“There’s over $3,000 in here,” Jeff enthused, pointing to the studio offering. “And we had at least fifty newcomers in the audience.”
“And the phone calls,” Buck added. “I took at least 30 and who knows if I got them all? That’s another $3,000, and one lady made a $1,000 donation on her credit card.” Just as quickly, Buck stopped smiling; his face etched in seriousness. “But we’re going to need to get extra help. I can’t answer the phones, take up the offering, and monitor the audience all at once.”
Ray chuckled. “Remember, one step at a time.” The group of four huddled around a distressed table in the empty studio. “But this is an excellent start.”
From across the small table, Susannah radiated elation. “This is a good thing, but I have to apologize.” Her gaze connected with Ray, her fine-boned face luminous. “I didn’t mean to take over the show, but the Spirit came upon me saying, ‘Tell your story!’ And I had to because without you and this program, Reverend, I truly would not be sitting here today.”
Ray smiled, taken with her honesty and humility. “No apology necessary,” he replied. “It was a beautiful story, and I’m thankful you’ve come into our lives. This is the first real assurance I’ve had that everything we’ve done hasn’t been in vain.” Ray, Buck, and Jeff stood, the offertory piled between them. “Today is confirmation that The Road to Calvary does indeed have a future and will continue!”
“Hallelujah!” Jeff hollered, pumping balled fists over his head. Observing Jeff’s reaction, Buck’s response was tempered.
“That’s great news, Ray, but we gotta discuss getting those phones answered if we’re going to do live broadcasts permanently. I can’t split myself into multiple people.”
Ray’s eyes twinkled as he stood and came around to pat Buck’s tense shoulder. “I know, Buck. We will get you the help you need.” But he wanted to savor this moment of renewed energy and faith. “The Lord was truly present here today. As Susannah was telling her story, a voice said to me, ‘Ray! Use the resources you have available to you!’ That means we involve the very community we serve, giving them ownership of this program—”
“And a sense of empowerment,” Susannah interjected. Just as quickly, she stopped herself. “Excuse me, I didn’t mean to interrupt.”
Ray faced her. “You’re exactly right. We empower our congregation to use their gifts and talents, and remarkable things can happen.”
“Please, no women empowered by makeup,’” Jeff said, his squeamish expression impossible to hide.
The three chortled, and Ray patted Jeff’s shoulder. “You might have to get used to that, Jeff. A five-minute segment may be a real selling point.”
Jeff looked at everyone, stuttering slightly. “Uh, w-well, that’s okay, I guess. I just need to get used to the idea. I never thought ’bout religion and makeup at the same time.”
The reverend laughed. “As I said, let’s take it one step at a time.” He stopped for a moment. “Can you all meet Thursday evening?”
All three nodded their heads. “All right, then, come at six o’clock prepared with a list of members you think would be interested in volunteering. I think we can safely say our live experiment was a triumph, and it needs to continue.” Ray felt the thrill racing through his body. He turned to Susannah. “I’m starved. Would you be interested in getting a bite to eat after locking up?”
Her smile was warm and inviting. “I’d love to.”
Buck waved the couple onward. “You go get something to eat. Jeff and I will lock up.”
The lines in Ray’s face softened when he smiled. “I’d appreciate that. I’ll see you gentlemen on Thursday,” he said with a nod in Buck and Jeff’s direction before offering Susannah his arm. He never saw the quick, slightly curious glance between the two men.
After the couple departed, Buck turned to Jeff. “I’ve never seen Ray react to a woman like that.” He sighed. “He’s been a widower so long; it never occurred to me that he might find someone.”
“Me either,” Jeff acknowledged. “But, there’s a first time for everything, bro,” he said.
As Jeff headed out the door, Buck remained sitting deep in thought. He had no problem with Ray falling in love; it was the fact that he hadn’t ever considered it that gnawed at him. After several minutes, Buck rose from the table with the thought that more than The Road to Calvary was changing.
