Before I’d talked myself out of it, I had a discussion with my boss, George, about the possibility of my leaving to take the job offer with Valiance Corp. He’d been sad, but supportive. Now, I sat next to Julia, across from Cassie in her office. I took a deep breath. “I talked to George this morning and he gave me his blessing. I hope the two of you will too.”
Cassie lifted an eyebrow. “What’s going on?”
Julia gave me a curious look.
“Mr. Foss offered me a position as a senior account manager with Valiance Corp.”
Their eyes widened.
“Oh my God,” Cassie said. “That’s wonderful!”
Grinning, Julia slapped me on the shoulder. “Way to go—congratulations!”
“Thanks,” I said, forcing a smile. “It’s at their London office so I’d have to move. For good this time.”
“Oh,” Cassie said quietly. “Wow. In any case, we’d miss you terribly, but you have our complete support in whatever you decide.”
Staring off into space, Julia shook her head slowly.
“What?” I asked.
“I’m just trying to figure out how you have the energy to entertain job offers with everything else you have going on.”
Cassie rolled her eyes. “Julia.”
“Seriously,” she said. “I can’t even believe you can walk. I mean, how are your legs not frozen like this”—she held her arms out at her side—“by now?”
“Julia!” Cassie smiled, but quickly rolled her lips in. She glanced at me. “Forgive her, please.” Cassie shot her a harsh glance. “She’s very crude.”
I couldn’t help but smile. That redhead, and her crudeness, had never failed to be something else.
Julia scoffed. “Like you weren’t thinking it.”
Cassie stared at her for a few moments before giving me a sheepish look. “I kind of was.” We all laughed and Cassie’s expression sobered. “What’s up, Stacy? Why don’t you seem happy about this?”
I sighed. “I am—I just… it would be a big change. Going to London before was an adjustment, but it was easy because I knew I’d be back soon. Even when three months turned into six it wasn’t that big a deal. This time we’re talking years.” I looked down at the floor. “Forever,” I said softly.
“Are you sure you want to leave those hot guys behind?” Julia asked. She leaned over and dropped her voice. “Or are they going with you?”
I gave her a weak smile. “No, they’re staying.”
“You’re ending things? Are you crazy?”
I took a deep breath and looked at her. “They’ve already ended it.”
“Shut up.” Julia stared at me. “You’re serious?” I nodded and she let out a low whistle. “Then this may seem a tad tacky, but…” She gave me a hopeful look. “Can I get their numbers?”
“Good Lord,” Cassie said.
I couldn’t help it, I laughed.
She gave Cassie a dirty look. “What? I had to ask.”
Cassie waved her off and peered into my face. “So that’s why you haven’t been floating on air the last few weeks.”
I shrugged.
“Is it also why you’re considering relocating for good?”
I wanted to deny it, but it wasn’t completely untrue. Yeah, the chance of a promotion with a prestigious company like Valiance Corp. was amazing. But the only thing that returned to my mind repeatedly was the fact that I no longer had a future here. Not a future at Innovative Images, but a future here, in Oklahoma. I’d lost the men I loved; hell, I didn’t even have Nathan to “settle for” anymore, as Nina had always put it.
“It’s just something I’m considering,” I said, not wanting to admit that Cassie was right.
“Eh,” Julia said, sitting back in her chair. “Only go if you’re running to something, not away from it.”
“That was actually… wise,” Cassie said, frowning.
“I have my moments.”
“Makes sense,” I said to myself. I would definitely be running away from far more than I would be running toward. I knew that, and still, I was tempted beyond belief.
* * *
Justin lined up his shot at the pool table. It was still early so 50/50 wasn’t open yet. It had become a routine for him to stop by after he’d left work, though. Evan sat at a table close by while he sipped a beer and watched Justin play.
A month—a fucking month and, though their friendship had stayed intact, Justin’s heart was anything but. Not a day went by when he wasn’t consumed with thoughts of her. Those brown eyes, that smile, her laugh.
