Crushing On The Geek (Crushing On You)

by Sarah Adams

  “Yeah..” he paused, “but I wasn't there.”

  “You just wait! You just wait until they do something and you have to believe what's going on.”

  “Even if they are real, if you ignore them, they'll go away.”

  “I doubt it,” Tamara said, turning on her heels.

  “Tamara,” Hayden said again. Tamara liked how her name sounded on his lips and the way his brow creased in frustration.

  “What?”

  “Can we start this conversation over?”

  “Not unless you have a time machine,” Tamara said.

  “Then can I apologize again?”

  “I don't know, can you?”

  “Fine,” he sighed, “May I apologize again.”

  “Permission granted to grovel,” Tamara smirked.

  “I was trying to ask if you wanted to hang out some time this week?”

  “That's not groveling,” Tamara said, arms crossed.

  “I know, but I'm above groveling. So, what do you say?”

  “You think I'm crazy and you want to hang out with me?”

  “I never said you were crazy,” Hayden sighed.

  “Might as well have.”

  “I'm sorry.”

  “We'll talk later,” Tamara sighed and turned on her heels again, just in time for the bell to ring.

  By third period Tamara was exhausted and debating whether or not she was going to tell Amber about leaving the lip gloss and yesterday at the library. She was still mulling it over when she arrived at their lockers to find that Amber hadn't arrived or had headed on to drama class without her. Tamara pretended not to notice Hayden talking with Greg and the others across the hall.

  Her stomach churned as she walked past the group. Hayden tapped her shoulder and when she turned to look slipped a note into the side pocket of her backpack. Tamara scurried away pretending not to notice the dirty look Cindy and the others shot her. Were they bad mouthing her? Was he only talking to her to get dirt for the Chess Club? Tamara wanted to hit her head against the wall, but instead she stifled her cry of frustration by biting her lip and power walking to class, determined to find Amber and tell her everything.

  The drama classroom was noisy and crowded, but Tamara forced her way through the crowd searching for her BFF.

  “Have you seen Amber?” Tamara asked, one of her classmates.

  “I think she went home,” the girl said, twirling a lock of hair around her forefinger and smacking her lips, before producing a bubble of orange gum and sucking it in back into her mouth, “Her and Josh had a fight.”

  “Thanks,” Tamara sighed and sank into her desk.

  Maybe Mercury is in retrograde or something, Tamara thought, because everyone seems to be having a crappy day. Tamara was supposed to be mesmerizing her monologue from Hamlet, but instead she found herself tucked away in the bathroom calling Amber, again and again without getting an answer.

  Her phone's most likely dead again, she thought hanging up the phone for the last time. Remembering Hayden's note she sat down on the toliet seat and fumbled in the side pocket of her bag. An empty tube of lip gloss, two pennies, a nickel, and a leadless mechanical pencil littered the bottom of the pocket and kept the note from sinking to the bottom. She pulled it out and looked at the smooth white surface of the paper before unfolding it.

  Her fingers shook and her heart pounded against her ribcage. Tamara knew her anxiety wasn't going to abate until she knew what the note said.

  “Tamara,” it began.

  At least he spelled my name right, she thought.

  “Every time we talk I find a way to seem like an asshat. I've made a list of things I shouldn't have done or at least should have apologized for. I'm apologizing for everything on this list, though, I'm sure I've missed some.

  *Calling you a snob the first time I drove you home. *Acting like an ass because I knew more about chess,

  *Calling you without asking if it was okay first

  *Convincing you to steal apples with me,

  *Implying you were crazy/not believing you about the faeries,

  I'm still not sure what to think about the faeries, though. A lot of the stuff could have been anything, but what you saw at the library still has me stumped. I hope it's not too late to start over.

