by Ivy Spears
Once again, the same uncomfortableness washed over my body that always did whenever anyone wanted to talk about my father. I didn’t know what to say, because the truth was, I didn’t know my father that well anymore. Who the hell was Earl and why did my dad look like they were best friends in that picture?
I squinted at it close, taking in my dad’ s genuine smile.
He looked happy, really happy.
So I said what I always said lately. “Thank you.” It wasn’t much, it wasn’t really anything, but I was still trying to figure out how I felt about all this myself, let alone a bunch of people who had these relationships and experiences with my dad I couldn’t even begin to understand.
“I was just with him the night before, you know? He was going on and on about how he was finally going to get around to fixing up that old barn out back.” He smiled fondly and shook his head before picking up the cell phone and scanning it. “Of course, he was always talking about how he was going to get around to it and it never happened but still… sometimes you talk about things that never get done hoping this will be the one time it really does, you know?”
The old red barn in the back of our house popped into my mind. It had been beautiful when we were younger, bright and polished in all its glory. My mom and dad had built it before I was born and when I was younger it was the best place in the world to me.
Animals always running around, fresh crops growing just outside, there was a tire swing inside where Asher and I would swing back and forth for hours. After my mom had died of cancer when I was twelve my dad had started to let it go down hill, not replacing chipped wood or peeled off paint. Pretty soon he had given the animals we had away and watched it go further and further off the rails.
It was unrecognizable now.
I hadn’t even known he was considering revising it.
Earl handed my credit card back to me, reminding me he had taken it in the first place and slipped the phone into my hand. “You take care now, we’re all going through this with you.”
I forced a smile, making my feet move toward the door.
An hour later I was standing in the middle of our old barn, taking in every corner and ever board that lined the wall. It was worse than I imagined, way more impaired than I thought.
The wood looked stained and damaged. The paint was chipped off and in the places it was still visible, dirt and dust clouded its color. The top of the roof was broken, caving in around the edges and causing huge holes in the center. The entire thing would probably have to be replaced.
Lord knew how much work it would need to get up to code.
“Big job.” The kid next to me, who’d introduced himself as Ralph, let out a low whistle and looked down at the clipboard in his hand. “When were you hoping to get it done by?”
I turned toward him, squinting to keep the sun out of my eyes. “As soon as possible.” I gestured toward the piles of old wood, broken trees, falling apart cages, and leaves and sticks that covered the floor. “I can take care of the cleanup myself but that’s about as far as my abilities go.”
The kid nodded like he expected as much and started flipping through the pages on his clipboard. “Okay, looks like we can get started in about… twelve weeks. How does that work for you?”
Twelve weeks? He had to be kidding. I was thinking they could get started, like, next week. I really wanted this place to be ready by the time my dad woke up and if I had to wait twelve weeks the chances of that happening were pretty slim. “Twelve weeks? I was really hoping to get started sooner than that.”
“We’re pretty backed up,” Ralph said, still flipping pages in every which direction. “I can talk to my boss about trying to move it up but he’s pretty strict about dates, he hates delivering an unrealistic time frame to customers, just lets them down, you know?”
I sighed. I knew this was a risk, expecting people to jump through hoops for me with so little notice. It was an impulsive move, leaping into motion as soon as I left the convenient store when I hadn’t even looked at the farm up close, but all I could think about was the look on my dad’s face when I brought him home from the hospital for the first time and he saw it completely redone.
“Did you have a budget in mind?” He asked me now, ignoring the blank look on my face at the delivery of his last statement. “A job this big… I would say you should be prepared to spend at least twenty.”
“Twenty?”
“Thousand,” Ralph clarified.
Dread sunk into my body. I had 10 thousand dollars in my savings account. It was everything I had managed to save in the last five years. I’d only been working as an actual nurse for the last two and between student loans, rent, and all my other bills it was a miracle I’d been able to even save that.
“I was thinking more in the 5 to 10 range.” There were three contractures listed in the phone book for the town, I’d gone with the first one listed. But something told me the prices the other two would give me wouldn’t be much better than the quote this kid was shooting off the top of his head.
He let out another whistle. “It’ll be tight… really tight.”
I knew he wasn’t trying to make me feel bad, he was just trying to warn me.
He must have seen the defeated look on my face because he moved closer to me and lowered his voice. “Look, my boss is almost here now, most of the time he’ll work with people on the price. He has a great relationship with most of the hardware stores and factories in the state so sometimes he can lean on them a little bit, get their prices down.”
I forced a half smile. “Ten thousand dollars worth of leaning?”
He laughed, revealing a cracked tooth. “Who knows, he’s got a heart, but don’t tell him I told you.” He pulled his phone out of his pocket and glanced at the vibrating screen. “Speaking of the devil, he’s here now, let’s see what he says.”
“Yes,” I told Ralph, swinging around toward the wooden doors. “Let’s.”
“Watch your step,” Ralph told me. “I saw some loose nails around.”
I was so busy watching the ground that I didn’t realize Asher was standing there until I was directly in front of him. “Oh,” I said, startled. “Asher, what… what are you doing here?”
