by E M Lindsey
“Not now, kid.”
Spencer scoffed. “You may not be a Daddy, but I’m definitely not a kid, so that’s enough of that. And besides, I came out here to apologize.”
“Did you now?”
“I did. I was wrong to call you Daddy. You’re definitely more of an asshole than a Daddy.”
Spencer hopped off the stairs and headed toward their backpacks in the lot. Max’s was old and worn. Well-used from a lifetime of camping and hiking. Spencer’s on the other hand looked like he’d pulled the tags off in the back seat of his car.
“I am an asshole,” he agreed, standing up and brushing dirt off his ass. “And you’re not the first person to tell me that.”
“You seem fine to me,” Collin said, stepping out onto the stairs beside him.
“You have that gruff asshole vibe about you, too,” Spencer offered with a noncommittal shrug.
Max thought that might have meant Spencer found them both attractive, but again...didn’t matter.
“Right.” Collin clapped his hands together, ignoring Spencer’s comment. Max reasoned Collin was probably used to getting hit on by clients. He was a good looking guy—older, with more than a touch of gray in his hair, but muscles that looked like they were well-earned. “We need to hike for about four miles to get to the campsite. After that, we’ll set up our tents and have dinner, then in the morning, we’ll finish the last leg of the tour. It’s three miles to the rafting point, and at the end, another mile and a half to the busses. Sound alright with you lot?”
“Oh!” Spencer sounded surprised. “We’re going now?”
Max shoved his hand into his pocket.
“Right now,” Collin confirmed.
“I need to re-up my bug spray and sunscreen then. One second.” Spencer dropped his bag onto the ground and rifled through it, producing two aerosol cans. He closed his eyes and sprayed them both all over his face and all over the ground, then he tucked them away and re-shouldered the bag.
“Ready,” he proclaimed.
Collin offered Max a bemused look. “Er...right.”
Max picked up the rear again, following Spencer’s bobbing head and Collin’s sure steps down the beginning of the trail.
It looked like it was going to be a gorgeous day. The sky was bright blue, with wisps of clouds which poked out above the tops of the trees, and the sun wasn’t beating down yet. There was a hint of a breeze, and Max took a deep breath, appreciating all the smells of nature.
“This is a great outfit you’ve got here,” he called ahead to Collin, who looked over his shoulder with a proud smile.
“It’s a beautiful place. This is my last tour, though.”
“What?” Spencer cried. Off to their right, a pair of birds took flight, no doubt startled by Spencer’s voice.
“Yep. Packing it in. It’s time to move on to something new.”
“What could be better than this?” Max asked.
“Teaching,” Collin answered, but he didn’t sound like he was telling the truth. Not completely. “I miss teaching.”
“What did you teach?”
“I was a professor of Zoology back in England. Mind your step.” Collin stepped over a fallen tree branch. Spencer made a little hop to get over it, and landed like he was pretending to be a figure skater. Max would be surprised if Spencer made it out of the river unscathed. He hoped the rest of the trail was as easy as the first half mile.
“There’s a lot of bugs out here,” Spencer commented, swatting his hand in front of his face.
“It’s nature,” Max and Collin answered at the same time.
Spencer mumbled something under his breath and kept walking. Max kept his eyes on the ground, now wondering if they would make it to the river without Spencer’s brand new boots giving him blisters. Max hated feeling like such a judgmental prick, but every step he took further into this trip, the heavier his doubt and regret weighed on his shoulders.
“Why are you giving all this up?” he asked Collin.
“It’s...past its prime,” he answered. “Bit like me.”
“I’d argue both counts,” Max countered.
Collin hesitated, but didn’t reply to Max, choosing instead to say, “The trail gets a little steeper from here on, and there’s poison ivy to the left side of the trail. Be mindful of where you step. Also, look out for snakes.”
“Snakes?” Spencer screeched, and more birds flew away. Max chuckled, this kid was like wildlife repellent.
“Of course,” Collin deadpanned. “It’s nature.”
