The Wishing Well

by Anna Jacobs

  * * * *

  When she put the phone down, Caitlin clapped both hands across her mouth and groaned aloud. Why had she done that? She’d decided after Ryan’s last visit that they had to stop seeing one another and had promised herself to issue no more invitations to him.

  But today she’d seen the fish in a shop just down the road, looking so fresh and tempting, and before she could prevent herself, she’d bought enough for two and rung him at work. She loved cooking but it was no fun cooking for yourself.

  Craig had enjoyed her cooking too, said she was the only woman he’d met who was as good as his wife.

  Ryan wasn’t at all like his father. Both men were warm and generous, but Ryan had a much quieter personality. She loved his sense of humour - Craig hadn’t had much sense of humour - and she and Ryan shared a lot of interests. Best of all she felt utterly safe with him.

  Not that she hadn’t felt physically safe with Craig - she had. The minute he’d found out she was expecting his child, he’d taken charge, wrapping her in luxury at a time when she’d been very tearful and unlike her usual sensible self. He’d been really good to her in the only way he knew how, materially, and had been delighted at the thought of having another child. That had surprised her.

  But with Ryan, she felt emotionally safe, which was much more important, she now knew.

  Tears brimmed in her eyes. She tried to keep up her spirits, but she didn’t know anyone in Melbourne except Ryan and didn’t dare join anything in case one of her family found out where she was. She wouldn’t put anything past Barry, had no doubt that it was he who’d found out where she was in Perth.

  Her family would never let her go if they could help it. Her father truly believed women should be under the control of their menfolk. Her mother - well, she’d never stood up to her husband in her whole life. Once the baby was born Caitlin would have to find a more secure place to hide.

  Only where? She’d have to register to vote and she’d bet that as soon as she was on the electoral rolls, Barry would find her again.

  Would that mean she had to leave Ryan behind, as she’d left her friends in Perth? She hated the thought of that, absolutely hated it.

  What did he really think of her? Was she just his father’s mistress or did he like her for herself?

  Was anything possible between them? Did she dare hope?

  * * * *

  The following morning Angie rang Laura up just as she was going out to take Kit to his physio appointment.

  “Can’t stop, love. Can I call you back later?” She heard what sounded suspiciously like a sob. “Angie? What’s wrong?”

  “They took Mum into hospital last night.”

  “What?”

  “She’s got OCD - obsessive compulsive disorder - has had it for a while and. I need to talk to you about it because I need your help in telling Pop. He’s got the carer coming in this afternoon. Weren’t you going to take him to have coffee with Mum? Can we go together and tell him then?”

  “All right. I’ll pick you up in about half an hour.” She went to find Kit.

  “I’m ready, ma’am,” he began then saw her expression. “What’s wrong?”

  “My sister’s in hospital. She’s got OCD, apparently. That’s – ”

  “I know what it is. How badly?”

  “I don’t know. But Angie needs my help to tell my father. Will it be all right if I go out earlier than planned this afternoon? She was crying.”

  “Of course it will.” He glanced quickly at his watch. “It’s too late for me to get a taxi but I can catch one back. Just drop me at the physio’s, then go and see what Angie needs.”

  “You’re sure?”

  “Of course I am.”

  “Thank you.”

  * * * *

  Laura drove up to the neat little bungalow, where everything looked so normal from the outside that it was hard to believe there was a major family crisis going on. Sue’s little red car was parked neatly on the drive, the plants were still standing to attention in their stiffly regimented rows and the terylene nets were as crisply white as ever, veiling the family from the world.

  Angie opened the door before Laura even got there and flung herself into her aunt’s arms, weeping.

  Putting one arm round her shoulders, Laura drew her back inside the house then simply cuddled her close. “Shh, now. Shh. It’s all right. Just tell me what’s happened so that we can work out what to do.”

  When Angie had finished her tale, Laura was so shocked she couldn’t at first speak. “Why did no one tell me before?”

