by Lynn Lorenz
"That we need to slow down, Luci."
She grew very quiet and pulled away from him. "Of course. We hardly know each other." She took a deep breath and brushed her hair from her face.
"Right. And my curse must be of some account." Rolf sat up and ran his hand through his hair. The damned curse was everything. Would he would ever return to the joy he'd just felt as they rolled happily on the ground?
Luci stood, pressed her hands against the material of her dress, and turned from him.
"Luci, I just want to be able to think clearly." He followed her.
"Oh, do I muddle your brain?" She turned and glared at him.
He could see the hurt in her eyes. He never meant to reject her, just look to her safety and protect her. He took her hand. "You do, woman. You make it impossible for me to think about anything but you. I forget that I'm a monster and damned. The way you smell, look, feel in my arms and taste in my mouth are the only things I can think about."
Her hope seemed to return at his words. "Then there may be a chance for us? Come with me tomorrow and spend the day. We can get to know each other better."
"Luci, that won't change what I am." He shook his head.
"I have no intention of changing you, Rolf, just your mind." Her wicked grin flashed at him.
They strolled back to the castle. Rolf took her hand and placed it on his arm. "I want to take this slow, Luci. If it's to be, then it will be. If it's wrong, then we'll have found out before either of us is hurt." Too late for him, but perhaps he could spare her.
"You're right, Rolf. It's just my nature. Sarah says I'm too impetuous, rash, and that I'm always jumping in before I fully understand the situation."
"Will Sarah mind if I steal you away for the day?"
"No, it's why she asked me to come. To steal you away." She brought his hand to her lips and looked into his eyes. "Was she right?"
More than anything Rolf wanted to tell her he loved her, that he'd fallen in love with her the moment he'd first laid eyes on her. That he was hers until the end, but caution won out. It was much easier to be rational when he wasn't kissing her.
"Perhaps. Let's see." Rolf stood a little taller as he escorted her to the castle.
* * * *
Stefan's hand held the side of Sarah's face as his thumb stroked her cheek. She leaned into it. How did his touch make her body ache for more?
Sarah swallowed, unable to get any words out.
"It's soft as a rose petal."
"Is it?" Looking up into his eyes, she struggled to think and speak.
"Aye. And I have been most interested in the taste of your lips." His thumb moved to brush her lips.
"Have you?" Why was it she couldn't seem to string more than two words together when he touched her?
"Hmm. Since the first time I saw you in the hall. Do you remember?" His eyes looked into hers, and he lifted her chin upward.
"I remember."
Stefan lowered his head, his eyes focused on her lips. Closing her eyes, she waited for his kiss. Time seemed to stretch.
His lips touched hers in the barest kiss and lingered only a moment. Pulling away, he rested his forehead against hers. "Sarah, your lips are so soft." She could feel him tremble, or was that her?
"And the taste?" she asked.
"I couldn't quite tell. I think I'll need another kiss." A slow smile spread over his face. "If you'll allow it, of course. I'd hate to find myself face down in the dirt."
"When you go too far, I'll let you know." Standing on her toes, Sarah reached up, took the lapel of his jacket in her hands, and pulled him down.
This time, his mouth covered hers. Stroking her lips, his tongue asked for entry. With a sigh, she parted her lips and let him in. His arms slid around her shoulders to press her to the hardness of his arousal. She didn't move away, but slid her hands down to his waist and returned the pressure. Stefan groaned and the vibration passed from his mouth to hers, making her core weep. He broke the kiss.
"The perfume of your hair drives me mad, Sarah." He pulled a tress to his face and inhaled. "The taste of your skin." He lowered his head to her throat, and licked the spot just below her ear. He laved his way back to her ear. He took its lobe between his teeth and flicked it with his tongue.
Sarah clasped him tighter to her, flooded with sensations she'd never felt before in her life. "Stefan, I've wondered about you, too. How your hands would feel on my skin. How your tongue would taste in my mouth. If you'd make me feel as if I were floating when you finally held me like this."
"How do you find me?" Stringing kisses along her temple, his soft voice whispered in her ear.