Chapter 4
Collin is in for a long night
Oh, bloody hell, what had he gotten himself into? It was like the universe was trying to either reward him or punish him for closing down the tours—and he couldn’t begin to figure out which one it was. He knew the two were going to be trouble the moment he set eyes on them, and not because he’d had years of men just like them sitting in his lectures.
Yes, he’d seen his fair share of Spencers—pretty, well-off, a little too oblivious for their own good, but well meaning. And the Maxes—brooding, attractive, and only peripherally aware of it. Max concerned him most of all. There was a pain in his eyes he wasn’t anticipating for someone who had booked a rafting tour with his boyfriend, and this was definitely not the place to find yourself, or whatever boys like him wanted to do when shit went awry. He’d half a mind to say that back at the start of the trail, but there was a determined set to Max’s jaw which told Collin he wasn’t going to get anywhere with him.
So, he’d put on his shades and braced himself for the inevitable flood of questions from Spencer. And he was not disappointed. Spencer also did not disappoint him in his absolute and utter fear of everything around them. Collin knew he was mostly talking rubbish about the snakes—yes they were there, but they’d long since avoided the well-used hiking path. But it brought him a little joy to watch him yelp and ballerina step around every stick and fallen log. And it wasn’t because he had a nice ass. It absolutely and completely, utterly, wasn’t.
“How much farther?” Spencer asked.
Collin fought the urge to roll his eyes as he brought up his watch, but before he could answer, Max scoffed. “What are you, four? We’ve been on the trail like ten minutes.”
“Try ten hours,” Spencer retorted. He turned desperate eyes on Collin. “Please tell me it’s been longer than ten minutes.”
Collin lifted a brow, keeping pace, though he let Spencer stew for another minute. “Thirty-two minutes, so you’re both wrong. We’re probably another two hours away, and then we can set up camp and have a rest.”
“Thank God,” Spencer breathed out, and Collin didn’t miss the way Max rolled his eyes.
In truth, he knew it was more than just annoyance. Yes, Spencer was fussy, and pretty. His boots looked like they were wearing blisters into his feet more than protecting him, and Collin would bet every quid he had in savings that his equipment was fresh from the packaging. But there was a sweetness to his innocence, a purity to it that made him want to cup his hands around it and protect him.
People like himself, people like Max with the way his shoulders hunched and his eyes were dark-rimmed like he hadn’t slept in days, they hadn’t tasted anything sweeter than the bitterness of life in far too long. He didn’t know Max’s story, but he knew it would be an easy bet to assume he’d known struggle and heartache. And he’d also be willing to bet that for all that Spencer annoyed Max, he also felt that same draw.
It was why Max picked on him, pulling pigtails in the schoolyard.
Collin appreciated that they both kept up, even when he could feel Spencer starting to flag, and he didn’t miss the sigh of relief when Collin navigated them into the clearing the tours almost always used as a camping site. The ground was mostly clear from the last tour Michael had taken, and the fire pit was blackened with fresh ash.
“We should get our tents set up. Pick a spot between trees so if it rains, you can brace your tarp over the top.” Co
llin let his pack slide down to the ground, and he rolled his shoulders backward. His bones ached with age, with overuse these past few years. He wasn’t quite ready to be put out to pasture, but he was starting to feel like it, and being around two fit men like Max and Spencer didn’t make him feel any better.
“Are we going to have a fire?” Spencer asked, cutting into Collin’s thoughts.
He turned and saw Spencer pulling down the zip on his pack. “Reckon we will. I don’t think the pit’s too wet from the rain, and if we want to cook dinner, we’ll need one.”
Spencer’s nose wrinkled. “We’re not, like...going to hunt for it, right?”
Max scoffed as he unraveled a small, one-man pup-tent and shook it open. “Fresh game too gross for his majesty?”
Spencer scowled. “I just don’t like killing things.” He dropped to his knees, and Collin tried his best not to notice how fluid the motion was, how good he looked that way. Christ, he was a pervert. “I’m not like a vegetarian or anything, but I don’t know. I don’t think I’d want to see my food with a face on it.”