  “Dad’s been trying to keep the whole thing a secret for Mum’s sake. They’re used to her at work. As long as they let her follow her little routines, she does a great job for them. It’s an advantage for a stores clerk to want everything just so, you see. And because she doesn’t eat there, she doesn’t get as paranoid. It’s food that seems to set her off - and untidiness. I try to be tidier, but I seem to irritate her all the time. I not only have to put things away, but put them away just so. If I change anything she goes ballistic.”

  She sighed. “Mum’s been getting worse and worse, and she wouldn’t admit anything was wrong, even though she’d been treated for this once already. She stopped seeing the doctor before the treatment was complete. They have to stabilise her medication rather carefully, you see.”

  “Where’s your father now?”

  “At the hospital with her. He didn’t want me to tell you, but I can’t keep it secret any more, Auntie Laura, I just can’t. I need someone to talk to. Anyway, Pop was going to see her.”

  “You’re coming back with me, then. You’ve not staying here on your own. You’ll only brood.”

  “Dad asked me to clear up and I’ve done the kitchen, sort of. But I’m supposed to be seeing Deb today as well.”

  “Oh, hell! I’d forgotten about that.”

  “Maybe she can help us tell Pop?”

  “Deb?” Laura bit off an adverse comment. She couldn’t imagine Deb helping anyone but herself. “I don’t think so. She’ll - er - still be jetlagged.”

  “Then what are we going to do?”

  “We’ll pick her up and tell her your mother’s ill, then drop her in town. She can go shopping - she loves shopping - then catch a taxi back to Dad’s. In the meantime we’ll get Dad on his own and tell him.”

  Deb was watching for them. She hurried out of the house the minute they pulled up, then saw Angie’s tearstained face. “What’s wrong?”

  “We’ll go somewhere quiet and tell you.” Laura drove to the park and stopped there to explain what had happened.

  Deb stared from one to the other, then spread her hands helplessly. “I don’t know what to say.”

  “I’m sorry to let you down,” Angie said. “I’m just not feeling sociable at the moment.”

  “That doesn’t matter. What can I do to help?”

  Laura hoped her surprise at this hadn’t shown. She was pleased to see Deb reacting more normally with other people. Perhaps it was just her that Deb didn’t like, hard as that was to face. “Angie and I need to get Dad on his own, so we thought we’d all grab a quick lunch then I’ll drop you in town. You can go shopping then catch a taxi back about five o’clock. Will that be all right?”

  “Sure.”

  “We could go home and grab a sandwich there,” Angie said. “I’m not in a fit state to be seen in public. I don’t know how I’m going to go to work tonight with eyes so swollen, only I don’t like to let them down at the pub.”

  Deb looked at her critically. “I’m pretty good at make-up. I can show you how to hide the worst and if you just tell them your mother is ill, they’ll be kind to you. People were really kind to me at work when Dad died.”

  “Thanks, Deb.” Laura smiled at her and for once her daughter smiled back.

  They all worked together to get the kitchen straight, then grabbed corned beef sandwiches and a banana each.

  “I’m not sure we’ve got everything back in
what she considers the right places,” Angie worried.

  “Then you can help her rearrange it once she gets out.”

  Angie shook her head. “No way. I always make matters worse. She seems to have taken against me lately, keeps telling me things are my fault for dropping out of university and being so untidy.”

  “No more tears!” Deb said quickly, putting an arm round her cousin’s shoulders. “You have to work, remember.”

  Laura watched in chagrin. Why was her daughter never like this with her? Deb was being lovely with poor Angie.

  * * * *

  When they went to collect her father after lunch, he came out of the house beaming with pleasure at seeing them. The smile faded as soon as he saw Angie’s reddened eyes.

  “What’s wrong, love?”

  Laura intervened before Angie started crying again. “Get in and we’ll go somewhere quiet and tell you, Dad.”

  He sat in the back of the car listening to the story of his daughter’s strange and obsessive behaviour, his face racked with sadness.

