But he didn’t. Instead he looked at her and asked, “Are you okay?”
“Why wouldn’t I be?”
Apparently the sarcasm was lost on him because all he said in response was, “I wanted to be sure.” He gave her a smile, then rose. “I know you have to close out for the day and I need to get back to the office. I’m glad you’re all right with this. I appreciate having one less thing to worry about.”
Did he? How lovely. How great for him.
Fury built inside of her, but she ignored it and him. The need to throw something grew, but she resisted. After all, not only would she be stuck paying for whatever she broke, she would also have to clean it up. Because life sucked—especially hers.
He paused by the front door. “Helen?”
Hope fluttered. Happy, bright, maybe-he-wasn’t-as-stupid-as-he-looked hope. “Yes?”
“Lock the door behind me.”
That was it, and then he was gone.
Lock the door? Lock the door? Because someone sneaking in was the worst thing that could happen to her today?
“Asshole,” she muttered as she went to the door and turned the lock.
As she returned to the counter, she passed a table with a vase on it. She reached for the perfect tulip, jerked it out of the water, then snapped its stem. After tossing it in the trash, she scooped out a bowl of ice cream, sank to the floor and started to cry.
21
Olivia felt the burn in her legs. She’d passed exhaustion two miles before and was now running on sheer force of will. That and the fact that she wasn’t exactly sure where she was or how far she’d gone.
She’d gotten up at six, pulled on her running clothes and headed out. She hadn’t warmed up or brought water or even her phone, all of which were stupid. Now she was dehydrated and potentially lost. Maybe she would pass out—not a normal goal, but if she was unconscious then she wouldn’t have to think about what had happened the previous night. She wouldn’t have to relive the fight with her sister and remember how hurt Kelly had looked when she’d learned the truth.
Olivia knew she had no one to blame but herself. Trusting Marilee was five kinds of stupid. Her mother couldn’t be trusted—she knew that, but she’d done it anyway. She’d handed Marilee a weapon and then had been cut down not forty-eight hours later.
The ache in her legs turned to actual pain. She slowed to a walk and tried to catch her breath. Running had always been her escape but today she couldn’t go fast enough or far enough to get away from what had happened.
She wasn’t worried about her dad. He would understand and even if he didn’t, he would forgive her for lying. But Kelly was different. She and Kelly were just getting to know each other. They were becoming friends, which was different than being sisters. Now that had been blown and she didn’t know how to fix it.
She heard a truck behind her. She thought briefly about waving her arms and asking for help, then told herself not to be foolish. Bad stuff happened everywhere, even in places like Tulpen Crossing.
But even without her flagging it down, the truck slowed. She turned and recognized the vehicle. Not Ryan’s, thank God, but Sven’s.
“You ran too far,” he said after he’d rolled down the passenger window. “Are you all right?”
“No.”
He leaned over and opened the door. “Get in. Have you had breakfast?”
Breakfast as in a meal or breakfast as in sex? Because she wasn’t up for anything physical right now.
The question must have shown on her face. His expression gentled. “Breakfast, Olivia. Just food and maybe I listen while you talk.”
Her eyes burned, but she blinked away the weakness before nodding. “Thank you.”
“Anytime.”
She could barely crawl into the seat. As soon as she sat down, her legs started shaking. He handed her a half-empty bottle of water.
“Sorry, that’s all I have with me.”
“It’s okay.”
She took a sip, careful to let her stomach absorb the fluid before taking a second sip. Her mouth was dry, as was her throat. Her body screamed at her for water, but she knew if she drank too much, too quickly, she would throw it all up and wouldn’t that be pretty.
“I had to get a shipment off this morning,” he said as they drove back to his place. “There’s a trucking company I use that’s very reasonable, but the drivers like to make an early start. Did I tell you I’m growing blueberries? They’re ripe and delicious. Blueberries are a good fruit. Lots of antioxidants.”
The inane conversation should have bothered her but she had a feeling he was simply filling silence and giving her space to come to grips with whatever was wrong. She leaned back against the seat and closed her eyes. Her legs continued to shake as her muscles surrendered to exhaustion.
He pulled onto his property. “After breakfast, we’ll go look in the barn. People have been dropping off items for your auction. You’re going to have a lot to go through.” He turned off the engine. “Don’t try to walk. I’ll come get you.”
“I’m fine,” she told him. She swallowed the last of the water, then opened the passenger door. Rather than try to step down, she slid off the seat. Her feet came in contact with the ground and she automatically braced her muscles to stay standing.
Nothing cooperated. Her knees gave way and she started to go down. Sven reached her in time to grab her.
“You’re a stubborn woman.”
“Sometimes.”
He scooped her up as if she weighed nothing and carried her into the house. The back door was unlocked—of course. He took her through the mudroom and into the kitchen. He set her on one of the bar stools by the island.
“Don’t move.” His voice was stern.
He got a glass and poured her orange juice. “Drink this. It will help with the shaking. Your blood sugar is low and you’re dehydrated. You could have collapsed.”