He took his shot and scratched by pocketing the cue ball. “Shit,” he said, slamming the stick on the table.
“Try again,” Evan said quietly.
“Fuck that. I had everything set up perfectly.”
“Sometimes things don’t go the way they’re supposed to.”
Justin shot him a harsh glance. “No shit, Sherlock.” He knew damn well Evan was no longer talking about the pool game. They’d danced around discussing Stacy, neither wanting to be the one who brought her up. But he knew she was a part of every conversation they’d had since the day they’d walked out of her apartment and left her crying. She would undoubtedly be a part of every conversation from here on out. He leaned on the pool table and closed his eyes. “Goddamn it.”
Evan was silent for a while. Finally, he spoke. His tone was so low, Justin could barely hear him. “I miss her too, man.”
“I don’t want to talk about her.” Justin walked over to have a seat across from Evan. It was difficult enough to stop himself from going over to her apartment and kissing her until she couldn’t breathe. And that was without talking about her.
“Okay.”
Justin huffed. “Why couldn’t she just choose, huh? At least one of us would have been happy. But no, she has to be a brat. Now we’re both sitting around, pining away for her, miserable.” He shot up off the chair and marched over to the bar. “This is bullshit.” He went behind the bar and grabbed a beer.
“She said she loves us both, man. She couldn’t choose.”
He scoffed. “Whatever.” Taking a big swig from the bottle, he tried to ignore the ache in his chest. Hearing her confession of love, hearing she felt the same, had overwhelmed him. He’d just never expected to have to share the experience with Evan. She loved him too. Justin smiled wryly at the thought of the bar’s name. 50/50. Fuck.
He’d always known the true inspiration behind Evan’s clever little name. It certainly didn’t refer to their partnership. Justin hadn’t forked over half the money for this place—not even close. No. This was Evan and another one of his lame-ass attempts to be funny.
“Why, man?” Justin asked as he returned to the table where Evan sat. He dropped onto the chair. “Why couldn’t she just choose me?” he asked quietly as he stared off into space.
Evan sighed. “I ask myself the same fucking question every single day.”
Justin nodded. Feeling a dangerous stinging behind his eyes, he rubbed at them. No one needed to know he’d shed tears over a woman—even Evan. And no one needed to see the shit, that was for sure. He felt his friend’s gaze on him, however, and knew that the bastard didn’t need to be told, or shown, anything. He already knew. He knew because he was going through the same damn thing.
It was different for him, though. Justin had always given him shit about being such a sensitive dude. He was probably comfortable with the fact that he’d cried over Stacy. Justin ran a hand over his face as he sat back. “I hate this.”
Evan nodded. “I know. So do I.”
Justin stared at the table, wishing like hell this had all played out differently. He wanted this pain in his chest to go away; he wanted to feel like himself again. Most of all, though, he wanted his woman back.
* * *
Evan watched Justin as he sat there, staring down at the table. He’d once said he didn’t think his friend was capable of being in love. Nothing had shown him how wrong he’d been like t
his past month. Justin could always be a bastard, sure. But he was also a guy who knew how to have fun, be crazy. These last few weeks, he’d been a shell of his former self. Evan couldn’t give him shit about it. He’d also changed into a man he didn’t recognize. He thanked God for the bar, though. It offered a bit of a distraction. As much as anything could.
Instead of time easing the pain, it seemed to increase it. He missed her so much he could barely stand it. He hadn’t told Justin about all the times he’d been tempted to drop by her place. He’d told himself that one last kiss was all he needed, but he knew that was a lie. He wanted to kiss her forever. It had been easy to keep that from Justin—other than tonight, they hadn’t spoken her name once. Evan knew she was on his friend’s mind just as much as she was on his.
The door opened, but he didn’t turn to see who it was. “We’re closed.”
“Obviously,” Nina said. “Either that or your place has gone way downhill in the past month.”
