by Nancy Krulik
“Nah, he did it all wrong,” a spotted sea lion argued. “He was supposed to catch it with his nose.” He turned to the dark brown sea lion. “That’s why I don’t want any flipperless folks in our act. Sheesh. Everyone wants to be in showbiz.”
“I don’t want to be in showbiz,” I said.
A really chubby sea lion smiled at me. “I know, you want an autograph,” she purred. “All my fans want an autograph. Not that I blame you. I’m the star of this show.”
“You are not,” the spotted sea lion told her. “Just because you do that one flip at the end doesn’t make you the star.” He looked at me. “I’m the one whose autograph you want, kid.”
The spotted sea lion tossed the ball to the chubby sea lion. She twirled around and caught it on her nose. Then she smiled and gave a little bow.
I just stood there.
“Don’t I get some applause?” the chubby sea lion asked me. “My adoring fans always applaud for me.”
“Maybe he’s not so adoring,” the dark brown sea lion told her.
“Then he’s not getting my autograph,” the chubby sea lion said.
Frankly, I wasn’t sure how she could give me an autograph, anyway. It wasn’t like sea lions had fingers to write with.
Besides, autographs were the last things on my mind. What I needed right now were answers.
Chapter 12
“What are those sea lions saying?” Elizabeth asked me. She was sitting in the bleachers near the tank with her notebook and pen in her hands.
“I don’t know if they’re going to be any help,” I called back nervously to her.
“What do you mean we won’t be any help?” the chubby sea lion demanded. “Celebrities are very helpful.”
I didn’t think the sea lion was exactly a celebrity, but I knew if I was going to get any answers, I was going to have to play along.
“Oh, I know,” I told her. “Celebrities help kids all over the world.”
“And you’re a kid,” the chubby sea lion said. “So how can I help?”
“Well, I was wondering — have you seen anyone around here carrying a giant ancient tooth?” I asked.
All three sea lions stopped and stared at me.
“What, is this some sort of joke?” the dark brown sea lion asked.
“I bet we’re on a TV show,” the spotted sea lion said. “You’re playing a prank, right?”
“Where are the cameras?” the chubby sea lion asked excitedly.
“It’s not a TV show,” I said. “I really need to know. Have you seen anyone carrying a tooth? Or just something weird going on lately?”
“Well, there was that one thing,” the dark brown sea lion said.
“It was no big deal,” the spotted sea lion added.
“I hardly even noticed,” the chubby sea lion said.
“What? What?” I asked the sea lions impatiently.
“Well, it’s just that there’s this shack back there behind the bushes,” the spotted sea lion said. “No one has been there for years. Most folks have forgotten it even exists. But someone has been going back there every afternoon for the past week.”
“Oh, that’s good,” I said. I turned to Elizabeth. “Write that down.”
“Write what down?” she asked me. “All I heard was a bunch of squeaking and barking. Sea lion noises.”
Oh yeah. I forgot Elizabeth couldn’t understand what the sea lions were saying.
“There’s a shack back there that’s been abandoned for years, but someone has been going in and out of there all week long,” I told Elizabeth. “A shack would be a great place to stash stolen stuff.”
“Definitely,” Elizabeth agreed. “Ask them what the person looked like.”
Oh right. That would help. “What did the person going into the shack look like?” I asked the sea lions.
“Well, he was a flipperless fellow, like you,” the spotted sea lion said. “But there was something strange about him.”
“Oh yes, it was strange,” the chocolate sea lion agreed.
“Very strange,” the chubby sea lion added.
“WHAT WAS STRANGE?” I shouted. I was getting very frustrated.
“He had a dorsal fin,” the spotted sea lion said. “Right on the top of his head. I’ve never seen a flipperless fellow with a dorsal fin before.”
Neither had I. In fact, the whole thing sounded fishy to me. But I didn’t want to insult the sea lions again. So I just nodded and said, “Thanks for your help.” Although I didn’t really think they’d been much help at all.
