“Well, then,” I said. “I’m pleased to hear that everything managed to work itself out.”
“More or less, mistress,” she agreed, her tone uncertain. “Oh, but what a row Lord Arnad and Lord Shaine had—not shouting, you know, the way my ma and da used to, but still.”
Wearily, I asked, “So what happened?”
“Oh, they exchanged a few more words, and then Lord Arnad decided to leave in a huff, and took all his slaves and retainers with him. Word is in the kitchens that Lord Arnad has always had too high an opinion of himself—although I have to say he is very handsome—and Lord Shaine never had much use for him.”
Then at least I hadn’t caused a rift in a long-standing friendship. I had seen Arnad’s type before, young men born to wealth and privilege and gifted with pleasing countenances, men who thought that everyone and everything should bow their way. This was the first time I had been at odds with such a man, however, and I fervently hoped it would be the last.
Hesitating for a moment, Elissa looked away from me, then said, “But his lordship would like to speak with you.”
“His lordship?” I echoed, and the worry that I’d thought I had dispelled began to wash over me once more.
“In his study. Now.” A frown creased her pretty brow, and she added impulsively, “I’m sure it’s nothing, mistress! Perhaps he just wanted to make sure you were all right.”
Hardly the sort of concern a master would afford his slave, I thought, but I didn’t bother to protest. Feeling even more drained, I stood and said, “Well, I suppose I shall see soon enough.”
There being little else for her to say, she stood in mute worry as I passed her by and descended the two flights of steps to Lord Shaine’s study. I knocked, even as I said, “My lord? It’s Merys.”
This time I did not receive the usual command to enter. Instead, the door opened after the space of a few heartbeats, and Lord Shaine stood there, unsmiling. “Come in,” he said, and turned, leaving me to follow him after I had shut the door behind me.
Two chairs had been pulled up to the low-burning fire in the hearth. He indicated that I should take one, and I sat, feeling distinctly uneasy. It did not help matters that he remained standing.
His were not the actions of a man toward his slave. How many of the other household servants had ever been seated in his presence? I shot him a quick, sideways glance, but once again I could not read his expression.
Not knowing what to say, I sat silently and waited. He gathered up a filled wine goblet and handed it to me. “You look as if you could use this,” he said.
I knew I could not protest. Instead, I took the goblet from him and allowed myself a few sips.
“Rather an interesting scene, didn’t you think?” he asked suddenly, turning and fixing me with a sudden gaze. I had a sudden thought of one of Master Golan’s beetles back at the Order’s examination room, skewered to a bit of parchment with a pin.
Still, I did not want Lord Shaine to see me cowed. “It depends on how one defines ‘interesting,’ I think,” I replied, and sipped at my wine once more.
“Perhaps ‘uncomfortable’ is a better word,” he said. Then he lifted his own goblet to his lips and drank, more deeply than I had of my own wine.
“My apologies, my lord, for any disruption of the evening, but truly I had no hand in the matter. Lord Arnad acted quite—” I paused for a moment, searching for the right word— “precipitately.”
The straight, wide-set brows dropped a bit as he considered. “That one will do, I suppose. And although I was able to fend off that ‘precipitate’ young man, it was not done without inviting the attention of everyone in the hall, as well as his ‘ill regard’—his words, not mine. But of course you were not there for the conclusion of the scene, were you?”
“No, my lord, having left upon your counsel.” Now I could sense his anger; he was a man who kept his emotions in check for the most part, but in this matter the control had slipped just enough for me to see the rage beneath it. “I did nothing to invite his attentions, Lord Shaine. Indeed, if I had known that he was the sort to thrust those attentions upon the nearest halfway appealing female, I should have taken greater care to stay out of the great hall.”
“Indeed,” he said. “And now I have to contend with the questions and the rumors—why on earth would Lord Shaine not consent to sell one slave, when offered such a ridiculous price for her? Could it be that he has some greater reason for keeping her than merely as a nursemaid for his daughter?”
