by Apryl Baker
“That would be Mirror Boy, AKA Eric.”
Eric grins and goes over to stand beside Dan. He grins at me and then the temperature gets colder and colder. I can hear the water turn on in the bathroom. Eric is using the moisture caused by the running water to ice up the windows right next to Dan. I would have freaked out a couple days ago seeing this, but I know Eric is only playing a joke this time. He doesn’t mean any harm.
Dan stares in fascination at the windows as ice covers them. He turns to give me a look of utter disbelief. No way can he explain this away. He looks as terrified as I felt the first time I saw a ghost with a nasty mangled injury. At least he’s spared seeing them on daily, sometimes hourly basis.
“Isn’t he the one who hurt you?” Dan asks at last.
“Yeah, but he didn’t mean to,” I tell him. “He was trying to warn me, but I didn’t listen. It was because of him and the other ghosts I survived long enough for you to find me. They helped me with Mrs. Olson.”
He nods and comes to sit back down, his face serious again. “Are you going to do this a lot?”
“Define ‘this’. I do a lot of stupid stuff.”
“Leave me voicemails breaking up with me.”
“Officer Dan, we can’t break up ’cuz we were never together.”
“Mattie,” he growls.
“Maybe.”
“Well, get over it because I love you, Mattie Hathaway. I’m not sure what that means right now, but I do. You’re stuck with me, Squirt. I’m not going anywhere.”
The truth of that statement is shining in those liquid brown eyes of his. I can get lost in those warm brown depths if I let myself. I think I love him just a bit, too. I don’t know if it’s the way a girl usually loves a boy or if I love him like a friend or like a brother, but I do love him. I think he’s as confused as I am about that love. My heart clenches in fear at that admission. I’ve never let myself love anyone, ever. Not since Mamma. This could be very bad.
“Or it could be very good,” Eric whispers by my ear.
“Are you eavesdropping?” I screech silently at him.
“Sure am,” he replies unrepentantly. “Don’t push him away, Mattie. Let him in. Let him be there for you like I want to and can’t. Let him love you. Don’t be afraid. Love doesn’t hurt, not always.”
“Are you talking to Ghost Boy again?” Dan asks suspiciously. “Your eyes are a little unfocused.”
“Be quiet, Officer Dan,” I whisper, staring at Eric. He looks so sad, but he’s smiling at me with his one-hundred-watt smile. “Eric…”
“Shhh, Mattie. Trust yourself, trust him. It’ll work out. Now, I am going to go roust out a rather pesky ghost terrorizing the surgical floor. Poor guy keeps trying to get people to watch him throw a football.”
Just like that, he’s gone again. I shake my head. That boy moves fast. He’s also hurting. He is watching me live while he’s stuck as a ghost. It’s so not fair.
“Why are you crying, Mattie?” Dan asks, alarmed.
“Because everything is so messed up,” I whisper. “I’m messed up.” Dan tries to interrupt me, but I don’t let him. “I didn’t want to let you get close, Dan, but you got past every wall I have and that terrifies me. You see me, the girl who hits firsts and asks questions later. You don’t care about my snarky attitude. You see me. And as much as you scare me, I’m glad you didn’t give up on me. All I wanted to do was to take back everything I said in that message while I was down in that basement. I… I… I love you too. You’re my friend and that’s all I need for right now.”
“Then that’s what I’ll be, I’ll be your friend for as long as you need me to be.” He gives me a kiss on the forehead, much like Eric had done. I don’t get any butterflies in my stomach this time though. Dan’s kiss only makes me feel safe, warm, and loved. Maybe that’s all I ever really needed.
Maybe for once, I can be happy.
Chapter Thirty-One
It’s not the cold that wakes me up this time, but something else. I know there’s a ghost here even without opening my eyes. I feel not just the cold, but an energy. It surrounds the bed, almost suffocating me. I know who it is. Why has she waited this long to come to me?
My mother is sitting at the foot of the hospital bed. She’s wearing the same stained pink tank top and blue jean shorts she wore when she died. Her blond hair isn’t stringy or messy. It’s the one thing she kept up. I remember she used to sit and brush it for hours on end. Sometimes she’d even let me. It looks as soft as ever. Her blue eyes are sad, but I expected that. She always looked sad. My mother is beautiful. The drugs aged her, but only a little. She hadn’t been hard core when she died. She might have been doing heroin for maybe a couple months.
