Alex stood as well, fishing a keycard out of a pocket. “I had the front desk provide a second key this morning in the hopes you would accept my offer, so you can come and go as you please. Until we make other arrangements, or you manage to sort things out for yourself, I want you to consider this your home too.”
There were a few things he could have asked her to do for him, since he was meeting with a real estate agent that morning to begin the search for a new home, but he realized she was better off spending the day organizing her affairs. “If you need anything,” he took out a business card and handed it to her, along with the keycard, “just let me know and we can add it to your account.”
“Thank you again, I truly do appreciate everything.” When she reached out a hand to accept the keycard and his business card their fingers touched, for the briefest of moments, and she felt a spark leap between them. Surprised, and a little alarmed, by the spark, she hurriedly turned away and headed for the bedroom to retrieve her purse.
Before leaving the suite she wrote down her cell number on a piece of hotel stationary and gave it to Alex. She wasn’t entirely sure why she had done that, but rationalized it by telling herself that if she was going to be working for him, he might need to get hold of her.
She hadn’t had anything to eat since lunchtime the day before, but she was too keyed up to think about breakfast. She wanted to get things patched up with Janie, if she could, and her mind remained focused on that, rather than her empty stomach all the way from the suite to Janie’s condo.
Pulling into the parking lot outside of Janie’s condo building she wondered if there would ever come a day when she didn’t feel nervous about something. Since meeting Rhett her world had been turned upside down at every turn, and it didn’t seem like it would ever feel like a normal life again.
Her stomach tensed in nervous anticipation as she finally reached her friend’s door. She knocked and then waited; she could have used the key Janie had given her but it didn’t seem right.
The door had barely opened before she found herself being pulled into Janie’s arms, where she was held tight, her breathing almost cut off. “Can you ever forgive me for being such a bitch? I’m so sorry; if you want to be with Rhett then damn it, it’s not my place to tell you what to do with your life.” Janie spoke hurriedly, feeling like utter shit after their argument the day before.
Leah held her friend just as tight, needing to feel like she belonged somewhere just then; knowing that Janie didn’t hate her made the world seem a little brighter than it had before the door opened. Once the tears started, it was like there wasn’t a shut off valve, and she couldn’t stop them, all she could do was sob helplessly.
“Hey, everything is going to be just fine.” She knew their argument had been horrible, but for her friend's emotions to be so wrought because of it made her feel even guiltier than she already did.
“I’m not sure anything is ever going to be fine again.” Leah sniffed, trying to gain some control over her emotions. In two weeks her entire life hadn’t just been turned upside down, it had rolled over and over like a car in a Hollywood action movie. It wasn’t good for her; she didn’t just crave stability, she needed it.
“Of course it will, honey.” It was so unlike her friend to react in such a fashion, though she knew it had become almost normal since Leah had become involved with Rhett. It was clear that Rhett was a negative, possibly even a destructive, force in her life, but she kept her thoughts on that to herself.
After their argument she had spoken at length with David, and knew she had done more than simply step over the line of suitable behavior. By the time their conversation was over he had made her feel as if she had acted in as controlling a manner as Rhett had. It was a feeling she hated, and which had brought her up short and made her take a good hard look at her behavior.
“I left him, Janie.” She feared that her friend would gloat, and knew she couldn’t really blame her if she did, though she wasn’t sure she could deal with it if Janie did feel the need to, not when the wounds were so fresh.
“Um, wow.” Janie wanted to say thank god, but reminded herself that her friend didn’t need her to get involved in her relationship again. “Are you okay?” Her friend’s feelings, not her own personal satisfaction, were what mattered. She just hoped Leah had given Rhett a swift kick in the ass on her way out of the relationship, though once again she was careful not to voice that thought.
Knowing that they were never going to agree on anything to do with Rhett, Leah stepped back and wiped her eyes, sure that she looked like something out of a horror movie. “I’ll be fine, eventually. Hey, on a positive note, I got a job.” She forced herself to smile as she gave her friend the one piece of good news she had.
“That’s great, Leah, you’ll have to tell me all about it after we get you settled back in.” She was so excited to have her friend back, and couldn’t wait for things to get back to normal. The last few days had been horrible for her, and she could only imagine what they had been like for Leah.
“Well,” Leah paused, not sure how to explain her new situation, “I’ve kind of agreed to move in with Alex until I get back on my feet.” She could see the confusion in Janie’s eyes and it brought the first genuine smile to her lips for some time.
“Wait a minute, back up. Who is Alex? And what does he have to do with you leaving Rhett?” It was clear a lot had happened with her friend in the last couple of days and she moved over to the kitchen island, where she sat herself on a stool to wait for the story.
Joining her friend in the kitchen, Leah set her purse on the counter and settled herself on a stool. After a little prompting she began her story, starting with her evening in the dungeon and her meeting Rhett’s friend, Alex, and finishing with the agreement they had come to that morning. Her description of Alex, when Janie managed to drag it out of her, provoked a laugh and a sigh.