  “Eh, I can’t rightly take it in,” he said when they’d finished. He pulled out a spray and squirted it under his tongue.

  “What’s that for, Dad?”

  He shrugged. “Just a touch of angina. It helps a bit.”

  Laura didn’t dare state the obvious: that if he had a heart problem, he shouldn’t be working so hard. She looked at her watch. “We’d better see to your shopping and then I have to get back. I’ve neglected my duties shamefully.”

  “I never thought!” Angie exclaimed in dismay. “And you’ve only just started working for Mr Mallinder, too.”

  “It’s all right. Kit’s very understanding.”

  It was a subdued group who went round the supermarket. As well as Kit’s supplies, Laura bought the makings of a beef casserole and promised to take it round to her father’s the next day in time for tea.

  “Thanks, love.” He gave her a hug and looked from one to the other. “It’s grand to see our family sticking together when there’s a problem. I’m proud of you all.”

  * * * *

  Kit was in the kitchen drinking one of his endless cups of coffee when Laura got back.

  “Sorry I’m so late.”

  He cocked one eye at her. “You look upset. Want to tell me about it?”

  She hesitated, wondering if it might be bad tactics to confide in her employer, then got angry with herself. Craig had always thought like that and tried to teach her to speak only about impersonal things at company functions, but it was alien to her nature and she’d often irritated him by her frankness. Besides, Kit wasn’t like other people. He was very much his own person. She sat down and explained briefly.

  “Poor you. It’s been one thing after another lately, hasn’t it?”

  “It’s other people who’re having the real problems this time. I’m just - involved. And you haven’t had the best few months of your life, either. Thanks for listening, though. It was good to get things off my chest. Now, what shall we have for tea tonight?”

  “Take-away.”

  She stared at him in surprise. “I shall feel I’ve let you down if I do that.”

  “Don’t talk daft! You’re a human being like any other and I bet you’re feeling wrung out.”

  “Well, I am a bit tired.”

  “So we’ll have take-away. There’s an Indian place in the village I’d like to try. I got the taxi driver to stop and pick me up a menu.” He flourished it at her. “Ta-da!”

  “You’re a lovely person, Kit Mallinder,” she said before she could stop herself.

  He roared with laughter. “You give me a compliment then look at me apprehensively.”

  “Well, you’re my employer and I shouldn’t be so personal and . . . ”

  “Do you think I’m going to complain about being complimented?” He leaned forward and placed his hand on hers. “Laura, I told you I’m not into formality. Say what you think, for heaven’s sake. I think of you more as a friend than an employee and I really value honesty in a friend. Get angry at me if I do something that upsets you. And if your family has a crisis, like today, go and help them. Ah, hell, what have I said now?”

  She sniffed and gulped, but the tears wouldn’t stay back. “You’ve been kind, so very kind. I’m not used to it - lately.”

  He stood up, hands resting on the table. “Come here, Laura Wells. You definitely need a hug.”

  She moved towards him as if it were a dream, walking straight into his open arms. As she rested her head against the side of his with a sigh, she could feel the strength of his wiry body against hers, but more important was the warmth of his innate kindness wrapping her round like an invisible blanket.

  He hugged her close then said huskily, “Look at me, Laura.”

  When she raised her eyes to his, he bent forward to kiss her. They were almost the same height, fitted together perfectly. His lips were warm, soft, tender, teasing. She didn’t want him to stop.

  He didn’t. He kissed her so thoroughly that she melted like chocolate against him, cuddling up against him when his lips left hers. She’d forgotten what it was like to be held in a man’s arms and kissed tenderly. Wanted more.

  “Look, Laura,” he said in her ear, “I know this isn’t sensible, given our situation, but if we don’t choose to be sensible, who are we hurting? We’re both adults, no emotional ties.”

  “I feel I’m using you, leaning on you, when I should be helping you.”