“I don’t know why we’re even bothering investigating that shack,” I said to Elizabeth a few minutes later. “Those sea lions were nuts. A human with a dorsal fin on his head? That’s not possible.”
“It might be,” Elizabeth said.
“In some weird horror movie, maybe,” I told her. “But in real life, I don’t think so.”
“You have to think like a sea lion,” Elizabeth reminded me. “To a sea lion, hair could look like a dorsal fin, if it was sticking straight up.”
“Like a Mohawk!” I exclaimed excitedly. Suddenly I understood what Elizabeth was thinking. “Do you think Teddy could be the thief?”
“It’s possible,” Elizabeth said. “He does know a lot about shark teeth. And he’s mentioned going to see a sea lion show or feeding the sea lions. So he’s around here often. He had plenty of time to find the shack.”
“And he swims in the shark tank a lot,” I added. “So he could be the one stealing all the teeth from under rocks.”
“Exactly,” Elizabeth agreed. “Now we just have to prove it.”
Chapter 13
“Okay, this place is creepy,” I said as Elizabeth and I walked into the old shack. “Let’s get out of here.”
“Not until we find that giant tooth,” Elizabeth said. She lifted a blanket off the floor. About a hundred cockroaches came racing out.
“Hey! Who turned on the lights?” I heard one of them yell.
“Scatter before they start that Cucaracha dance!” another shouted. “I don’t want to get stepped on.”
“No one’s stepping on you,” I told the cockroach.
“Huh?” Elizabeth asked.
Oops. I’d forgotten Elizabeth couldn’t hear the cockroaches. “Never mind,” I said.
“Well, well, what have we here?” Elizabeth said, walking over to a large brown grocery bag. She sounded just like a detective on TV. “Just as I thought. Shark teeth!”
I peered into the bag. There were at least 40 shark teeth inside. “This is Alfred’s worst nightmare,” I joked. “A bag full of teeth.”
Elizabeth frowned. “Don’t make fun of my little brother,” she said.
Sheesh. She sure could be sensitive. But I didn’t want to argue with the only person in the whole aquarium who knew I was innocent of stealing the giant shark tooth fossil. So I apologized.
“Sorry,” I said. Then I opened a closet door and peeked inside.
And there, on the floor, hidden in a corner of the closet, was the fossilized shark tooth!
“Jackpot!” I shouted. “I found it!”
Elizabeth rushed over. “Yep, that’s it,” she said as I pulled the giant tooth out into the light.
“Come on,” I said. “Let’s get out of here and give this to that guard. I can’t wait to clear my name.”
“That won’t clear your name,” Elizabeth told me.
Huh?
“Everyone will just think you took it, and now you’re giving it back,” Elizabeth told me. “We have to prove that Teddy was the crook.”
Oh man. I hate when the Brainiac is right.
“So how are we going to prove that?” I asked.
“Teddy is going to come back here for the tooth, and we’ll be here waiting for him,” Elizabeth told me. “Let’s hide in the closet. That way we can pop out when he arrives and surprise him. The element of surprise is important when you’re trying to catch a criminal. Detectives in books surprise crooks all t
he time.”
She sounded really sure Teddy would show up at the shack. That made me nervous. “What are we supposed to do when he gets here?” I asked her. “He’s older than we are. And bigger. He could go crazy on us.”
Elizabeth didn’t say anything. I guess she hadn’t thought about that possibility. People don’t usually go crazy on kids in books that are written for kids. But this was no book. This was real life. And that meant anything was possible.
But I went into the closet and hid next to Elizabeth just the same. I couldn’t just leave my partner to face a crazy tooth-stealing crook alone.
Elizabeth gave me one of her weird smiles and twirled one of her wormy curls around her finger.
Ugh. I hated when Elizabeth acted like that. I sure hoped Teddy didn’t take a long time getting here.
