by Jenna Moreci
Tobias’s face fell. “Yes.”
Tears prodded at Her, but She resisted. It didn’t matter what they did together. It wasn’t Her concern. She held Her breath, Her only means of self-control.
“I left to be with you,” Tobias continued. “So I could make things right. I was only there for a moment—”
“A quick performer, are we?”
“What?” He furrowed his brow. “No, you don’t understand—”
“Oh, I understand completely.”
“That’s not what happened.”
“It’s awfully audacious of you,” She said. “Coming here after you’ve fucked Cosima.”
“I didn’t fuck Cosima! Dammit, you have to listen to me!”
“Why? You didn’t listen to me the last time we spoke.”
“I know.” His shoulders slumped. “I’m so sorry.”
Her heart lodged into Her throat. “I want you to leave.” She cocked Her head at the door. “Go.”
“I’m not leaving.”
“Fine, then I’ll just pretend you’re not here.” She turned toward Her desk as Her tears fought for control. Stop it. The crystal rose taunted Her.
Precious dove, I’d do anything for You.
“I didn’t fuck Cosima. I hate Cosima.” Tobias’s voice softened. “But I did kiss Her.”
Leila’s eyes clenched shut, Her nails digging into the woodgrain of Her desk.
“I didn’t want to.” His words piled on top of one another. “You need to believe me, I didn’t want to. When I kiss Her, I feel a sickness. A loathing for myself. For betraying you.”
“You can kiss whomever you like. I have no claim on you.”
“And that’s the next thought in my mind: that I’m not yours. And that realization—that understanding—it breaks my bones. It kills me.” He came in closer. “I swear, I’m not lying to you. She cornered me, wouldn’t take no for an answer.”
Leila went rigid. What?
“And when I rejected Her advances, She accused me of straying,” he continued. “Said She’d speak to Brontes—”
Leila spun toward him. “Brontes?”
“She said my behavior was suspect.” His expression turned bleak, his skin wan. “That She’d find this other woman and do something about her. I feared She’d find out about you. That you’d be punished, or killed—”
“Dammit, She already knows.”
Tobias froze. “She knows?”
“She’s known this whole time. She fucking knows.”
He stared at Her, lips parted. “Then…why did She proposition me?”
“Because She’s a traitorous bitch!”
Leila snatched up the crystal rose and launched it at the far wall. Shards sprayed across the floor, and She could’ve sworn She saw Herself in each and every one of them, broken and discarded.
“God, how did it all go so wrong?” She surrendered to Her tears, caving into Herself. “This tournament. I’ve lost my sister. I’ve lost you.”
“You haven’t lost me. I’m right here.”
“I trusted you,” She spat. “Made sacrifices for you. Took risks that left me vulnerable. And you repay me with contempt. I trusted you, and you crushed me.”
“I’m so sorry.”
A sob escaped Her, and Tobias’s arms swept around Her waist, pulling Her close. “No, no,” he whispered. “Please don’t cry.”
“Don’t touch me.” She tore free from him.
His eyes welled. “Tell me how to fix this. Tell me how, and I’ll do it. Do you need me to beg?” He dropped to his knees. “I’ll beg, Leila. I’ll beg.”
“Tobias—”
“I need you.” He took Her hands. “I let doubt and fear cloud my instincts, but I see things clearly now. And I see you. I’ve always seen you.”
Black and blue tore from his flesh, a vision of heartache. She closed Her eyes, freeing Herself from his pain only to wallow in Her own.
“Leila, I’ve racked my brain and come up with nothing,” he said. “There is no answer—no outcome that leads me to you. Yet still, I can’t marry Cosima. I choose you. Even if it’s impossible, it’s the choice I’m making. And I will reap whatever consequence it brings. But I can’t be with Cosima. I can only be with you.”
She couldn’t fight Her tears, the wall within washed away. Every impulse urged Her to scoop him up, to love him, but She remained still.
Tobias deflated. “God, this is it. I’ve literally ruined everything.”