LATER THE SAME DAY ST. LOUIS, MISSOURI KAY’S DINER
The summer breeze caught Susannah’s skirt as Ray held the diner’s glass door. He couldn’t help but notice her shapely legs underneath.
“It’s nothing fancy—good home cooking that fills the hungry emptiness in a single man’s stomach.” He gestured toward the hostess who seated them in a corner booth.
Menus before them, Susannah scanned her options for dinner. “It all looks wonderful.”
“I’ve never had a bad meal here. In fact, I think I’ve eaten almost everything on the menu. On Sundays, the roast beef dinner special is particularly good.”
“Hey, Reverend,” said the waitress in the crisp yellow uniform, her name, MAVIS, stitched across the pocket. With a familiar smile, she was already pouring Ray coffee. “Coffee for the lady as well?”
“Yes, please. With cream. What are you having, Ray?”
“I’ll do the special. It reminds me of Sunday dinners growing up.”
Mavis returned with Susannah’s coffee, and they ordered the special. Ray genuinely wanted to learn more about Miss Susannah Baker who, like an answer to a desperate prayer, had appeared in their lives at exactly the right moment. “Tell me about yourself,” he said. “Are you from St. Louis?”
Her coffee turned light brown as she stirred in cream. “I’ve been living here slightly over a year—since I watched you on The Road to Calvary and got sober.”
“What brought you to our fine community? Family? A job?”
She tilted her chin upwards. “Neither. I needed a fresh start after a contentious divorce and family tragedy. I thought a bigger city in the Midwest might have potential.”
Ray paused, watching her bring the cup to her full lips, her eyes never leaving his face. “You certainly discovered your potential on The Road to Calvary, Susannah. I genuinely appreciate what you did today. I haven’t seen that level of enthusiasm among the congregation since we started.”
“Give yourself due credit, Ray. Your idea to reach out to the congregation and ask them to contribute their gifts is wonderful. They’ll respond.”
Mavis arrived with steaming plates of roast beef dinner. “Anything else I can get you two?”
“I’d have more coffee, Mavis,” Ray said, his eyes never leaving Susannah’s luminous face. “I’m not trying to pry,” he continued to her, “but you said you suffered a family tragedy. Can I be of help in any way?”
Susannah smiled. “The food smells delicious, and I don’t know about you, Reverend, but I’m starved.”
When she changed the subject, Ray felt as though he may have overstepped his bounds; after all, he barely knew this woman. “I’m sorry, Susannah, this is a personal matter, and I have no right asking you to share it.”
She finished her first bite, wiping her mouth with a napkin. “You have the right to know, as that tragedy is what sent me spiraling into the depths of alcoholism and despair, from which you, Ray, saved me. This roast beef is wonderful, by the way.”
“Good, I’m glad.” He reached over the table, patting her hand.
“I learned in AA that life-altering situations are very often the catalyst that lead people to drugs or alcohol to cope with a trauma they can’t begin to know how to handle or survive. In my case, the divorce was a result of circumstances that neither my husband, Perry, nor I could comprehend. We lost our two young children in a car accident.” She paused, gazing darkly at the water in her glass, as if seeing the terrible events unfurl again before her eyes.
Ray had heard plenty of stories detailing sorrow and misfortune in his business, but this was
particularly wrenching. He said nothing and let her finish.
“Perry’s sister, Carla, was babysitting our kids. On her way home from a birthday party, a drunk driver ran a red light, killing all three instantly. The autopsy later revealed Carla was pregnant, and the driver was charged in the deaths of four, including her fetus. Everything you’ve heard about the immeasurable grief a parent feels in burying her children is true. Our marriage collapsed within a year, each of us blaming the other.” Susannah took a breath, rubbing away tears. “I had already started drinking to ease the pain of losing my children. I thought if I moved away, the past wouldn’t follow me, but it did. I kept drinking and falling closer and closer to the bottom. Then I found you and The Road to Calvary.”
“I am so deeply sorry for your loss—both of your children and your marriage. But you seem to be a very strong woman, Susannah, and I’m glad you found us.”
