by Georgie Lee
Their honesty with each other dissolved the tension between them.
‘While we were apart it seems we were mistaken about each other’s intentions,’ he said.
For all the many times he’d been the one to search her out, she was the one approaching him now. In her eyes was the same hesitant anticipation which had been there when he’d first kissed her in Hertfordshire.
‘I think we still are.’
Her fingers, clasping the book in front of her, were close to his. If he reached out, he could touch her, but he didn’t move.
‘Are we?’
‘Yes.’
She curled one finger around his and his pessimism about her place in his life faded, along with every reason he’d concocted for trying to forget her. It was as impossible as leaving his men’s families to starve. She’d been a tranquil retreat in the midst of the chaos of his worries and family concerns, a unique woman among the many he’d met since returning home. He should have fought against her excuses, remained stubbornly beside her and told anyone who challenged them to go to Hades.
He could do that now. And it was clear in her azure eyes that she wanted him to.
He opened his mouth, ready to speak to all the questions and uncertainties passing between them, when a man’s voice shattered the moment.
‘Joanna, is this man bothering you?’ Lord Helmsworth bore down on them like a constable did a pickpocket while Lord Jarsdel remained politely at the opening to the aisle.
‘No, not at all.’ Despite his ominous approach, Joanna didn’t shrink away or stutter in her response as she held up the book. ‘Major Preston retrieved this book about Huria for me. He was quite helpful on the matter in Hertfordshire.’
‘Yes, I’m sure he was.’ Lord Helmsworth eyed Luke with enough suspicion to tell him he’d heard something about the dust-up concerning Luke and Joanna and the storm.
Joanna noted it, too, for she lowered the tome, more reserve coming over her than at his hasty approach, but she didn’t cower in silence. ‘He’s campaigning on behalf of soldiers now, trying to ensure their families are provided for while their men are missing in Spain.’
‘Are you?’ Lord Helmsworth eyed Luke as if he was about to snatch his watch and dart out the door.
‘I’m working to secure their pay for their families if they’re still alive and their pensions if they’re not.’ Luke paused, refusing to imagine them lying forgotten in some field. He had to believe they’d survived. ‘The treatment of our veterans who’ve given so much for their country is deplorable.’
‘I agree, and something should be done to help them.’ Her grandfather rubbed his chin. Luke and Joanna exchanged surprised glances at his having agreed with Luke. ‘I’m glad someone is fighting for their due, even if it is you.’
Luke kept his expression passive. The man was stubborn in his dislike, except this time Luke was to blame. Luke’s behaviour in Hertfordshire had convinced the Marquis that he wasn’t worthy of honourable company, or Joanna.
‘Lord Jarsdel, would you please escort Miss Radcliff to the carriage?’ her grandfather asked.
‘It would be my pleasure.’
Luke’s irritation flared as the earl offered Joanna his elbow. He eyed her, silently challenging her to stand with him and refuse, but she didn’t.
‘Good day, Major Preston.’ She walked with Lord Jarsdel to the door, but when the earl stepped forward to open it, she turned and threw Luke one last look. He caught it, and the conflict between wanting to stay with Luke and obedience to her grandfather. Lord Helmsworth noticed it, too, before she hurried outside.
‘You might fool an innocent girl, but you won’t fool a man of my experience,’ Lord Helmsworth warned in a low voice. ‘I’ve dealt with a poor military man in search of an easy life with a rich wife before.’
‘I’m not trying to fool anyone.’ If Lord Helmsworth were a younger man, Luke would strike him for the insult and call him out, but he’d been raised to respect his elders, even when they didn’t extend him the same courtesy. ‘I have a great regard for your granddaughter, one I developed long before her situation changed.’
‘And how convenient for you it has. Now you can hold your head up when you try to seduce her instead of sneaking around.’ He slapped Luke on the chest with the back of his hand. ‘Chase after all the heiresses in London if you want, but you will not wed Joanna.’