“We’re not killing anything,” Collin said tiredly. He pulled the rations out of his pack--tinned meats, beans, some squashed bread. He had a small sachet of coffee for morning, some powdered creamer, sugar. The kettle and extra water would be lighter by sunrise, and he appreciated it. “Nothing here’s five stars, but it’ll keep us full until tomorrow.”
Spencer gave him a dubious look, but he carried on digging into his pack. Like Max, he had a ready-set tent, but along with it, a rolled tight air mattress and a pump. He laid it out on the ground, holding the pump in his hands, his nose wrinkled.
Collin felt his absurd urge to take the younger man in his arms and press a kiss in the center of that wrinkle war with the one that wanted him to shake the man and ask him how he’d managed to be so naive for this long. A bloody air mattress?
“You’ve got to be fucking kidding me.” Max’s voice cut through the quiet, and his boots crunched through pine needles as he crossed the distance between his tent and Spencer’s. “Is that an air mattress?”
Spencer’s cheeks pinked and he bit the inside of it, making one side hollow before he let go. “Uh? Yes?”
“His highness is too delicate to sleep on the ground like the rest of the peasants?”
“Max,” Collin sighed out, but neither he nor Spencer looked over.
“Not that it’s any of your business,” Spencer said, “but I wasn’t sure what the ground was going to be like. And what’s it to you, anyway? Why do you care?”
“I don’t,” Max said.
Lie, Collin’s mind supplied. “Let’s just get the camp sorted, shall we? We have a few hours of daylight left, and morning will be here before you know it.” Collin turned away, setting up his own, worn tent with permanently bent poles and divots in the canvas. It was weird to think about it again--how this would be his last. How he’d never have strangers with him in the middle of the wood ever again. Melancholy set deep in his bones, and he let himself get lost in the quiet whir of Spencer’s air pump as he unrolled his sleeping bag and laid it on the floor.
It smelled musty and old—it smelled like his childhood and a life that was meant to be his, but he never quite made it there. It was going to be a long night with those two, and he needed to conserve his strength to manage it.
“We can do a quick check round the area for firewood,” Collin said once he’d turned away from his set-up. Both men were sorted at this point, and apart from the mattress, Spencer’s tent looked just as common as the others. The only thing out of place was the man himself, who looked half-dead on his feet from the short hike.
“Cool. Can we do s’mores after?” Spencer asked.
Max blinked at him. “Are you twelve?”
“Oh, fuck you, dude. What’s camping without s’mores? Do you have to be such a killjoy all the time?” Spencer demanded. “It’s no wonder whoever you were with ditched you. You’re a fucking nightmare.”
Max’s cheeks paled, and Collin knew Spencer had hit a nerve. But before either of them could say anything else, Max threw his sleeping bag to the ground and gave a firm nod. “Cool. Whatever. I’ll go look for firewood.” He turned on his heel and stormed into the brush, and after a minute, Collin couldn’t hear his footsteps.
“Sorry,” Spencer said. “I didn’t mean to…”
“It’s fine,” Collin interrupted.
Spencer shook his head. “I should go find him and apologize.”
Before he could rush off, Collin caught him by the sleeve and hauled him back. “Just let him be.”
He knew now that more than guiding these two through the woods, his real task was going to be to keep them from killing each other before they got to the end.
Chapter 5
Spencer gets his s'mores
Spencer immediately regretted being an asshole to Max. He didn’t know what was wrong with him. He stared down at the air mattress and disconnected the pump now that it was fully inflated.
Maybe this trip had been a stupid idea. Spencer sighed and resisted the urge to crawl into his tent and go to sleep. That would only make him look like an even bigger baby, and an even bigger asshole than he already looked.
Collin had the patience of a saint to put up with Spencer. He realized he was a lot, but he couldn’t help it. And after years of twisting himself into knots to fit in with people, but failing and being ridiculed, Spencer refused to be anyone but himself. Although… sometimes he was a bit much.
