by SJ McCoy
He held his hand out to her. “Do you want to walk?”
The dusk was settling over the vineyards—the last of the reds and purples fading to blue and gray. “I’d love to.” She wasn’t going to wonder if this was a standard move—a romantic walk to get a girl in the mood. She took hold of his hand, and he led her around the side of the house and out into the vineyards beyond.
“Do you walk the vines often?” he asked.
Mary Ellen shook her head. She knew it was something Chelsea loved to do, and Cameron went out at least once a week to check the grapes and check in with the foremen and chat with the laborers.
Antonio looked puzzled, if not disappointed.
“I don’t feel as though I know enough,” she explained.
That just made him look even more puzzled.
“I know I work with wine, I love to drink it, I can tell you about all the processes, but out here I feel like an imposter. It’s not in my veins, not like you and Cam and Chelsea. For me it’s all learned from books.”
Antonio smiled and held her hand tighter, leading her down a row of vines. “That’s all the more reason you should come out here. Get to know the land, the vines, the grapes themselves.” He stopped and cupped a handful of leaves gently to sniff them. Then he gestured for her to do the same.
She felt a little self-conscious as she leaned forward. Was he teasing her? Each grape had its own smell, she knew that much, but leaves didn’t smell, did they? She was surprised to discover that they did. They smelled like springtime, and she smiled up at him. “Wow.”
He nodded. “Get to know them, spend time with them, you’ll learn to appreciate them, and then you won’t feel like an outsider anymore. You’ll feel like you belong.” He smiled down at her. “And I think you do.”
Oh. When he smiled like that it made her wish she did belong—with him. His face was so handsome—and so familiar, she’d pictured it so often over the last few years, but the expression on his face, the tenderness of his big brown eyes made her wonder again what it would be like if he actually cared about her.
She sucked in a deep breath as he let go of the leaves and moved his hand to cup her cheek. The feel of his fingers on her skin sent heat-waves rushing through her.
“I believe you do belong here,” he murmured as he lowered his lips to hers.
She couldn’t make her brain focus on what he might mean by that. All coherent thoughts fled as his arm slid around her waist, drawing her to him. He kissed even better than she’d imagined. His lips were warm and soft, his body hard. His arms felt strong around her, and that was all she was aware of as she parted her lips to kiss him back. His tongue explored her mouth, and she clung to his shoulders to keep herself upright. She’d never thought of herself as the swooning type, but his kiss made her knees buckle.
It was a long time before they came up for air, and she didn’t want to even then. She could have kissed him like that all night. He lifted his head but kept his arms tight around her. “You do.”
She cocked her head to one side, not understanding. “I do what?”
He raised an eyebrow, then shook his head slightly. “Kiss better than anyone I’ve ever known. I always thought you might.”
She didn’t know what to say. Had he really ever spent time wondering how she might kiss? She’d certainly wondered about him, but to think that he …? No. She smiled. “I’ll bet you say that to all the girls.”
He gave her a rueful smile. “Believe what you like.”
~ ~ ~
Antonio took her hand again and walked on. This was one of his very favorite places on earth. He walked out here almost every day. Some people went to church. Some people meditated. He walked the vines. Alone. He’d wanted to bring her out here, and he was glad he had. He’d brought a couple of women out here over the years but usually regretted it. Sharing this place was like sharing a piece of his soul. Women in the past had missed the point entirely. Mary Ellen didn’t really get it either. But she felt right out here. She wasn’t chattering away, oblivious how important this was to him, nor was she feigning some connection that she didn’t feel. She’d been honest with him. She didn’t feel like she belonged. He could understand that. Wine might not flow in her veins like it did with his family, but he was starting to believe that she could belong here and that he wanted her to.
The sky was almost dark now; he looked up at the first stars twinkling down on them. It felt like a sign. He slung his arm around her shoulders as they walked on, wanting to feel her closeness. The blood rushed to his pants as her full breast brushed against his chest. Resisting temptation wasn’t normally his thing, but he was determined that tonight he would manage it. Mary Ellen wasn’t the type to sleep with him on the first date, and not even attempting to would mark this as something new and special for him.
