by Linda Wells
“MISS BINGLEY!!”
Darcy spun around and stared in disbelief at the voyeur. Caroline screamed, and with her hand to her mouth ran from the room. Darcy turned back to Elizabeth. “Was she watching us?!” Infuriated, he got up and stormed into the dressing room, pulling on his breeches and a shirt.
“Where are you going?” Elizabeth asked, rushing to pull on her nightdress and robe.
“To see Bingley. Either she goes or we do.” He pulled on his boots and stepped into the empty hallway.
He proceeded to Bingley’s door and pounded on it with his fist. The door soon opened and a half-dressed and confused Master of the house came to face the enraged countenance of his guest. “Darcy! What is wrong?”
Darcy pushed him into the room and slammed the door behind him. He told the horrified Bingley precisely what was wrong. “If it had been a man, Bingley, I would be within my rights to call him out! As it is, I demand that either your sister be sent away from here at first light, or Elizabeth and I will stay at the Meryton Inn or Longbourn until you are wed. I have tolerated your sister’s behaviour for years, but this is the limit of my endurance. How she could have ever imagined that I would marry her is beyond me, and now with this latest display, I doubt that she would be acceptable by any honourable man!”
Bingley, a look of deep disgust on his usually buoyant face wholeheartedly agreed. He had hoped that Caroline would accept Darcy’s marriage and finally seek out her own future elsewhere. That was not to be. He agreed with Darcy that she would be sent away to London in the morning and determined that he would send a letter to their relatives in Scarborough, asking them to take her in. She would get no further help from him, financially or physically. She would have to live on the interest of her dowry. It saddened him, but the break had to be made.
Darcy returned to his bedchamber to find Elizabeth absent. He noticed the breeze blowing the curtains, and looked out onto the balcony. There she stood, staring at the quiet garden. She looked up when he approached her, and held out her hand. He took and kissed it, then wrapped her in his embrace.
“What happened?” She asked.
“Bingley will send her away tomorrow.” He said, hugging her tightly.
“It seems that you were correct to be concerned. I was wondering if she would have done anything else besides simply watch us.” Elizabeth nestled her head on his chest.
“I do not even wish to think about it. Hopefully this is the final time that we will be under the same roof.” He kissed her head. “And, we will be sure to always lock the door when we retire from now on.” Elizabeth started to laugh softly. “What is so amusing, Lizzy?”
“I find myself jealous of her.” He leaned back, looking at her with confusion. “She has had a view of you that I never will.” Elizabeth smiled at him.
Finally understanding her he relaxed and smiling, whispered suggestively, “There is a mirror in your dressing room, my love.”
“WHAT IS ON YOUR MIND, DARCY?” Bingley asked. The two friends were out riding the next morning. Caroline had her trunks packed and was dispatched to London at sunrise, with strict instructions on her expected behaviour. Bingley had also written to an aunt in Scarborough, asking if she will take in her now homeless niece. By silent agreement, the two men decided not to speak of the mortifying incident again. Elizabeth took a carriage over to Longbourn just after breakfast and they would not meet again until dinner time that evening. Despite the news of Mr. Bennet’s dramatic change, Darcy was in no hurry to spend an extended visit with him. When Bingley suggested looking over the estate, he eagerly agreed. He also wanted to talk to his friend.
“My God, Darcy.” Bingley said, numbly. His open, always happy face was creased with lines of distress. He felt shock, anger, and watching his friend’s countenance, intense pain. “How are you faring? How is Elizabeth?”
Darcy hated talking about himself, his privacy was one of his most-guarded possessions, which made the experience with Caroline all the more infuriating, but he knew now, from sharing his past with Elizabeth, the relief that would come from talking about this particular event with Bingley. “We are better, I think. The nightmares for both of us are less frequent, and more easily stopped.” He sighed. “I am afraid that Elizabeth has yet to feel comfortable walking alone for long periods, but I do admit to not encouraging her, either. I imagine with time we will both regain our confidence.” He smiled grimly, “Perhaps she will put my nerves to the test while she is here in the familiar environment of Hertfordshire. I will not like it one bit, but knowing her, she will do it anyway.”