Lord Helmsworth strolled past Luke and out the door, twirling his walking stick as he went.
Luke watched through the large front windows as the Marquis climbed into the curricle where Joanna and Lord Jarsdel sat together. Lord Helmsworth smiled too widely at the couple as the driver took up the reins and snapped the horses into motion.
Determination rose up in Luke as the vehicle melted into the London traffic. Alma was right. There was more to affection than money or titles, and no obstacle Luke couldn’t overcome. In the faint sweep of Joanna’s finger against his, and in her potent look from across the library, she’d made it clear she still wanted him as much as he did her.
He wouldn’t secure her hand at the expense of her relationship with the only family she had. Winning her and her grandfather’s approval would take more tact and subtle manoeuvring than he was accustomed to. But Luke possessed the strength for battle. Hopefully Joanna did, too.
* * *
Joanna sat in the window seat of her grandfather’s Grosvenor Square town house, the book on Huria resting on her lap. She tried to read about its history, but she couldn’t picture the palaces and villages it described. She could only see Luke, standing in front of her in Hookham’s. She could feel his finger intertwined with hers and hear his words echoing in the quiet.
I’ve always been concerned about you. I still am.
She’d spent the last month resigned to letting him go, but their brief time together today had changed everything. She’d invited him back to her, and with his firm touch he’d answered her call. This—his explanation for staying away and the softness of his touch—had rekindled the possibility of her being with him once more.
Unease undermined her elation and she struggled to sit still on the bench. Luke’s warning not to surrender what she wanted to others had resonated deep inside her. However, speaking up had never been her strength, not at school, in Hertfordshire or here. She hadn’t even been able to tell Luke of her agreement to entertain Lord Jarsdel’s interest. It would have meant admitting he had been right about her inability to govern her own life.
There was also her grandfather to consider. With everything still so new between them she was hesitant to begin demanding her way. After all, her small attempt to make her grandfather see Luke in a different light by telling him about Luke’s good works hadn’t accomplished anything. She could well imagine how her insisting he see Luke as a rival to Lord Jarsdel would only further harden him against Luke, and possibly her.
‘Jane loved to read, it’s why there are so many novels in the library, though I’m afraid they’re a little out of fashion,’ her grandfather announced as he strolled into the room.
‘It doesn’t matter, they’re all new to me.’ She slipped the ribbon in the book on Huria and set it beside her. It was a potent reminder of Luke and everything she stood to lose if she didn’t learn to ask for what she wanted, but so was her grandfather smiling down at her.
‘This house was going to be hers when she married. It belonged to her mother’s family and came with her when we wed.’ His gaze slid to the portrait of her mother as a young girl cradling a small, black-and-white spaniel. It hung near the door across the room, opposite the painting of Joanna’s grandmother in her wide hoops and powdered hair. A winsome look dulled his expression before he turned back to her. ‘It’ll be yours when you marry.’
‘No. You’ve already been so good to me, I can’t take more.’
He
settled down on the window seat beside her, wrinkling the brocade pillows propped against the wall. ‘I want you to have it and everything that isn’t entitled to the estate to make sure you’re secure, no matter what happens to me.’
‘I don’t know what to say.’ She’d worried so much about her future at Huntford Place. Now, she’d never have to worry about it again, except where Luke’s place in it was concerned.
Her grandfather sat back, serious in his regard of her. ‘My gift makes you quite the wealthy heiress and a very eligible young lady. It means you must be on guard. You don’t want to fall prey to a fortune hunter like your mother did.’
Joanna clasped the locket and ran it back and forth along its gold chain, sensing where the conversation was leading. ‘I’ll be cautious.’
‘I’m sure you will be and I’ll do my best to guide you through this Season, as I should have done with your mother. I could ask my sister, but a spirited girl like you doesn’t want some old bat hovering around and she was too careless with your mother for me to trust her again.’ He sneered in displeasure before he settled himself. ‘It also means you must not speak with Major Preston again. Army men know how to wheedle their way into a lady’s affection.’