  --Hayden”

  Tamara read through the list and laughed. At least he admitted they stole the apples. Still, the note didn't seem like something a guy would right, at least not any guy Tamara had known or dated. Not sure what to think Tamara shoved the note back into her bag so she could show Amber later. Not wanting to get behind in drama Tamara shouldered her bag and headed out of the bathroom. She took the long way back to class, not wanting to get there too soon. The thought of the crowdedmonth anniversary room made her stomach churn. Why had she let Amber talk her into taking drama anyway?

  Amber still hadn't called Tamara back at lunch time, but Josh was sitting at their usual table. She considered telling him to get lost, but then decided to find out what happened first.

  “What's going on?” she asked sinking into her chair.

  “I'm not sure,” Josh said, “She wouldn't talk to me in math and then everyone's saying she went home. I don't know what I did.”

  “Heck, if I know. She won't answer her phone.”

  “I know,” Josh nodded.

  “Hey,” Hayden said, appearing and taking the chair next to Tamara, resting his elbow on the back on her chair.

  “Hi,” Tamara said and scooted the chair over. He was cute, but she didn't feel like being that physically close to anyone and she wasn't sure she trusted him.

  “Did you read my note?”

  “Yeah,” she nodded and took a bite of her pizza.

  “I'll leave you two alone,” Josh sighed, sliding his chair away from the table.

  “I'm sure she'll calm down soon, Josh,” Tamara said as he walked away.

  “What's up with him?” Hayden asked.

  “Amber is acting strange. He probably forgot their month anniversary or something,” Tamara shrugged, “and yes, I read your note.”

  “Do you forgive me?”

  “What's going on, Hayden? Be real.”

  “I was trying to apologize….”

  “No guy writes a note like that.”

  “Well, the last time I checked I'm a guy, so your logic proves faulty.”

  “You're doing it again, asshat,” Tamara rolled her eyes.

  “Sorry.”

  “Is Mercury in retrograde?” she asked.

  “What?”

  “Nothing,” Tamara laughed.

  “I don't know,” Hayden said a moment later, “Feels like it though. Everything I say you interupt as a declaration of war.”

  Tamara laughed despite her suspicions, “I don't think we're going to war, but with the look Cindy gave me this morning, I might be wrong.”

  “Oh, she's just angry because Greg broke up with her.”

  “Why?”

  “Said he needs to concentrate on his game and she was too clingy.”

  “She's threatening to quit the club.”

  “But if she does that we won't be able to compete!”

  “I know, but I don't think she will. She's just being all girly.

  “What's that supposed to mean?”

  “She wants revenge.”

  “Not all girls are like that.”

  “I know.”

  “So why did you call it acting girly?”

  “Okay, my vocabulary left something to be desired in that sentence,” Hayden laughed.

  “That it did,” Tamara grinned.

  “Do you want to get together after school and practice or something?”

  “I would, but I can't. My dad is making us all go to his law firm's dinner party.”

  “Oh, I forgot about that. My dad asked me if I wanted to go and I told him no, but if you're going to be there, I might just make an appearence.”

  Chapter Eight

  Tamara decided it was w
orth the risk to sneak into her mom's bathroom and borrow her eyeliner. She shut the door and looked at her naked face in the mirror, trying to ignore the shouts that were traveling up the stairs. Fortunately, Tina and Tally's babysitter had already picked them up for the evening. Her mom had waited until the last minute to announce that she was going to a sale at the mall instead of to the dinner party. Tamara had managed to sneak away, just before the yelling started.

  Under normal circumstances, Tamara would have agreed with her Dad. They all knew that her mom shopped way too much and was always breaking plans and promises to get her jollies off on some sale. Tonight, Tamara was glad her mom wasn't going. She didn't want Hayden to meet her and think “Oh, that's what Tamara's going to be like in thirty years or so.” She couldn't imagine trying to bear of an evening of her mom and Hayden in the same room without dying of embarrassment. Add pissed-off faeries into the equation and the evening would surely bomb out.

  Her parents were still yelling when she finished doing her makeup and hair, making it easy for Tamara to creep back into her own room. She turned the handle on the door slowly as she took a deep breath. Since eating the apple Tamara was never sure what might be waiting for her on the other side. She eased the door open and looked around before stepping inside. Everything seemed to be in its place, but Tamara stepped carefully, as if she were quiet enough the faeries would ignore her like her parents did.