“I will have the port ready for you as you await her return, Darcy.” Bingley offered, regaining his humour a bit.
Darcy laughed softly. “Thank you, old friend.”
They rode further, looking over the fields, and seeing the first hint of green as the seeds began to sprout. “What do you plan to do?” Darcy regarded his friend seriously. “Do you wish to purchase Netherfield?”
“I have not made a decision yet.” He looked at Darcy, and then smiled crookedly. “My future in-laws have greatly enhanced their disposition of late.”
Darcy laughed. “Ah, so the prospect of living next to Mrs. Bennet has improved?”
“A bit.” He smiled. “My lease runs through Michaelmas. I may see if I can extend it to the New Year. At least then I would see what the hunting is like here in the autumn. It would also give me a feel for how invasive my relatives will be, and of course, I will be able to learn what Jane’s opinion is. Perhaps she would prefer to live closer to her sister, instead.” He looked to Darcy.
“Well, if you think about it, with the entailment, Jane’s family will not be in Longbourn for many years longer. Not that I am wishing an early demise for Mr. Bennet, but it is a consideration.” Darcy said, thoughtfully. “If you like, I will make inquiries about properties in the vicinity of Pemberley.”
“I would appreciate it.” They rode along silently for some time, enjoying the companionship. “Darcy?” Bingley said cautiously, breaking the silence. “How was your wedding night?”
Darcy sent him a punishing glare. “Surely you do not expect me to tell you that?”
“I mean . . . how did you . . . handle . . . you know . . . the first time for a lady . . . oh, I am putting this badly.” He was bright red.
Darcy was amused, but he was not going to tell Bingley that. “Yes, you are.”
“I have experience, but I have never been. . .”
“The first?”
“Yes.”
“I would say just be slow and gentle.” He looked at his frustrated friend, and decided to pity him. “Elizabeth and I laughed much of the way through it. It relaxed us quite considerably.” He smiled at him.
“Laughed? I never would have thought of that.” He looked hopeful. “That I can do!” He said, gaining confidence.
Darcy grinned. “Then have at it, Bingley!”
ELIZABETH LOOKED at the house where she had lived for nearly all of her years with mixed feelings. Jane’s effusions over the change in her parents were difficult to believe. She still harboured a great deal of disappointment over her father’s behaviour, but time and distance had helped, as had the strong, unending love and support of her husband. The carriage stopped and the moment that she descended, she was surrounded by women.
“Lizzy!” Lydia cried. “Oh, what a beautiful carriage! Do you think that Mr. Darcy would buy one for me and Mr. Denny? Did you bring me any presents? Will you take me to town to buy my wedding clothes?”
“NO! She is going to take me to town! Are you not, Lizzy? Lydia found her husband, and you and Jane have yours, it is my turn. You must take me there! It is still the Season! You can take me to balls and parties!”
“Girls, girls, leave your sister alone!” Mrs. Bennet walked up, far calmer than Elizabeth remembered her ever being. “Welcome home, Lizzy. My, this is a beautiful carriage, and this gown, is this one that your Aunt Gardiner purchased for you? She wrote to me about the tr
ousseau that Mr. Darcy asked her to purchase for you.”
Elizabeth ignored her two younger sisters and looked at her mother with undisguised astonishment. There was no fluttering handkerchief, or any call for smelling salts, just a simple, sincere, controlled excitement. It was astounding. She pulled herself together, and for the first time in years she found herself speaking to her mother like a sensible person. “Yes, Mama, this is one of the gowns that Aunt Gardiner purchased. I hope to select the rest of my new things soon, but will wait for my sister Georgiana to accompany me.”
“How nice. Will you see her soon?” Mrs. Bennet took her arm and walked her into the house. Jane was standing at the door, watching the scene with a broad smile.
Elizabeth sent her a look of amazement then addressed her mother. “We expect Colonel Fitzwilliam to escort her here tomorrow. We will be taking her back to Pemberley with us after the wedding.”
