by Lisa Follett
William stopped in the path where an ivy covered wall brought the gardens to an end, or so she thought. He smiled, took her hand, and led her under an arbor, and past tall bushes. There was part of the wall not laced with plants. He removed a key from his pocket. She realized there was a gate that only a discerning eye would notice.
“I have a surprise for you. He inserted the key and pushed a hidden lever, and opened the gate into a paradise. She gasped at the secret garden; it was wild, untamed, a bit of God’s nature manipulated by man, and seemingly untouched. The space was small, but perfect in every way. She imagined the colors that would bloom when spring came.
“This is amazing! It is so unlike anything I have ever seen. Why is it locked away?”
“I am not sure, except to think the duke and duchess wanted to keep this little bit of heaven to themselves. Would you like to swing?” His eyes twinkled.
“Oh,” Cassie giggled. She lifted her skirts and ran over to the swing attached to the branch of a tree. He followed behind her. When she sat, he touched her back to push her off. His hand burned her back with a touch that turned liquid and pooled in her belly. The cool air snapped against her skin as she swung higher and higher. Their laughter carried in the wind, and she delighted in the sense of freedom. It was a moment that brought back childhood memories. Joy overtook her and made tears sting her eyes.
Cassie swung and they laughed until William caught her by the waist and brought her back down, wrapped his arms around her, and rested his hands on her stomach. The warmth against her back stilled her breathing. He reached down and kissed her along the side of her neck, which caused her skin to tingle. Her breasts heaved, uncommonly heavy and sensitive.
William’s lips trailed along her neck and across her temple. His hands moved up and cupped the underside of her breasts. His touch burned through her redingote and clothes and scorched her bare skin. She caught her breath then leaned back against him.
He took her hand and pulled her to her feet. He twirled her around and hauled her against him. His warm hand grasped the nape of her neck and brought her mouth closer and closer, until their lips were only a breath away. She noticed the clean and woodsy scent of soap and man. Cassie closed her eyes in invitation.
William’s lips captured her mouth in a slow, tantalizing kiss that singed her nerves from her head to her toes. She opened her mouth and he took the opportunity to dive in with his tongue. She met him in a battle of desire and need, Every inch of her throbbed, and cried out for something she thought might be within her grasp, yet could not quite reach it.
She wrapped her arms beneath his coat and around his waist. She touched the small of his back, and was amazed at his strength. She wondered what it would feel like to touch his skin, to feel his skin against hers. The tender tips of her breasts tightened in response to his machinations. She desperately wanted to rub her hardened nipples against his chest. It seemed like such an odd, wanton thing to do, but she could not help herself. She wanted, no, she needed, to feel her naked breasts against his chest.
Eventually he tore away from her, breathless and ragged. Cassie bit her lip. Disappointment gathered in her bosom. She did not want him to stop. She wanted to know what it would be like to be loved him. She wanted tonight.
He led her out of the secret garden, locked the gate behind them, and headed through the winding pathways back to the house. He stopped at one point and observed the low, gray clouds that waited to burst. “Perhaps we should hold our picnic indoors today. It looks like rain on the horizon.”
She stopped and shielded her eyes from the sun with her hand. The wind began to whip her coat and skirts, as the sun hid behind darker clouds. A roll of thunder shook the earth in the distance. A keen sense of regret settled within her bosom. She had looked forward to their ride to see the rest of the estate, and their planned picnic, but nothing could be done about it. She nodded in agreement and they made their way to the house as the first drop of rain touched the tip of her nose.
***
Before the rain came down at a steady pace, William grabbed Cassie’s hand and led her to the house. The rain fell before they made it through the door. He laughed and tugged her damp body into his arms, then crashed his lips down on hers.
Since the moment he first laid eyes on her he wanted her. He could not have her then, but he could have her now. Should he wait until after dinner? Would she feel offended or shy if he took her to his bed now? In the light of the day? He wanted to show her the ways of love, to spend the night exploring every inch of her.
