by Delisa Lynn
“Evie, you have company.”
“Oh, okay. I’ll be out in a few minutes.”
“If you’re not ready for visitors, I can ask them to come back later.”
“It’s okay. Give me a few minutes to freshen up,” I called out through the door.
“Do you need help?”
“No, Mom, I can get up on my own.”
I rubbed my eyes and roll out of bed, hobbling to my bathroom, and I reached for the light switch, turning it on. The mirror over the sink reflected a person unknown to me, a broken woman that was lost. I closed my eyes and rinsed my face off with cold water, hoping to pull my mind from what I saw in the mirror.
The walk out to the living room was a struggle, and I wish I had told my mom I wasn’t ready for company. My leg was stiff and it didn’t want to work, and it made me second-guess walking without a cane. As I entered the space, I tripped over a rug, and my dad quickly caught me before I did a nosedive into the floor.
Embarrassment flamed in my cheeks as I felt them heat up.
“Are you okay, Eves?” Worry etched my father’s face.
“Yes, my leg didn’t want to work,” I murmured.
“Positive,” he asked, worry still lingered on his face.
“Yes, Dad. You can let go of me. I’m all right.” He released me and I hobbled over to the couch.
“Evelynn, are you sure you’re okay,” my grandma Doris asks.
“Yes, Nana, I’m okay.”
“Good, I need to hug you to make sure.”
She got out of the lady chair, walking over to sit next to me on the couch, and pulled me into her. The familiar scent of comfort embraced me, and I’m glad that I didn’t turn away my visitors. I knew a hug from Grandpa Wayne would be next, and I’ve never been so relieved to be home. Their hugs made me feel…safe.
***
Sleep was a curse and a blessing in one. I was exhausted because I wasn’t sleeping much, and sleep only came when I was beyond exhaustion. The only time the voices were quiet. I tried to sleep as much as I could. Three days a week, I had physical therapy with Cheryl, and she was the only communication I had with the outside world. Her coming to the house was a blessing. I don’t think I could go into town yet.
Family and friends would stop in to see me, but they asked questions I didn’t want to answer or know how to answer. Once the newest of me being home wore off, they stopped coming around, which was fine with me. Being around people was awkward because they didn’t know what to say…or felt uncomfortable because I wasn’t the same person they used to know.
I was in the living room after therapy and that’s when my mom cornered me. I had nowhere to go, and she knew she I was cornered.
“How did therapy go?”
“It went okay. I’m starting to get stronger in my right leg.”
“That’s good to hear. How are you holding up?” Mom looked at me, and she looks tired and older than she normally did.
“I’m fine, Mom,” I bit out.
“Are you sure you don’t need to talk or anything?” She bit her lip, trying to keep her emotions at bay.
“I don’t need to talk,” I told my mom for the hundredth time since I’ve been home.
“I know, Evie, that’s what you’ve been telling us since you arrived almost a month ago. You barely talk to your physical therapist or us. What I’m saying is there are people trained to help you so you don’t have to fight this alone,” she stated as she sat across from me on the couch.
“I know. I appreciate that you think that way, but going it alone would be better. That way I don’t too attached to something only to be disappointed it got tired or more, leaves, or as my luck has it, dies,” I bluntly stated.
“Evie!” Horror painted her face as it turned ashen.
“Well, Mom, it’s true. Brian left me when I joined the Army. The two people I was close to died, and the only guy I semi had feelings for died that day too… I’m cursed and scared. What guy would want me? I’m a mess, emotionally and physically.”
“Evelynn, that’s enough. I know we are supposed be gentle with you, and we do try to be. We love you and thank God you’re alive every day, but you need to talk to someone…anyone. Grace put a list with phone numbers of therapists here in town. I’ll find it for you, please talk to someone if you don’t want to talk to us. I thought I lost you that day and I’ll be damned if I lose you to your thoughts.”
“I’m fine,” I gritted out.
“No, you’re not. You need to talk to someone understand your feelings, your emotions.”
“Ha, ha. No one can help me what.” I shook my head as I pictured myself lying on a couch in a shrink’s office.
“If you think that way, then that’s how it will be,” she murmured as she got up and left the room.
I nodded my head because I didn’t know what else I could say to her. Maybe she was right; maybe I did need to talk to someone.
My mother returned shortly and had a paper in her hand.
“Do you want me to call?”
“Yes, see who can get me in first.”
“Okay. I’ll go to the office to make the calls.”
“Thank you, Mom. Even though I don’t say it enough, thank you.”
“Anything for you, darling. I’ll be right back.” She rushed out of the room before I could change my mind about the appointment.
I laid my head back against the back of the chair and closed my eyes. Moments or minutes went by and I heard someone coming toward me, and I opened my eyes to see who was coming into the room.
“Evie? I called and got you an appointment for now. I’ll drive you.”
“Seriously?” How did she get me in so quickly?
“Yes, it’s in town with Dr. Judd. He was number two on the list and said to get there when we could.”
“Okay.” I put down the footrest on the recliner I was in and got up. My body ached from the therapy, but I was much stronger than I was a month ago.
“Dad’s truck okay or do we need to take my car?”
“The truck is fine.”
“Good, it’s in the garage. Let me tell Dad where we’re going and I’ll meet you there.”
“Sounds good.” I made my way out to the garage and try to hop up on the seat like I used to, but that’s not what happened. I caught myself as my ass almost landed hard on the concrete floor of the garage. I used the step and pulled myself back up to standing, then used it to hoist myself up into the cab. Another thing I couldn’t do like I used to be able to.
The “used to”s were starting to add up. Was it worth living?
ABOUT THE AUTHOR
A. Gorman was born and raised in a small community in Central Indiana. She left the slow moving life of the country for the fast-paced city life. After spending twelve years in the city and becoming a mother to two wild and crazy kids, she chose to move back to the peace and quiet of the country after marrying the man of her dreams and gaining three more children.
As an avid reader, A. never set out to be an author since she’s a full-time editor for several incredible authors. However, after editing one day, a voice started talking to her and talking and talking. She decided to sit down and write what she had to say, and it turned out she had a lot to say. Then that one voice turned to two, and another story came to life. Not believing that anything she was writing was publishable, she asked a few friends to critique her manuscript…and now she’s the proud author of the Their Sins series, with several more series and standalones planned.
When she’s not corralling their five kids and two dogs or out in their garden, you can find her at her desk editing or writing her next novel with a cup of coffee and classical music cranked up on her iPad. While she loves reading, A. is addicted to all things British, coffee, and gummy bears—in no particular order.
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Publisher: Limitless Publishing
Table of Contents
Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Chapter 3
Chapter 4
Chapter 5
Chapter 6
Chapter 7
Chapter 8
Chapter 9
Chapter 10