“We look forward to meeting her.” Mrs. Bennet smiled. “Now, I know that your father is very anxious to see you. Why do you not go and speak to him, then you may join the rest of us to work on the wedding decorations. We expect the Gardiners to arrive by noon. When may we expect your dear husband and Mr. Bingley?”
“They will be here for dinner, Mama.” She looked at Jane, who smiled at Charles’ name.
“Very good, now off you go.” Mrs. Bennet gave her a pat on the arm and gracefully departed to the kitchens.
“Jane, what has happened to her? Are you putting laudanum in her tea?” Elizabeth whispered hurriedly.
Jane laughed. “No, I think that she is the happy recipient of attention. It is extraordinary is it not?”
“I do not have words to describe it!” Elizabeth said, still amazed.
The sound of a door opening caught their attention. Mr. Bennet stepped out into the hallway. He stood looking at Elizabeth for a moment, then walked forward and without hesitation, wrapped his arms around her. “Lizzy.” Suddenly they both started to cry. Jane turned and shooed Lydia and Kitty away to give them privacy. They held each other tightly, sobbing out all of the pain. After some time, Mr. Bennet lifted his favourite daughter’s face from his shoulder, and looked into her eyes. “Come, let us sit down and talk.” She nodded, and they went into the library and closed the door.
Instead of taking his customary seat behind his desk, he led her to a small sofa by the window where they sat down. He kept his arm around her, and she kept her face buried in his shoulder, as she did when she was a little girl. He took a deep breath. “Are you well, Lizzy? Your letter about what happened was devastating. Thank God your outstanding husband Mr. Darcy was able to find you, and deal with that reprehensible man.”
At her father’s reference to Wickham, Elizabeth was suddenly struck by a memory of that day. She was awash with Wickham’s voice and the feel of his hot, rancid breath on her face. “Papa,” She said shakily, still hidden in his shoulder, “When he was . . .” She hesitated, she could not say aloud what she was able to write in her letter. “When he . . . was with me, he said some things, taunting me. I know that his claim of . . .of . . . hurting Lydia was false because I had just read her letter telling me of her experience, so when he said that you wrote to him to ask that he help you to separate me from William, I knew that was false as well.” She waited. Hearing nothing, she asked. “It was false, was it not, Papa?”
Mr. Bennet sat with his eyes closed, clutching his precious daughter to him, his face expressing the anguish of his twisting heart. His dreaded fear had come true, she knew his betrayal. He could not tell her the truth and lose her all over again. He could not. If Darcy learned the truth, he knew their separation would be forever. He was grateful she remained pressed to his shoulder so he could say, “Yes, Lizzy.”
“I knew it was a lie. Everything he said to William was a lie as well. He was seeking to cause as much pain as possible.” She concluded, relieved to know her father was not the cause of their terror.
Mr. Bennet felt his chest constrict with pain. The guilty knowledge of his actions would hang over him until the day he died. “Let us not speak of him anymore, Lizzy.” He kissed her head, and tried to keep the quaver from his voice. “Now tell me, are you well?”
“I am much better, Papa. I could not have recovered so well if it were not for William’s love for me. He is the best of men.” She sniffed. “I am glad to hear that you recognize how good he is now.”
Mr. Bennet closed his eyes. “I am ashamed, Lizzy, ashamed of myself for wanting to keep you from such a good husband; and ashamed of my behaviour and unpardonable words to Mr. Darcy. But most of all ashamed that my selfishness almost lost me the love of one of the dearest persons in my life, my daughter, Lizzy.” He kissed her forehead. “Can you forgive a very foolish man?”
She looked up into his pained face. “Yes, Papa, if you are willing to recognize your errors, I am willing to forgive them. You will have to speak to William as well, because I will not speak for him. He was very highly offended by your accusations. But he is a very good man, Papa. I love him dearly.”
“I will speak to him. I must, you see, thank him.” He looked at her. “Not only must I thank him for saving you, but I must also thank him for saving my marriage.”