William’s heartbeat accelerated as he took the kiss deeper into the depths of her mouth, until she groaned and wrapped her arms around his shoulders. How fortunate his luck had turned around, giving him this chance to build a life with the woman of his heart. Did he love her? He considered his feelings as he ran his hands up and down his wife’s back. Love. Such an elusive thing, but not impossible. He knew it could happen. It was rare among the ton, but he had grown up watching two people in love make a happy life with each other and their children.
When does one know if he loves another? He knew for certain he loved his family, his parents, his brothers, and his sisters. He would lay his life down for any of them without a second’s hesitation. Would he do the same for his wife?
Yes.
He would give his life for Cassie. Did that mean he loved her? Did he know her well enough to declare his love? Perhaps he was just falling in love, on the edge of a cliff, waiting for the perfect moment to tumble. If he told her he loved her now, he was certain he would scare her away. No. It was too soon. This was not the time.
First he would make love to her and teach her the physical side of love. And he would woo her. He would spend time getting to know her heart and her mind. He only hoped he would recognize when the time was right, when his heart was sure. He pulled his mouth away from her lips and watched the confusion and disappointment pass over her face. The rain changed his plans. He took her hand and led her out of the room and up the stairs.
Scott awaited them at the top of the stairs with a concerned expression on his face. William might have laughed at the man’s stiffness, if the hairs on the back of his neck did not suddenly rise in alarm.
“My lord, you have a visitor.” Scott’s voice sounded troubled.
“Who is it, man?” asked William.
“Mr. Miles Parker.”
Chapter Eight
William stiffened.
Cassie paled.
What could Parker be thinking? They were married less than two days, and he decided to pay a visit. The man must be mad. Cassie started, but William held her in her place. He wanted to grab the interloper by his cravat and throw him out, but he was raised to show a certain amount of decorum while in polite company. He would not act rashly. What would it prove anyway?
“We will go together.” In a possessive gesture, William laid his hand on Cassie’s lower back and led his wife into the drawing room to meet her former betrothed.
Parker stood next to the fireplace with his hands behind his back. His face was a tight mask of controlled anger. He pasted on a fake smile when they entered the room. “My lord, my lady.” He bowed, but his eyes never left Cassie’s face. William kept his hand at her waist and tugged her close.
“Mr. Parker. Whatever are you doing here?” asked Cassie.
William noticed Cassie’s voice trembled, and the tension in her shoulders and defiant stand. Her face lost its’ softness and turned hard as she flashed a brittle smile. He clenched and unclenched his fist, aching for a fight. His wife’s Mr. Parker was more handsome than he had originally imagined.
“I had to see for myself.” He directed a hand towards Cassie. “I came to wish you my felicitations,” Parker nodded.
“Thank you, Mr. Parker.” Cassie replied with her hands in front of her. William noticed the white of her knuckles as she fought to keep control.
“Is that all?” asked William.
“Well, no. Not exac
tly. I mean…I…hoped to have a word with Cassie. Alone.”
“She is Lady William Prescott now. And the answer is no.”
“William, please. I owe him that much,” Cassie pleaded. Everything in him wanted to deny her, to say no, to knock the man flat on his bum. He had ruined her, disgraced her, and now he had the audacity to come here and request a private audience?
“You owe him nothing,” said William between clenched teeth.
“We have left things unsaid. Please, my lord.” Cassie looked at him with such beguiling eyes he turned away. Although this went against his better judgment, perhaps she was right that the affair needed closure.
“Five minutes.” William gave Parker a warning look, then turned and walked out of the room, but he did not go far. He lingered outside of the door in case his wife needed him.
***
“Cassandra.” Mr. Parker came to her and held her shaking hands. She bit down on her lip and tried to keep from spilling tears. “Are you alright? Are you happy?”
“I am fine, Mr. Parker. Why did you come?” she asked. Why, indeed? It would be simpler not to see him again, to put him firmly in the past where he belonged.