“No,” Leila choked out. “This is my fault.”
“It’s not.”
“It is.”
“I’m a fool.” He stared up at Her, defenseless. “I’ve made so many stupid decisions, and I’m willing to pay whatever price comes from them. But I’m not willing to lose you.”
“Tobias, you don’t know what you’re talking about.”
“You’re wrong. You need to know, I decided to end us due to fear and coercion. I thought I was endangering you. It was never what I wanted. You are all I’ve wanted.”
She shook Her head. “God, there’s so much you don’t know. And I fear your reaction when you discover it.”
“You have me regardless. No matter what is said and done, you have me.” He pressed Her hand to his chest, his heart thumping against Her palm. “It’s yours. I’m yours. And all that’s left is for you to be mine.”
Fire bombarded Her touch, bright and blazing. Holy light. No, this was different—strong enough to blind Her, an amalgamation of every color, all within Tobias. It bled from his chest, building with each beat of his heart, then seeped through Her veins, filling the empty places within Her. She was warm. Whole.
Loved.
“Please, Leila.” His voice wavered. “Say you’ll be mine. Please.”
The light surged through him, its message singular.
He loves Me.
“I’ll be yours,” She said.
Tobias choked. “You will?”
“I will.”
He leapt to his feet, wrapping Her in his arms. A wonderful ache pulsed in Her chest, and She became free in his embrace.
“I’ll earn your forgiveness,” he said. “I’ll never be so stupid again, I swear it.” He wiped Her cheeks. “Leila, please don’t cry.”
“Oh, shut up, you’re crying too.”
“But I deserve it. This trouble is all my doing, I have no one to blame but myself.”
“That’s not true,” She said. “I should’ve been frank with you. I should’ve told you everything weeks ago, the moment you entered the palace.”
“No, stop it.”
“I’m so sorry—”
“Leila, hear me. You are my greatest gift—the one beacon of light in this hellish place.” He grabbed Her hand, bringing it to his chest. “You are mine. And you should apologize for nothing.”
Pearlescent light—Tobias’s love. She threw Her arms around his neck and kissed him, drinking up his adoration and giving him all of Hers in return.
“I want to hear everything,” he said. “Whatever you have to say. I’ll listen intently. I won’t say a word.” He took Her face in his hands. “Are we all right?”
She gave a hasty nod. “Yes, darling…”
Her words disappeared within a kiss, their bodies melding into one another. Everything She’d wanted was at Her fingertips—Tobias’s soft touch, his deep voice, the colors beating through him. Tremors rolled within Her, quickening Her pulse.
She had his love. Now all She wanted was him.
Taking his hand, She guided him along the seam of Her robe, down to the knotted belt at Her waist. She loosened it, and the robe swayed open, an invitation.
Tobias’s eyes panned down Her exposed flesh, then widened. “Oh my God, you’re naked.”
“Not quite.” She forced the words out. “But I could be…”
Tobias stared at Her, stunned. Her breathing hitched.
His lips plowed into Hers, a shock of a kiss that nearly threw Her backward. He wanted Her; it oozed
from his hands raking up Her back, from his labored breathing, from the hard bulge digging into Her groin. She pulled him to the bed, groping and stumbling until they collapsed onto the sheets.
Tobias sank into Her, grinding against Her body, a wicked temptation. With a quick tug, She yanked his pants down and latched onto his ass—firm and tight, just as She had imagined. He wriggled and writhed, freeing himself from the confines of his clothing, and She took in his carved form, his bronze skin fading a shade or two at his waistline.
His cock.
A gasp swelled in Her throat. It was staring right at Her. Long, smooth.
Spectacular.
She kissed him hard, ravenous in a way She’d never known before. I saw his cock. It filled the corners of Her mind, igniting Her fantasies, leaving Her burning up and wet. With a grab and a roll, Tobias flipped Her on top of him, ripping Her robe free and tossing it aside. So strong. So bold. His palpable gaze swept Her naked body.