Her heart thundered in her chest. She appreciated his looking after her, but not his dictating with whom she could and couldn’t consort. If she intended to stand up for what she wanted, then now was the time to begin.
Taking a deep breath, she steeled herself against her fears and with a trembling voice she spoke. ‘You’ve asked a great many things of me and I’ve happily done them all, but I can’t do this. Whatever you may think of Major Preston, he’s my friend. He was kind to me at Huntford Place and protected me when my employers would have done me ill.’
He cocked his head, the gesture as close as he’d ever come to chastising her. ‘I understand he was a touch too kind to you.’
Joanna’s hand stilled the locket on its chain. He had heard the stories of her and Luke and suspected the worst. Fear made her shiver, despite the blazing fire in the grate, and all desire to challenge her grandfather vanished. ‘I’m sorry.’
‘There’s nothing to be sorry about. You aren’t experienced enough with gentlemen to realise the lengths they’ll go to in order to get what they want. I’m sure Major Preston promised to defy his family and society in order to win your trust, all the while keeping things between you a secret. Then, when it became known, where was he? Not beside you defending you against the Huntfords, but protecting himself.’
‘I was the one who left him at the vicarage after I refused his offer of marriage,’ she whispered, admitting two sins at once.
‘At least he had enough honour to make an offer,’ he grudgingly conceded. ‘But if he really loved you, he would’ve followed you and refused to take no for an answer. Instead, he stayed where he was and left you to your fate.’
‘It wasn’t like that at all.’
‘Are you sure?’ her grandfather pressed.
No, she wasn’t. At the vicarage, Luke had been adamant he could overcome any obstacles to them marrying, but as soon as she’d refused him, he’d dismissed her as fast as Lieutenant Foreman had left Frances. He hadn’t tried to visit her at Helmsworth Manor or contrived any other meeting between them. He’d said it was because he thought she didn’t want him, and she’d believed him until this moment.
‘I imagine you’re far more appealing to him now that your situation has changed,’ her grandfather pointed out, further increasing her doubts.
My situation. She rubbed the locket with her thumb. Luke had spoken of his family seeing the advantage in her new position. Perhaps they were the ones who’d changed Luke’s mind and that was why he’d been so friendly in the library. Maybe they were encouraging him to use his connection with her to press their case about the river land. Luke was dedicated to his family and he’d do almost anything to help them, including woo her.
No, Luke wouldn’t be so deceitful.
Joanna pinched the bridge of her nose, trying to sort out her warring feelings. Everything she’d heard today from Luke and her grandfather swirled in her mind until she couldn’t decipher what was the truth and what wasn’t. Her exchange with Luke in Hookham’s spoke to her heart. What her grandfather said added to all the warnings from Miss Fanworth and the other teachers about gentlemen and minding herself in their presence. She hadn’t minded herself today.
‘I’m sorry if I upset you.’ Her grandfather patted her hands, as loving now as he’d been through the last month. She turned her hand over in his and clasped it tight, grateful for his unfailing faith in the face of her weakness. It soothed her worries of being separated from him, but it didn’t settle her confusion about Luke. ‘What happened between you and Major Preston no longer matters and, as long as you don’t see him again, we’ll never speak of it.’
She didn’t agree to his demand, but she didn’t reject it either. Her grandfather had proved patient with her and she didn’t wish to test the limits of his acceptance, especially with so much between her and Luke still unsure. As much as she cringed at having everything dictated by her grandfather or anyone else, she balked at leaving it to Luke’s changing whims or her own. She’d be practical and realistic and decide nothing today. Instead, she’d wait for their next meeting and press him enough to discover the truth of his heart and hers.
* * *
‘Can’t you see the importance of making sure my men’s families aren’t left to suffer?’ Luke paced in front of Lord Beckwith’s desk, exasperated by this continued foot dragging. He’d spoken to half the superior officers in the Horse Guards and quite a number in the War Office. Each one had promised to help him, then foisted him off on another who’d done the same. Luke had got nowhere in securing funds for Reginald’s sister, or his men’s families. Despite the government’s stalling, he wasn’t about to give up.
