by Sue MacKay
‘Mitch,’ she croaked.
His steady gaze fixed her to the spot. ‘Thought you’d like to know that I’ve found out I can donate a kidney to Jamie.’
All the air in her lungs hissed out over her lips as she collapsed in on herself. Squeezing her eyes shut, she tried to exorcise that image of Mitch as he told her what she’d wanted to hear for weeks. But she couldn’t get his face out of her head. His totally emotionless expression pressed at her.
A kidney for Jamie. From his father. And she hadn’t even known he was getting the tests done. Because he’d wanted to find out first? Whichever way it went?
Jodi sank to the floor, her legs unable to hold her upright. She wanted the ground to open up and swallow her for ever. Mitch was doing the most generous thing possible for his son. And she’d been ranting and raving at him for coming home late. When had she become such a witch? Had Jamie’s illness taken over every part of her so that she was the single-minded person she’d accused Mitch of being?
Dragging her head up, she met Mitch’s steady gaze. ‘I am so sorry, Mitch. I didn’t think, didn’t consider you might have another reason for not coming home as you’d promised. I’m so sorry,’ she repeated.
‘We have an appointment with Lucas at eleven tomorrow to discuss what we’re doing next, when we might schedule the operations. I’ll see you there. In the meantime, I have a job to get back to.’
As Mitch turned away, Jodi noticed a bottle of champagne in his hand. She gasped. Never, ever had she got something so wrong. And the consequences were huge.
She’d just lost the only man she’d ever loved, still loved. Again.
*
At five to eleven the next morning Jodi was pacing the general waiting room outside the surgical consultants’ rooms. Every time the swing doors opened she looked up expectantly. When a stranger walked though her stomach dropped, and she went back to pacing.
Jamie sat sprawled sideways in the wheelchair Mitch had arranged for him, half-asleep, his blankie tucked around him. Since learning he had to go to see the doctor today he’d been grizzly but his lethargy had finally quietened him.
Eleven o’clock clicked over to one minute past on the wall clock. Where was Mitch? And Lucas? According to Lucas’s nurse, he hadn’t arrived on the floor yet.
She wouldn’t even begin to think anything other than that Mitch would be here as soon as he could get away from his department. And that he’d put Jamie first unless it was absolutely imperative for a patient that he stay in the ED.
The doors swung wide and Lucas marched in, Mitch at his side looking quite cool and calm in his perfect suit with matching shirt and tie.
‘Hey, sport.’ Mitch crouched down by Jamie. ‘How’s my boy?’
‘I want to go home.’
‘As soon as we’ve talked with Dr Lucas, okay?’
Jodi’s heart twisted at the love for Jamie emanating from Mitch’s face. He had taken this whole situation from a place of shock and horror to something vibrant and caring. How had Mitch done it? It must’ve taken a massive amount of courage.
‘Morning, Mitch,’ she said quietly.
‘Morning, Jodi.’ He dipped his head abruptly in her direction before pushing Jamie’s chair after Lucas. ‘Let’s get this under way.’
‘Daddy, I don’t want to see that man.’
What? Now? Shock slammed Jodi and she stumbled.
Mitch gaped at Jamie, then leaned down and brushed the hair out of Jamie’s eyes with the gentlest of movements. A quick glance at her showed shock and delight mingled in his beautiful blue eyes. Then he straightened up and continued pushing Jamie towards Lucas’s office.
Jodi followed in a daze. Jamie had called Mitch Daddy for the first time. Why today, of all days? He’d had days to start saying Daddy and until now she’d not heard the slightest acknowledgement from Jamie that he understood Mitch’s special place in his life.
Lucas let Mitch push the wheelchair through to his office before turning to Jodi. ‘Are you all right, Jodi?’
‘Of course. Jamie’s got a very real chance now.’
Lucas caught her elbow to stop her moving forward. ‘I don’t know anything about the situation between you and Mitch other than you haven’t had a relationship for a few years.’
‘That’s true.’ If you didn’t count the recent mind-blowing sex. Or that they were sharing his house. Make that had been until last night. Mitch must’ve slept over here because he hadn’t come home at all during the night.