Over the remainder of dinner, their conversation returned to how taking The Road to Calvary live had made the possibility of success a sudden reality. Ray was struck by Susannah’s determination to move on from unendurable heartbreak. Lorraine’s death had ripped at Ray’s heart, but he had known they might lose that battle. Despite their different circumstances, Ray believed this woman understood the meaning of profound loss and redemption. Perhaps they were destined to meet, he thought.
“Any dessert tonight, Reverend? We’ve got your favorite, homemade apple pie.”
He looked toward Susannah who waved that she’d had her fill. “I think that’ll do it, Mavis,” he replied. “We’ll take the check.”
Turning toward her, he met Susannah’s gaze, trying to show appreciation without sounding overly forward. “This is going to sound corny, but you came into my life at precisely the right moment. If I hadn’t made your acquaintance, The Road to Calvary would be through. I can’t thank you enough—”
Susannah held her palm open, interrupting him. “If anybody should be giving thanks, it’s me—because if I hadn’t turned that television on and heard you, I’d be dead.” She paused, her scrutiny intense. “But for someone who does so much for others, what about you, Reverend?”
Ray wasn’t sure what she meant. He tried to keep his face expressionless, but he knew he furrowed his brow.
She held the coffee cup in her slender hands, elbows perched on the table. “I was curious to learn more about the man who’d saved my life, so I did some research. Reminiscent of your father, the Reverend David Williams, you’ve devoted your life to serving God in small congregations throughout the Midwest—Bellville, Illinois; Greencastle, Indiana; Louisville, Kentucky. But I’ll bet your faith in God was sorely tested, wasn’t it, when you did everything you were supposed to do, but your wife, Lorraine, still died from ovarian cancer? After your wife passed, you could have turned away from God, but you didn’t. Instead, you put your message on television and forged ahead, risking everything to save even a few.”
As he listened to her, Ray wasn’t angry or bothered that Susannah Baker had inquired into his life story. Instead, it made perfect sense that this amazingly perceptive stranger would seek answers and put someone else’s hardships above her own. He said nothing, preferring to let her continue.
“Our paths crossed, and through you, I’ve gotten a second chance at life. If a few of my ideas can help The Road to Calvary achieve success and see you happy, that’s a bargain in my eyes.”
It seemed like decades since anyone had been concerned about his happiness. “You are one incredible woman. But I’m not unhappy,” he lied.
“If my prying is uninvited, I apologize,” she said. “But it seems to me that a man who devotes his life to helping others should have someone who’s willing to show that same kind of devotion in his life. And I think God wants you to be happy, too.”
Ray couldn’t take his eyes off her beautiful smile and was about to reply when Mavis’s cheery voice brought him back to earth. “Here you go, Reverend,” she said, placing the check on the table. “You both have a nice evening.”
“You, too, Mavis,” he replied. “Tell Bernie the food was delicious as always.”
“I sure will.” Mavis winked.
“Let me get this,” he said, removing a leather wallet smoothed by use and time from his jacket pocket, the check and wallet in his strong grip. “I should be getting home, but can I drop you somewhere?”
She had risen from the chair, ironing the crease in her skirt with her hands. “If you could drop me off at the bus stop, that would be fine.” She fidgeted nervously, snatching her purse off the table and clutching it tightly.
Ray stood, watching her; she had started rummaging through the bag, refusing eye contact, and his curiosity was piqued. “Drop you at the bus stop? This isn’t the best of neighborhoods. I’d be more than happy to drive you home.”
Susannah stared into the void of her open bag and shuffled her feet. She still didn’t look at Ray, and after a few long seconds, she spoke, “You know, that is so sweet of you, Reverend; and I do appreciate the offer, but I can’t let you take me home.”
The woman who had so confidently told him of her dream and relayed her story of salvation in front of the congregation now seemed to be retreating into her body. His mind buzzing with questions, Ray wanted to understand her dilemma.
“Why not?” he asked, trying hard not to be crushed at the possibility there might be someone else. “Is there a jealous boyfriend at home who doesn’t know you’re here? I’d be happy to explain everything.”
