by Milana Jacks
“See ya later.” Ready to leave, I picked up the tray. The beast asked for tea and meds. From my pocket, I gave him the three small vials of liquid meds Hasel had given me, along with instructions on when to take them. Despite her instructions, he unplugged all three and drank them together, taking three times the amount Hasel had recommended. A moment later, he slumped, asleep. I didn’t give a shit. For all I cared, he could die. They all could.
I checked his dressing. Looked clean to me.
A whisper escaped his lips.
I sat down beside him so I could hear better.
The beast kept whispering. I leaned in closer, then put my hand on his chest so I wouldn’t fall on him as I put my ear to his mouth. Man, if he woke up like this, he could snap my head off with those big jaws. Except, those meds worked wonders. I’d taken one once and got knocked out for an entire day.
He spoke Tineyan.
I gave up on trying to understand. But there was something else. I lifted my hand from his chest. A round scar. I traced it with a fingertip. It gave me chills. A bullet wound from a large bullet. A shotgun bullet with a small gauge. The kind that killed large animals like beasts? Maybe.
Served him right. If only all of us humans had those bullets so we could defend ourselves. I’d been at this community since before the raid. After I’d run from the circus where Men of Earth tried to hold me, I found this place. Momma Jo and her husband took me in as if I were one of their many daughters. They put clothes on my back and fed me, until the morning I woke up with Hunters of Mayhem inside the community. Silent and fast, by the time we roused, they’d seized control.
Momma Jo’s husband had protested and praised Men of Earth for their cause. Rightfully so. Hunters had come and stolen his home from under his nose. Hasel didn’t like him, and any mention of Men of Earth tipped Hasel’s shit. She’d cooked Momma Jo’s husband. Since then, I stopped eating meat altogether.
I left the beast’s room.
Before the hunters invaded the community, women and children slept in the east wing and the few men in the west. I knew from the girls in Dewlyn’s shelter that community life varied, and this community separated men from women. I found that strange. Apart from a small sheet I got to hang over my bed for privacy, Daddy and I had never separated.
Up in Big Bear, life got boring with just me and Dad, but having lived here for a while after I escaped the circus, I wouldn’t trade my secluded upbringing with any girl from this community. These women had never stepped outside the gates, never hunted for their own food, never left the property, at least not unchaperoned.
Daddy had protected me from beasts, but Daddy hadn’t caged me, just always said I should do anything I set my mind to. Because my dad was the best. At least much better than most dads I’d heard of back in the shelters.
The hunters settled into the west wing and also completely took over the main kitchen, while we stayed in our wing in the east. This worked for everyone and especially for me. I kept to myself and my kind.
In the kitchen, I washed the dishes, then walked through the sanctuary, a large open space people used for worship. Hasel had set up six tables, saying we’d all eat here together one day. Apart from the small alcove Hasel had left for the women to use for daily prayer, the sanctuary looked like the holy cafeteria.
Momma Jo refused to pray in the sanctuary, and the others followed her example. She wouldn’t use a place tainted by the beasts, she’d said. I didn’t pray, so I didn’t care what they used. I believed in God, just hadn’t ever attended a place of worship. If I needed a word with God, I’d think it in my head anywhere, anytime. He’d hear me or not.
Through the sanctuary, I entered our wing. It appeared busy. In the large family room girls sat on several old couches in colors ranging from the bright yellow one Cole liked to the black sofa Momma Jo used. I kept to the left wall, tried to make it into my room unnoticed.
Today, I’d wasted time on the wounded beast. I could’ve stuck the sticks I’d gotten from the kitchen earlier today into the ground and marked the southwest desert part just in case Dad came from that direction.
If I needed to babysit the beast’s sanity, I couldn’t mark. According to Hasel, after the loss of his leg, the beast would likely contemplate suicide. I couldn’t fix him or replace his leg, but a man in better spirits would recover faster. I could find a way to lift his spirits. In turn, he’d stop moping around and wouldn’t need me anymore. So what I needed to do was get him sane. Or let him overdose on meds. Hm, I’d sleep on the two options. I almost made it through the family room, even had my hand on the door leading into the hallway that led into the sleeping quarters, when a hand landed on my shoulder.