Lucas jiggled her arm. ‘I’m probably speaking out of turn—no, I am definitely interfering—but it’s important. Please give Mitch some space while he works through this. It’s a huge undertaking to donate an organ and while he’s willing to do it there are going to be moments when he’ll wonder if he’s going to be all right afterwards.’
‘I understand.’ It was great that Mitch had Lucas batting for him. And a shame that he thought she’d be impatient with Mitch while they got everything under way.
‘And, Jodi…’ Lucas paused and locked eyes with her. ‘I’m thrilled for you and Jamie. There’s sunshine coming for you. Now, let’s get this show on the road.’
It was the first ever medical discussion about Jamie that Jodi sat through without saying a word unless asked a direct question.
She listened carefully as Lucas explained that Mitch would have some sessions with a counsellor before he signed the paperwork required. They discussed how long all this would take, but Lucas hoped to fast-track the last few ends that needed tying up.
‘Then,’ Lucas added, ‘before you get totally excited, there’s one final round of blood tests to be done before we go to Theatre. More often than not we don’t find any problems at that stage. We’ll have covered all the bases in the previous tests.’
Jamie grizzled as Lucas checked him over once more but with Mitch making faces at him and Lucas talking softly Jamie was soon smiling.
Jodi felt estranged from them all. Like she was in a vacuum. She’d got what she’d come to Auckland for: help to save Jamie’s life. More specifically she’d got Mitch to offer his kidney. And yet it was as though she’d made a terrible mistake. Not for getting Jamie what he needed—hell, she’d even got him a father. But she’d lost Mitch. Really lost him for good this time. And there was only one person to blame. Herself.
The appointment seemed interminable but at last she was standing and pushing Jamie’s wheelchair out of the small room. Mitch held the swing door open for her. He walked beside her down the long corridor to the lift. He pressed the buttons for the floors they both required. At level one he stepped out the moment the doors slid open.
Jodi watched his stiff gait, saw his hands clenching at his sides, and reached out to him with her hand. ‘Mitch.’
He stopped, turned to face her. ‘Yes?’
Whatever she’d been about to say froze in the chill pouring off him. Her mouth dried, her tongue stuck to the roof of her mouth. Her arm dropped to her side, effectively letting the doors close and the lift continue its downward journey. Down to the underground car park where she’d left Mitch’s vehicle in his reserved slot.
Strapping Jamie in to his seat, she proceeded to take them back to Mitch’s house, where Mitch’s cleaning lady had country music blaring and the laundry flapping in the winter wind.
Inside the house she tucked Jamie into bed in Mitch’s spare room and went to make a strong coffee with beans she’d bought the other day—one of the few things she’d contributed, and that had been more about her than Mitch.
Claire filled another mug and joined her in the dining room, where weak sunlight cut through the windows to create a semblance of warmth. Not that it reached the cold rock that was Jodi’s heart.
‘Hey.’ Claire dropped heavily into a deep armchair, miraculously not spilling a drop of her coffee. ‘You look pooped.’
That was putting it mildly. ‘Try blind with lack of sleep.’ The lethally strong coffee hit her stomach, sent her caffeine-craving senses into raptures. And set t
he drums in her head beating again.
‘Mitch’s starting to look a bit like you these days. Like you’re both space trekking.’ Claire sipped her well-milked coffee and winced. Her focus appeared to be on the small spider’s web in the corner of the room. ‘I used to think he ran on empty all the time and still managed to come up looking fabulous. But not anymore. When I saw him yesterday he looked like crap.’
Rub it in, why don’t you? ‘I’d say it’s the worry about Jamie that’s doing that.’
‘You’re probably right. He’s used to working all those hours and dealing with everyone else’s emergencies, not his own.’
Jodi stared at the woman. Had she been talking to Lucas by any chance? Of course she hadn’t. But two similar messages in one morning? Didn’t they get it? She knew she’d messed up big time. What she didn’t know was how to fix it. None of them had any answers there. ‘It’s not the same looking after someone who’s a patient as it is looking after your own child.’
Claire changed the subject. Slightly. ‘Fancy Mitch having a twin brother. It freaked me when you called him Max. I thought you were having me on.’