“How old were you when you first came here?” she asked.
“I don’t really know. When we were kids, we split all our time between Sicily and here. We went to grade school over there and spent all the holidays here, then we came here for high school and went back every summer.”
Mary Ellen nodded, looking thoughtful. “So, do you think of yourself as American or Sicilian?”
“Both.” He smiled. “I feel like I belong wherever I am.”
“That must be nice.”
“You should try it. It’s a good feeling. Right now, imagine that you belong right here.” He tightened his arm around her shoulders. When he said right here, he meant by his side, and he, too, was imagining how that would feel. He liked it.
The look she gave him suggested that she understood what he meant, but didn’t quite believe it. She looked around and then back at him. “I think it would be wonderful to belong here. I can imagine it, but …” She shrugged. “This isn’t where my life has taken me.”
He wished there wasn’t a but. He wanted her to be able to imagine her life being here with him. But this was their first date, after all. He had time. He loved the idea, but they were just getting started. He didn’t need to push things along. “I believe life can take us wherever we want to go—if we want it enough.”
She looked up at him, and he wondered again if she understood what he was really saying.
“Tell me about your life. Where did you grow up? How did you get into the wine business?”
She smiled. “I’m afraid my childhood wasn’t as glamorous as yours. I grew up in suburbia in Ohio. I went to college in Oregon and got interested in wine while I was there. I worked at a small winery in the Willamette Valley. I loved it there, but …” She shrugged. “Things went bad, and I applied for the job with Hamilton-Groves. The rest, as they say, is history.”
“So, did you work with David?” Antonio wished he hadn’t asked, but he never had been able to keep his questions to himself.
She nodded and stepped away from him. “Yeah, we met at work. He was one of the sales reps, and I was assistant to the CEO.” She made a face. “We got engaged, then he met the CEO’s daughter, and apparently, she was a better opportunity for him than I was.”
Antonio slid his arm around her waist and drew her back to him. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to upset you.”
She smiled brightly, but she felt tense. “You didn’t.”
He slid his hand up her back and closed his fingers around the back of her neck, stroking the soft skin under her hair. “I’m sorry he hurt you, but as I told him, I’m grateful that he did.” She looked up into his eyes, and he nodded. “I am. Where would you be now if you’d married him?”
She pursed her lips and shook her head.
“All I know is that you wouldn’t be standing here with me.” He dropped a kiss on her forehead and smiled. “I’m sorry he hurt you, but I’ll be forever grateful to him.” He lowered his head to hers. He needed to kiss her, to tell her how glad he was that she was here with him now. His lips brushed thin air as she pulled away with a frown.
“It’s very sweet of
you to say all that, but come on.”
“Come on?”
“Cut the bullshit, would you? I’m not some starstruck tourist, and I’m certainly no model or actress. You don’t need to dream up the perfect lines that you think a woman wants to hear. Not with me. You don’t need to feed me lines to get me into bed.”
Antonio stepped back. She might as well have slapped him. He’d been honest with her, and she thought he was playing her. He took a deep breath. He could see why she might believe that. “I’m sorry. I’m not feeding you lines. I know better than that—I know you wouldn’t fall for them. I was telling you the truth.”
She pursed her lips.
“I was. Perhaps with time, you’ll come to believe me.”
She blew out a sigh. “I think with very little time, we’ll have bonked each other’s brains out and be on our way. All I ask is that you don’t feed me bullshit. I don’t like it, and I don’t need it.”
He smiled. He couldn’t help it. She wasn’t going to make any of this easy for him. “I promise you. I will feed you no bullshit. Can I ask you to promise me something?”
“What?”
“Promise me you’ll keep an open mind? Give me a chance? How would you feel right now if you believed everything I’ve told you?”
He watched her think it over. “If I honestly believed that you thought I belong here? If I believed that you were grateful to David for setting me free, so I could be with you?”
He nodded and waited.