“How did he do that? I could not help but see the incredible change in Mama, but what does William have to do with it?”
“The day that he asked for my consent, the day that he took you away from me forever, I threw some irrational, ridiculous, rash accusations at him, and he responded with anger and very pointed and correct statements. He asked me if I was afraid to live with my wife. I thought long and hard about that question. I decided that I never really gave my marriage a chance. When I did not have a son, I gave up entirely, and ignored your mother, and hid myself in this room, only to appear to make remarks on her silly behaviour which took away her confidence and only made her sillier. After I received your letter I saw how strong your relationship with your husband was. I realized what I had wasted. Instead of wishing to keep my favourite child near to me, I should have been concentrating on loving my wife. That day I vowed to begin again. As you can see, it has had a marked affect on your mother. I wish that I had done this years ago. How different my daughters might be today.”
“Oh, Papa!” Elizabeth hugged him tightly. “I have missed you so much! I am so happy that you have decided to stop hiding yourself away in this room. Thank you for giving all of your family a chance to know the wonderful man that only I have known for so long. I love you, Papa.”
“And I love you, Lizzy.” They sat and hugged for a long time, and then wiping his eyes, Mr. Bennet drew himself up. “I think that Jane will need you. You should go to her aid. Your mother is much improved, but she remains a very silly woman.”
Elizabeth laughed and rose. “I will endeavour to rescue my sister. Thank you, Papa.” She kissed his forehead and left.
When the door closed behind her, Mr. Bennet closed his eyes and sighed. He had harboured a deep fear that somehow she would find out that he had contacted Wickham, and he was shaken to the core to hear her speak of it. He could not regret lying of his involvement, not now, not when he was finally re-establishing contact with her, not when he had made such great progress with his wife, not now that he was truly a changed and he hoped, better man. He would never forgive himself, and he would never forget what his actions began. That would be his penance. He knew that his relationship with Elizabeth had changed forever, that she would never look at him the same way again, but he was grateful for the chance to try and regain some of the respect she once had for him. And he was grateful for the exceptional man she had married.
BY THE TIME Bingley and Darcy arrived at Longbourn for dinner, Elizabeth had reached the end of her rope. Her mother was most definitely improved, but her younger sisters were not. Lydia and Kitty fought continually over Jane’s wedding clothes, which she was trying very hard to pack. Mary had sequestered herself with the pianoforte, and that would not have been a bad thing if she had n
ot insisted on singing. Elizabeth, who at one time missed the noise of her busy family, suddenly discovered that she was longing for the peace of Pemberley. She secretly thanked heaven that Darcy had not met her family before they were married. He surely would have run away as quickly as his horse could carry him.
So, she did as she had from the age of eight. She grabbed her bonnet and left the house to walk. She did tell Jane that she was going; thankfully, because when Darcy arrived to find no Elizabeth anywhere to be found he was ready to mount a full search. Elizabeth had told the wide-eyed Jane the tale of Wickham privately that morning so she understood Darcy’s panic. She assured him that Elizabeth would be fine, and judging by the time, she should be home very soon. Bingley tried to appease him with the promised glass of port, and even Mr. Bennet came to offer his library to him, and distract him with a book. He declined all and instead remained outside of the house and paced.
Elizabeth could see him from the gate when she came into the garden near the house. She was struck by the intensely worried expression on his face, and felt absolutely terrible for it. She would have been back much sooner if she had not been waylaid by Mrs. Lucas. She approached him silently. He was striding back and forth, not even looking up anymore, the empty yard just made him panic more. Elizabeth positioned herself at the spot where he was making his turn, and waited for him to next arrive. He paced up and his downcast eyes spotted a gown. He stopped and looked up into the concerned eyes of his wife.
“Lizzy!” He grabbed her and held her tightly to him. “Please do not frighten me like this again!” Holding her allowed all of his suppressed fear to rise to the surface, and he expressed it in anger. Tightly grasping her shoulders, he pushed her away. His eyes burned into hers and he commanded, “You are never to go out walking alone again!”