Head bowed, I stared down into my goblet, gazing into the deep garnet-colored liquid as if I could find answers there. These were the questions I had dared not ask myself. Truly, if I were no more than a slave to him, then why would he have cared whether I left his household or not? But I had never gotten the slightest hint that he had any more regard for me than as the one who had saved his daughter’s life.
During my time at the estate, I had gleaned as much as I could regarding his lordship’s history, not that there was any more to it than the same sad story I had heard many times before. The marriage had been arranged, of course, but he and his young wife had apparently cared for one another. She suffered a miscarriage. Then she gave birth to Auren, and all seemed well. True, an unmarried girl could not inherit, but they would find her a strong husband, and the estates would be safe. Besides, plenty of time remained for Auren to have many brothers. A boy was born, a boy who died when only five days old. Then another boy. Sickly, he barely lived for three months, and perished, chest heaving and face blue from what I guessed must have been a malformed heart. The third son lived only a few hours, and this time he took his mother with him in death.
Lord Shaine never remarried. No one knew whether it was because he had loved his wife so much that he could bear to see no other in her place, or because he dared not risk seeing the death of yet another child. Auren had always been a vigorous and active girl, and obviously Lord Shaine had pinned all his hopes on her. No wonder he had been so desperate when she was injured. The loss of his only remaining child surely would have been incalculable. Some whispered that he was unwise in his adamant refusal to remarry, for he was cousin to the king, and as such should have been more concerned with furthering his bloodline. Perhaps, but I could not find it in my heart to condemn him for his choice.
I opened my mouth to speak, but he held up his hand.
“Let me set your mind at rest, Mistress Merys.” Once again he sounded very formal. “My concern for you is only what I would have for someone who most certainly saved my daughter’s life…and also for a well-born, educated woman who deserves better than to be the latest toy for Lord Arnad’s bed.”
Startled, I stared at him, unable for a moment to find any words. Oh, I had been fairly certain of Arnad’s intentions, but to hear them spoken of so openly—
Lord Shaine must have noticed my shocked expression, for his mouth pulled into a grim smile even as he said, “I had assumed you were a woman of the world. How could you not be, if you have truly spent the last few years traveling and seeing all manner of human disease and injury?”
I made a dismissive gesture. Of course he was correct. Sheltered I certainly was not, and although I had never experienced the act myself, I knew everything about relations between women and men…as well as everything that resulted from such relations, from childbirth to the pox.
“You were not mistaken, Lord Shaine,” I said at length, knowing he expected some sort of reply. “It is true that as a physician there is very little I have not seen over the years. Please forgive me if I seemed at all shocked or surprised by what you said. I know you were only trying to protect me.”
That statement seemed to mollify him, as I had hoped it would. He took another sip of his wine—a smaller one this time. “Luckily, Lord Arnad’s temper is as changeable as it is quick. I have no doubt that by this same time next week he will have found something else to rouse his ire, or his interest.” Lord Shaine watched me closely, but this time with a
slightly amused crinkle at the corner of his eyes. “If he doesn’t lay siege to my castle within the next few days, I will consider us safely past this crisis.”
I could tell he did not mean for me to take him seriously, so I ventured a fleeting smile. “I am very sorry, my lord, if any of this upset Auren—”
He shook his head. “I believe she was more worried for you. It seems she’s formed quite an attachment over this past month.” His expression darkened somewhat, and he added, “That is yet another reason why I would not willingly see you go from this place.”
“I have no intention of doing so, my lord,” I replied, feeling a liar even as I said the words. Truly, I would not have gone with Lord Arnad of my own accord, but I still hoped and prayed that someone would come soon to secure my freedom.
“Very good, Merys.” For a brief moment he looked abstracted, his gaze far away from the genteelly shabby room, and then he said, “I just wanted to make sure you understood why I handled the situation as I did.”
“I do, my lord. And I thank you once again.”