“Your ‘singing,’ ” Justin said, making quotes with his fingers, “could very well have scared everyone off for good.”
Evan smiled as she approached the table.
She scowled down at Justin before glancing at Evan. “I thought you were the funny one?” She pulled out a chair and sat down.
“What brings you by?” Evan asked, not wanting to show the level of his desperation to know anything about her friend.
Nina shrugged. “Haven’t seen you guys in a while.”
“There’s a reason for that,” Justin said dryly before downing his beer.
She flicked some of her blonde hair over her shoulder and regarded them with serious brown eyes. “You guys have got to stop being idiots.”
Evan frowned. “Excuse me?”
“Stacy’s thinking about leaving again, only this time for good. I will not lose my best friend because the two of you are caught in some pathetic pissing match.”
Evan’s heart clenched. “Leaving?”
Justin sat forward. “For good? To go where?”
“To London. She got a job offer a while back, but I guess she wasn’t interested in taking it. Until now.”
Justin’s face went blank as he sat back. “She won’t go.”
Nina shot him a look of disbelief. “Just like she didn’t go last time?”
He cursed under his breath before he stood up. “That was different,” he said, pacing. “It was only temporary.”
“And this time it’s not.” Nina looked at Evan. “You two are the only ones who can stop her. Please.”
Evan frowned even as his heart continued to slam against his ribs. “What makes you think that?”
“Duh. You two are the reason she’s considering leaving.” She stood up and placed her hands on her hips. “So pull your heads out of your asses, forget your stupid pride, and fix this.” She walked toward the door. “Or so help me God,” she called back, “I will get my karaoke on every single night you’re open.”
Evan and Justin looked at one another.
Justin grimaced. “Dude. That’s gonna suck for business.”
Groaning, Evan dropped his head forward. Nina’s threat, as scary as it was, wasn’t the cause of the migraine forming in his head. He didn’t intend to just sit by while Stacy left the country for good. Problem was, what the fuck could he—could they—do about it? Nothing had changed. They both loved her; she loved both of them. She refused to choose.
He sighed and looked up at Justin. “Fuck, man. What do we do?”
Justin stopped pacing and took a deep breath. “Hell if I know.”
Nina’s words rushed back.
Pull your heads out of your asses, forget your stupid pride, and fix this.
It was clear that pride was the main problem here, wanting to be “the one” she chose. Stupid jealousy and pride. Where the hell had it gotten them? Miserable without her, that’s where. Goddamn it—why did everything have to be so complicated? There was only one simple thing Evan knew for certain.
He wanted his woman back.
Thirteen
I’d been staring at Doodle for the last half hour since Nina had rushed off. She’d said she’d forgotten a date with a friend, but I knew better. I’d thrown her for a loop with my admission that I was considering the London job.
I couldn’t blame her for needing time to digest it, but hell, she didn’t need to jet so soon after my reveal. A little discussion would have been nice. “So what do you say, Doo? Back to London?”
Sadly, I’d resorted to trying to convince the dog it was a good idea and even he was having none of it. He rolled onto his back as he lay on my lap, staring up at me. “A little excitement here?” I asked.
He yawned.
I frowned down at him. “Oh, nice.” He jumped off my lap when there was a knock at the door. I rushed over. Nina wasn’t getting away again before we had a nice long talk about this. I pulled the door open. “Hey—” My heart skipped a beat as my stomach fluttered.
“Hey yourself,” Justin said, his blue eyes crinkling in amusement.
Evan gave me a shy smile. “Hi.”
I forced myself to breathe. “Hello,” I said, trying my best not to launch my body into their arms. I finally came to my senses. “I’m sorry, come in.” Moving aside to let them enter, Doodle bounded up.
They bent down to pet him, which gave me time to compose myself. Somewhat. My mind raced as fast as my heart did.
Evan stood up and looked at me. “We, uh, need to talk to you.”