"Better even than I'd dreamed." She renewed her kiss as she pulled his face to hers. His hand dropped to cup her bottom and pull her tighter to him. Sarah moaned and pressed herself into his hardness, letting him know he wouldn't end up in the dirt.
"I want you, Sarah. Say you're mine. That you belong to me." Stefan's voice was deep, throaty, saturated with desire. "Swear it." Wrapping his hand in her hair, he pulled her head back, exposing the long column of her throat.
As he nibbled her neck, she felt as if she'd lost her mind, unable to speak or think, merely to react to the way he made her feel.
"Aye, Stefan, I'm yours. I swear it." Sarah's eyes shuttered.
Sliding his hand to her full breast, his thumb found the tip of her hard nipple under the fabric of her dress and rubbed it. She moaned her pleasure at his touch, arching into his hand.
"Let me come to you tonight." Stefan bit her earlobe.
"To my room?" Sarah fought to remain coherent against the onslaught of his attentions. A picture of him and her in her bed, making love, filled her mind and she was lost in it.
"Aye, tonight."
Oh, aye, that would be wonderful.
His kisses had turned to nips as he made his way down her throat. The night spun, the stars blurred.
To my room.
Rational thought flooded back to Sarah and slammed into her. What was she thinking? Where was her resolve? All her brave talk of keeping her heart safe was lost somewhere out here in the moonlight.
She moaned and pushed him away. "Stefan, stop."
"What's wrong, Sarah?" Stefan's eyes focused on her face, his lips full and wet from their kisses.
"It's wrong, Stefan. Your coming to my room is against the patrol policy. It would ruin my reputation and destroy both our honors."
Stefan's eyes locked on her face. She expected an attempt to convince her, to talk his way back into her arms. A lesser man would have tried, she supposed. Instead, he wiped his hand across his face in frustration and his jaw worked as he struggled to control himself.
"You're right, Sarah. Please, forgive me. The moonlight swept me away. I never meant to offend you." He released her and took a step away. "I suppose I'm just lucky I'm not spitting dirt." He bowed to her, turned, and strode back down the path toward the castle.
Sarah stood alone in the moonlight, her lips swollen from kissing Stefan, still hungry for him. Even though her breathing returned to normal, her body and her heart still longed for him.
This isn't what either of them had wanted. He'd wanted to bed her, and she'd wanted him never to stop kissing her. Couldn't they find something in between, some common ground?
What the hell was wrong with her?
She looked up at the moon and frowned.
"It's all your fault."
* * * *
"Look, there goes Inspector Bane, Rolf." Luci pointed to a man on the sloping path up to the castle.
"Can you see that far, too?"
"Yes, and my night vision is better than most. Isn't yours?"
"Yes, it is. I must be dense, though, not to have connected it with my curse, like my sense of smell. Well, Stefan seems in a hurry."
They stood still, watching as Stefan strode back to the castle, his hands in fists, long black hair flying behind him.
Rolf shook his head. "Knowing him, he and Sarah have been
at it again."
"What are you talking about?" She clutched his hand.
"I've never seen anything like it, Luci. They're in love, yet neither can admit it. They're driving each other insane with desire and frustration."
"I know. Sarah is very confused and so frightened of being hurt again."
"Again?"
"Her father betrayed her terribly when she was a child, Rolf. She's never gotten over it and she's passed his blame onto every man she's ever met. No one stands a chance. Your Inspector Bane is the first man I've ever heard her speak of in such glowing terms. Aye, she loves him, but is so scared of him hurting her that I'm afraid she's not going to give him a chance. Especially after he suspended her." Luci sighed and shook her head. "I want so much for her to be happy."
"Well, I know Stefan regrets what he did, but it was not as if he had a choice. He followed procedure."
"Don't defend him to me, Rolf. It's Sarah who needs convincing. And if the inspector can't manage it, out here, under the moonlight, well..." She shrugged.
"I want Sarah to be happy; she's done so much for me. And I owe Stefan more than you know."
Bane disappeared into the castle.
