by Lisa Jackson
Celia nodded. She’d even gotten the twins into the act a couple of times. She’d never forget her father’s grilling Jacob about a pack that he’d just bought—Celia had shoved them in Jacob’s back pocket. Poor Jacob! Her father could be intimidating when he wanted to be. But Jacob had stood his ground, insisting they were his cigarettes. To both their horror, Pete called his bluff.
“Then smoke one,” he said. “Right now.”
Jacob looked like a deer in headlights. “I’m saving them,” he said. “For after dinner.”
“They’re not a piece of pie, son,” Pete said. “Have one now.”
“Celia hates it when I smoke,” Jacob said.
“Well then, you might as well hand that pack over to me. Wouldn’t want to upset your girl, would you?”
Celia shut off the memory and looked at Jacob, who was patiently watching her. “I was thinking about that cigarette he tried to make you smoke,” Celia said.
“I would have done it,” Jacob said. “For you.”
Celia knew that was true. She was the one who had grabbed the pack out of Jacob’s pocket and handed them to her dad. Celia was pretty sure he had known all along, but he still couldn’t pass up an opportunity to give Jacob a bit of a hard time. In her dad’s eyes, no boy was good enough for his daughter. “I told Anna Beth he was eaten by a shark while diving in the Fiji Islands.”
“You what?” Jacob looked startled for a moment, then threw his head back and roared with laughter.
“He’s in the coffee can downstairs,” she heard herself say.
“What?”
Jacob sounded so startled. His eyes were huge. Then, he started to laugh again. “Chock full o’Nuts.”
Celia began to laugh along with him. She could almost hear her father’s voice mixed in with theirs. “It was totally his idea.”
“Oh, I’m sure.”
She felt so close to Jacob. He understood her. He understood her father. Unlike Ben. Then, talking about her dad, while standing in Elizabeth’s old house, brought back a rush of anger. Why was Jacob helping Elizabeth move? Why was he mentioning Emily? “Are you friends with them?”
“Who?”
“Elizabeth Tanner and Emily.”
Jacob looked at her before speaking. He had this way of gazing at her that made her feel as if he were more in tune with her than anyone else in her entire life. Did he feel it too? It wasn’t a guarantee. After all, Ben had told her he was crazy about her, and she’d never felt that way about him. Not even close. “You sound upset.”
“You don’t remember what they did to my dad?”
“Of course I remember. But you’ve been gone a long time, Seal. People change. They mellow.”
“You’re telling me that Elizabeth Tanner has mellowed?”
“That might be stretching it a little. But I don’t take her as seriously as I used to. That’s for sure.”
“She ruined my father’s reputation. She had the whole town thinking he was a thief.”
“Not the whole town. You know Chris and I never thought he stole the ring.”
“He didn’t.”
“We even showed up to one of Mrs. Tanner’s Neighborhood Watch meetings. We told them we trusted Pete. We tried to calm them down.”
“I take it you’ve never found the ring.”
Jacob broke her gaze, stared down at his shoes. “Honestly, Celia. I try not to even think about it anymore.”
“You’re right. The damage is done. Elizabeth and Emily saw to that.”
Jacob looked at her again. His voice was soft, but reprimanding. “Come on, now. Emily was just a kid. Like us.”
He was right. And the last thing she wanted to do was sound bitter. “How’s Chris?” She had to change the subject before she went over the deep end.
“Oh, busy. He’s married. Finally has three little squirts.”
“I know.” It was out of her mouth before she could stop.
“You know?”
Yes. I’ve been cyber stalking you. You’re delicious dessert, and I came back to have another bite. “I, uh—Anna Beth.” Truthfully, the realtor hadn’t said a thing about anyone, but at her commission, Celia didn’t feel too guilty about throwing her under the bus.
“Ah,” Jacob said.
“Did he marry Emily?”
“What? No. No, he didn’t marry Emily.”
“Oh. Just as well.”
“What do you mean?”
“He’d be stuck in that family. I can’t imagine anything worse.”
“I see.” Jacob sounded upset again.