‘I can, but it isn’t up to me.’ Lord Beckwith twirled his pen between his fingers. He’d been sympathetic and helpful in his assistance, but all too willing to stop when he faced any resistance. ‘Regulations state the soldiers must be dead before their families can receive a pension.’
‘Then make sure they receive their pay.’
He tossed his pen on the desk. ‘They can’t be paid if they’re missing and not confirmed dead’
Luke dug his fists into his hips and stared down at Lord Beckwith, fighting to remain calm. It seemed it wasn’t just Edward who could rouse his emotion, but the dithering of the Army Pay Board. ‘This isn’t acceptable and it has to change.’
‘Lieutenant General Calvert is already working to implement many changes, including treatment of our wounded.’
‘It isn’t enough.’
‘The government is a monolith which cannot be easily moved, if at all.’ Lord Beckwith leaned back in his chair and laced his fingers over his wide torso. He was sturdy like an ox, with a square chin with a divot set in the centre and the first hints of fat creeping in beneath the line of it. He’d been out of the field and in Whitehall too long. ‘What we need are more men like you.’
‘To do what? Rail at the lords who refuse to take action?’ It wouldn’t win him any allies any more than railing against Lord Helmsworth would win him over. He hadn’t seen Joanna since Hookham’s two days ago. He’d visited Lord Helmsworth’s twice, but had been told both times they were not at home, and his few notes to the Marquis and her had gone unanswered. More than likely, Lord Helmsworth had stopped them from reaching her and no society events had brought them together, further frustrating Luke’s attempts to see her. He was trying to be patient and smart in his pursuit but if it didn’t produce results soon, he’d change his tactics.
‘They’ll listen to you before they do other soldiers.’ Luke levelled a disbelieving look at Lord Beckwith who held up his hand, motioning for him to hear him out. ‘You may not be the earl,
but you come from their class, you speak their language, as well as the enlisted man’s. We need someone like you who can attest to what conditions are really like and why they must be changed. I could find a commission for you and a position within the Army here in London.’
Luke stared at the sword lying across the top of the mahogany desk, Lord Beckwith’s gold regimental insignia engraved on the lancet. Luke hated the wrangling of politics as much as he did the rules of society, but Lord Beckwith’s suggestion intrigued him. This was the first time anyone had suggested Luke use his status as an earl’s son for more than securing a loan to purchase a higher rank. He’d have to do it again to obtain enough money to pay for a commission. If he did, he could make a difference while he was stuck here in England, but it would take months or years and his soldiers’ families needed help now.
‘I’ll think about it, but at the moment I have the more pressing matter of my men’s pay. Who else can I speak with?’
‘Lord Craven didn’t return for the little Season and Lord Farley is too entrenched in his ways to see reason.’ Lord Beckwith held up five fingers and lowered them as he ticked off men until one remained. ‘You haven’t spoken to Lord Jarsdel yet. If you can make progress with anyone, it’s him. He’s the most reasonable of the lot and very sympathetic to the plight of enlisted men. He’s well acquainted with the Duke of York, too. Appealing directly to the Duke through him could be your best chance of getting what you want.’
Luke bit back a groan of frustration. Lord Jarsdel was the last man Luke wanted to speak with, but the answers he’d received to his enquiries into his men’s families, especially Reginald’s sister, weren’t good. They were struggling. If it was in Luke’s power to give them money, he would, but with the funds he’d secured by selling his major’s commission tied up in Pensum Manor, there was little to be spared. Time was also working against him. When the special session of Parliament ended, the lords would exit town as fast as they’d returned, making it difficult to rouse them to do anything before the next session opened in the spring. He wasn’t sure Miss Crowther or the other families could make it through the winter without assistance. Luke must swallow down his reluctance and speak with Lord Jarsdel.