“You think you are broken, boy?” his father shouted as his finger went into the air. “You have to marry a whore because she got her ass pregnant. Then you can talk to me about broken.”
“That’s enough!” I said as I glared at the white-haired old man who was not only insulting me but his son as well. “You will never talk that way to him again. That is his mother. I have no idea why you do what you do but he’s off limits now.”
“I can handle this,” Nic said as he took me by the waist and pulled me to him, kissing the side of my head. “This discussion is over, Father. And she’s right. The way you speak to me has to change. I want to hear no bad things said about my mother. She is a good woman after all. It’s you who should be called a whore.”
I gulped as I watched a vein start throbbing in his father’s forehead. “I will leave and you can be sure of one thing, Nicholai. You will not get to hold your place if you make decisions that will end the company your grandfather worked so hard to build and I worked hard to grow. You have two older brothers who would love a chance at running it. You are being foolish right now over this woman. My advice to you is to get her out of your system quickly or she will be your downfall.”
He left us standing there, holding onto each other as if we’d just weathered a massive storm and lived through it.
I had no idea what the right thing to do was but I had my eyes opened to what Nic had been through that had made him the man he was. And it was ugly, clean to the core.
NICHOLAI
Watching my father walk out the door, although he was shaking his head, I felt a shift in the universe. I had a woman at my side who’d defend me against him. To the Nicholas Grimm!
She was unafraid. Completely!
I was shaking with emotions I had never felt before. “You are one amazing woman, Natasha Greenwell. Even my own mother never stood up for me against him.”
She looked at me with sadness in her blue eyes. Her hand moved over my cheek as she looked at me. “We have so much to figure out, Nic.”
“We do. The main word there, being, we.” I pulled her around in front of me and kissed her with a passion I’d never felt before.
I had a partner. I’d never had one before. I had a woman who’d stay by my side and face the demons with me. She had to see, she and I were something neither of us saw coming.
I picked her up and carried her to my bedroom. She had her arms around my neck, gazing at me. “What are you doing?”
“I am taking you to my bed. A bed no woman has ever been in.” I kissed her as I took her into the hallway.
When our mouths parted she was looking into my eyes. “And what do you plan on doing to me when you get me in there?”
“Kissing you all over and making love to you, Natasha. I want to make love to you. I want nothing between us. I want your skin on mine and I want to feel you. All of you.” I kissed her again as I pushed the door to my bedroom open with my foot.
Her mouth was working with mine to deepen the kiss we shared. It was the first real kiss I’d ever had. A shared kiss. No domination on either side. Just a coalition bent on the same purpose. To express our care for one another.
As I laid her down on my bed, I gazed in awe at how beautiful she looked in my bed. I’d never allowed any woman in my bedroom at all. She was the first and from what I thought at that time, the only woman who would ever grace my sanctuary.
She swallowed then said, “This was in my new set of rules. Once a week, at the very least, I wanted to make love with you.” Her eyes glistened and I kissed a tear that had managed to escape, away from her rose-petal-soft cheek.
I pulled her clothes off her in a slow fashion, touching her exposed body with a reverence I hadn’t before. The truth was I’d never made love before. I’d laid out specific plans for how I was going to take a woman but I’d never relied on going on instinct alone.
After undressing her, I stood back and took my clothes off as she watched me. Her gaze told me she admired my physique. But there was more there than mere lust in those blue eyes. I saw it. She cared for me.
Before I touched her, I told her words I’d never uttered before. “I think I love you, Natasha.”
Her lips went up in a half smile. “That’s funny. I think I love you too, Nic.”
My heart fluttered in my chest as I laid my body down next to hers and stroked her bare stomach as I looked into her eyes. It was as if I was in a dream. That could never be my real life. No woman could ever tame me, break me, call me hers.
Natasha was not a normal woman, in my opinion. She was more than any woman I’d ever known. My money did not make her cave to me so she could have as much of it as I’d bestow upon her. My looks didn’t bring her to her knees in hopes of getting to lay her hands on me.
She was something else. She was the one for me and I was beginning to get that cemented into my stubborn head. Her body trembled as I moved my hands over it.
It was not from fear this time it was from pure unadulterated emotion. She was falling for me. I knew she was from the very start. I could see it in her eyes.
The bond agreement would never work with a woman like her. She was not made to be broken. My plans for her had changed when she showed me that side of her. The protectiveness she had for me was a thing I never even knew I’d like.
But then again, no one had ever been protective over me. Not even my parents. I recalled being bullied in the schoolyard by a boy three years older than the 11-year-old I was then. When I came home with a black eye and busted lip, my father spanked me.
My mother turned away from the scene, leaving me to him. After he spanked me many times, he told me I was to stand up to that boy and if I came home hurt by him again, he’d add to the punishment.
I had no choices then. I had to become brutal if I was to come home unscathed by the older and bigger boy. My father had not taught me how to defend myself in the least. He acted as if I should’ve instinctively known.