She was jumping into the past too fast. She should talk about good times before she got around to the bad. “Would you like to grab a drink?” What was she doing? Acting like they were old friends. Instead of lovers. She didn’t even know if they had been lovers. Her face grew hot at the memory.
Sometimes, we switch places. Chris. Standing in the sun, a suggestive leer on his face.
“Now? You remember where you are, don’t you?”
“What?”
“All the bars are closed.”
“Oh. Right. I forget I’m not in Boston.”
“Is that where you live?”
“Lived.”
“Right.” They stared at each other again. “I always wondered,” Jacob said.
“Me too. About you.” Jacob nodded, then turned away. He was the one who had some explaining to do. Did he know what Chris had done? Why didn’t Jacob come back to the boardwalk? Had Chris lied to him about something? She couldn’t ask without warming up to it. The only alcohol she had in the house was a bottle of scotch she had bought for her dad. She figured she’d toast with it after she released his ashes into the ocean. She could always buy another bottle. “What about a drink here? I have some really good scotch.”
Jacob really looked uncomfortable now. There was something he wasn’t saying. “I’d love to, but I have to get home. The girlfriend’s waiting.” And he said it.
It felt like a slap to the face. Of course. A home. A girlfriend. Waiting. His life hadn’t stayed frozen in time.
“Of course.” She headed back down the stairs, taking them as quickly as possible. “Thanks for coming—” She stopped in the hall, turned. “Why did you come?”
“What?”
“What were you doing here tonight?”
“Oh. Right.” He dug in his pocket, pulled out a key. “I was retrieving this from the porch.” He handed it to Celia.
“Extra key?”
“Emily said it was under the mat. She didn’t want anyone finding it and breaking in on the new owner.”
“Ah. Thanks.” Soon they were standing at the front door like strangers at the end of a first date. Only this time it wasn’t going to end in a kiss.
“Of course, she didn’t know you were the new owner or that you would be here at midnight or she’d probably have come herself,” Jacob said.
“Right. So instead she sent you.” Jacob looked away. “Because you’re her boyfriend.” One look, and Celia knew she was right. And just like that, she didn’t feel like a thirty-eight-year-old woman; rather she was instantly a seventeen-year-old girl. Emily Tanner and Jacob Vernon. Jacob Vernon and Emily Tanner. She was going to cry. She was actually going to cry in front of Jacob, and for once her father wasn’t here to buy her ice cream. And she didn’t have any furniture. She had thought it would be an “adventure” to furnish as she went. Only she couldn’t afford to buy anything. So now it was just an empty house with no soft bed. She bet Jacob had a bed. And he shared it with Emily. She had to turn her back on him because the embarrassing tears were really coming now.
“Whoa,” Jacob said. “Hey.” Oh God, she was acting so immature. She didn’t want him to see her this way. “Seal.”
Celia melted at the sound of her old nickname. Jacob took her in his arms. She could feel his heart beating against hers. They stood in the embrace for a few seconds until time seemed to come to a halt and the air was thick with sexual tension. Celia p
ulled away, and Jacob took a step back, as if he had been caught doing something he shouldn’t have.
Why? Why did she leave him here to be swooped up by Emily? As a girl, Emily had always loved Chris. Celia wondered what Chris thought of his brother dating his old girlfriend. They’d probably all put the past behind them. It was easier to do if you weren’t humiliated and made out to be a criminal, and tormented by the thought that you might have been tricked into sleeping with the wrong guy. She should just come out and ask Jacob. Why did you leave me all alone on the beach? Did you know Chris came instead? Tried to make me believe I slept with him?
“You’d better go. I’m sure she wouldn’t want to be kept waiting.”
Jacob looked at her for a long time. Celia stared back, willing herself not to cry more or even blink.
“Please go.” Please don’t. Did we make love, Jacob? Or did Chris trick me? I know it was you. How could I not know? I just can’t help it. Chris planted a seed of doubt in my head and it took over all my thoughts, strangling out all reality, choking me like a weed.