“Wow, just wow!” Janie shook her head as she laughed. “You have been one busy lady.” It sounded to her as though Leah found, Alex, Rhett’s friend and the new guy in her life, to be rather impressive. She also thought it sounded like Leah had the beginnings of an attraction to him. She realized, though, that it was best for her to keep that, and the notion that this Alex might be the one to get her away from the destructive force that Rhett was bringing into her life, to herself.
“Yeah, I start work officially on Monday, as an intern, but I’m also going to be working as Alex’s assistant, when we’re not at the office so I guess he could need me to start that before then. I have to admit, I’m really excited about this. I never thought I’d get a job like this one, the money is amazing and it’s a great opportunity to learn about the advertising business.” It was a huge relief to be able to talk with her best friend again. It also felt great to stop worrying and smile.
“Well, honey, you’ve always got a place to stay if things don’t work out, or it gets awkward, you living with this Alex. I’m really happy for you.” Janie refused to admit that she was disappointed her friend wasn’t going to be moving back in; it was apparent after their talk that Leah needed to find her own way and she was determined not to be a selfish person and stand in the way of that.
“As long as you don’t hate me, Janie, I think everything else will work out alright.” She meant that, just talking with her friend, and knowing everything was alright between them, made everything else seem must better and easier to cope with. “I’ll have to introduce you and David to Alex soon; I think you’ll both like him.”
The two of them talked for hours, spending the entire morning rebuilding their friendship, until David arrived at lunchtime. He took them both out to eat, treating them to an expensive lunch at an exclusive restaurant to celebrate the reunion, even though they had only been separated for a couple of days. After that Janie and Leah packed up her things and the three of them loaded the boxes into Leah’s and David’s cars for the trip to the hotel.
Alex was back at the hotel, after his morning
search for property, when they got there, and he and David hit it off immediately. The two of them enjoyed coffee and chatted, mostly about business and their different approaches to the lifestyle they enjoyed, while Leah and Janie unpacked what they could of the boxes. By the time they were finished the room Alex had given her in the suite seemed more like home than a room in a hotel.
The phone call from Rhett, which came as they were all sitting down making plans for dinner, caught Leah by surprise and she found herself struggling not to hyperventilate as she excused herself and headed into the bedroom to take the call. “Hello,” she answered the phone after closing the door and taking several deep breaths to calm herself. She did her best to keep her voice free of emotion, but wasn’t sure how successful she was.
“Leah, I know you’re angry with me and I’m sorry I allowed my temper to get the best of me.” Rhett spoke quickly before she could decide she really didn’t want to listen to what he had to say. “I’ll do anything to make it up to you. I know I have a problem with my temper but I promise you, it won’t happen again, I’m getting myself help, professional help, to deal with my temper.” He forced himself to remain aloof, afraid of the rejection he feared she would offer.
“That’s good, I’m glad you’ve admitted you have a problem and are willing to do something about it,” Leah told him. A part of her wanted to drive over and tell him all was forgiven, but her mind couldn't really take another incident like the last one. “I’m sorry, Rhett, but I think we moved into this entire thing too fast, we barely know each other and we already got engaged. I think the best thing we can do is take some to get to know one another, and then decide if we really want to be engaged.” It broke her heart to admit that, she knew it was the right thing to do though, they had only known each for a couple of weeks.
“You’re right, Leah, we should get to know each other better, and I need time to deal with my problems before I can be the person you deserve to be with.” He wanted to demand that she come back to him, right then, but he fought against it, knowing that it was his instincts and his urge to take control of everything he wanted that had gotten him into the mess he was in right then.
It didn’t make sense to him that his heart could belong to her so completely in such a short time, but he knew it did, and because of that he was prepared to go against his nature.
Leah was surprised that he wasn’t asking, or even demanding, that she come back to him, and the lack left her heartbroken. If he had asked, she would have been tempted, and might not have been able to resist, she knew that, so she was glad he hadn’t, but it still hurt that he hadn’t tried. “I’m glad you’re prepared to be reasonable about this.” She wanted to scream at him, to demand that he not sound so distant and uncaring, but she fought the urge, needing to preserve her dignity.
“I hope you know that I never meant to hurt, Leah, and I hope we can still be friends.” Fuck being friends, he thought to himself, he wanted her in his life and in his arm.
“Things happen.” My god, had she really just said that? She wanted to slap him, how could he not give a damn, she wondered. Her entire world was tilting again; the thought of him not loving her wasn’t even something she had considered.
“Yes they do, and I’ve allowed my emotions to overrule my common sense with you, but I promise, I am going to work on that.” He wanted to tell her it was agony not having her with him, but he’d be damned if he would hurt her again, he simply wasn’t willing to risk it. “Would you considering having dinner with me next Saturday?” He wanted to talk about his plans with the psychiatrist, and apologize in person, he knew he needed to allow some time to pass first though; he didn’t have enough control over himself to do it then.
“I’ll have to let you know next week, I start my new job on Monday and I’m not sure what kind of hours will be involved yet.” Were they really having this cold conversation, she thought to herself, it was like nothing had happened between them, either the good or the bad.