  She slipped into the black dress she had bought for the Halloween dance. At least, I'm getting the chance to wear it, she thought as she smoothed it's knee length skirt and made sure her boobs were going to stay securely inside. Tamara wasn't going to risk a wardrobe malfunction at such an important dinner. It didn't matter if her dad didn't know exactly why it was important to her.

  “Tamara,” Mr. Page said from the other side of the door, “Are you ready, baby?”

  “I just need to get my tights and shoes on,” she called back.

  “I'm going to warm the car up.”

  “I'll be down soon.”

  Tamara hurriedly slipped into her things and sprinted to the bathroom to check her reflection one more time. She couldn't wait until this was over and she could put her mirror back up. Nothing had happened since she left the lip gloss, but Tamara wasn't willing to risk it just yet. Fortunately, her mom had already left to go shopping, so Tamara didn't have to answer the usual questions she did when her mom felt she was dressed up 'too much.' Tonight, would definitely count as too much. Tamara ran her fingers through her weave and bit her lip.

  “If you guys are listening,” she said, addressing the faeries, “Please, leave me alone tonight. I'm sorry I took the apple, but I've paid you back. Please, just let me get through tonight. I promise you'll have lots of chances to laugh at me without creating them.”

  Tamara thought she heard giggling in the distance. Grabbing her bag and shawl she headed out, locking the door behind her. Tamara pulled her shawl close to her body, trying to block out the chill of the wind. Tree branches shook from its force and she had to walk with one hand on the skirt of her dress to keep it down. She sighed with relief when she sank into the passenger seat of her dad's car.

  “You look nice tonight,” he grinned at her. Tamara thanked him, but was hit by a pang of guilt. She shouldn't be happy that her mom bailed. He was still upset, making her feel more selfish than she had in awhile.

  “Sorry about Mom,” she said as the car pulled out of the drive.

  “Don't be,” he shook his head, “It's not your fault.”

  “I know, it's just..”

  “She's always pulling something like this?” he finished her thought.

  “Yeah.”

  “Well, forget about her for now,” he grinned, “I'm glad we have a chance to talk.”

  “Are you guys getting divorced?” Tamara asked, her hands balled into fists at her side.

  “No!” he laughed, “What would be the point after all these years? I don't want to talk about her. I want to talk about you.”

  “Oh.”

  “You've been acting weird since you started Chess Club,” he said, glancing at his daughter through the rear-view mirror.

  “It sucks, sort of,” Tamara said.

  “Well, I know you're upset over the coach and volleyball,” he said, “but are you okay?”

  “Yeah, I'm fine,” Tamara nodded, “There's just a lot of things going on.”

  “Like Amber getting a serious boyfriend?”

  “This isn't about Amber!” Tamara said, feeling bad that she hadn't tried to call Amber since third period.

  “No, it's about you,” he said, “I know how it is when the person you've hung out with forever suddenly starts dating and gets serious about someone. It can leave you feeling left out.”

  “That's not it,” Tamara shook her head.

  “Then what is it, Tamara?”

  “Can I ask you a question?”

  “Sure, you know you can ask me anything. I might not always know the answer, though,” Mr. Page chuckled.

  “Should you believe a guy when he apologizes?”

  “Is this about Doug?”

  “No, I haven't talked to Doug since the dance. He's old news.”

  “Then which guy are we talking about?”

  “You don't know him. He's new at school.”

  “What's he apologizing for?”

  “Well, saying some stuff.”

  “Stuff?” Mr. Page arched a eyebrow in question.

  “Nothing, like that. No, he's not starting rumors about me. I'd slug him if he was doing that,” Tamara laughed, “That would make things easier.”

  “Well, since you're not wanting to tell your ole dad what's going on, I'll say this. If he's made an ass out of himself, it's probably because he likes you. Most guys just don't know what to say to a pretty girl, who's also smart, athletic, and nice. That combination can really intimidate a guy.”