“My beautiful girl,” her voice sighs through the room.
“What are you doing here?” I ask her. My hand automatically searches for the nurses call button, but I realize with a start, I can’t do anything. My hands are bound. She could do some serious damage to me before anyone found out.
She reaches out to me and I flinch away. Her hand drops and there is regret in her eyes.
“You were such a beautiful baby. I loved you the minute I saw you. You were smiling before you were a month old. There was this joy in you even as a baby. I only ever wanted to protect you. Please remember that. I love you more than life itself, Mattie.”
“Then why did you try to kill me?” I hear no fear in my voice, no emotion at all really. Honestly, I think I’m just tapped out for the day. After what I went through, my Mom doesn’t scare me all that much anymore. Not that I’m gonna let go of the nurses call button, though. I’m not stupid. I’ll figure out a way to use the darn thing.
“To protect you, but I can’t anymore. You are shining like a lighthouse. I can’t do it anymore.”
“I don’t understand.” Protect me from what?
The light I’d seen before at the house opens up in the window. My mother stares at it and then looks back at me. The light is for her.
“Forgive me, Mattie.”
“For trying to kill me, Mamma?” I wasn’t sure I could.
“No, not for that.”
“Then for what?”
“Just remember everything I did, I did to keep you safe, sweetheart.”
“You’re not making sense, Mamma.”
She smiles at me and then goes over to stand in front of the light. She tells me one thing before she walks into that glowing warmth.
“I’m not your mother, Mattie.”
About the Author
So who am I? Well, I'm the crazy girl with an imagination that never shuts up. I LOVE scary movies. My friends laugh at me when I scare myself watching them and tell me to stop watching them, but who doesn't love to get scared? I grew up in a small town nestled in the southern mountains of West Virginia where I spent days roaming around in the woods, climbing trees, and causing general mayhem. Nights I would stay up reading Nancy Drew by flashlight under the covers until my parents yelled at me to go to sleep.
Growing up in a small town, I learned a lot of values and morals, I also learned parents have spies everywhere and there's always someone to tell your mama you were seen kissing a particular boy on a particular day just a little too long. So when you get grounded, what is there left to do? Read! My Aunt Jo gave me my first real romance novel. It was a romance titled "Lord Margrave's Deception." I remember it fondly. But I also learned I had a deep and abiding love of mysteries and anything paranormal. As I grew up, I started to write just that and would entertain my friends with stories featuring them as main characters.
Now, I live Huntersville, NC where I entertain my niece and nephew and watch the cats get teased by the birds and laugh myself silly when they swoop down and then dive back up just out of reach. The cats start yelling something fierce...lol.
I love books, I love writing books, and I love entertaining people with my silly stories.
Acknowledgements
As always, I have to thank my girls: Susan,
Mags, Sheree, Ang, and Ann. You guys keep me on pace and never let me by with stupid stuff.
Special thanks to Mags and Lawrence. Mags, what can I say? Without you, this book wouldn’t be where it is. You believed in it when I didn’t. Lawrence, you made sure my facts were straight and I needed that help with the forensics. Grazie, my friends.
The cover of this book is near and dear to my heart. We searched and searched until we found the perfect image. It took a bit of work to actually get the image. So I want to give my personal thanks to the people responsible for the artwork itself. Thank you to Gemma Wright and Tugba Sevinc, and Aelathen from Deviant Art. Tirzalaughs – you took the image I gave you and created a cover that has inspired so many to read the book. Your work is as always gorgeous. Thank you so much for all your hard work on it and for putting up with my constant nagging.
Most of all, I have to thank all the fans at Wattpad – you guys inspire me every day and I love you all.
My favorite band, Fall Out Boy, deserves a thank you as well. Your song “My Songs Know What You Did In the Dark” helped me write the last few chapters of the book.
Last, but not least, thanks to my family for putting up with me during my writing spurts. I know I zone out when I write. I hear you…really…
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