Creak. Just then, the door to the shack opened and somebody came inside. I peeked through a slit in the closet door. Sure enough, it was a flipperless fellow with a dorsal fin on his head — otherwise known as Teddy.
Elizabeth sprang into action. She flung the closet door open and leaped out. “Stop right there!” she shouted at Teddy.
I just stood there, frozen, staring out at them from the closet. My feet wouldn’t move.
“What are you two doing here?” Teddy asked. He didn’t sound mad, or even scared. In fact, he was perfectly calm, which was weird since we’d just caught him sneaking into a shack full of stolen shark teeth.
“We’re here to get back the giant shark tooth fossil so we can clear Jack’s name,” Elizabeth told him. “We already found the fossil. And now we know for sure who the real thief is.”
“It’s you,” I said. “And we’re telling.”
Teddy stared at us for a minute. His eyes got kind of small, and his lips scrunched up tight. He looked the way my mom did that day she found Leo and I using chocolate sauce to paint my room brown. She had looked really, really angry.
My heart started pounding.
Teddy took a step toward us. And another. And then, he looked me right in the eye and … he began to laugh.
Chapter 14
“What’s so funny?” I demanded.
“You two are,” Teddy said. “Playing detective.”
“We’re not playing,” I shouted at him. “We are detectives.”
“Okay, detectives,” Teddy demanded. “Tell me what reason I would have for stealing a tooth fossil.”
“Well … um … you …” He had me there. I had no idea what his motive might be.
Luckily, Elizabeth had figured that part out. She turned back a few pages in her notebook and smiled. “You told us your motive when we met you,” she said. “You want to buy a bicycle. And it would take way too long to earn enough money doing chores around here. But selling a fossilized shark tooth and some shark tooth necklaces would get you the money fast.”
Teddy gave her a slow, evil smile. “Impressive thinking,” he said. “But you’re wrong. I have no interest in shark teeth.”
“Really?” Elizabeth asked him. “Then what’s that in your jacket pocket?”
I looked at Teddy. I hadn’t noticed it before, but one of his pockets was bulging.
“None of your business,” Teddy said.
“I think it is,” Elizabeth said. Before Teddy could stop her, Elizabeth reached in and pulled out a clear plastic bag full of shark tooth necklaces.
“Give that back!” Teddy shouted at her.
“Not a chance,” Elizabeth said as she held up a shark tooth that was strung onto a piece of black cord. “We’ve proved you’re the crook now. You’re making and selling shark tooth necklaces. But that wasn’t enough. You had to steal the fossil to make sure you had enough cash for the bike.”
Teddy stepped back, ran his hands over his Mohawk, and gave us another evil grin. “Okay, so you got me. I did it. But that isn’t going to do you any good.”
“Sure it will,” I said. “We’re going to turn you in.”
“Go ahead,” Teddy said. “Everyone will still think you’re the crook. They’ll think you’re just blaming it on me.”
“But we both heard you admit it,” I insisted. “It’s two against one.”
“Yeah, but she’s your girlfriend,” Teddy said.
“She is NOT my girlfriend!” I shouted. “She’s my detective partner.” Why couldn’t anybody get that straight?
“Whatever,” Teddy answered. “It doesn’t matter what you call her. Everyone will still think she’s your accomplice.”
“My what?” I asked. I hadn’t heard that word before.
“Accomplice,” Elizabeth repeated. “Someone who helps a criminal commit a crime.” She looked kind of sad. Probably because she knew Teddy was right.
“It’s my word against yours,” Teddy told me. “And who do you think the people here are going to believe? Someone who has grown up around the aquarium, or some stranger who everyone already thinks is a thief?”
Oh man. No one was ever going to believe us. Ever. This really stunk.
Teddy just stood there, smiling. “Now I’m getting out of here,” he said. He gave us one last grin as he headed for the door. He knew he had us.
At least, he thought he did. Then, suddenly, someone else stepped into the shack.