"Will you talk to him?" Luci searched his eyes.
"Me? Talk to Stefan? Are you mad? He hates me."
"Hates you? Whatever for?"
"I've never understood it. Perhaps hate is too strong. We've just never hit it off. Stefan is a difficult man to get to know." Rolf stopped walking and ran his hand through his hair. "Damn him. He has everything, yet he acts as if he has nothing. I believe he enjoys being miserable." Rolf laughed. "He's certainly made an art of it."
"He needs Sarah, and she needs him. What can we do?" Luci looked at Rolf. A slow smile spread across her face. "How shall we interfere?"
"You are wicked, Luci. Getting Stefan past his arrogance and pride will be a large order." He shook his head.
"Getting Sarah to open her heart to the chance of love will be a struggle, too."
They had reached the doors to the castle. As he held it open for her to enter, he spotted Sarah, her arms wrapped around her body, head down, as she made her way up the path.
"Here's our girl now. What's your plan?" Rolf whispered to Luci.
"I'm not sure, so let me think on it. We'll discuss it tomorrow."
He nodded. Sarah still hadn't looked up. He slipped inside and escorted Luci to her room.
At the door, he kissed her goodnight, lingering on her lips. Lost again.
"Will I be in your dreams?" She brushed a shock of hair from his forehead.
"Both waking and asleep." He grinned. "If I get any."
She laughed and traced his scar with her fingertip. Then she was through the door as it shut behind her.
Rolf walked back to his room and passed Sarah in the hall. "Good evening, Sarah."
She walked past him, head still down, and turned the corner.
He wondered what was going on in Stefan's room. Giving a short laugh, he thought, probably the same thing that's going to happen in my room, as soon as these clothes come off. He opened the door to his room and stepped inside.
Stefan sat in the chair by the fire.
"What the hell are you doing here?" Rolf startled, then relaxed. "I didn't mean for it to come out so harshly, but, damn it, man, you surprised me."
"I needed to talk to someone. Forgive me, I should've asked before just showing up in your room." Stefan stood and started for the door. "It's becoming a habit with me, I fear."
The look of utter despair on his face made Rolf relent. "No, Stefan, don't go. Stay." He strode over to a small oak secretary, pulled down the desk front, and reached inside. "Join me in a drink. I think we can both use one." He held up a decanter of dark amber liquid in one hand and two small glasses in another.
"By the One God, I could use a drink." Stefan ran his hands over his face and slumped back down into the chair.
Perhaps, Rolf thought, several drinks were in order.
Chapter 17
"Men! If I never see another one, it'll be too soon," Sarah fumed as she paced around her room, hands still in fists.
Lucinda sat back in the chair and smiled at her friend. "Sounds like things didn't go well with Inspector Bane." Luci twirled a strand of her braided hair in her fingers.
"That doesn't begin to describe it. He finally kisses me and it was wonderful. Luci, it was like nothing I've felt before." She sighed heavily.
"That's the whole point of moonlight. It was made by the One God just for lovers to kiss beneath."
"No, it was after the kiss. Well, the kissing."
"So what went wrong, dearest?" Now Luci worked the green ribbon from the braid.
"He asked if he could come to my room tonight." Sarah sat down heavily on the edge of her bed, her hand caressing the quilt.
"That wicked man! Doesn't he know that's just not done? Not by a lady, anyway." Luci looked properly shocked. The poor inspector.
"He's my superior, Luci. If he were caught in my room at night..." She shook her head. "Much less my bed."
"Well, if he does make it to your room, I should hope he'll be caught in your bed, naked, for the effort's sake, at least." Luci grinned and started to unravel another braid.
"What of my honor?"
"Honor won't keep you warm at night, my dear."
"That's what they make quilts for, Luci," Sarah shot back and flopped back on the bed, staring at the ceiling.
"Really? I thought that was what men were for." Luci shrugged and placed the ribbon with the other one draped over the arm of the chair. "What are you going to do?" Luci pulled her feet under her and settled deeper into the chair.
"I have no idea! We had a terrible argument about you."