“Oh my God, you’re so beautiful.” His eyes lit up. “Oh my God, you’re perfect.”
His hands followed the path of his gaze, tracing Her hips, massaging Her breasts. Delicate waves fluttered within Her at each nip and caress, rippling beneath Her skin. His mouth moved from Her breasts to Her neck, and the pleasure surged in heavy pulses, a beating drum between Her legs. She grabbed hold of his cock, giving long, firm strokes. Like polishing silver Faun once said, and She must’ve been right, as Tobias groaned into Leila’s ear, gripping tight at Her ass. His hands and lips molded Her like clay, an artist through and through. She craved more.
Tobias broke free from their kiss. “Leila, I need you to know, all I want is you. I don’t want The Savior. I’ve never wanted The Savior. I just want you. I…”
The fire within Her died.
She hadn’t told him.
“Leila?” Tobias said.
He doesn’t know. Her heartbeat reignited, lit with something ugly. Fearful.
Tobias’s eyes widened. “No no no, wait, what happened?”
Her tears erupted. She rolled off him, cowering beneath a sheet.
“Was it something I said?” He hovered close. “If it’s what I said, I take it back.”
“God, you don’t understand.”
“You’re right, I don’t understand. I’m very, very confused.”
She spoke between sobs. “You have me utterly terrified.”
“No, that’s not what I wanted. Please, I hate to see you cry.”
I don’t want The Savior. The words replayed in Her mind, along with the taunts of Her father. She winced, forcing past the torment. “Nothing’s changed. We’ve made up, but the problem’s still there. Nothing’s fixed.”
“Then we’ll fix it,” he said. “How do we fix it?”
“I have to tell you everything.”
“All right then, tell me.”
I’m The Savior. She burst into tears.
“Leila!”
“Everything will change, and you’ll never forgive me,” She cried.
“Why would you say that?”
“I haven’t been forthcoming with you…”
“About what?” His face dropped. “Oh my God, are you betrothed?”
“No, it’s bigger than that.”
“Bigger? Are you married?”
“Tobias, no.”
“Is there someone else?” he said. “Please tell me there’s no one else. I’d die.”
“There’s no one else. There’s only you.”
“Then tell me what it is.” He waited, his gaze probing. “Does it have to do with Brontes?”
She nodded. Her power had shriveled away, and She buried Her face into Her pillow.
“Leila darling, don’t turn away from me.” Tobias scooped Her up into his embrace. “You don’t have to say anything right now.”
“But I need to. Before anything else happens between us, I need to. It wouldn’t be right.”
“Then nothing has to happen. I’ll wait for as long as you need.”
She met his gaze. “You’re not leaving?”
Tobias shook his head. “I want to know everything, but I won’t force you. You’ll tell me when you’re good and ready. And until then, I’ll be right here.”
His fingers slid through Her hair, a soft caress that stilled Her heartbeat. This beautiful man—everything She wanted, everything She was at risk to lose. She rested Her head against his chest, immersing Herself in his refracting light.
I’m The Savior.
This time, She would get it right.
32
The Package
Soft lips brushed Her shoulder. Again, at Her nape. Each kiss climbed higher, coaxing Her awake.
The song of birds rang from Her garden. It was morning time, though Her chamber was cloaked in shadows, the curtains shut tight. An arm looped around Her waist, and the lips continued their march up Her neck.
Tobias. Her love.
“I was sleeping, you know,” She said.
“Oh good, you’re awake.”
She rolled onto Her back, and there he was, beaming. Disheveled curls spilled down his brow, his jaw dotted with fresh stubble. His eyes drifted from Hers, slinking lower as pink wisped from his skin.
Leila laughed. “You’re staring at my breasts.”
His gaze flitted back to Hers. “Lies, you’re staring at mine. Don’t you dare treat me like a piece of meat. I will not stand for it.”
Chuckling, She shoved him down into the sheets, resting Her head in its spot on his chest. His heart beat against Her ear.
Mine.
“You smell like peaches,” he said.
“You smell like wine.”