  “Maybe,” Tamara laughed.

  “No, really it can,” Mr. Page said as they pulled into the parking lot of the hotel. The law firm always rented the ballroom out for dinner parties after winning a big case. Although, since they had to rent it weeks in advance, sometimes they had a pity dinner if the case was lost, thankfully this wasn't one of those times.

  Tamara's dad let her out in front of the door before parking the car. To escape the howling wind she waited inside the lobby. She tapped her foot and then bounced on the balls of her feet. Was Hayden already inside? Would he be wearing a suit like the sons of the other lawyers? She tried to imagine him in a suit, but failed.

  “Ready?” her dad asked, appearing at her side.

  “I'm starving, so I hope they get to the point and don't talk our heads off,” Tamara laughed.

  “Me too,” he nodded, “but I think we're early.”

  “We're always early.”

  “I like it that way,” he said as they entered the ballroom.

  The ballroom was crowded with lawyers from both Mr. Page's firm and others, most of whom seemed to have brought along their families. Through the crowd Tamara spotted Hayden standing beside a man whom he looked very much like. Hayden had inherited his broad shoulders, mess brown hair, and brown eyes from his dad. The man laughed at something and Tamara added his smile to the list. Hayden must have felt her staring at him, because he turned in her direction and grinned. She smiled back and gave a tiny wave, hoping her dad wouldn't notice. Hayden was wearing a suit, but had discarded the jacket somewhere along the way. His tie had some design on it, but she couldn't tell what it was from where she was.

  “You know that kid?” Mr. Page asked.

  “Yeah, he's in the Chess club too.”

  “He's the guy you were talking about in the car.”

  “Why would you think that?”

  “He looks like the sort of kid that would make a fool of himself if he tried to talk to a girl,” Mr. Page chuckled.

  “Shh!”

  “What? Afraid your old man is going to embarrass you?”
<
br />   “No, I know you will before the night's done. Should I resign myself to the fact?”

  “Nah, I'll try to behave.”

  “Please do.”

  “His dad's a good lawyer. I worked with him on this case.”

  “Good to know,” Tamara said, “Can we quit talking about it now? He's walking our way.”

  “Fine. I'll shut up,” Mr. Page laughed.

  “Hey,” Hayden said, pulling her into a quick hug. Startled, Tamara almost tripped over her own feet, but manage to right herself by the time he pulled away.

  “Dad, this is Hayden. He's in the Chess Club,” Tamara said, pretending the previous conversation hadn't taken place. “This is my dad.”

  “You can call me George,” Mr. Page extended his hand.

  “Nice to meet you,” Hayden said, grinning at Tamara.

  “You too,” Mr. Page said, “I'm going to see if they have the appetizers out yet.”

  “See you later, Dad,” Tamara laughed.

  “You look nice tonight,” Hayden said, “Not that you don't always look nice….”

  “Thank you,” Tamara cut him off before he made a fool of himself again, “Let's get something to drink and find somewhere in the back to sit.”

  “In the back?”

  “Yeah, that way we can talk why they make their speeches and we won't look rude.”

  “Fair enough,” Hayden laughed.

  “You haven't been to any of these parties, have you?” Tamara grinned.

  “No,” he shook his head.

  “Attend enough of them and you'll be texting under the table. I usually bring Amber along, but she's..”

  “Fighting with Mr.Kissy Face.”

  “Yeah,” Tamara nodded.

  “A soda please,” Tamara said to the bar tender.

  “Make that two.”

  “Sure,” the bartender said, and handed them each a can of soda.

  “Where to?” Hayden asked.

  “This way,” Tamara lead him through the maze of people. Stopping now and then to say hello to people she had met at previous parties.

  “You know everyone,” Hayden laughed.

  “Not everyone, just most of them,” Tamara said, sinking down into a chair at the back left corner of the room. “It's a job hazard of being a child of the firm.”