Exactly what she’d been hoping for, she thought as she drank the fresh juice. Only in hindsight, it might not have been her best idea.
He started coffee, then began pulling ingredients out of the refrigerator. Instead of eggs, he collected fresh, thickly cut bread along with brie and ripe pears.
He put sandwiches together, then poured her coffee. While the panini pan heated, he got her water, then gently massaged her calves. The trembling had stopped, but she was still exhausted and knew she would be sore for days.
His large hands moved over her skin. His fingers and thumbs dug in to her muscles. There was nothing sexual about the actions, but she sensed his concern and kindness.
When the sandwiches were done, he sliced each of them in half and set them on a plate next to a small bowl of blueberries. She managed to hobble to the kitchen table and sank down next to him.
“Eat,” he told her.
She took a bite. The combination of creamy, salty cheese with the tart pear and toasted bread nearly made her groan. She devoured half the sandwich before trying the blueberries. They were as perfect and ripe as he’d claimed. She inhaled the second half of her sandwich before reaching for her coffee.
Her blood sugar must have stabilized because she felt more alert. The emotional pain of the previous night was still there, but that would take a while to fade. Time and very possibly an apology.
She sighed. “My mother’s back.”
“I heard.”
“I don’t know how much you know about her past,” she began, then hesitated, not wanting to go into it.
“I know enough.”
“Good. Then you can imagine what a shock it was to everyone. I’m not sure she’s even seen my dad since she walked out on us thirteen years ago. She hasn’t seen Kelly, either. I don’t think they talk at all.”
“What about you?” His blue gaze was steady, as if he
had all the time in the world for her.
She explained how she’d been sent to boarding school when she was fifteen and how alone she’d felt. “I didn’t have anyone in the world. A friend’s older sister helped me track down my mom and we got in touch. We met a few times. Different weekends. She flew me to New York once and we stayed at the St. Regis hotel. It was very fancy.”
“And nice to have a secret.”
She nodded. “We were friends more than mother and daughter. She was so fun, like a grown-up girlfriend.”
She drew in a breath. “I went to TCU to be with Ryan. When he was drafted and left school to play for a triple A team, Mom suggested I transfer to ASU to be near her. Then when I graduated I went to work for her in her real estate firm.”
She set down her coffee and rested her elbows on the table. “I never told my dad or Kelly any of that. Not when it was happening or later. Like you said, it was a nice secret. Mom and I were back together and we had each other. I told myself that was all I needed. Only it didn’t work out.”
“Why not?”
“She’s...she’s not like other mothers. Marilee lives her own life by her own rules and no one gets in the way. Not even her daughter. When I first went to work for her it was great but lately she’s been difficult. I’ve been thinking of trying something different, of getting away. I took off the summer to figure out my next move. She knew I was coming home. I just never expected her to follow me.”
“You’re uncomfortable having your mother back here?”
“Yes, and I didn’t tell my dad or Kelly about any of it. When she showed up, we agreed she wouldn’t say anything.”
“You lied to them.”
There was no judgment in his voice but she felt the slap. “Not exactly.” She hesitated then groaned. “Okay, yes, and it was stupid. Not only because I was wrong, but because I trusted her. Then she spills it all at dinner. Kelly’s furious. I don’t know what my dad’s thinking, but he can’t be happy. I didn’t mean for it to happen, it’s just I thought if they knew I was with Mom they...”
She reached for her coffee, not sure what she was trying to not say.
“You were afraid they wouldn’t like you if they knew about your mother,” Sven filled in. “That they would think less of you. Or worse, that they wouldn’t welcome you. Because despite spending time with her all these years, you don’t have her. Not the way you want to.”
She nodded, too tired to be surprised by his insight. “I hurt Kelly. I betrayed her and I don’t know how to fix that. Plus, when I think about what happened when we were kids, I get so mad. Kelly had Dad. He’s the good parent. Mom is fun, but it’s not like I could ever depend on her. She left me. I was twelve years old and she disappeared without warning. One day she was just gone and I didn’t have anyone.”
She wasn’t aware she was crying but suddenly it was hard to see. She brushed at her cheeks and was surprised to find tears. Sven made a noise in the back of his throat and reached for her. Before she could figure out what was happening, she was on his lap with his arms around her.
She hung on and rested her cheek against his rock-hard shoulder. She couldn’t remember the last time someone had been so willing to take care of her.
“I’m screwed up,” she whispered.
“Yes, you are, but everyone is in one way or another.”
“Kelly hates me.”
“Kelly isn’t the type of person to hate anyone. Apologize. She’ll forgive you. You’re safe, Olivia. Right this second, you’re totally safe. Do you believe me?”
She nodded because speaking was impossible. Who was this man and why was he being so nice to her? Not a question she was going to ask, she told herself. Instead she was simply going to be very, very grateful.
* * *
Griffith stared at the computer screen and wished he’d put in a “no porn” filter before beginning his search. He mentally weeded out the obvious gross sites, then reluctantly clicked on a promising looking article.
