Wishes to Burn

by Ellabee Andrews

  I stiffen when she mentions me being with one of the others, but not because the idea is unappealing. No, looking over my shoulder at the three handsome guys that stand there, all willing to help whenever I ask, I know that it has nothing to do with any resistance to sleeping with them, and everything to do with not being able to pick one. Up to this point, the times I’ve slept with one has been spontaneous, and the thought of choosing, then telling them that I want too… well, it is uncharted territory for me.

  “Hey, don’t look so afraid. You don’t have to do that. I’m sorry I suggested it, Rhia. It was stupid of me, and I…”

  Satine trails off when I swivel my head back around to face her fully, and I raise a brow at her in confusion. “I’m not upset because you suggested it, Satine… I’m just…I don’t know who to ask,” I finally blurt, and she quirks an eyebrow at me.

  “Well, seeing as they all have supernatural hearing, I’m assuming you won’t really need to bring the subject up. More like, just say who you decide on. Either way, do you think we can go ahead and get in the vehicle? I’m exhausted, and unlike some fancy pants fairy, I don’t have a magic umbrella to keep me warm and cozy.”

  Glancing at said ‘fancy pants fairy,' I find Fifi focusing entirely too hard on her nails, shifting the colors and patterns while looking way too innocent to not have overheard our conversation. At the mention of her though, she turns and with a wink, we're all dry and sporting our own magic umbrellas. "Ask and you shall receive sugar. It's part of the gig," she says, walking over to the downed men, and with each sway of her wand, I notice that they all seem to be put back to how they were before they attacked us.

  “What did you do?” the man with the broken hand asks, as he reaches down and grabs his wounded wrist, but as he twists and turns it, it no longer appears hurt.

  “Oh, honey, I didn’t do anything. I was just offering you a hand up off the ground. You and your friends hit your head awfully hard, and I wanted to check that you were okay before leaving. You should get going though, the rain doesn’t seem to be easing up anytime soon. Now, y’all get on out of here.”

  “Yea… okay, but don’t touch me. I can take care of myself,” the man with the now healed hand says, ignoring Fifi’s attempt to help him stand.

  I watch on in bewilderment as Fifi continues to offer a hand to each of the downed gentleman, and despite their refusal, she never falters from her kindness. Once they’ve each risen, all three still appearing confused about what had transpired, they turn and head deeper into the almost deserted parking lot.

  “What did you do?” Maksim asks, and I lean back into his heat as he moves in close behind me. I still have Satine cradled in my arms, so it leaves me sandwiched between the two. It’s a feeling I don’t mind at all.

  Smiling beatifically, Fifi gives Maksim a saucy wink. “I did my job, of course. Remembering that they were schooled by all of this fabulousness would have just caused problems for them, and us, since we aren’t leaving right away. Plus, I don’t feel like explaining to Cresseda why I allowed you to fight with humans, regardless of it not being your fault.”

  “I get that, but damn, I wish they remembered at least a little of it. Like, a phantom pain. Those assholes shouldn’t get off scot free,” Gavril says, and I silently agree.

  “Oh, did I say I removed everything? How silly of me. No, they may not remember this fight, but they will forever have an aversion to picking fights with women or trying to hurt those that they don't think are normal. If they do, well…. Let's just say that there will be consequences…"

  Too curious not to ask, especially with the wicked gleam in her eyes, I wait until she finishes speaking before clearing my throat, arms growing tired from holding some of Satine’s weight. “What consequences, Fifi? And how does that work with you being The Fairy Godmother?”

  "Oh, easy, honey. You see, I help those that need help. And those three absolutely do. If they keep acting on their hate and trying to hurt others, it will lead them down a bad path. So now they'll at least think twice before they do. And as far as consequences go… let me put it this way. If they pull another stunt like they did tonight, then the next time they go to have sex, it will be like trying to hit a dartboard with a limp noodle. The impotence will only last for twenty-four hours after the incident, but every time they mess up like that, they will have to deal with twenty-fours of Gumby dick. Or, since this is the country, maybe I should call it limp biscuit.