“Then that is all. You must be weary.”
“Yes, my lord.” I bowed my head, and then turned to go. But even as I made my way to the door, I caught him looking at me with a slightly baffled gaze, as if he had possibly meant to say more but somehow hadn’t quite managed to do so.
What he had desired to say, I wasn’t sure and perhaps didn’t want to know. All I did know was that I had managed to survive another encounter with him with both my dignity and my position intact. I could only hope that in the coming weeks there would be nothing else to mar the fragile understanding which had come to grow between us.
Not long afterward, winter closed in upon Donnishold. An early snow howled down past the shoulders of the Opal Mountains, enclosing Lord Shaine’s estate in its icy grip. The wind seemed to find its way in through new chinks in the ancient stone walls and around the warped wood that enclosed the much later-period glass windows with which the castle had been fitted. I recalled that when I had been a young girl I had thought a castle a most romantic place to live, especially when contrasted with my father’s handsome but oh-so-prosaic townhouse of modern construction. But now, having experienced the discomfort of a castle, I recalled with some fondness the stout wooden floors, the tightly glazed windows, and the hypocaust of my family home.
“It heated the floors?” Auren asked in some astonishment one day, after I had rubbed my chapped hands for what seemed like the hundredth time and made an unkind comment about the heating arrangements in her father’s castle.
“Yes, and the walls on the ground floor. One could sit comfortably without having to be wrapped in shawls and cloaks.”
We all sat in her chamber, Auren and Elissa and I. At least she had a hearth, whereas Elissa’s and my chilly room could be heated only by a brazier. And having three bodies in such a small space also did much to help ward off the drafts.
My handiness with a needle had been put to good use in assisting with Auren’s wedding gown. One of the other household slaves whose talents lay in such areas had already draped the glinting gold-threaded damask over her and cut out the basic pieces, but it fell to me to embroider the traditional musk roses over the bodice and the full detached sleeves. I held one of those sleeves now, and was glad of the extra layer of warm fabric draped across my lap.
“No wonder you complain of the cold so. Although,” she added slyly, “one would think that someone who has to travel to treat sick people all the time would be better able to live with it.”
“I can bear it, if I must,” I replied calmly. “But that doesn’t mean I enjoy it.”
Auren stared back at me for a moment, dark eyes wide, and then she began to giggle. I noticed that she laughed more readily these days, and more and more she walked about the house and the grounds without the aid of her crutch. She looked forward to the summer, when her betrothed would come to her here and take his place at her side. Since he was a younger son, and she an only daughter, he would become the heir to Lord Shaine’s estates and take on the family name. That was how these things were managed in Seldd, so the line would always continue unbroken.
I was just gladdened to see her nearly healed and light of heart. Certainly the dark weather had done nothing to dampen her spirits. I only wished I could have said the same for myself.
With winter upon us, my chances of any sort of rescue before the spring thaw began to seem more and more remote. Of course some limited trade continued through the winter months, but those who didn’t have to travel chose the wiser course and stayed home whenever possible. Perhaps someone from my Order could bribe a merchant and his train to make the perilous journey into Seldd at the time of the snows…perhaps not. I supposed that it would depend greatly on how valuable they deemed me.
Lord Shaine did not allow his slaves to sit idle through the winter months, although the flax had been harvested and the vegetable gardens gleaned of all they could produce before the first frosts descended. Beyond the slaves’ quarters sat three long, low buildings in which the flax was processed and then woven into fine cloth that would be taken to market once the snows had melted. Recently he had expanded this enterprise into dyeing the cloth as well, and on days when the snow held off, I could see the lengths of fabric drying on numerous ropes stretched between the buildings. The lively shades of blue, green, red, ochre, and amber were bright notes against the muddy snow, incongruous gleams of color in an otherwise dull landscape.