Jacob stood watching her for another moment, then nodded, turned, and walked out the door. It was only then that Celia slid to the floor. Here she was in this empty house. No Dad. No Jacob. She was barefoot in Elizabeth Tanner’s house. Owned Elizabeth’s house. Jacob was here. And he was with Emily. No matter how much time had gone by, or how hard she tried, the Tanner women were always one step ahead. I don’t give second chances, she heard Ben say. And most of the time, neither does life.
CHAPTER 5
In the week following her run-in with Jacob, Celia threw herself into small home-improvement projects that wouldn’t break the bank. She painted the downstairs walls. Red in the dining room. Yellow in the kitchen, and a more vibrant blue in the living room. What an instant and wonderful difference. She purchased a chandelier in town, an ornate one with hundreds of shimmering crystals. She hired a handyman the realtor recommended, and he hung an antique mirror that she’d bought on eBay above the fireplace. Jacob could have done the work, of course, but she certainly wasn’t going to call him. She’d yet to buy furniture, only a blow-up mattress for her attic room. She was no longer feeling as vulnerable as she had that first night, and she still wanted to take her time, consider each piece of furniture carefully. Besides, there was something soothing about an empty house. It felt roomy, and each room still held the anticipation of what it could become.
The one exception was the wicker rocking chair she bought for the front porch. Rocking while listening to the ocean was incredibly soothing. As an investment banker, she had never napped, had to constantly drink Red Bull to keep on her toes. Here she found herself falling asleep in the rocking chair during the afternoons, little catnaps on her porch.
She spent loads of time looking at furniture in catalogs or online. But buying the house had really wiped her out. To make matters even more challenging, she had officially quit her job via a postcard. Don’t wish you were here—I quit. She felt both giddy and embarrassed by it, but her father would have loved it. Unfortunately, she only had a few more paychecks coming to her, so things were going to get really tight really quick. She would have to convince Ben to sell their condo and split the profit. Not an easy feat since he was treating the condo like a pawn in their breakup. It was a really good thing they had never had kids. So far he was pretending she was temporarily out of her mind with grief and was going to come to her senses and return. Celia was tired of being the bad guy, so she was going to let him stew for a while, and then she’d be forced to call an attorney. Legally, he had to either buy her out or sell. She was just praying she wouldn’t have to resort to threats.
“Toodle-oo!” a female voice cried out. Celia was knee-deep in grime. Hair pinned on top of her head with a pencil. Kneeling on the living room floor. Scrubbing. She heard the call, then heard the front screen door opening and slamming. Heels clacked across the wood floor, and it wasn’t until Emily Tanner came into view that Celia warned her not to step onto the wet floor. “Oh,” Emily said. “Just look at Cinderella.”
“Does that make you the evil stepsister?” Celia asked.
Emily, hands on hips, looked like a replica of her mother from twenty years ago. The mousey child had transformed into a blond bombshell. Tan and model thin except for a decent-sized chest, nails manicured and painted, hair straightened, eyelashes carefully applied along with the rest of her makeup. She stood in the doorway holding a basket.
Celia stood, awkwardly shoved a stray bang out of her eyes, and put on her best smile. She was going to have to be the bigger person and play nice. “Emily. It’s great to see you.”
“Is it?” Emily held her smile. She had always been such an insecure little girl. Celia used to feel sorry for her. She had even known Emily was just using her to be close to the twins, but Celia hadn’t minded. She knew the twins had no interest in plain little Emily. Now, here she was with the looks, but unfortunately, the sweet little girl was gone. The pendulum had swung in the opposite direction.
“Of course. I would shake your hand, but—”
“Not necessary. I brought muffins. To congratulate you. On buying my mother’s house.”
“How nice of you.” As Emily approached her with the basket, Celia found herself involuntarily stepping back, and after an awkward few moments, it dawned on Celia that they were actually circling each other. Celia made a point to stop.
Emily looked her over very slowly. It was remarkable; she used to be so timid. Apparently, that was a quality you could grow out of. “When Jacob told me you were the mysterious buyer, well, you could have knocked me over with a feather.”