‘That happened a lot at med school.’
‘Did you ever make a mistake?’ Claire grinned. ‘Ever think you were with Mitch when it was actually Max?’
‘Not once. I know the difference between Mitch and Max.’ Max, who only the other day had told her she was strong. Because she fought for her son. So why wasn’t she fighting for Mitch?
The phone in the kitchen rang. ‘For you,’ Claire said moments later. ‘It’s Mitch.’
Mitch was phoning her? Her heart rate lifted. ‘Hi, Mitch. That was a positive meeting with Lucas.’
‘I’m calling to inform you I’m flying to Sydney on Friday for two days. I’ll email you my contact details so that you can reach me if something happens with Jamie.’
Sydney and his prestigious job. Of course. How silly of her to forget that.
*
Mitch dropped his phone on his desk and ran his hands over his stubbly chin. ‘Going to the pack, boyo.’
‘Talking to yourself now.’ Aaron stood in the doorway.
‘Come in and take a pew.’ Mitch waved at him. ‘You sure this is all right? Me disappearing for a couple of days?’
‘No worries.’ Aaron turned the chair around and straddled it. ‘How’d the meeting go with the boss?’
The big boss. ‘It’s going to work out just fine.’ For who? Him? Jamie? Or Jodi?
‘Good. I like what you’re doing. For purely selfish reasons, of course.’ Aaron talked shop for a bit then stood up. ‘Coming to the farewell bash the TV crew are putting on? It looks impressive. Probably because they overstayed their welcome by a week.’
‘I guess I’m expected to. At least that’s one thing done and dusted.’ Thankfully Carl had seen reason and stopped harassing him about doing a clip on Jamie.
‘Then shift your butt. Kick-off is in thirty minutes. You could do with some spit and polish before then. Can’t have the HOD turning up looking like something the dog chewed. They’d probably film you just for the hell of it.’
Mitch rolled his eyes. ‘Bloody chirpy, aren’t you?’
‘Got what I want, didn’t I?’
Mitch flapped a hand at his colleague, and the guy who’d become a good friend. ‘Get out of here. I’ll see you shortly.’
‘I’ll come looking for you if you’re late.’
‘Getting far too clever for your own good, Dr Simmonds,’ he called at Aaron’s rapidly disappearing back.
Aaron flipped him the bird and continued down the corridor.
Mitch unfolded himself from his chair and stretched his back, easing the kinks in his spine. Jamming his hands into his trouser pockets, he crossed to the window to stare out at the busy street below. End-of-day rush hour traffic queued for lights, going nowhere in a hurry.
Last thing Friday he’d fly to Sydney. A quick trip. If everything went to plan he might even make a flight back late the next day. The thought of being out of the country when Jamie could take a turn for the worse worried him more than anything. But he had to go. No way around it. Not and keep his reputation from being ripped to shreds.
‘What does your rep matter if you don’t have the two most important people back in your life?’
He’d worked too hard to let it go easily, even if it wasn’t the most important aspect of his life anymore.
He muttered to himself, ‘You’re working at keeping Jodi and Jamie around for long? Or just until the operation is over and done with?’
No, that was only the beginning of everything. Jamie would be well, able to do all the things little boys did. The kid would have a future, a long future. He’d be able to grow up and decide what he wanted to be as an adult.
‘There’ll always be the side effects of anti-rejection drugs.’ He continued his monologue.
A small price to pay for Jamie’s life. As long as someone explained it all to him thoroughly and often. Mitch pinched his lips together.
‘That’s my role. Among others.’ From now on, Jamie had a dad. A father who was never going to leave him to grow up with another male figure. A father who’d put his child first, over everything else.
‘And Jodi?’
Yeah, well. Lots of work to do there. Did he even want to try? Risk not being believed, not being listened to and actually heard?
Jodi had cut him right through to his heart with her accusations about not coming home when he’d said he would. It wasn’t that she’d made a mistake that got to him. It was that she hadn’t given him the opportunity to explain first. Neither had she believed he might’ve changed.
Hell, when it came to Jamie he’d got up to speed in a very short time. Accepting that Jamie was his. No questions asked. Okay, not many. After the initial shock he’d had no doubt that the boy was his.