Again I found myself impressed by Lord Shaine and his clear mind. All around us the world was changing, slowly but certainly. More and more people came to the cities, to work in the new iron foundries and factories where all sorts of goods were being produced: pottery, furniture, wagons, textiles, tools—the list was endless. In a way, his lordship had created his own factory here, where he could directly profit from the production of the fine linen for which Seldd was known. Apparently he was the first of the local lords to attempt such an undertaking, but I had seen several of them (although thankfully not Lord Arnad) come to visit the estate and tour the facilities here.
That hotheaded lord had taken himself off in a huff. Word trickled back to us that in an act of retaliation he had apparently hired Dorus as his new steward, but although this news produced in me a vague uneasiness, I could not think how Dorus’ new position would make a difference to those of us who remained at Lord Shaine’s estate. No doubt the erstwhile steward had been privy to some of his lordship’s private matters, but that was a matter of concern to Lord Shaine, not me. And of course I worried for the slaves at Lord Arnad’s estate, for I did not think it would take long before Dorus’ old habits reasserted themselves. I was also fairly certain Lord Arnad would not champion their rights the way Lord Shaine had those of his own servants. Still, there was little I could do about it now, and since Lord Shaine had taken the news in stride, I attempted to do the same as well.
Suddenly restless, I laid my embroidery aside and went to the window. The glass here was of a better quality than that in my own chamber’s window, and I had a fine view of the courtyard. The skies had lowered again, and I somehow could sense that snow would begin to fall again very soon. For now the weather held, although it was bitterly cold, so chill I could see the vague mist of my breath as I stood there, looking out through the faintly streaked glass.
Because of the cold, the courtyard was mostly deserted; two men-at-arms huddled in their cloaks near the main gates, and as I watched, I saw one of them stamp his feet against the chill and blow on his gloved hands. Miserable duty, no doubt, and I did not envy them, even though they were free and I was not. Farther off I caught a sudden flicker of color as two slaves strung a length of vivid blue fabric between the dyeing house and one of the weaving buildings. They worked as quickly as possible, bare fingers probably numb in the freezing air. I thought then of how lucky I had been in my reception here, slave status or no. That could have been me, shivering in the cold while performing back-breaking work for
no pay but a few meals and a place to lay my head.
Then I saw the men-at-arms suddenly snap to attention. Looking past them, I spied a largish party of men on horseback approaching the castle gates. Numbering ten or so, they led several heavily laden pack animals with them, and they did not appear to be armed beyond the usual short swords any man traveling the roads would carry.
My heart began to pound—foolishly, I knew, because this could just be an ordinary caravan of merchants, chancing travel at this season because of the higher prices they could command. Then again, Lord Shaine’s estate was remote. Auren had told me that often they saw no outside visitors save their nearest neighbors for the entire winter. So why these travelers now? Could my rescue finally be upon me?
“What do you see, Merys?” Auren asked, and I turned, hoping that my face would not reveal any betraying excitement.
“It appears that a caravan of merchants is approaching the castle,” I replied, trying to keep my tone level, indifferent.
“Really?” She tossed aside the pillowcase she had been embroidering—indifferently, as it was obvious her skills were shaky at best—then hurried over to the window, her limp hardly noticeable in her excitement. I barely had a chance to step aside before she brushed past me, wiping at the foggy window panes so she could gain a better view. She peered out for a moment, then announced, “We should go down to the hall to greet them.”
“As you wish,” I replied, with a curl of the lip. Perhaps it was her duty as the de facto lady of the castle to offer such hospitality. I was more inclined to think she merely desired anything that would break up the mundane routine of her day. Not that I could blame her—the days of inactivity, with only the occasional chilblain or cough to require my skills, had begun to wear on me as well.
Dorus had not yet been replaced. Lord Shaine’s personal servant, Ourrel, still supervised the daily routine of the castle, so it was he whom we first encountered when we descended the stairs. Elissa stayed behind, to continue the necessary but tedious darning of Auren’s stockings.
All Fall Down Page 9