Only text appeared, along with a couple of ads for a belt sander he’d been thinking of buying. Nothing a guy didn’t want to see at eight on a Saturday morning. Not that he minded looking at a naked woman, but unless she was someone he was actually sleeping with, Griffith preferred to wait until his second cup of coffee.
He read the article twice, learned nothing new, then closed it and leaned back in his study chair. He didn’t have a clue about what to do with Kelly. Or to her. Of all the things he’d thought might derail them, her not being able to have an orgasm hadn’t even been in the top one thousand.
For the past three days he’d read enough to qualify himself as a semi-expert on the topic. He understood the stages of female arousal, he’d studied shockingly detailed diagrams of female anatomy. He could name all the parts, describe what it felt like when the G-spot was swollen, list fifteen different techniques to use during oral sex and he had a working knowledge of common physical reasons women didn’t climax. While he found the information interesting, he had his doubts about any of it helping Kelly. He didn’t think the problem was her body at all. He thought it was her head...and her mother.
In addition to reading and studying, he’d been doing a lot of thinking. Kelly’s mom had been, to put it politely, promiscuous. She’d slept with more men than he would have thought possible in a town their size, including a few students. She hadn’t been subtle about it and she’d humiliated her husband and her children. Griffith knew Kelly had been traumatized by her mother’s behavior. Having Marilee walk out when Kelly was only fifteen had only compounded the problem.
Kelly didn’t want to be like Marilee. Marilee liked sex, therefore Kelly couldn’t.
He knew he was oversimplifying the problem and possibly getting it all wrong, but in his gut, he thought he was onto at least some part of the truth. He also guessed the issue might not be all about sex at all. That somehow love and commitment were woven into it. Why else would an otherwise fairly traditional twenty-eight-year-old woman be willing to enter into a long-term relationship where there was no promise of love and marriage?
He thought about what Sven had implied—that Kelly being quiet in bed had been a euphemism for something else. He wondered how hard the other man had tried to get her over the edge, then shook his head. Something else he didn’t want to think about so early in the day. Or ever.
He reached for his coffee. Now that he’d defined the problem, he had to figure out how to solve it. He knew he was in way over his head, but hey, he knew all the stages of female arousal, so that was something. Maybe he would pinpoint where she derailed. Because he would have sworn she was doing just fine. And she’d been the one to initiate sex, so she wasn’t opposed to the concept. It was the end that stalled her. Was it losing control? Did she slam on the brakes because she was afraid of what would happen?
He got up and walked to the kitchen to pour his third cup of coffee. Okay—he might or might not know the problem. He now had several new techniques to try. He was armed with information and a willing spirit, not to mention a dick that was very happy to take one for the team...over and over again.
As long as she was game, he was going to work to find the solution to the problem, and when they got there, he was going to have a hell of a good time saying “I told you so.”
* * *
Kelly wrapped a towel around herself and stepped out of the shower only to find Olivia standing by their long, shared vanity. Kelly came to a stop, not sure what to do. She’d been trying really hard to avoid being alone with Olivia. Okay, she’d actually been trying really hard not to see her sister at all, but run-ins were inevitable what with them living in the same house and sharing said bathroom.
“You can’t avoid me forever,” Olivia said, her arms folded across her chest, her gaze determined.
“I can try.”
“That’s mature.�
��
“Trust me. Dealing with immature is going to be a whole lot easier for you than dealing with incredibly pissed off.”
“You’re mad at me.”
“No, why would you say that?”
Kelly started to walk around her, but Olivia blocked her only way to her bedroom.
Kelly rolled her eyes. “Really? This is how you want to play it?”
“I’ll play it any way I have to. We need to talk. You can listen easy or you can listen hard, but one way or the other, we’re going to have a conversation.”
“How do you listen hard?”
Olivia groaned. “You know what I mean.”
“I do, but you really have to work on your communication skills.” She realized she wasn’t acting angry enough and glared. “Why on earth would I want to talk to you?”
“I didn’t say talk, I said listen.”
“You said we had to talk.”
Olivia threw her hands in the air. “Dear God, will you stop? I know what I said and you’re not going to distract me. I’m sorry I didn’t tell you I was living in Phoenix with Mom.” She sighed. “Not living with her, but working with her and spending time with her. I was afraid you’d be upset if you found out.”
“Good call.”
“I was afraid you wouldn’t want me around.”
“Again, excellent deductive skills.”
Her sister leaned against the counter. “You can be as sarcastic as you want, but the truth is we’re sisters. Marilee screwed us both. She left us both. I was just as abandoned as you, Kelly. Maybe more. I was younger and I didn’t have Dad the way you did.”
Kelly didn’t want to think about that. She tightened her towel and tried not to feel sympathetic for the kid her sister had been.
She wanted to say that Olivia hadn’t been alone—that she and her dad had been there for her, only she was pretty sure they hadn’t been. She was pretty sure they’d been so confused and upset that she’d been forgotten.
Secrets of the Tulip Sisters Page 24