“I was shocked when I read about your marriage in the paper, so sudden, and only a few days after…after we broke off.”
Cassie pulled her hands away and walked over to the window. She watched raindrops splatter against the glass and fall into long rivulets like tiny streams in search of their final destination. How could she explain? She could tell him how the disgrace hurt her family, how it ruined Jocelyn’s chances for a good match, but in truth, how she wanted to marry William. The moment she learned of her husband’s offer she experienced a sense of relief, of elation, of wonder.
“My parents were sending me away to live my great-aunt in Yorkshire. I could abide my punishment, my disgrace, but dear Jocelyn did not deserve the backlash of my actions. Lord William offered me the chance to right my wrongs…to end the scandal, and to keep my family and I from ruin. And suffering anymore embarrassment.” She turned to face Mr. Parker. His look was hard, unforgiving.
“We could have married. You did not have to return home in disgrace, Cassandra.” He stepped towards her, but she stepped back, forcing distance between them.
“We have already been over this, Mr. Parker. I could not allow you to sacrifice your inheritance, your only means of support. You should have considered your mother and sisters. You would have come to resent me, and that is something I could not bear.”
“Is he good to you Cassie?”
“He has been nothing but kindness. I could not have asked for more.” She said nothing but the truth. Cassie looked at Mr. Parker in his yellow canary coat and green pants. Something shifted inside of her. His wardrobe always amused her so, but now he appeared silly and brass. Oh, he owned a piece of her heart, but something had changed; in him, and in her, as well as in everything else.
“He will never love you like I do, and I am certain you will never love him. We were destined, Cassandra. You and I should be husband and wife right now.”
Cassie’s breath caught on his words. Would William love her? And what about her feelings towards her husband? She enjoyed his company, and craved his touch. But could she love William? She looked at Mr. Parker and felt her heart wrench in two. His familiar face had kept her company in her dreams for so long, but now, even as he stood before her, he began to fade away.
She realized she wanted him to leave; needed him to go. She was amidst a fog, where two men swirled around her, pulling on her from each side like a child’s game of tug-of-war. Tears pricked her eyes. Could she love two men at once?
“What is done is done. I am Lord William’s wife now. It is over. Please, Mr. Parker, please go.” Cassie met his eyes. She saw a hardness there, a coldness she never noticed before. He bowed and quit the room, quit the house, quit her.
She sank down on the couch and choked on a sob. William rushed into the room to her side, but when she looked up at him, his face was distorted in compassion and fury.
Cassie stood. “I am fine except for a headache. I think I shall rest awhile.” She walked past him, shoulders stiff and erect, back straight, chin up. She felt like a little soldier called into battle, except in her case, it was the battle of her heart and mind.
Cassie made it up the stairs. Her knees threatened to give out before she could fling herself on the bed. She allowed the sobs to crest and flow. She cried for a life that might have been. She cried for her near ruin and momentary disgrace. She cried for relief, for what she had now, and for what she hoped to hang onto. Finally spent, she fell into a deep, dreamless sleep.
***
William stormed into his study and slammed the door behind him. His fist itched to rearrange the dandy’s face. First, Parker charms Cassie into leaving with him in the night, then brought her home unmarried and ruined, and now he dares to show his face at Rosehill Manor. What Cassie could have seen in the man he could not understand, but her eyes spoke volumes. His wife loved another man.
Damn! He was a fool who allowed his cock to lead his head. He wanted her with every fiber of his being, and he thought, over time they might grow to love each other, and build the kind of lasting relationship his parents had. He strangled himself with his own mistake.
The moment he heard of Cassie’s dilemma, he charged off like a knight in shining armor to rescue his damsel in distress. He poured himself a glass of brandy, downed its contents, and smashed the crystal against the stone fireplace. Sinking into a chair, he rubbed his face with his hands, embarrassed at his own foolishness.