“I understand.” He didn’t understand really, but after what he’d done, and the way he’d acted, the least he could do was give her space until he sorted his shit out.
She had no idea what to say to this distant Rhett, who was breaking her heart with every line. A part of her wanted to scream at him to demand she come back, even if the rational part of her knew that wasn’t the way a relationship was supposed to work. “Okay.” That sounded so lame, she thought, why couldn’t he just tell her what to do again, at least she knew where she stood then.
“I’ll call you during the week, if that’s alright.” He wanted to make her feel as if she was in control of the situation, and not like he was trying to take charge of everything again, but it was a new arena for him and he had no idea how to go about it.
“That sounds fine.” She found herself fighting back tears, it was like she was talking to a casual acquaintance rather than the man who had set her body on fire and challenged her mind at every turn. “I need to go now, Rhett.” She needed to get off the phone, before she begged him to stop pretending like what they had shared had been nothing, she could feel herself withering and dying inside and knew if she didn’t end the call she would end up doing something she would regret.
“Take care of yourself then, Leah, I’ll speak with you soon.” He didn’t want to end their conversation, but he didn’t want to try and keep her on the phone if she had plans. In addition to that he knew if he didn’t get off the phone soon he would say or do something to wreck things, so ending the conversation then was the right thing to do.
“Goodbye, Rhett.” Leah ended the call, fighting back the emotions that were building inside her, and which threatened to explode out of her like a reservoir blocked by a poorly constructed dam, as she did so. Hardening her heart against the ache the call had caused she dropped the phone carelessly on the bed and then, adopting as cheerful a pose as she could, made her way back out into the main room, where Janie and the two men were waiting for her. “I’m starving!” she announced. She wasn’t, not really, but knew if she didn’t act as normal as possible then Janie would want to know what was wrong, and that would only cause her to break down.
“I could definitely eat.” Janie smiled. It was a little early to eat, but she sensed something was off with her friend, even if she didn’t want the others to know about it, and if having dinner was going to take her mind off it then Janie was alright with that.
“Would you like to join me in taking these lovely ladies out to eat, Alex?” David asked, winking at Janie he walked over and put his arm around her waist lovingly.
“I’d be honored.” Alex was enjoying the company of the couple; not only that but he and David had been discussing a business plan he was interested in talking about further.
Dinner had been strangely comforting, Leah thought as they arrived back at the hotel. She’d worried about dwelling on Rhett’s strange attitude on the phone, but that hadn’t been the case. Alex had proven himself very good at engaging people in conversation, and capable of conversing on a wide variety of subjects; she had found herself enjoying his company. Being with Janie again, and knowing that her best friend in the world no longer hated her, had made a world of difference as well.
Alone with Leah, who he found to be a breath of fresh air, Alex felt a little uncomfortable. He was drawn to her, more than he cared to admit. “Thank you for a lovely evening, Leah, I enjoyed meeting your friends.” That had to be the understatement of the year, he thought with a wry smile. Janie had a lively sense of humor and an engaging personality that could have drawn anyone out of their shell, and David had given him more information in an hour on the economic situation in Chicago than his top advisor had managed in the past week.
Setting her purse down on the table, Leah smiled at the comment. “I think they were quite taken with you.” She wished Janie had shown as much appreciation for Rhett, and then immediately regretted the thought, though she couldn’t deny that it had been weeks since she had laughed as much as
she had that evening. What worried her most was that she knew Alex was the main reason for her laughter, and that she had spent the majority of the evening comparing Alex to Rhett, and her fiancé had not come off well by the comparison.
“They both seem like wonderful people, and I have to admit, I would love to work with David on some projects I have planned.” Shrugging off his jacket, he carelessly draped it over one of the armchairs before sitting down. “So, how are you doing?” He knew he probably shouldn’t ask, but he couldn’t help himself.
Taking the chair beside Alex’s, Leah perched on the edge. “They are great folks,” she agreed. She was silent for a few moments before she answered his question, giving herself the time to consider it carefully. “I think before I met Rhett I was a little more sane, at least I felt it, but I miss him, and I think it’s going to take a while before I start to feel sane again,” she told him with a shrug. She couldn’t be more honest than that.
“Sometimes it helps if you talk things out.” He gave a sympathetic smile. “Trying to start over can be a huge step when any relationship ends, both mentally and emotionally. I’m sure you know that.”
“Actually, Rhett was my only relationship.” She flushed deeply as she made the admission, not sure why she had. She barely knew the man before her, but for reasons she couldn’t quite grasp, she felt a strong bond with him. Maybe it was because she knew he was a dominant, and understood at least some of what she had been going through, and better than she did; she nibbled at her lip as she considered the notion.
Alex was floored by her revelation; when Rhett had told him she was new, he assumed he had meant she was new to the lifestyle, not a complete innocent. “So Rhett was your first lover?” He had no right to ask such a personal question and immediately regretted the impulse that had made him ask it.
Beyond 10 Nights (Forbidden Desires Series) Page 9