She shook her head, but he could see the hint of a smile playing on her lips. “If I believed all of that were true, I think I’d be happy.” She met his gaze and nodded. “I would; I’d be happy.”
He was thrilled—there was hope.
“But I don’t believe it,” she added when she saw his grin.
“Not yet, but will you promise me that you’ll stay open to the possibility?”
She narrowed her eyes. “You want me to stay open to your bullshit?”
He laughed. “I promise you, it’s not bullshit.”
“So, you’re telling me that we’re going to date and you’re going to magically and miraculously fall in love with me?”
He drew in a deep breath. He had a sneaking suspicion he was already falling for her, but this may not be the time to admit it. Instead, he nodded. “Stay open to the possibility?”
She shook her head. “I’m sorry, but that’s too ridiculous for words.”
“No. It isn’t. Anything’s possible. You never know; you might even fall for me.”
Her head shot up, and her eyes widened, a reaction that surprised him—he’d half expected her to laugh.
“Do you concede that’s possible?”
She nodded slowly. “Like you said. Anything’s possible.”
~ ~ ~
Mary Ellen was quiet in the car on the way back. He was taking her home. He hadn’t even suggested that they should go inside the house, visit the apartment that he kept there. She was kind of glad of that now. She’d felt icky when he’d said all that stuff about being grateful to David. Guys didn’t talk like that, not unless they were telling a woman what they thought she wanted to hear. And the only reason they told women what they wanted to hear was in order to get on their good side, to get something they wanted—usually sex. She’d been disappointed to think that he was just using the right words to get what he wanted. She’d started to relax with him, to feel like they were friends. She stared out the window. She couldn’t bring herself to believe the other possibility—the possibility that he was telling the truth. That he really was that into her, that he was glad she wasn’t with David anymore, and that he truly could see her belonging at the winery—with him.
She watched the stars twinkle in the dark sky above. Was it really possible that he could somehow fall for her? She doubted it. What she didn’t doubt was that, as he’d suggested, she could let herself fall for him—if she wasn’t careful. She didn’t need to worry. She'd taught herself to be very careful around men. She’d dealt with heartbreak once, she had no intention of having to deal with it ever again.
Antonio reached across and took hold of her hand. “Are you okay? You’re very quiet over there.”
“I’m fine.” She smiled back at him. “How about you? Has this evening been a disappointment for you? Are you going to drop me home and then go find someone who will go for your lines?”
He gave her a rueful smile. “What happened to that open mind you were going to have?”
She laughed. “I’m struggling with that.”
“Okay. How about you just give me some time, then? Let me prove to you that I’m not full of it.”
She raised an eyebrow. “You want to do this again?”
“I do. Tomorrow night?”
“Okay, but don’t worry if you get a better offer. I’ll understand.”
He brought the car to a stop in front of her apartment building and cut the engine, then turned to look at her. “I won’t understand if you do.”
She had to smile. If she didn’t know him, she might be fooled by the dark look he gave her. She might believe that he was the jealous Italian he appeared to be. “All I had planned for tomorrow night was a bubble bath.”
He smiled. “That could still be arranged.”
She laughed.
“I mean, at my place. After dinner.”
Mary Ellen pressed her lips together, hoping he couldn’t see the effect that thought had on her.
He didn’t seem to notice; he was too busy unfastening his seat belt and getting out of the car. Oh. So, he planned to come in with her now? Why not? She went to open her door, but he was there opening it for her and helping her out. She fished her keys out of her purse and let them into the lobby.
She didn’t know what to say as they waited for the elevator. This wasn’t a situation she’d found herself in a very long time. She felt embarrassed and excited at the same time. She was finally going to sleep with Antonio Di Giovanni—the real-life version.
She was so nervous, she jumped when the elevator dinged. He smiled and gestured for her to enter ahead of him. They rode up in silence, and she was a little disappointed that they weren’t all over each other. She’d imagined him to be the kind who’d have a girl pressed up against the wall, hot kisses, hands everywhere. He must be saving it for when they made it to her apartment—she hoped.