  A laugh bursts from my lips at the visual image, and it isn’t long before the others join in, the rain swallowing up the sound. We’re still chuckling as we all pile back into the new rental SUV, and begin to make our drive back to the house.

  The mood may have improved, but with Satine snoring lightly with her head in my lap, I stroke her hair and stare out the window as the trees blur by. She needs the energy of sex, and I’m able to give that to her. But with who?

  Looking around at all the amazing guys who sit near me, I have no idea how I’ll choose.

  Wishing On A Star

  The rain has tapered off by the time we arrive back at the old farmhouse, but the roiling of my emotions are just as strong as they were at the festival. The silent ride hadn’t helped, and as I watch Maksim carry a sleeping Satine into the house, I know that I need to decide something soon.

  “Rhia?”

  I look up from the rock I’ve been staring at for the last minute or so, and see that everyone has already gone inside except for Fifi, who is sitting on the porch, watching me. Patting the spot next to her, I move toward her with a sigh, the damp grass squishing beneath my boots.

  "What's up, Fifi?"

  “I was going to ask you the same. Why are you hesitating? I know how you feel about those three boys. And you know they care for you too. Why stall now?”

  The question is simple to ask, but not so easy to explain. But I try my best. “I care for them all, Fifi. And that’s the problem. If I ask one to spend the night with me, do they think I’m only doing it because Satine needs it? What if I hurt one of the others by not asking them? I just… The answer doesn’t seem really clear right now.”

  Talking to Fifi is easy, like she'll never pass judgment on me or my feelings, and for a second, all is quiet as we sit and stare off. Finally moving, Fifi turns at the waist to look at me.

  “That is a tough decision to make. And, as much as you don’t want to hear it, this is most likely a situation you’ll face again in the future. The path you’ve chosen won’t be easy, but I have a feeling that despite how hard it may be, you’re in for one helluva ride. I do have a suggestion though… since you’re so worried you’ll hurt someone.”

  She has my full attention now, and I turn so that I make eye contact, barely restraining the urge to shake her for answers. “Well?” I ask, finally growing too impatient, and she lifts a perfectly styled brow at me.

  “You all share a bond, honey. No words are really needed for the five of you. What you share through that bond will probably express your fears and desires better than any words ever could. Use it. Let them in fully and share your burden. I know that you all have already come a long way, but trust them to be there for you. To help you.”

  With a small pat to my head, Fifi stands and goes to walk away, before stopping and facing me again. “And before I forget, honey, you need to get your braids redone.”

  Planting my face in my hands as Fifi walks into the house, the screen door shutting softly behind her, I can’t help but shake my head. Leave it to Fifi to point out messy braids at a time like this.

  I decide to take Fifi’s advice, to allow the others to share in my concerns and hope that one of them will have a good solution.

  I do this by walking over and sitting on one of the lawn chairs that are arranged beside the house. They’re wet, but after the day I’ve had, I don’t mind.

  Opening up my mind, I immediately find the lines that connect me with others, and I follow along three of those tethers, leaving the one that flows to S
atine alone. It doesn’t shine as brightly in my mind as the others, and it’s easy to guess it’s because of how weak she is right now.

  Putting that worry aside, for now, I focus back on tracing down the tethers of the guys and placing a metaphysical knock against their barriers. It's not the best explanation for the sensation, but it's the only way I know how to describe it.

  I know the moment each of them become aware of my presence, their shields dropping causing me to feel a level of comfort that I hadn’t had at first, but have grown to appreciate, and it’s Gavril that calls out to me first.

  “Rhia? Is everything okay?” he asks.

  I shrug my shoulders, and then immediately feel stupid for doing so, since he’s not out here to see it. Instead, I focus back on our link.