“Well, that makes sense. I’ve been drowning in the stuff since I lost you.”
She gave him a squeeze. “It’s a good thing you’ve found me again, then.”
The happiest sunset lifted from his flesh—streams of orange, yellow, and pink. Her fingers danced across his stomach, creating colorful loops. “What are you thinking?”
“I’m thinking this, right here, is the single greatest moment of my life,” he said. “And I never want to leave your bed.”
“Is that because my breasts are pressed up against you?”
“No, but I do like that a lot.”
“Cosima’s are bigger.”
“Don’t compare yourself to Her.” He recoiled. “God, I don’t even want to think about Her.”
“Did She really say those things? About Brontes and the other woman?”
“She did. Among other things.” He stared at the wall, his jaw set. “When I told Her not to touch me, She mocked me in response, like I was miles beneath Her.”
“You’re not beneath Her. You’re a good man.”
His face dropped. “I’m sorry I kissed Her.”
“Don’t,” She said. “You were protecting me. You should’ve never been put in that situation to begin with.” Guilt stirred within Her, and She picked at Her fingernails. “I’m so sorry for what She did to you. She’s become someone I don’t recognize. My sister… Gone.”
Tobias pulled Her closer, tearing Her from Her ugly thoughts. “I’ll never hurt you again. I’ll be good to you for the rest of my life, however short it may be.”
“Short?”
“I left Cosima’s bed for yours. I’m fairly certain that’s not a forgivable offense.” He sighed. “It doesn’t matter. I mean it does, but…I tried doing what I was supposed to do. It turned my stomach.” He looked Her in the eyes. “This is the only decision I can live with. Whatever happens because of it, it doesn’t matter. This is what’s right for me.”
“You’re not going to die,” Leila said. “I won’t let that happen.”
“That’s very kind of you, darling, but between my transgressions and the Culmination today, I find that hard to believe.”
“Your transgressions will be ignored. And you’re not going to compete. Kaleo and Flynn will fight alone, and you’ll remain safe and sound.”
“How
do you know this?”
Leila went rigid. No more dodging. No more lies. The time was now.
“Does this have something to do with what you need to tell me?” he said.
I don’t want The Savior. His words were an echo in the back of Her mind, but She pushed past the noise. “I believe you and I have some matters to discuss.”
Tobias leapt into action, wrangling pillows and propping himself upright, a child ready for story time. Leila situated Herself between his legs, and a stiff bulge dug into Her stomach.
Hello, you.
Tobias furrowed his brow. “What?”
“You’re hard.”
“You’re beautiful. And naked.”
Warmth flooded Her face, and She couldn’t fight Her laughter.
“What now?”
“I’d never seen one before,” She said. “A cock.”
“Really? Is that right? You’ve killed a man, but you’ve never seen a cock. I swear, you baffle me. Well, I hope I didn’t disappoint—aesthetically speaking, that is, since we’ve yet to put it to work.”
She giggled relentlessly, hiding Her face in Her hands.
“I suppose I have a confession of my own.” Tobias looked away. “I’ve never… I mean I’ve done things…but I’ve never—”
“Fucked?”
“You’re so blunt,” he said.
“But you’re so handsome.”
“And you’re beautiful. What’s your excuse?”
She gestured around the room. “I’ve been here, locked away in the fortress.”
“Well then, I suppose that’s my excuse as well.” A cheeky grin spread across his lips. “You’ve been here, locked away in the fortress.”
Pride beamed through Her, making Her sit taller. “Well, this is all wonderful news. We can be terrible at it together. I’ll feel much more comfortable knowing you’re just as clueless as me.”
The bulge against Her stomach pulsed. Was that a thing cocks did? Shifting Her weight, She lifted the sheet, admiring the polished bronze in Tobias’s lap.
Majestic.
“Leila!”
She dropped the sheet. “What? I only got the briefest look last night.”
“You degenerate.” He laughed.
“It’s fascinating. How do you even walk with all that flopping around? Seems rather cumbersome.”