Her keys jingled in her hand as she unlocked the door. She pushed it open and looked up at him, not sure what to say, wishing he’d make it easy for her.
He smiled down at her and tucked his fingers under her chin, tilting her head back. This was it, here came the passionate kiss that would ignite everything. No. He planted a chaste kiss on her lips and stepped back. “I’ll pick you up tomorrow … does seven work?”
She nodded mutely, stunned that he was leaving. He lifted her hand and kissed her knuckles. “Ciao, bella.”
She stood in the doorway and watched him walk back to the elevator. When he reached it, he turned around and smiled.
“You don’t want to …?” She couldn’t believe she’d asked, but she couldn’t help it.
He nodded solemnly. “I want to, bella. You have no idea how much I want to.”
For some reason, her disappointment came out as anger. “Oh, I think I get the idea. After all, you’re there.” As if to reinforce her point, the elevator announced its arrival with a ding and the doors slid open. “I’m here. Goodnight.”
She turned to go inside, shocked at her outburst. She doubted she would see him tomorrow after that. It turned out she didn’t need to wait that long. He was back at her door before she had chance to close it. He closed his arms around her and backed her against the wall, just like she’d imagined in the elevator. He claimed her mouth in a kiss that left no room for doubt whatsoever. Even if she hadn’t been convinced by that kiss, the feel of his hard-on pushing between her legs told her in no uncertain terms, that yes, he did want her. His hands
roved over her, and her arms reached up around his neck, clinging on for dear life as he swept her away with a kiss she knew she’d never forget.
When he finally lifted his head, they were both breathing hard. He placed his hands on the wall on either side of her head but continued to rest the weight of his body against her. She closed her eyes and tried to calm her racing heart. All she could feel was his hot, hard cock pushing between her legs.
He smiled. “Just to be clear, I’m trying to be a gentleman here. I wasn’t feeding you lines to get you into bed earlier. You can be certain of that because I made a promise to myself that I wouldn’t even try to get you into bed. Not tonight.” His brown eyes held an intensity she hadn’t seen in them before. She felt it, too. She wanted to take him by the hand, lead him into her bedroom and explore the passion that was crackling in the air between them.
“I want you,” she breathed. At this point, she had no shame. She had nothing but desire to finally be with him.
He claimed her mouth again, kissing her senseless before all too quickly lifting his head again. “I want you.” He closed his hand around her breast, making a low moan escape from her lips. He rocked his hips, making her move in time with him. “You have to know how much I want you. But a promise is a promise, bella. Not tonight. Tomorrow. Will you come to me tomorrow?”
She nodded, and he cupped her face between his hands, kissing her deeply one more time. “Goodnight, Mary Ellen.” He turned and left.
Once she’d closed the door, she leaned back against it. Her hands were shaking, and she was out of breath. She went through to the bedroom and looked at herself in the mirror. “Tomorrow,” she told herself. Tonight, she would no doubt toss and turn for hours, wishing he’d stayed and wondering if he could possibly have meant even half of what he’d said. Part of her thought he might be playing some horrible game with her, but that was just fear and insecurity talking, and she knew it. The rest of her was half afraid, half excited about what might be happening between them.
Chapter Seven
Antonio pushed his chair back from his desk and ran his hands through his hair. He’d thought that coming into the office would help distract him, but it seemed that nothing could. It was now two-thirty on Saturday afternoon. Fourteen and a half hours since he’d somehow managed to walk away from Mary Ellen’s apartment. Four and a half hours until he’d see her again—until he could make up for what he hadn’t done last night. He’d thought he was doing the right thing, thought he was respecting her, being honorable. The look on her face when he’d left and the ache in his balls ever since told him that what he’d been was stupid. He could have stayed, could have spent the night with her, learning her, loving her, getting to know every inch of her body, tasting her creamy skin. He balled his fists and banged them together. He hadn’t done it. He needed to stop thinking about it for the next four and a half hours. Then he would make damned sure he made up for it.