  “Yeah, I’m okay. Are Declan and Maksim listening?” I ask.

  “Present, though I’m not sure what we’re supposed to be doing. I didn’t know we were practicing tonight,” Declan replies.

  “I’m here, Rhia. Why are you still outside?” Maksim questions and I know that time is running short for me to say and do what I need to do before one of them comes out here to join me.

  Taking one last deep breath for strength, I close my eyes and focus on what I need them to see.

  I try to convey through the images that I show them, that they all mean a lot to me. I allow them a brief glimpse into my mind and lay the cards out on the table. To Gavril, I show how his unwavering loyalty makes me feel secure. To Declan, I express how his humor has helped me through many hard days. And to Maksim, I allow him to see that his strength makes me feel safe in a way I've never thought possible.

  I push those thoughts and feelings out there where they hang between us, and then I show them Satine, and how she has become my rock. The person I can talk to about anything.

  With Satine present in my mind, I then allow them to feel how worried I am for her and push my intent out there. Of knowing what I need to do to help her, but afraid that whatever choice I make will only hurt someone.

  I leave them with one last thought. One last question.

  “She needs energy, and I can give her that. We can give her that, but the idea of choosing one of you to be with, to create the energy she needs with, is too hard. There’s no choice for me. Not really, so I’m leaving it up to you.

  “You can think I’m a coward because I already do, but on this, I won’t change my mind. I care deeply for all three of you and won’t risk hurting anyone by my choice. So you have to decide for me.

  “If you are all really in this, with me, and care about making it work, then I need one of you to join me outside. You have to work it out between yourselves though, because I’ve tried to think of a better solution since we left the festival, and I’m drawing blanks here.

  "It's time for you three to prove that we can make this work. Figure out who is coming out here. Who I'm spending the night with because I can't. I understand if this is too much to ask, and I won't hold it against you if no one comes out, but I had to try."

  I shut down the link after that last thought, slamming my shields in place against the surprise I feel coming through the lines, and lean back and look at the night sky. It may take them some time to discuss this, so I make myself comfortable, the knot of nerves sitting like a stone within me as I fight to keep my breathing steady. Now they know how I’m feeling, I just have to wait and see how they feel too.

  As the minutes tick by and no one shows, I only grow more anxious. My palms start sweating and I bring my knees up to my chest to wrap my arms around them as I try to think of anything besides them all deciding it’s too much work to stick around. I had tried to avoid hurting anyone, and in turn, I’ve either hurt or angered them all, and the worst part is that I have no idea how to even go about fixing it. I thought sharing how I felt would help, would make them see how deep my feelings for them went, but with the seconds passing by, I can see that for the naïve mistake that it is.

  I lay my forehead on my knees and close my eyes tight against the world. I can’t clear my mind, so I try to wish this whole day away. I could always ask Fifi to do it, but knowing her, she’d probably tell me to suck it up then take me shopping. Giggling to myself at the thought, I don’t hear anyone approach and startle so bad at a touch to my shoulder that I jump from the chair. My feet slip across the slick grass, and as the ground rushes up to meet my face, I don’t even have time to throw up my arms before I’m suddenly stopped, and then brought up into a warm hug.

  I’d know his heat and smell anywhere, and I lose myself in the sensation of having Maksim’s strong arms wrapped around me. “I’ve got you,” he murmurs into my ear, and the tears I’ve been fighting back silently slide down my cheeks, disappearing into the cotton of his grey shirt.

  “I… I didn’t think anyone was coming. I thought I had run you all off,” I admit, voice shaky.

  A rumble in Maksim’s chest has me pulling my face back, as I realize he’s laughing, and my tears dry up as irritation flares. I narrow my eyes on his face.

  "Sorry, Rhia. I thought you were joking for a second," he says and squeezes me tighter when my eyes narrow further. "I'm not making fun of you. It's just, the thought that me or any of us could run away from you is unfathomable. Don't you know? We're crazy about you," he adds, and my pulse picks up as my heart begins to pound against my chest.