He knew grown men shouldn’t fear things like snakes, or spiders, or anything. They should be like Collin and Max. Confident. Self-assured. Not afraid of tree roots and random shadows on a harmless hiking trail. But they hadn’t made fun of him for it. They didn’t say stupid and insulting things like man up, or grow a pair the way his friends always did.
Spencer sat in his tent and pulled his boots off. His feet ached, but he didn’t want to complain. Max already thought he was a whiny baby. With that thought, Spencer stuffed his feet back into his boots with a grimace and climbed out of the tent.
He’d never been camping and the closest he came to sleeping outside was sleeping with his bedroom window open. But he wasn’t totally useless and, while he had no desire to go foraging for firewood, he could at least gather some dry tinder to help start the fire. He gathered dry grass and any other dry material that looked flammable and piled it next to the fire.
Out in the open, alone, he felt exposed, like anything could come up behind him and eat him. Collin and Max would return to find his corpse, or maybe just a blood splatter and a bear using his femur as a toothpick.
Spencer shuddered and wrapped his arms around himself. The worst part of being afraid was that he could feel his rapid pulse in each and every blister on his feet. Going barefoot sounded appealing for a minute, until he remembered the snakes.
He continued hugging himself and observed the scenery. It was a beautiful place, all open meadow and blue sky dotted with clouds. The leaves fluttered in a gentle wind and more mosquitos than Spencer knew what to do with swarmed him.
He swatted one away from his arm, and another from his leg, and another from his neck.
“I thought you bathed in bug spray?”
“Shit!” Spencer shrieked at the sound of Max’s voice and spun around. Max looked at him with more disdain than amusement and Spencer bristled. “It doesn’t appear to be working.”
“You probably just made yourself taste good. Better you than me.” Max dropped a stack of sticks next to the fire pit. Spotting the pile of dried grass, he looked at Spencer. “What’s that?”
“Fire starter.”
Max’s lip quirked into a half smile. “Been camping before?”
“No.” Spencer rolled his eyes. “But I’m not completely stupid.” He bit back the part about seeing it in a movie.
Collin, thankfully, returned at that moment and dropped an even larger pile of wood next to Max’s. Of course, his brain chose to jump
into the gutter with both feet, and because he sometimes really was a twelve year-old boy at heart. He looked at Max and grinned.
“Looks like Collin’s wood is bigger than yours.”
Collin choked on a laugh and Max glared up at Spencer.
“What are you, four?”
“Four year-olds don’t make dick jokes.”
Max looked him up and down. “Speaking of dick jokes.”
“Max,” Collin admonished like a tired babysitter.
“Sorry.”
Max didn’t look sorry, though. He didn’t sound sorry, either. He sounded tired and bitchy. Spencer tried not to take the jab personally. He did have it coming after the shitty comment he tossed out earlier, but he was also tired and bitchy.
Collin caught Spencer’s gaze and gave him a look that half-warned, half-begged Spencer to stop.
“When’s dinner? The sooner I eat, the sooner I can sleep. I’m so fucking tired.”
Max ignored Spencer and worked on starting the fire. Spencer’s face heated as he remembered that Collin and Max had gone out to find wood and he’d gathered a little bit of grass. He suddenly felt like Baby, I carried a watermelon, Houseman.
“It won’t take too long,” Collin promised.
Spencer lowered himself and sat on a stump near where the firewood was just starting to catch. There were several natural wood benches arranged around the fire pit and Spencer had chosen the one furthest away from Max. The heat pouring off the growing fire felt like a dream as it soaked into the aching muscles on his legs.
“How far is it from here to the river?” Spencer thought of his poor, throbbing feet, and he hoped it wasn’t much of a hike.
He didn’t miss the way Max rolled his eyes, but he appreciated that he kept his comment to himself.
“It’s nothing you can’t manage,” Collin promised. “Just a couple miles, and it’s mostly flat.”
Max scoffed, but Spencer ignored him. Maybe he wasn’t that hungry. He thought about crawling into his tent and ignoring Max for the rest of the trip, but that would only make him seem more childish.