That instinct had not kicked in. If there was one at all. I went to school with a rock in my backpack. I put it in a side pocket so I could easily get to it. I knew if I held that rock in my hand my punch would carry more weight and when that boy called to me to face him, yet again. I did so with the rock in my hand.
His face was a bloody mess by the time I stopped and I was unharmed. As I left that schoolyard with kids cheering for me, it was not victory I felt. It was defeat. I had become something my father would be proud of and that made me sick inside.
That feeling just grew as I grew older and found the ways he demanded I be, always brought more sickness to my soul. When I was only 15-years-old, he brought a woman to my bedroom and simply pushed her inside, then closed the door.
I had no idea why he’d done such a thing until the woman came to me and showed me exactly why she was there. My first tutor in the sexual subject. And she was to teach me to lord over her. Not make love to her or her to me. She taught me the ways of my father’s world and I grew sicker inside.
She made me spank her when I did not want to. She made me act like an animal as I plunged my cock into her stinking depths of wet heat. I hated her but more so, I hated my father.
My older brothers clamored for my father’s attention. They have always had hard feelings for me because my father married my mother and he never married theirs. My brothers have two different mothers. It seemed my father never wanted to have more than one child with any woman.
Their mothers came before his tryst in the BBC with my mother which carried rules for such things as pregnancies, else he’d have never made an honest woman of her either.
My mother was a nice woman when my father was not around. She’d do nice things for me and she’d even slip in the word, love, sometimes. A thing my father never allowed, as in his opinion, it would make me soft and he’d never have a soft son. Not Nicholas Grimm!
The touch of her hand moving over my cheek brought me out of my inner thoughts. “You look like you’re a million miles away,
Nic. You can talk to me you know. You can tell me anything you want or need to. I’m here for you. Use my ear to your advantage, my prince.”
As I gazed down at her from my raised position, I could feel it enveloping me. The feeling that would be my demise. Complete love for another human being. The straw that would break my father’s back.
NATASHA
For hours we laid in that bed, caressing one another as Nic told horror story after horror story about his childhood. I thought I had a traumatic childhood but his blew mine out of the water.
No tears ever left his eyes when he told me the horrible things he’d been put through. But at times unshed tears shimmered in his dark eyes and brought feelings to the surface I’d been tamping down.
It was bad. I was in love with the man by the time he finished his tale that wasn’t nearly all of his life. I kissed him with compassion when he was done and he kissed me back with hope.
I could feel it welling up inside of him. He had hope that life wasn’t all he thought it was. Darkness was not all there was. There was light and he had hope I’d show it to him.
I wanted to make things better for him more badly than I had ever wanted anything. Our bodies moved together as one entity. Not merely to get all the pleasure we could ring out of the sexual act. No, that time, the first time we’d ever made love, was different.
All of the emotion he’d been taught to ignore, came to the surface. His touch was soft and gentle. The way his hands moved over my body was fluid-like. He was a river washing over me and together we cleansed one another of the things that had tarnished us.
I had my secrets too and I wasn’t quite ready to talk about them at that time. Mine were still too deeply covered to come up to the surface at that time. They’d show their ugliness later, though.
But then it was like a rainbow was over us, protecting us from the evils of the world while we showed one another what love is. His body felt better than I thought it would as his massive muscles rippled over my soft curves.
Our breathing was like a symphony with high sounds and low sounds and he not once told me a thing about being quiet. He actually said the opposite, “The way you sound makes my heart quiver. I can tell by the way your body is moving in unison with mine and your face glows with emotion that you mean the sounds you’re making. It’s a thing of great beauty.”
I wanted to weep with his words but I didn’t. I kept them closed up inside of me and merely nodded in agreement. “You are a wonderful love maker, Nic.”
“Who knew?” he asked with a chuckle.
His deep laugh shook his body, vibrating mine as he did. Our love went on and on the whole night long. We’d sleep in short spurts but one or the other of us would wake the other with soft kisses, coos, and caresses. It was more beautiful than I even dreamt it would be and I had dreamt about it.
It felt cemented, our love. It felt real. I’d never felt anything like it. But I knew, even in that state of pure emotion, that things would never go easy for us.
His father was obviously against me and I knew he’d detest the new way Nic would be with me. I knew that dominance was far behind him where I was concerned. His father would hate me, even more, when he saw the softness between us.
And I knew my father wouldn’t be happy either. My father was very demanding as well. I suppose one doesn’t get into the FBI while being soft and easy going. My father was neither of those things.
I’d seen my father be more than brutal. It was a scary thing to witness and what made that worse was the man he’d hurt more than necessary was innocent of what I’d accused him of.
I had lied to hurt a man because of teenage lust and it had cost that man his family and more. My father’s fury was such that I never told the truth about it.
No authorities were ever told about what I’d accused the man of. My father took care of it in his own way rather than let the authorities investigate the crime I accused the man of.
Not a day goes by I don’t think about what I did. Not a single day.