I spun around and barked, “What?”
Cole reared back. His blue eyes a darker shade than mine, widened. “What’s up your ass?” he asked.
“Don’t curse.”
“I can curse.”
I shrugged. “Whatever.”
“Guess who’s moving to the beast side?”
“Not me.”
“Correcto-mundo.” He stuck a thumb into his chest. “Me. Gonna be the first ever human hunter.”
I doubted very much Hunters of Mayhem would let a human boy become a part of their tribe. We lived in one wing, they in the other, and during supper, we kept on our side of the community. I didn’t even know why Momma Jo allowed Cole to hang out with the beasts, but I guessed she’d given up on her youngest after her older son’s disappearance since the raid. Momma Jo believed him dead too. The beasts swore he’d run off and left his mother and sisters to their mercy. I rolled my eyes and pushed through the door. Cole followed. “You don’t believe me.”
“Nope.” Three, five… I counted the room numbers on one side of the hallway. Three steps to seven.
“Momma wants to talk to you.”
At my door, I leaned my shoulder on the wood, and crossed my arms over my chest. “What about?”
“Don’t know.”
“You know. Tell me.”
He shook his head.
“Fine, I won’t go, and you can tell her you forgot to give me the message.” I entered my room. Our room, the one I shared with four other girls. I walked past the row of four beds to sit on the gray blanket covering my single bed in the corner by the window. Daddy and I had shared a large bunker, and I’d also shared a room with several girls inside the shelter in Beast City. I couldn’t complain, and lack of privacy didn’t bother me. At least in this wing, I bathed with other girls and not with those monsters on the other side.
Georgina, one of the girls, rested on her bed. A hijab covered her long brown hair. Her dress covered the rest of her body, and she looked perfectly serene reading her holy book.
“Hi,” I said.
“Heard you dragged another beast here,” she said by way of greeting. “As if we don’t have enough.”
I ignored the jab and grabbed my soap and towel.
Cole answered her. “Mind your business.”
Georgina huffed out a breath as she got out of bed and pushed past Cole. He closed the door behind her.
A strange odor drifted inside. I nearly gagged. “Ew,” I said and scrunched up my nose.
“Momma’s cooking,” he said.
“What’s she cooking?”
“Mixing herbs for medicine. You know, for you girls.” Cole blushed.
“If Hasel finds out she’s cooking up contraceptives again, there’ll be hell to pay. Meh.” I swatted my hand through the air. “You know what? I don’t care, I just wish Momma Jo’d let us air out the rooms.”
The beasts didn’t bother the women who huddled in this wing. Some of the women had suffered from a prolonged sickness that had come upon the community this winter. When Hasel tried helping them, Momma Jo threw a fit and forbade her daughters from taking anything from the beasts or even mixing with the beasts, so the ones who made it through the infection were still recovering. Three girls had died.
Once, I made a mistake and s
nuck meds back into the east wing. Momma Jo found out and warned me she’d kick me out if I ever did something like it again. So I did nothing. I stayed out of people’s way and minded my own business, even though I knew those three girls would’ve lived if only she’d let me help. Her kids, her cause, her business.
I helped out on the beast side of the community because Hasel asked me to. Momma Jo didn’t care if I went there as long as I kept my mouth shut about what went on around here. Like how we couldn’t open the windows because the smell of herbs Momma Jo cooked would spread on the wind and the beasts might come, drawn to the strange scent. Hasel had confiscated the first batch Momma Jo had made us drink. It tasted god-awful, but hey, I hadn’t had my period in January. If nothing else, the tea kept the cramps away. Last week, when I got my monthly again, boy, I wished for it.
Cole leaned against the door. “She wants to know about the new beast.”
“Go and tell her.”
“I’m not allowed.”
“Why not?”
“Hunters don’t yap.”
“Ha! They yap all the time.”
“Amongst one another.”
“You are not one of them.”
He pinched his lips. “I will be.”