  “We’re using one another. Isn’t that what friends do? And to tell you the truth, you’re the first woman I’ve fancied since the accident. I was worried sick about my - um - masculinity. I’m not any more.”

  She could feel the proof of that and it made her feel good to know that such an attractive man fancied her. She leaned her head back just a little to study his face, loving that wry smile he had, the way he said exactly what he thought. “Well, then.”

  “What does that mean?”

  “I don’t know. Perhaps it means we should see how things go between us, not rush things, though definitely not insist on being sensible.”

  His gaze was briefly bitter as he looked down at his leg. “I can’t rush anything at the moment, can’t even hold you properly.”

  “I don’t care about that. Appearances are nothing. What I care about is what you’re like inside. And actually - ” she paused and grinned at him, “ - I fancy you too.”

  He let out a shout of laughter, planting a quick kiss on the tip of her nose before reaching for the chair back to steady himself. “Then we’ll stop denying the attraction we’re both feeling?”

  She nodded.

  “Thank goodness for that. Now, pass me those damned crutches.”

  She did as he asked, making sure he was properly balanced before she stepped away.

  “It’s very unromantic, but I have to confess I’m ravenous. Let’s order that take-away.”

  “I’m a bit hungry myself.” She hadn’t been. Was now. Nerved herself to say, “I’ll go and pick it up,” though going out alone after dark still made her nervous.

  “I’ll come with you.”

  “No need.”

  He waggled one finger at her. “Yes, there is and you know it. I may not be able to drive you there, or hobble in and out of the restaurant with you, but my presence in the car will make you feel safer.”

  She stopped pretending. “Thanks. I was mugged once and it’s left me a bit nervous at night.”

  “They tell me I was mugged and thrown in front of a truck in Bangkok. They say it’s common to have memory lapses after such a bad accident. I didn’t remember a thing.”

  “Kit, how terrible!”

  “Annoys the hell out of me not to know why, but that’s all water under the bridge now. Come on, woman! Stop talking and let’s decide what we want to eat. And we’ll open that bottle of champagne when we get back. I want to celebrate.” He gave her one of his quirky smiles. “Don’t you think we’ve got something to celebrate? G
ood friends are such treasures.”

  Joy bubbled up in her. “Yes, I do.”

  * * * *

  But in the middle of the night Kit woke up, as he sometimes did, and lay there, letting his thoughts drift idly. And suddenly another memory came back. It was Shaun Nolan who’d offered him the assignment. Shaun had come to visit him once in hospital early on, but had said nothing about what he’d been doing in Bangkok.

  Try as he might, Kit could remember no more details, either about the assignment or about the mugging. Well, the doctors had told him any memory lost might be patchy and not to push it if bits came back to him, just let things happen.

  He really must get down to unpacking his boxes. There might be something in there to give him a clue. It still galled him to have even a small slice removed from his life.

  Chapter 18

  Two days later Deb was nearly back to normal again after the jetlag. She’d woken in the middle of each night, lying in the darkness unable to recognise where she was, then realising she was at Pop’s and snuggling down again.

  It felt strange to be living here, but he was so easy to be with that it’d gone better than she’d expected. Gran seemed to be in a world of her own most of the time, though on a couple of occasions, Deb had seen her look across the room and smile in the old way, once at Pop, once at her. But each time the smile had soon faded. She listened to Pop shower and dress his wife each morning, watching him coaxing her to eat, because Gran didn’t seem interested in food any more.

  It nearly broke her heart because it was all too obvious that she’d come too late to spend time with the real Gran. She’d cried a couple of times about that, but hadn’t let on to Pop, who had enough troubles to bear.

  “She’s slipping away from us so fast,” Pop said once in a low voice. “Last month she still talked to me, now she doesn’t say much at all. I should have told our Laura about her sooner.”

  “You weren’t to know.” After a few minutes, he took Gran out into the yard, where she immediately began walking round. He glanced out of the window and began to clear up the kitchen. When Deb went to help him, he gave her one of his gentle smiles. No one smiled like her Pop.