She dropped back down into the chair, one arm through the strap of her purse as she searched for words. “This is embarrassing, but . . . there is no home.”
He squeezed her arm with a comforting hand. “You don’t have anything to be ashamed of. Tell me, so I can at least try to help you.”
Her voice grew anxious, and as she relayed details of her situation, the words tumbled out faster and faster. “You’ve heard my story and that you helped me find sobriety. But what you wouldn’t know is that financially things haven’t gone so great. I work temporary jobs when I can get them, and when I can’t, which is right now because I haven’t worked in almost three months, then I . . . I have to live in my car or stay at a shelter.”
This was not where he had expected this conversation to lead, but Ray was moved by both the desperation of Susannah’s plight and her determination to maintain her dignity. His fingers slid softly along her arm, lightly grasping her trembling hand. “I can find you a place to stay. We can go to your car and get your things—”
“No,” she interrupted, the quiver in her voice evident. She wouldn’t look at him, but still clutched his hand.
“All right,” he said, trying to soothe her. “If you’d rather I didn’t see how you’ve been forced to live, that’s fine. But I won’t allow you to spend another night sleeping in your car. We’ll go to Target and get you a toothbrush and some pajamas. There’s a motel I know of where you can stay and be safe.”
Her whole body shivered as tears rolled down her flushed cheeks. Squeezing his hand tighter, she spoke in a hoarse whisper, barely audible, “Okay, we can go to Target, if it’s no trouble.”
Ray patted the top of her hand, feeling she was holding onto him as if he were a lifeline. “It’s no trouble. No trouble at all.”
Once finished at Target, he drove to a hotel specializing in extended stays. He knew the manager, a former drug addict whom he had helped get a fresh start after rehab. Ray had called ahead and arranged for Susannah to stay there.
Doug Snyder, the owner, met them at the motel. “Any friend of Reverend Ray’s is a friend of mine.” He smiled, extending a muscular hand. “You’re welcome here as long as you need.”
Susannah shook Doug’s hand as Ray registered her. Ray said, “I’m not sure how long Miss Baker will be staying, but I’ll keep you informed.”
“No problem. There’s a bedroom, kitchenette, bathroom, and sitting area,” Doug said, directing his comments to Susannah. “If I can be of any furt
her assistance, please let me know.”
Ray carried in the red-and-white plastic bags, and they made their way to her room. He opened the door and guided her in. “As Doug said, you’re welcome to stay here. A week, a month, however long until you’re back on your feet, understand?”
“But how will you pay for this? I can’t accept—”
He touched his fingertips together. “Susannah, you have helped me see the potential for The Road to Calvary and not give up. This is my way of saying thank you. As for money, God will provide. Tomorrow, we’ll get you some groceries, so you won’t starve.” The reverend stretched out his right hand. “Good night, Susannah.” Ray reached into his pocket, removing a business card and pen. “I almost forgot—here’s my home number if you need anything. If you’re an early riser, I’d be happy to pick you up for breakfast.”
She gratefully clasped his hand, eyes wet and glistening. “Breakfast sounds wonderful. Thank you, Reverend. I’m very, very grateful.”
14
WEDNESDAY, JULY 10, 2002 ST. LOUIS, MISSOURI THE ROAD TO CALVARY SET
Two weeks after the first live broadcast, the Reverend Ray stepped from behind the podium, skimming the congregation from the stage. He estimated the audience had grown to over three hundred, a perfect occasion to offer every one of them an opportunity to live the word of God.
“Friends, today we heard about using our many and varied gifts in answering God’s call. But I leave you with a challenge.” Ray, in a contemporary navy suit, looked across the many faces. “The Road to Calvary requests your gifts and talents—singers, songwriters, musicians, carpenters, electricians, seamstresses, and many others—to keep this ministry alive. In the fellowship line today, we will be asking those of you we are acquainted with to heed God’s call and put your talents to use.” He smiled warmly at his flock. “How many of you will accept the challenge and answer God’s call?”
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