And he’d put his kidney on notice for Jamie. Which was what Jodi had wanted all along. What was a guy supposed to do? Beg forgiveness for an argument that was three years old?
Whether Jodi noticed or not, he had changed. Was still changing. He was making plans for the future that involved all of them. Those plans would continue.
CHAPTER TWELVE
JODI’S CELLPHONE VIBRATED on her hip, waking her from a doze. Tugging it free, she read ‘Mitch calling’ and flicked the phone open.
Exhaling a deep breath, she said, ‘Hello. You got my text?’ In her worried frame of mind she’d feared it mightn’t have reached Mitch in Sydney.
‘How bad is he?’ Blunt and to the point. No change there.
Jodi glanced at Jamie lying with tubes seemingly coming out of every aperture he had, and then some. The white hospital sheets made him look paler than he already was. ‘He’s got a fever, higher temperature than last time we were here. He’s been on dialysis all day and it doesn’t look like Lucas will stop that for a while yet. Basically he’s getting worse and there’s no stopping it.’ She knew the despair in her voice would reach him and that made her feel guilty. But she couldn’t help it.
‘Hang in there, Jodi. Everything will work out. I promise.’
How can he promise that? ‘Sure.’
‘I’ll get home as soon as possible.’
‘Mitch, wait. Do what you have to do. Getting back a day earlier isn’t going to change anything here.’ Except give me the strength and courage to carry on watching over my boy.
‘I want to be with Jamie. And you. I’m missing you both.’
Really? Missing me? Mitch had said that? ‘Um, great. Looking forward to your arrival.’ I’ll be counting the hours, except I haven’t a clue what flight you’re booked on. ‘What time tomorrow do you get in?’
The dial tone answered her. He’d hung up. Right. Okay. Now what? Mitch was heading home to Jamie—and her. Did that mean he’d give her a chance to apologise properly? Would he give her a second chance?
She hoped so because she had news for Mitch. Once Jamie had his transplant and had recovered
, they were moving to Sydney, too. If possible she’d find a flat near Mitch so he could spend lots of time with Jamie. She’d get work at a local medical centre. And they could both take active parts in raising their son.
*
‘Go to the on-call room and get some decent sleep.’
For a moment Jodi thought Mitch had got back early. She lifted her head and blinked in the half-light of a ward full of sleeping patients. ‘Max?’ In her dazed state his deep voice had sounded so like his brother’s. ‘What are you doing here?’
‘I heard Jamie had been readmitted.’
‘So you wanted to check up on him?’ Cool. Max couldn’t deny he was an uncle. All the right instincts seemed to have kicked in.
‘Seriously, go and grab something for dinner, then put your head down for a while. I’ll sit with Jamie until Lucas finishes surgery, which should be by eight o’clock.’
‘What has Lucas and surgery got to do with Jamie?’ Had she missed something here?
‘Lucas says you need a break and there’s no one else to sit with Jamie so he’s coming as soon as he can.’
Huh? Mr Lucas Harrington was going to sit with her boy for a few hours? ‘Heck. He doesn’t have to do that.’ She studied Max. ‘Neither do you.’
‘Can’t have people thinking Maitlands are no good at looking out for their own. Jamie’s my family, too.’ He gave her an eloquent shrug. ‘I know that much.’
Cool. But—
‘You look whacked. Don’t want Mitch seeing you like this.’ Max sat on the end of the bed and reached to brush her hair out of her eyes. ‘Do you trust me with Jamie?’
‘Why wouldn’t I?’
‘Then why are you still here?’
*
The pillow was soft and tucked around her neck to keep the cool air out. The sheets were heavy and crisp. Luxury after sleeping huddled in a chair by Jamie’s bed last night. She rolled on her side and tucked her knees up, wrapped her arms across her breasts.
Half an hour more and then she’d relieve Lucas. Or was it Max? Her eyelids dropped shut.
Mitch immediately wandered into her mind. Laughing Mitch with Jamie, holding his boy ever so carefully. Angry Mitch walking away with a bottle in his hand. Mitch with his feet up on his desk snoring as though there was nothing in the world that could disturb him, only to wake up to hell.