I could only nod.
Justin came to his feet. “Nina told us you were thinking about moving.”
“For good,” Evan said.
Swallowing hard, I nodded again.
“So let me get this straight,” Justin said, gazing up at the ceiling. “Once again, you were planning on leaving and not saying a word to us.”
“I—I didn’t know I was supposed to. You both said good-bye to me. I didn’t think you cared.”
Chuckling, Evan shook his head. “Can you believe this woman?”
Justin narrowed his eyes at me. “Didn’t think we cared? Are you fucking kidding?”
I crossed my arms. “No.” I looked from one to the other. “Do you?”
“We’re in love with you, Stacy,” Evan said quietly. “Remember?”
Like I ever could have forgotten hearing both of them saying those words to me.
“Of course we care,” he finished.
Justin let out a weary sigh. “Not only do we care, but we’re not letting it happen. So”—he waved his hand—“whatever your plans are, change ’em.”
I laughed. It was my turn to be incredulous. “Are you kidding me?”
They looked at me impassively.
“You both dump me and now that I may be leaving, you hightail it back here to… to what? Demand I stay?”
“Yes,” Justin said.
“We’re not demanding anything—”
“The hell I’m not,” Justin said, staring at me.
“Why?” I asked, giving him a hard look before turning to Evan. “Why do you want me here? Why does it matter? We’re not together anyway.”
“Maybe I want you here because the thought of you being anywhere else fucking kills me.” Justin sucked in a deep breath. “Maybe I’m ready to stop being an idiot.”
Evan peered into my eyes. “I want you here because you being elsewhere means it’s really over. I want you here because I want you.”
Tears formed in my eyes as I shook my head. “Stop, please. Nothing’s changed. I still can’t choose between the two of you.” I angrily brushed at my eyes. “And even if I could, it would cause a horrible rift in your friendship. I’d never want to do that.”
“You wouldn’t,” Evan said.
“You couldn’t.” Justin glanced at Evan before looking me in the eye. “We’ve been fools, Stacy. So if we have to work on not being jealous, fine, we can do that. But some part of us will always feel a little a jealous when you spend time with the other g
uy.”
Evan smiled down at the floor. “It’s only natural when another man’s spending time with the woman you love—even if that other man is your best friend.”
“After Nina told us you were thinking of leaving, we talked things through.” Justin shook his head. “Nothing’s worth losing you, babe. This last month has been hell. I can’t go the rest of my life feeling that way.”
“I guess you could say we had an epiphany.” Evan shrugged. “We didn’t realize how we were driving you crazy with the possessiveness. Thing was, Justin thought of you as his woman and I thought of you as mine.”
I wiped at a tear as it rolled down my face. “And now?” I asked weakly.
“You’re ours,” Evan said. “I mean, we want you to be—”
“Fuck that,” Justin said, shooting him a look. “She’s ours.”
I laughed through my tears then. “Are you sure?”
“Yes,” Evan said.
“Definitely.” Justin gave me his sexy smirk. “But God help any other man who thinks he’s getting in on this.”
Evan nodded. “We’d fuck him up.”
I smiled as I sniffled. “Deal.” I’d never want another man anyway. It was an easy deal to make.
“Anyway,” Justin said, “we didn’t know how long we had before you made your decision about leaving so we thought it best to come by tonight.”
“Whether you give us another chance or not,” Evan said, “we don’t want to be the reason you leave.”
Justin gave me a steady look. “Stay.”
“Please,” Evan said. “Because if you don’t, Nina said she’d sing at 50/50 every night.” He leaned in. “Every. Night.”
I laughed. Nina fought dirty. I had to remember to thank her.
“Just think about it, will you?” Evan kissed my cheek.
“Later, babe.” Justin brushed his lips against my other cheek.
They turned to go, but I caught their hands. “I don’t need time to think.” They looked at me. What I needed was clarification before I took this plunge. “I don’t have to choose, right?”
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