Was he here to tell me he didn’t mean what he said earlier? That he didn’t want me to stay away from him? That last night had meant something to him even if I wanted to pretend that it hadn’t?
As much as I hated it the idea thrilled me a little.
Even if it shouldn’t have.
“Oh,” Ralph said. “You two know each other?”
Of course, we knew each other, what else would he be doing here?
“Right here doesn’t look too bad, boss, but once you get inside you can see where the real work will begin.” Ralph took a few steps forward, motioning for Asher to follow him. “You really have to start in the back to get the full picture but the good news is this looks like the same kind of wood we used on Doc Logan’s barn, remember? I told you not to toss out that excess wood, knew it would come into handy some day.”
Ralph sounded so proud of himself but Asher was barely paying him any mind, his eyes locked on mine in the same smoldering way he had been looking at me since I got back.
My legs gave out a little bit under me and Asher reached out, steadying me easily before letting go of my body and following Ralph into the cloud of dust that was starting to surround us.
Asher couldn’t… Asher couldn’t be Ralph’s boss.
Clearly, there had to be some kind of mistake.
They were on the other side of the barn now, talking numbers and starting to take down measurements. I jolted to the other side of the venue, finally gaining some kind of composure. “What are you doing?”
“I’m looking at this property and drawing up an estimate.” Asher took the papers out of Ralph’s hand and started flipping through the pages. “It’s kind of my job.”
“You’re his boss?” I asked skeptically.
�
��That’s right,” Asher said cockily.
So he wasn’t there to make amends at all, he was just working.
“No way,” I said, startled. “I don’t… I don’t…”
“This whole wall needs to be replaced,” Asher said to Ralph, gesturing up and down. “And this one needs to be reworked and re-grouted into the ground.” He pointed downward. “See how it’s completely undone around the edges?”
Ralph nodded, scribbling away frantically.
“No!” I yelled, startling Ralph, Asher just gazed at me, bored. “No! I don’t… I want someone else to be in charge of this, there has to be someone else they can send me.”
“There isn’t,” Asher told me. “I’m in charge of development.”
“I’ll call your boss, I’ll ask for someone else!”
Ralph laughed. “Lady…”
Asher held his hand up, cutting him off. “No, it’s okay, Ralph, she’s free to call whoever she wants but it’ll be a waste of time. Things don’t get done without my approval on any project, me and the owners go way back.” He shrugged. “If you have a problem with it you can take your business elsewhere.”
My mouth hung open. “Fine! Maybe I will!”
“You can’t!” Ralph interrupted. “Doing that would be a wish for bankruptcy! Green Oats Corporation bought out the only other two contracting businesses in town, which means Asher will be on the team no matter who you call unless you want to get parts sent in from the next town over… hence the bankruptcy wish!” He was turning red with worry now, the innocence of his young age coming through.
“If she doesn’t want us to do the job, she doesn’t want us to do the job, Ralph.” Asher grabbed his tape measure off the ground and started to make his way back toward the front of the barn. “I’m sure she’ll figure it out.”
“But she has a low budget! And she’s in a hurry!”
Asher kept walking, not looking back. “Let’s go, Ralph.”
“She needs to get it done for her dad!” Ralph finally got the words that had been on the tip of his tongue out, turning the shade of a tomato in the process. “It’s for Mike, Asher.”
I jumped, startled.
Asher stopped in his tracks, turning to look at me.
“That’s it, right?” Ralph said slowly. “You want to make sure that the barn is fixed in case your dad wakes up? He’s been talking about fixing this place up forever, it only makes sense that you would be in a rush to do it, you know, just in case…” he trailed off, letting the words hang in the air.
I hadn’t realized he knew who I was until that very moment. I could feel Asher’s eyes on me, taking in every flinch of my body, every curve of my face, studying me. “When,” I said slowly.
“What?” Ralph frowned.
“You said in case,” I corrected. “When he wakes up.”
“Oh, right,” Ralph looked down. “When he wakes up.”
No one spoke for what felt like forever.
“Look,” I inhaled.
“We’ll start tomorrow,” Asher cut me off.
Ralph grinned. “She has a low budget! A really low one!”
I shot him a look.
“What?” He shrugged apologetically. “You do.”
“We’ll work it out,” Asher called out, still heading toward the door.
“Asher,” I called out. “Can you wait? Can we talk for a second?”
He stopped turning around and locked eyes on me. For a second I thought he was going to refuse and keep walking, all business, but after a second he looked at Ralph. “It’s okay, Ralph, head back to the office and start writing all this up in a file, I’ll meet you back there soon.”
Ralph grinned, patting me on the shoulder as he took off past me. “Told you he had a heart.”
When the doors swung shut behind Ralph Asher finally met my eyes.
“I need to get this done for my dad,” I said simply.
“I know that, Bella, I know that.”
“It’ll just be business…” I let my words hang in the air.
Asher snickered and dropped the bag of tools in his hand on the ground before closing the distance between us and pushing me against the wall of the barn. “Let’s get one thing straight, Bella, it’ll be business when I say it’s business and more than business what I say it’s more.”