NICHOLAI
Soft wisps of her silky blonde hair tickled my nose as I cuddled her from behind. Never had I done such a thing. A sleepy smile broke my lips as I thought about all we’d done during the night. How crazy it all was and how the new day would find us.
We were wrapped in the sheets which were a mess. Kissing the back of her neck to wake her up, I found my cock getting hard again and could hardly believe it. We’d made love for so long and so often that night, I thought I’d be spent up of any juices to create another erection.
I was wrong though and as she turned in my arms with a delightful groan I could tell we were going to do it again. Her sleepy face was slightly puffy and her hair was a mess and she’d never looked more beautiful as I knew it was my love which had her in such a state.
“Good morning, my princess,” I greeted her then kissed her swollen lips. Mine were swollen as well and when mine touched hers it sent a shiver down my spine.
She moaned and wrapped her arms around me, throwing one leg over mine and moving her body to mine until I was solidly inside of her. I cannot explain what it felt like to hold her that way. It was beyond comparison and I knew no one would ever make me feel that comfortable again. She was the only one who could.
“After this, we have to get up, shower and get to work,” I told her as I moved steadily back and forth as she did too.
“Okay,” she kissed my cheek then whispered, “Master.”
I chuckled with her word. “I prefer to be called your prince now if you don’t mind?”
Her eyes opened and she gazed at me as her hand moved through my hair. “My prince. That you are, Nic. My sweet, sweet, Nicholai.”
“I am your sweet Nicholai, Natasha. And you are my sweet princess.”
Our bodies rocked together in an easy fashion. Not passionate, not heated, just comfortable bliss the likes I’d never known existed. When our orgasms came at the same time, I knew we were set. I could’ve married that woman that very day and never thought another thing about it.
But we had at least one man who would be against us and that man had a lot of power over me. I was not fool enough to think I could completely break away from his hand.
Then there would be her father to contend with too. I also wasn’t foolish enough to think he would easily accept our union. But by God, I was going to give it all I had to make them both understand, we were going to be together come hell or high water. I just didn’t know we’d actually have to go through that.
Once our bodies had finished giving to other’s what it needed, I took her to the shower and cleaned her hair and her body as she cleaned mine. Another thing I’d never done in quite the way we were doing. Soft, gentle touches followed by kisses full of love, not lust.
I found myself saying the words I knew she should hear from me. “I love you, Natasha.”
Her eyes sparkled as she said, “I love you, Nic.”
It was a done deal. We were a couple. Not bound by anything but our love for one another. I could hardly believe it but it was true. I was a changed man in the matter of one night of love making.
“We have to get you a passport if you don’t have one. You’re going to be my personal assistant for the trip to Bangkok.” I rinsed her hair out after shampooing it.
Her smile was shy as she said, “I have one. I got it for a cruise my family went on last year. I’ve heard that place is a den of inequity, Nic.”
“It is,” I said then kissed her neck.
“Perhaps you could show me some more of what you did at the show the other night. I have to admit I found that very stimulating.”
Surprise didn’t fill me as I knew she was into darker things than she liked to claim she was. But that would be another country where no one knew her to judge her. “I can show you things to entice you if you want me to.”
Her eyes were bright as she said, “I want you to. I found that very much to my liking. I don’t want to stop doing that. You still want
to, don’t you?”
“We’ll have to lay low with the BBC while your father is around. Speaking of him, I need you to forgo any classes you have today and come to work with me. I need you there for the meeting he wants to have. And you do recall how we met, in the little lie we’ll tell him, right?” I ran my hands full of coconut scented conditioner through her long hair as she looked at me.
“We met when I interviewed to be your intern. Of course, I remember that. And just what do you think my presence at that meeting will accomplish?”
“I think it will accomplish more than if you weren’t there. And our news will throw your father off a bit, I’m sure. We’ll have to play it as it goes along.” I rinsed her hair out as she looked at me with a thoughtful look in her eyes.
“Play it by ear, huh?” she asked. “That doesn’t sound like you at all.”
“I have to admit, it doesn’t. But with your help, perhaps we can get the FBI to get off our backs, if only for a little while. I could use the ease in pressure. Especially since now I know my father will be on the war path with me.”
Her eyes fell away from mine. “How bad is that going to be?”
“I have no idea with that man. I just know, I want you with me to be able to protect you from anything he might pull. Nothing is beyond him.”
Sadness covered her face and it made me mad. “So, essentially, I am still your slave as my freedom is a thing that could get me hurt, is that what you’re saying?”
I took her chin in my hand and made her look at me. “You know you’re not a slave to me. You are mine but I am also yours. For now, until my father realizes I will not bend to his will, you are safer with me. So things will go the way I’d planned if you’d signed the bond. Only the new clothes will not go in the other room as planned. They will come into mine. We will share that room. We will share it for a very long time, I hope.”
“This is turning out better than I hoped it would,” she said and I had to nod in agreement with her.
The Surgeon’s Secrets Page 17