she explored her sexuality with a boyfriend, who attended Texas Southern University, and with several women on her own campus, eventually defining herself as a lesbian.
News traveled swiftly back to her parents after Asia confided in her brother of passionate love affairs she shared with female classmates. Asia had thought nothing of sharing these encounters with her brother, since he’d initiated such conversations with her about his own campus indiscretions. Asia’s parents, overcome with disappointment, insisted she begin visits with a counselor to determine where they had gone wrong. Surely, the counselor would fill in the missing piece of the puzzle.
At Asia’s adamant confirmation that love and sex were better with a woman than with a man, her parents gave in to the idea that their daughter was bisexual, just going through a phase. Once she got it out of her system, men would resurface.
After Asia nearly went broke supporting the gold-digging cheater while in school, her parents realized only a woman in true love would so willingly give so much of herself and her checkbook. They came to terms with her being a lesbian. Approving of her move to Atlanta, her parents gifted her with a new Lexus LX to aid in a smooth road trip across the South.
Since her stay in Atlanta, Asia met and dated only a handful of women, nothing compared to the dozens of women I had entertained. After a brief stint with a Columbus woman whose constant demands of unreciprocated late-night drives had taken its toll, Asia had temporarily given up on finding a woman. She wasn’t desperate enough to consider a relationship with a woman who hadn’t made any effort to drive to see her in two months.
Only a few days separated Asia’s breakup, and the first time I laid eyes on her.
“What’s her name?” I asked cautiously, mentally trying to retrace my steps of a weekend in Columbus and a young woman who I met and spent some quality time with.
“Her name was Deidra,” she said, eyeing me sideways. “Why? You think you know her?”
“Deidra? Hmmm,” I teased, mentally scrolling through the numbers in my phone. “Nah, not her. But, anyway, you just said that you were done dating. So, tell me if I’m wrong, but this is a date, right? I mean, you called me in the middle of the night asking me out and all.”
“Of course, it’s a date. I didn’t ask you all those questions just because I like asking questions. In my heart I know I want to love, but I’m tired of meeting women that I don’t connect with. I figured I needed to get the fundamentals out of the way, especially if you want to be with a woman, because there are plenty of women out there that really just don’t know.”
“Who are you telling? I mean, I admit that I was once one of them, but I’ve dated enough women torn between a man and a woman to know there are a whole lot of them struggling with that issue.”
“Let’s not even go there, because I know we could be up all night talking about that one,” Asia replied. “You know, earlier you said that we had something in common about both of our hearts being broken. And I’m thinking that we
have something else in common too.”
“What’s that?”
“We’re both scared to love again,” she stated.
This, by far, was the most personal I had gotten with any woman on a first date. Hell, since I got to Atlanta, considering I only opened up to Nakia a few days prior. “Interesting you should say that. I just got up the courage to admit that recently.”
“How much longer do you plan to hold on to that fear?”
I stared at Asia intensely, trying to determine why she was digging so deep into my heart so quickly. So fearlessly. Like a woman seeking the antidote for her solitude, she left no territory unexplored. “I want to it let go,” I said softly.
“But are you ready to let go?”
“Are you?”
“I asked you the question, Kyla, but I’ll answer first if you don’t know your answer. Yes, I’m ready. I’ve been ready for a while. That doesn’t mean I’m not scared, but I can’t let my fear run my life either,” she said, echoing Nakia’s words of wisdom.
“Yes, Asia, I’m ready.”
Asia smiled. “I’m almost convinced.”
“Can I prove it to you?”
“Yes, please do.”
“May I?” I asked, gesturing toward an empty lot we were nearing.
Asia pulled in and parked between two yellow lines.
“Come here.” I opened my door and went to the back seat.
Asia followed.
“I think this was meant to be,” I whispered in her ear. I didn’t worry that I had taken this first date too far.
“I think you’re right.”
I leaned forward and placed my lips on Asia’s slightly parted mouth. Thank you I said to myself and to the stars that aligned our paths so perfectly, destined to cross at a time no sooner and no later than designed.
When we separated, Asia seductively licked her lips. “Tasty,” she said.
“You’re beautiful.”
“Back to you.” Asia kissed my lips.
We kissed, and kissed, and kissed. For a moment I felt like a frisky high school girl, having spent two evenings in a row smooching and cuddled up in a car. Asia laid me down, her slim and delicate body on top of mine, and we kissed some more, until our bodies commanded rest.
We dozed in the back seat of Asia’s car, my body snuggled next to hers, and her arm wrapped around my waist. When the sounds of passersby leaving a nearby club stirred us, we awoke, kissed one more time, and got back into the front seat of the luxury vehicle.
While Asia drove back to my apartment, we didn’t say much, mostly sharing affectionate smiles and glances. Outside of my building, Asia pulled next to a car parked at the curb. It was still dark, though the moon had begun its descent into the blue night sky.
She leaned forward and rested her head sideways against the steering wheel, looking at me with amazingly beautiful sleepy eyes. “Thanks, Kyla. I had a great time.”
“Me too.”
“I’ll talk to you soon?” she asked.
“Of course. I’ll call you later, okay.”
“Okay.”
We smiled at each other, trying to say good-bye, even though we didn’t want to. It almost felt like we were about to tell each other, “I love you.” We embraced over the console that separated us and exchanged one last kiss before I exited the car and walked to the locked gate.
I turned to wave and found Asia staring at my backside. My knees trembled a little. She grinned when we caught eyes, and waved back.