Heat rose over my entire body.
It was going to be a long night.
Chapter Ten
Asher linked his hand through the back of my hair and brought my neck roughly to the side, placing his body over mine. He moved his lips to my neck, breathing heavily on me without letting me feel his touch. “I’m done playing games with you, Bella, done with the back and forth you keep forcing to go on in your mind because the truth is that every time I see you it’s hard to not rip your clothes off you.”
My heart started racing, sending compulsions in and out of my chest.
He ran his fingers over my lips, the same way he had that morning while nuzzling his head further into my body. “I know you want me just as bad as I want you, Bella, I know that you think about me… about touching me and being with me.” He opened his mouth and sucked on the arch of my neck.
I gasped, struggling to not grow wet.
“If we’re going to do this, really do this, you can play the whole hard to get mind game as much as you want, but right here, right now, in the darkness of this barn, you’re going to admit the truth, I want to hear you say it.” He slipped a hand around my waist and yanked me into his crotch.
His hard cock jammed itself into my thigh and I gasped.
It all came flooding back even more than before, his hands all over my body in the darkness of his room while he took me to places I had been dreaming about for as long as I could remember.
I wanted it again: I wanted him again.
So badly that it hurt.
I closed my eyes, concentrating on the placement of his hands, how they managed to hit the exact right places at the exact right moments. He pressed the edge of his fingertips under my shirt, rubbing the skin just above my waistline up and down.
I inhaled swiftly.
His hands felt so good; like they were made for me.
“Bella,” he said, continuing to tease me.
“I want you,” I whispered and then I thrust my center further into his hand, trying to prove my point. I felt like I might explode if I didn’t have him soon; if I didn’t feel him all over me soon.
Asher grinned, moaning into my hair softly. “I can’t hear you, Bella.”
My whole body shook in anticipation. “I want you, Asher.” I cleared my throat and moved my lips toward his. “I want you so bad it hurts.” I inhaled trying to catch my breath but it felt like I was about to pass out.
“Ugh,” he grimaced in frustration. “Louder, I want you to say it louder.”
“I want you, Asher! I want you now!” I screamed loudly, fed up with waiting.
He grumbled and then threw his lips on top of mine, pushing my body further into the wall roughly as he stuck his tongue inside of mine. His hands were in my hair, gripping me so tight that it felt like he was holding on for dear life.
I’d never been kissed like that in my entire life, so hungrily.
I gasped, jumping forward to wrap my legs around his waist.
Asher slipped his hands under my ass and pulled me closer to him, carrying my body across the barn to the stack of hay that lined the back wall. His fingers cupped my ass hard, sinking his fingertips deeply into my cheeks.
I wrapped my arms around his neck, not wanting to lose contact with his perfect body. His lips tasted like coffee and sex and his body smelled like cinnamon mixed with wood. I’d never tasted or smelled so much beauty rolled up in one person before.
I felt like I was high on the best kind of drug.
Asher dominated my mouth with his and a second later I felt his hands dip into the back of my jeans, running his hands over my butt cheeks before he gripped them hard.
I ju
mped in pleasure and he slammed my body down on a barrel of hay.
“Do you have any idea how long I’ve wanted sink my hands into that ass, Bella?” He pulled his shirt over his head and tossed it onto the ground, allowing his perfect stomach to shine brightly through the patch of sun coming in through the broken barn window above us.
My body shook with pleasure, so he had been checking out my ass.
“Probably not as long as I’ve wanted to feel that stomach,” I told him, surprising the both of us. I reached out, pulling him closer to me and running my fingers over his stomach eagerly.
They were just as nice as they’d been the night before.
Asher grinned and got on top of me, nibbling on my neck as he continued to grind his handsome frame into me. He opened his mouth and sucked on my neck deeply, moving his hard on up and down my body.
“Asher,” I linked my arms around his neck, moving my hips higher on him.
My petals felt like they were about to compress, ready to peel open at any moment. Something about his touch made me feel like I was going to cum on the spot; that was the effect he had on me. Once touch, one feel, and I felt hooked, ready to explode for him.
He held his body off, looking down from just over me. His eyes were filled with desire, just like mine were but he shook his head. “You need to wait, Bella, you need to control yourself.”
My lips swelled in frustration and response under him.
“Like that’s an easy task,” I mumbled.
“You think it is for me?” He leaned down and kissed me hard on the lips. “You drive me crazy, Bella, just the sight of you this morning made me hard.” He ground his body deeper into me. “I couldn’t get you out of my head all damn day.”
“Me either,” I admitted, running my hands over his pecks.
“Yeah?” He moved his lips to my ear. “Where did you think about me?” He moved his hand back and forth over my breasts. “Right here, Bella?” When I just moaned in response he moved his hand over my heart and pressed down. “Or right here?”
I bit down on my lip and nodded, admitting the truth without having to say it. Of course, he was in my heart and mind. He had been every damn day since we were kids, including all the days I had been away trying to forget about him.