“Not so fast, Teddy,” she said. “These two kids aren’t the only witnesses here. I heard every word you said.”
Chapter 15
“Alyssa!” I shouted. Boy, was I glad to see her.
Elizabeth gave me a big smile. We both knew that the aquarium would believe Alyssa over Teddy any day. She was an adult. And she hadn’t been caught red-handed, the way he had.
“What are you doing here?” Teddy asked her.
“I was looking for Jack and Elizabeth, to tell them it was almost time for Mia’s birthday cake,” Alyssa said. “I heard some people arguing in the shack, so I walked over to see what the trouble was. And I definitely found a troublemaker.”
Teddy just looked at her. He didn’t seem very scary anymore. Instead, he looked scared himself.
Alyssa took the giant shark tooth fossil from my hands. “Okay, Teddy. You and I are going to put this back where it belongs. And then we’re going to give all those shark teeth over to the aquarium shop, where they can sell them to raise money to take care of the shark tank and buy more fish treats for the sharks.”
I grinned. I knew that little shark would like that a lot. He’d probably think the sea tooth fairy had brought the fish treats just for him.
“And then we’re going to go tell your dad what happened,” Alyssa told him. “He’s not going to be happy.”
Teddy didn’t say anything. He just followed Alyssa glumly out of the shack. Then he turned and glared at Elizabeth and me.
“Why couldn’t you just stay out of it?” he asked us angrily.
“Because we’re detectives,” I told him. “And solving cases is what we do.”
“Well, Jack, I guess we all owe you an apology,” Alyssa said a few minutes later. We were standing in the long hallway where the fish tanks were. Mia and her friends had gathered around us. The giant shark tooth was back where it belonged.
Frank the guard looked at me and grumbled. It was probably as close to an apology as he’d ever given.
“To show you how grateful we are that you two found the fossil, I am giving you each a lifetime family pass to the aquarium.” Alyssa handed plastic guest passes to Elizabeth and me.
“Does this mean I can come and swim with the sharks again?” I asked.
“And I can study some of the sea life?” Elizabeth wondered.
“Any time you like,” Alyssa assured us.
“MOM! I want a guest pass,” Mia the Pain whined. “It’s my birthday. I should have the guest pass!”
“It’s a family pass, Mia,” my mother said. “We can all use it.”
“But I want to hold it,” Mia whined.
I shook my head. Birthday or no birthday, Mia wasn’t getting her hands on the pass I’d worked s
o hard for.
“Let’s have some birthday cake,” Alyssa suggested. “And we’ll all sing to Mia.”
A huge grin formed on my sister’s face. There was nothing she liked more than being the center of attention.
We all walked over to a table that had been set up near the tanks. Mia’s fish-shaped cake was covered with seven candles — six years and one for good luck.
“Come on everyone, let’s sing!” Alyssa said. “Happy birthday to you …”
Mia stood there, smiling and waving her hands up and down like she was conducting an orchestra.
Just then, my attention drifted away from Mia. I heard two familiar voices coming from the fish tank on the wall.
“So, did you hear what Ollie the octopus said when he asked Sally the squid on a date?” Hoho the clown fish asked.
“No. What?” Bobo wondered.
“I want to hold your hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand,” Hoho answered.
I started laughing. That was a funny one!
“MOM!” Mia stopped blowing out her candles and shouted. “Jack’s laughing at me.”
I rolled my eyes. Now this was a real mystery: how to stop Mia the Pain from being a pain.
But I had a feeling that was one case nobody would ever be able to solve — not even amazing detectives like the Brainiac and me!
About the Author
NANCY KRULIK has written more than 150 books for children and young adults, including three New York Times bestsellers. She is the author of the popular How I Survived Middle School, Katie Kazoo Switcheroo, and George Brown, Class Clown series. Nancy lives in Manhattan with her husband, composer Daniel Burwasser, their two children, Ian and Amanda, and a beagle named Josie.
Copyright
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