Inside my apartment, my body collapsed on my bed in exhaustion, but the inner joy I felt couldn’t be contained. I turned on my laptop.
kyla69: she’s the best thing that has happened 2 me. can u believe it?
bottomsup: sometimes it only takes a conversation
kyla69: its real. i can feel it already
bottomsup: i’m happy 4 u baby. treat her right, k?
kyla69: don’t worry. i will. this is the same feeling i had before
bottomsup: honey where one luv is lost, another one awaits
kyla69: 4 both of us
bottomsup: yes, 4 both of us
kyla69: time 4 u to make ur rounds?
bottomsup: yep, gotta go
kyla69: see u soon
bottomsup: smooches
Instant messaging with David had become a fun way for us to keep tabs on one another and a useful tool in keeping him awake while he sat in the security office monitoring various hidden cameras throughout the company. Many nights I’d leave a peacefully sleeping beauty in my bed and log on and talk to him. David would harass me about my latest conquest and scold me in bold capital letters across the screen. If my prayers had been answered, those days were finally over.
Even though I was still floating from my meeting with Asia, I opted for a catnap, which did my body wonders, and by 6:30 a.m., I was wide-awake and full of energy, singing along to the latest R&B hits on the radio while searching for an outfit.
A gray pantsuit with a silk pink cami fit my mood for the day. The caressing of silk against my skin reminded me of Asia’s gentle brushes of her body against mine and her fingertips down my arm. Just the thought reverted me back to daydreaming of the kisses we shared just a short time before, but my cell phone rang, zapping me out of my dream state.
The caller ID flashed TIFFANY.
Damn, what in the hell does she want this early in the morning? “Hey, Tiff,” I said cheerfully, sharing my festive attitude. Except, Tiffany was clueless as to what, or rather, who had me so happy.
“Hey, sexy,” she said in her best midnight-love radio voice.
I tell you, that girl could sing me a bedtime lullaby anytime (pre-Asia, of course). So many nights I’d wrap her in my arms and she’d hum a tune, or softly sing a romantic song until we both drifted off to sleep. I’d lay my palm against her chest and feel the vibrations as she seduced me with her lyrics. Yet, even in those most intimate moments, I knew she wasn’t the one.
“Where have you been?”
And that was precisely the reason why. Tiffany turned out to be possessive as hell. When I pulled twelve- and fourteen-hour days, she easily left three to four messages “just checking in.” In reality she was trying her damnedest to occupy my every free moment and ensure that no other woman was taking up my time. More than once I reminded her that I wasn’t ready to settle down. Truth was, she, along with every other woman I had encountered, hadn’t sparked the desire in me to want to settle down. Asia was my dream come true. I knew it. She was well worth the wait.
“I had a busy day, Tiff.”
“Oh,” she said. “I miss you, Kyla. Can I see you?”
Should I? Shouldn’t I? Did one date with Asia automatically translate into happily ever after? Was I supposed to cut all ties with Tiffany and the few dawdlers that remained, and profess my newfound monogamy? I knew the answer to those questions, as I had already let Angie go two days prior.
“Why don’t you meet me for lunch today?” I suggested.
“What time?” she asked, sounding excited.
“Two o’clock. I’ll be outside the store.”
“See you later, baby,” she said sweetly.
“Um, yeah, okay. Bye.”
Shit! Let a woman into your bed a few times (well, more than a few times) and she automatically thinks she’s your girlfriend. But what could I say? I felt as if I had fallen in love with Asia the instant I saw her, and we hadn’t even slept together yet.
A twinge of guilt crept through my veins as I realized I had lied to Tiffany and to all of the others. Meeting Asia hadn’t changed me. I’d always had love to give, and with Asia, my desire to be in love again had resurfaced. I prayed Tiffany would understand that I no longer wanted to see her.
David strolled in shortly after seven while I was sitting at our nook flipping through the most recent issue of InStyle magazine. In my profession, it was a must to stay on top, if not ahead, of what was hot and what was not.
“Hola, chica. Check you out. You lo
ok so happy,” he said before kissing me on the cheek.
“Pinch me, David. I’m scared to wake up and find out she’s not real.”
“To have you glowing like that, she must be the bona fide package.”
“Yep.” I folded the corner of a page as a reminder to review the Ralph Lauren ad displayed on it.
“Guess I won’t be seeing her at Marlon’s place,” he said, referring to the passing of Mrs. Garfield.
“No, not anymore. But I was thinking I would invite her over for dinner next week and cook up something for you, Marlon and Kia also.”
“Aw snap! You? In the kitchen cooking? Hot damn!” he shouted.
We both laughed.
“You and Marlon just better have your asses here Tuesday at seven. Bring MJ too.”
“Of course, baby doll,” he said, loosening his tie and unbuttoning his shirt.
“Go get some rest, sweetie, I’m about to get to work.”
“I am, babe. I’m tired as hell.”
“Will I see you later?”
“Honey, you know I’m going to see my man.”
“Damn, David! I never get to see you anymore.” I pouted playfully.
“But you know I still love you, right?”
I smiled and kissed him good-bye before heading out the door and driving to work. My mind wandered to and rested on Asia the entire ride. A part of me was still amazed that I had spent the night with the woman I had spent a couple of weeks fantasizing about; first eager to know her name, then jittery about our first meeting, nauseated that she hadn’t called, and finally, overjoyed that our feelings were mutual.
Maybe it was the pep in my walk or the “Happy Friday” I shared with everyone as I walked to my office, because even though I hadn’t seen Gary, he called me in to see him within minutes of my arrival.
“Happy Friday, Gary,” I said when I entered his office.
Gary sat anxiously on the edge of his desk, hands folded in his lap. “You’re awfully chipper today, Kyla. I must not be working you hard enough,” he joked.
“That’s bullshit, Gary, and you know it,” I said, chuckling.
“Who’s the lucky new lady?” he asked quickly.