I sighed. “Cole. It’s not good for you to think of yourself as a beast. Beasts aren’t what they appear to be. They are not kind, not nice, and sure as heck don’t care about human males. They take whatever they want, whenever they want.”
“What did they take from you?”
“My Dad.”
“I’m sorry. I didn’t know.”
“They took yours too. And your brother.”
“No, they didn’t. Not my brother.”
“Sure they did. Even if he’d left the community, he’s not here, so they took him away.”
“I shot my brother.”
My mouth dropped. “Wha…? I didn’t know.”
“Nobody knows. Kiera, my sister, was dying of flu. Medicine is out there”—he pointed at the window—“somewhere, and I asked permission to go get it. He refused, saying our prophet Tom would come and save us. Tom never came. Instead of Tom, the hunters came. But not before my sister died and my brother tried to escape. My brother was a coward, and my dad was a dumbass who got himself served as a meal.”
I cleared my throat. “Exactly. In the food chain, the beasts are above us. At worst, we are food. At best, we are pets. They like us, but they don’t need us. Don’t forget that.”
“That’s not true. They have fated mates, human girls.”
I rolled my eyes. “Those are their fairy tales. There’s no such thing as mates.”
“Zarik talks about his mate.”
“They are monsters!” I shouted, fists clenched at my sides.
Cole’s eyes watered, and I felt a pang of guilt in my chest. At eight years old, he stood tall for his age and bulky. And because of his size and the things he’d lived through, it was easy to forget he was just a small boy. “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have screamed at you.”
“Don’t forget about Momma,” he said and slammed the door behind him.
Momma Jo lived in her own part of the wing at the very end of the hall. She had privacy and a small kitchen, a single bedroom, and her own bathroom, unlike the rest of us who shared rooms of either five or seven beds. The people here had grown up together, most of them closely related to each other, whereas I showed up on their doorstep one day asking for food and shelter after I’d run from Maurice and his gangsters who’d occupied the circus.
I ran from Men of Earth but had enough sense not to mention it. It wasn’t until the prayer time one night that I discovered everyone at this community believed in their prophet Tom, who happened to lead Men of Earth. Even then I stayed. I had nowhere else to go. Besides, the people here weren’t violent, and, unlike Maurice, they didn’t intend to use me for breeding.
I rapped on Momma Jo’s door and waited. She didn’t answer. After a while, I snuck inside and quickly closed the door so that the odor didn’t spread. Momma Jo was cooking something smelling like rotten eggs topped with pigeon crap. It burned the inside of my nose and the back of my mouth, and stung my eyes. My stomach rose, and I put the soap wrapped in a towel over my mouth and nose. I inhaled lavender.
“A mask is on the right, by the door,” Momma Jo said.
I got a white mask. It looked light but felt quite heavy and padded with something. I pulled it over my face. When I breathed, the air came back stale but not stinging. I rubbed my eyes, then noticed goggles on her bed. I put a pair on, then peeked inside her bathroom. Fumes rose from the tub. Momma Jo bent over something inside there, her body completely covered in clear plastic, her face under a green mask.
“I’ll be right out,” she said.
I sat back on the bed and waited for her. It wasn’t too long, but long enough for me to notice seven small vials with clear liquid inside them. She’d already extracted some solution and would mix it into tea. Momma Jo came out, fumes fanning around her black-robe-clad body like mist, her thick black hair pulled back and secured under a hijab. She moved quickly and lit several candles and sticks, then proceeded to chant and wave her sticks through the room. The entire room filled with smoke.
It stank of the incense they used during prayer, and I was glad to have the mask on. The smell, although pleasant, was laced with some sort of a drug that made me happy. Being happy for no reason was great, but floating about the community as if on a cloud wasn’t my idea of a great time. I’d much rather set my markers for my father around the community, for which I needed a clear head.
Momma Jo sat beside me, her brown eyes a bit glossy. I wondered how she hadn’t keeled over and died from all the fumes she’d inhaled. She folded her hands over mine, and I stared down at our joined hands. I welcomed the soft touch. Daddy could be comforting, but his hands were big and calloused, so this woman’s touch felt more motherly. Momma Jo was kind to me. “Sienna dearest, I hear we have a new beast man in our Community.” She slid off my mask.