Her face flooded his mind and he envisioned her green eyes, pert nose, and lush lips. He imagined her golden hair, and thought about how much he looked forward to removing her pins and running her hair through his fingers. Her sweet laughter rose up and rang in his ears. He wanted to embrace her, hold onto her, and never let her go.
“She is mine.” The words fell from his lips in a desperate whisper. By the laws of England, he owned Cassie, possessed her as one owned land or a house or a trinket, but her heart, her mind, her soul, belonged to someone else.
He leaned back in the chair, his head cushioned against the leather, and closed his eyes to his torment. Things were going so well between them. Granted their marriage had yet to be consummated, but he had plans for tonight, to take her loveliness and make her his own. They shared similar values, ideals, and comfortable conversation. There was a contented ease in their budding relationship. His heart twisted and plummeted to his stomach.
He wanted her and needed her like a starving man needed food and water, like someone desperate for a breath of fresh air. He could choose to fight for her heart, or turn his back on all he ever wanted, and live in a loveless marriage of convenience.
William sat in his chair for what seemed like hours as he contemplated his future with his bride. He would not let that little weasel of a man stand between him and his wife. He would not share Cassie’s body, heart, or mind with another. He would continue his original plan. Tonight, his wife would be his in every sense of the word.
***
Cassie turned and stretched before opening her eyes and remembering the day’s events. William and Mr. Parker flooded her mind like a carriage trapped in a raging river. She started to sit up, but fell back onto the bed. Her were eyes dry, and her body was weak from the turbulent emotions. She stared up at the peach canopy. How could she face her husband?
She ran through their pleasant morning: their tour of the house, their walk in the gardens, and the wildness of the secret patch of earth behind the hidden gate. She loved how the wind whipped across her face as he swung her in the air, and she recalled how their laughter merged into one sound. The happiness they shared in those moments could not be compared to any other moments of her life. She had never known such abandoned joy. And his kisses. Oh heavens!
Cassie’s body melted in a storm of fiery sensations at the very thought of William kissing and to
uching her. Although she was somewhat nervous, a bit unsure of the unknown, she looked forward to becoming his wife in every way. Her skin tingled with anticipated pleasure. She only prayed he would come to her tonight.
He seemed so angry earlier. Furious. Mr. Parker’s timing could not have been worse. Another man who was angry at her. Well, it could not be helped. She sighed. The guilt she amassed for rushing into marriage with William after her run to Gretna Green resulted in such dismal failure. She had no choice really. She could not allow her family to suffer for her indiscretions. William gave her another chance, an opportunity to rectify the situation, and in truth, after sharing sinful kisses with the man, she could not help but want more.
She heard a small knock at the door before it opened. “Beg pardon, my lady, but it is nearly dinner time.”
Cassie sat up and threw her legs over the edge of the bed. It was time to face her husband. She washed up and changed into a pink muslin gown. Katie worked miracles with her tangled hair, and after a quick survey of herself in the mirror, she deemed herself presentable. She gathered her wits about her, put starch in her back, and made her way to the dining room.
William, his face reserved and his eyes shuttered, stood when she entered. She tried to smile, but managed only a slight lift of her trembling lips.
“Good evening, my lady.”
“Good evening to you, my lord.” They both paused as the footman placed their soup in front of them. William did not waste time on pleasantries, instead, he picked up his spoon and focused on his meal. She did the same.
The silent air in the room crackled like the fire in the hearth. The tiniest sounds of silver clanged against the china and echoed in her ears. Tension mounted in her shoulders with each spoonful of soup.
The lack of even the most basic conversation put her nerves on edge. She started more than once to engage in polite conversation, but he only managed a nod, grunt, or syllable.
She could not stand to spend a lifetime of meals in unbearable silence. He knew of her circumstances when he proposed to her. Surely he could not blame her for Mr. Parker’s unexpected visit. The entire matter left her distraught. If only Mr. Parker had let her be.