“I’m sure.” It certainly didn’t look hard to do. Emily should be the one eating muffins.
“I hope muffins are okay. I’m sure you’re watching your weight.”
Celia peeled off the rubber gloves, wiped her hands on the sides of her cargo pants, and marched up to the basket. She grabbed a muffin. “Not at all. I really enjoy food. My boyfriend loves my Marilyn Monroe curves.” Celia bit into the muffin. It tasted like cardboard sprinkled with a few moldy cranberries. She chewed for a bit and then put the rest of the muffin back in the basket.
“Something wrong?” Emily asked. From the glint in her eye, Emily knew exactly how horrible the muffins tasted.
“Sometimes a bite is all you need.” I’d like to bite you.
Emily headed for the kitchen without even asking. Celia trailed behind, like she was the uninvited guest.
“Is he here?” Emily said.
For a split second Celia thought she meant Jacob. Maybe he’d stopped going home. “Who?”
“Your boyfriend.”
“No,” Celia said. She wasn’t getting into it with Emily.
Emily set the basket on the counter and inspected the kitchen. Celia got the feeling it didn’t pass muster. She half-expected Emily to pull a white glove out of her purse and give it a go. “Mother is thrilled you took this albatross off her hands,” Emily said.
“Really? I thought she was forced to sell. Hard times and all.”
“Oh, no. Not at all. This place is falling apart. All that salt air. The upkeep is a nightmare. She’d rather travel and live in a newer condominium. She and her husband already have another vacation home in Georgia. It’s a Southern dream. This place is a dump compared to it.”
“Jacob said she was remarried.” At the mention of Jacob, Emily furled her arched eyebrows, but didn’t quite swallow the bait.
“Oh, yes. He’s rich and handsome.”
Celia didn’t comment. She’d deal with Elizabeth in her own good time.
“Jacob I Have Loved,” Emily said out of the blue.
“Jacob Have I Loved,” Celia corrected.
“You still do, don’t you?” Emily said.
Way to cut right to the chase! Celia could feel herself heating up. Emily was the one person Celia had confided in that horrible next morning. I know I slept with Jacob, but he left to get something. A surprise
. But he didn’t come back. Chris did. He acted like he was the one I had slept with. What do I do, Emily? What do I do?
Oh God. They’re horrible! Both of them. They ruined you.
What do you mean, ruined me? I love Jacob. We’re both eighteen—
But you say it was Chris—
No. Chris said it was Chris. You know how he is—
I don’t know how he is. Because it’s you he wants! It’s always you, you, you!
And somehow, Emily had turned Celia’s cry for help into her own personal drama. That’s when Celia had really understood the price of being used. Celia brought herself back to the present. She was an adult now. She would act like one.
“How is Chris?” Celia said. “Do you still follow him everywhere he goes?” Celia knew the minute it was out of her mouth, it was too obvious, too heavy-handed for the light slapping they’d done so far, but it was too late to take it back. But Emily didn’t blink.
“You haven’t seen him?” Emily said. There it was again, the same glint in her eye that had accompanied the muffins.
“ No.”
“He hangs out at the arcade most of the time. You should definitely go say hi.”
“He’s the last person I want to see. You should know that.”
“I didn’t realize you were still holding a grudge. Boys will be boys.”
Don’t ask her. Don’t ask her. Do NOT ask her. “Did you ever ask Jacob about it?”
Emily smiled. Celia knew instantly that this was the moment Emily had been waiting for. A chess match. “Of course. I was dying to know.” Check.
She’s pure hate, Celia realized. Like mother, like daughter. Celia wasn’t going to play. It was Jacob she needed to discuss this with, no one else.
“It was Chris,” Emily announced. And mate. Except she was lying. She had to be.
“No,” Celia said. “It was Jacob. I know it was Jacob.”
“Oh. You didn’t know it then, but you suddenly know now?”
Mean girl, mean girl, mean girl. Weren’t women supposed to outgrow this behavior? “Why are you treating me this way?”
“Pardon?”
“Let’s cut the crap. I don’t deserve this. You used to be my friend.” Or at least pretended to be.