  “You are?” I say, voice more uncertain than it ever has been with Maksim, and he leans forward and rests his forehead against mine.

  “Yes, Rhia. I am. You consume my thoughts, and whether I like it or not, the others care deeply for you too. I would have been out here sooner, but me and the others had to have a talk…”

  As he trails off, my heart thumps for a different reason and I glance back at the house, not seeing the others anywhere. “Uh, Maks?” I ask, voice dry.

  “Hmmm?” he says, as he continues to lean against me.

  “When you say talk… you don’t mean that you killed them, right?” I ask, only half joking, and another rumble of laughter bubbles from his lips.

  “Not quite, Rhia. I may have threatened to maim, but no killing. But in all seriousness, we did have a talk, and even though it’s not the situation any of us would have chosen, we care too much to not at least try.”

  My breath leaves me in a sigh as I wrap myself in tighter against Maksim, his words leaving me with a deep sense of relief as he holds me.

  "But," he says, and my body tenses as I realize that things can't be that easy. Raising his head, and using his big hand to lift my chin, I meet his piercing gaze. "When you're with me. You're only with me. I can share your time, but only if I know that it's me you're thinking of when we're alone together. I'm afraid that any other way and my control won't be able to hold."

  I scan his face and know that he's right. He's come a long way in learning to keep control of his shift, and this is a small request to make.

  Standing up on my tiptoes, I stop my lips when they’re just a hair's breadth away. “Only you,” I breathe, my lips caressing his when I speak, and after a brief pause, he crushes his lips against mine, his long arms reaching down and cupping my ass as he lifts me into his arms.

  I instinctively curl my legs around his waist, and as he walks back toward the house, he doesn’t even break our kiss. The others must know that we’re coming, because when we reach the door, I look up and around, but the house appears empty as we walk down the hallway.

  At his door, he looks down one last time, eyes running over my face, and when I don’t tell him to stop or to put me down, he turns the knob with one hand and walks through the door, allowing it to softly click shut behind us.

  Some Like It Hot

  Despite the fires I see burning in his gaze, Maksim takes his time with walking over to the bed, taking care to lay me down softly as not to crush my wings. The whole time he does this, he keeps eye contact, never allowing me to look away from the eyes that seem more amber in the dim lighting of his room, and I wouldn
’t want to anyway. Not with my heart pounding in my chest as desire and nervousness swirl inside of me.

  “Don’t be afraid, Rhia. I’ll only ever take care of you,” Maksim says, and I check my mental shields to make sure I’m not broadcasting my thoughts to him.

  Finding them solidly closed, I tilt my head as my eyes trace down his handsome face. “How do you do that?”

  “What?” he asks, seeming confused by the question.

  “How do you always seem to know what I’m thinking or feeling. Is it the bond? I thought I was blocking you,” I admit, tired of keeping things inside.

  Surprising me with his small smile, the sides of his mouth barely curling up, he cups my cheek with one large, very warm hand. “It has nothing to do with your shields, Rhia. I don’t have to read your mind to know what you’re thinking because I know you. I’ve memorized the lines of your face, and have dreamed about the curves of your body. Even when you’re away from me, you’re always in my thoughts, and I’ll admit, being with you, caring for you, comes as easy as breathing to me. You’re a part of me now.”

  My breath hitches at his admission, and moisture rises in my eyes at how open he’s being with me. It’s a side of him that I don’t see often, and I cherish this moment for the gift that it is.

  “Thank you for caring that much, Maks. I don’t know what I’ve done to deserve it, but thank you.” My words are slightly choked as they come out, and I go to rub my eyes, feeling foolish at the tears building within them.

  Maksim stops my hand before I can, and instead leans in and kisses them away.

  I thread my hands through his hair as he moves, and once he pulls back far enough to capture my mouth with his own, his kisses burn as he claims me with a searing kiss.