Yuck. I tried not to gag on the stench. “Yes.”
“Has she fed him yet?”
“She” was Hasel. Momma Jo didn’t like to say her name. “She fed him,” I said, then added, “Pork.” No humans were harmed in today’s beast feeding.
“Good. This is good.”
“You’re worried,” I said.
Momma Jo nodded. “I fear more beasts will come.”
“I doubt it. They have Beast City and New City. Gone City, I hear, is on the rise. We just get the stray crazies out here.”
She snickered. “I hope you’re right. Have you made friends with any of them?”
“No, Momma Jo. I don’t like the beasts. Like you, I have to keep my head down.”
“For now.”
Poor thing. She believed Men of Earth would come for her and her daughters. The communities hoped for a better life, more resources, and Tom promised them more if they agreed to follow him. Regardless of their primary religion, somehow he got through to them, kept uniting communities for his cause. I believed him to be an insane man, and I knew Men of Earth avoided the beasts. They wouldn’t attempt to rescue her. “Yes, for now,” I sighed, my body relaxing as the minutes wore on. I had to get out of the room, or I’d end up spending the day giggling at the blank wall.
Momma Jo glanced at the incense and lit another stick. “One more mouth to feed.”
“Excuse me?”
“The beast is one more mouth to feed.”
Ah. Habits and hard life died hard. This community was poor. From what I gathered, they’d rarely traded anything with outsiders, and any contact with beasts was prohibited. The last beast to come over the walls to pick up his bride found her hanging at the gates. She wore a white dress and swung in the wind. That was two decades ago. The people here had built this wing on top of her grave so that she might bless them with her heroics. They considered the girl a martyr and hadn’t had contact with the outside world until Tom dropped by l
ast year.
They jumped on his prophecy wagon, which included long stretches of fasting. The fasting helped with food rations but couldn’t curb the fear they might run out. People here lived a hard life, and Momma Jo worried about her kids. Another beast as large as Torrent would need lots of meat. “I wouldn’t worry about food,” I said, not believing it myself. The beasts ate humans and could snap at us at any time. “They have supplies coming in once a week, and we all have plenty to eat.”
“And when we don’t, she will cook me.”
No doubt, Hasel would cook her for those vials. Hasel kept the women in case the beasts would pair with some of them. Contraception went against her dream of having more beast babies roaming this planet. And if not Hasel, Mayhem would punish Momma Jo for it. He was big on babies. God knows I’d heard him trying with Reagan.
At the thought, my cheeks burned. I lowered my gaze to our joined hands. They wavered before my eyes. Darn it. I got high again. I shrugged, not feeling that bad about it. Maybe I’d go to bed. Relax a little.
“I am happy you’re on our side,” she said. “I worried you’ve become infatuated with the animals like my poor boy Cole. He wants to move to their wing, did you know?”
“Mm-hm.”
“Devil’s spawn.” I frowned. What? Momma Jo continued, “I knew he was Devil’s spawn since my sister delivered him and he refused her tit. Mother’s milk is of Earth, therefore of God. We had to feed him cow milk.”
Oh! So Momma Jo was Cole’s aunt. Huh. “Right,” I agreed, thinking Daddy raised me on cow’s milk. Cole and I couldn’t be of the devil because cow’s milk was of Earth, thus of God too. Mooo. I didn’t tell her that.
I tried to be friendly with both matriarchs. I didn’t want conflict. It would make my life harder, not easier. Dad would say I’d lost my backbone. Well, maybe I had, because I sucked it up and, blissfully happy, left Momma Jo’s room.
Chapter Six
Torrent
If I didn’t eat today, I would die. I checked the time on the wall. Nineteen hundred. Hasel had visited me in the morning, promised she’d send Sienna with a breakfast tray and tchai. Sienna hadn’t come. Maybe she’d saved my life, then decided to starve me to death. Meds, I needed more meds. “Sienna!” I hollered for the tenth time.