"Did you? What was the gist?" Luci leaned her head back.
"He thought it was cruel of me to 'dangle' you in front of Rolf, knowing he can't have you because of his affliction." Sarah punched a pillow she held up in the air.
"Dangling in front of Rolf. Now that's a delicious thought." She licked her lips. "Dangling aside, that's a decision best left to Rolf and me."
"That's what I told him." Sarah nodded. "I didn't tell him about your wolf."
"It's none of his business." She had five of the ribbons out now. "Now, there in the moonlight, did he confess his undying love?"
"Well, not in so many words." Sarah grimaced. "No."
"But he wants you?"
"Aye. He made that quite clear."
"Then, the inspector must be made to see he can't live without you. He must ask you to marry him," Luci said with conviction.
"Marry me? I don't want to get married!" Sarah bolted straight up.
"Well, dearest, you certainly can't become his lover. So, the man must make a choice: to spend his nights alone, with only his hand to keep him company, or with you in sacred marriage." Luci shrugged her shoulders and picked up her hairbrush. She began brushing her hair with long, slow strokes, working out her now-freed tresses.
"Luci!" Sarah's hand when to her mouth.
"Trust me, dearest. Any sane man will pick marriage. Especially at his age. It's just how to guide him to the proper decision." Luci's eyes narrowed as she tapped her hairbrush against her lips.
"Oh, no, Luci! You're not going to manipulate him into anything. You don't know this man." Sarah shook her head.
"I know men, dearest, and, trust me, they're all alike. They want what they want, and if they can get it without benefit of a priest, they will. But once they come to realize what they crave will be withheld from them, they soon come to appreciate the joys of marriage." Luci put down the brush and flashed one of her wicked grins.
"But I don't want to get married," Sarah protested again, shaking her head.
Luci stood, gathered her ribbons and hairbrush and prepared to leave. "Sarah, do you want him? Is there any other man in the world you'd want to spend the rest of your life with? If he left today, would your world be in ruins?"
Sarah
closed her eyes, opened them, and looked at Luci with resignation. "I want him. There is no other."
"Then marriage it is. Perhaps, Sarah, you should take some time off. Talk to Thatcher. He seems reasonable. Distance makes the heart grow fonder, to say nothing of more desperate." Luci kissed Sarah on the cheek, pulled her wand from her skirts and teleported to her own room.
"Some time away. I could think clearly then." Sarah fell back on the bed and pulled a pillow over her head.
* * * *
Stefan took a sip of the whiskey and felt it burn going down his throat. As its warmth spread through his body, he relaxed into the chair.
"This is good, Rolf." Stefan held up his glass.
"I developed a taste for it in my younger days when I spent most of my time trying to forget my fate." Rolf gave a rueful laugh. "Of course, the swill I drank was very bad, but it was all I could afford, you see. It gave one the most blinding headaches the next day."
"Did you drink to forget your affliction?"
"My curse, you mean. Just say it; it's how I think of it. Yes, after I'd lost everything that mattered to me, what was there to stay sober for?" Rolf looked into the fire, and both men went silent.
Stefan looked around the room. "I've never been here before, other than to stand in the doorway waiting for you. That's quite unusual, Rolf." He pointed to an older style inspector's wand encased in a glass box that hung over the fireplace.
"It was my father's." His voice was soft.
"I had no idea your father was in the patrol and an inspector. He must be very proud of you." Stefan took another sip. A father's pride. There's something he'd never know.
"He was. A twenty-five-year man. He's dead." Rolf leaned back in his chair and rolled his glass between his hands. "My curse killed him years ago, before I came here."
"What do you mean?" Stefan's brow creased. He'd served side-by-side with Rolf for almost ten years, and yet they'd spoken only about work before tonight. Early on, he'd rebuffed Rolf's attempts at friendship, something Stefan couldn't seem to allow himself. Now he reached for some connection with Rolf, some understanding. Was it friendship, perhaps, after all this time?
"He was the only one who stood by me. He helped me hide and kept me safe when I changed. But it became too much for him and he began to sicken."