by JD Nixon
Trent’s glance was sharp. “Wait a minute, Tilly. You live with Heller? You live with your boss? That’s one weird relationship you have going on with him.”
“I don’t live with him exactly. I have my own flat. We just live in the same building. It’s his business and residence combined. He lets me stay there for free. And it’s not just us living there. There are four other people who live there too.” I remembered the mysterious Victor. “Five other people.”
“Oh. But there’s still the issue of him not wanting you to work for him. I clearly heard him say that.”
“Yeah, that’s pretty hurtful. He said he was angry and didn’t mean it, but it’s made me do some serious thinking. I’m sick of being injured all the time. You wouldn’t believe what’s happened to me since I started working for him. Frankly, sometimes I think that I’m lucky I’m still alive.”
“Well, if you’re looking for a chance to try out a new career, I was genuine about my job offer. My researcher is having a baby and going on parental leave for a year in a week’s time and I still haven’t found a replacement for her. You’d be perfect, Tilly. Think about it.”
“Thanks, Trent. I will,” I smiled. “What would you like me to do for you today?”
He recited off a list of chores for me, including sifting through more paperwork on the lookout for potential stories. I sorted them into three piles: the definites, the maybe if we’re desperates, and the incredibly disturbings. Trent came over and flicked through the definites, and nodded in approval at my choices, leaving me beaming like a teacher’s pet. It had been a while since anyone had praised me for my work effort.
The next few days passed by without incident. Trent decided not to go back to work for the rest of the week, taking advantage of the fact that the trial had ended early to reward himself with a few days off. We worked each morning, but played hooky in the afternoons to do something fun. We went to the movies one day and for a long bike ride around the harbour the next day. I was incredibly stiff and sore, bruised everywhere, but the flat bike path was manageable for me without too much pain. Later we went to the supermarket to stock up for dinner, and I waited patiently while he signed autographs for a couple of over-permed white-haired ladies, who simpered at him. He flirted outrageously with them, leaving them giggling in delight. Boldly winking at them, he sauntered away jauntily, grinning at me.
“You love the attention, don’t you?” I smiled.
“Maybe,” he conceded, shrugging with charming sheepishness. “I’d love it more if it was a group of hot and horny university students though.”
I laughed. “Dream on, Trent.”
Back in his office I reminded him that I was going home the next day as my week with him was finishing up.
“You’re positive that you’re going back to Heller?” he asked.
“Of course.”
“Even after what he said . . .”
“We care about each other. I belong there with him. It’s the only place in my life I’ve ever felt as though I belong. I wouldn’t throw that away easily.”
“You’re very loyal. I hope he appreciates it,” he said as he flipped through his diary. “Oh shit! I’d forgotten about that.”
“What?”
“There’s a big charity event on Wednesday evening. I’ve been ordered to attend by the network boss. I’d forgotten about it. I haven’t lined up a date yet. Damn! I can’t ask any of my usual lady friends. They’d be annoyed with me at the late notice, but I can’t go by myself.” He turned to regard me speculatively. “What are you doing on Wednesday, Tilly? Are you free?”
“I expect I’ll be doing nothing. I’m probably going to be unemployed.”
“Come with me to this event? Please! You can meet all the celebrities,” he wheedled.
I scrunched my nose with disinterest, but then had a brilliant idea. “Okay, I’ll go with you, but only if you return the favour by partnering me to a wedding next Saturday. I can’t find anyone to take me, because they all share a passionate hatred of the groom.”
He considered for a minute and checked his diary, crossing out an entry he’d had recorded for that Saturday.
“Oh, you’re busy that day. Never mind.”
“She can wait. I’d have more fun spending time with you anyway,” he said with a lovely smile. “And I owe you one.”
We spent our last evening together drinking wine on the balcony, chatting casually.
“Do you want me to pick you up on Wednesday?” he asked as we parted for the night.
“No. I expect Heller will want to drop me off here.”
“What? He drives you to dates?” Trent asked, taken aback.
“Yes. And often picks me up again afterwards.”
He shook his head in bafflement. “He keeps tight control over you, doesn’t he? It’s not normal, Tilly. In fact, I think it’s quite creepy.”
“He just worries about me. I told you we had a complicated relationship.”
“You’re not wrong. Goodnight, Tilly.”
Heller arrived to pick me up the next morning, an awkward moment for all of us. Unusually subdued, he still behaved as he would for any client and enquired politely of Trent whether he’d been satisfied with the service he’d received from the Heller’s staff. Trent, equally polite, indicated that he had been satisfied, tactfully not mentioning Beyrer. He went on to give me a particular recommendation.
“See you Wednesday, Trent.”
“I’m looking forward to it.”
“Me too. Bye.”
And he stayed at his front door until the lift doors closed on us.
Chapter 24
In the lift, keeping his features and voice neutral, Heller asked, “Do you have a date with him on Wednesday?”
“I’m doing him a favour. He needed a partner to a charity event. And he’s doing me one in return by accompanying me to Will’s wedding,” I replied coolly, staring straight ahead.
The atmosphere between us was strained on the journey back to the Warehouse. He remained silent, despite throwing me a couple of meaningful glances. I knew he was relying on me to break the ice, but I struggled to find the right tone and the right words. In the end, he did it simply with heartfelt sincerity.
“I’m so sorry, my sweet.”
“I know.” I reached over to grasp his hand, offering him a rueful smile.
Later that evening in the hot tub, we tentatively began discussing our ‘relationship’. We both agreed that we cared for each other, and neither of us wished to step backwards from what we shared. But equally neither of us had a clue about whether we should, or even could, progress it further.
I confessed to myself that my feelings for him were growing stronger all the time, but there wasn’t any chance of becoming seriously involved with him while he still shagged every woman he could get his hands on. He’d already admitted that I aroused emotions in him that he found unfamiliar and difficult to manage.
Once again, we were at an impasse.
“All I know is that I need you to be here with me and I don’t want a life without you any more. But when I think about how many times I’ve almost lost you since you started working for me I become . . . stressed. And then I react badly when you become entangled in another dangerous situation. That’s why I always seem to be so angry with you,” he explained.
“I don’t mean to make you angry,” I said apologetically.
“And I don’t mean to always say the wrong thing.” He held out his arms. “Come here.”
I slid across the hot tub and plonked myself on his lap, wrapping my arms around his shoulders. He reached up to kiss me and that’s all we did for the next ten minutes – deep, slow kissing. He was talented and demanding, not rushing, allowing us to fully appreciate each other’s lips and tongues. Intensely sensuous, it left us both breathless.
“Does that make up a little for the shower?” he asked, his voice husky with desire.
“Mmm,” I purred, melting against him.
He stroked my back caressingly. “I love it when you’re like this.”
“Like what?” I asked, nuzzling his neck with my lips.
“Soft and warm and loving. It stirs up all sorts of sensations in me, externally and internally.” He wasn’t lying about his external stirrings – sitting on his lap in only a bikini, it was rigid against me.
I would have been happy to stay like that all night, but of course he had to ruin it.
“I’m going to have to discipline you, Matilda.”
I giggled. “Ooh, kinky! But don’t you think we should have some vanilla sex first before we try the more adventurous stuff?”
He smiled. “Not that kind of discipline. Although now that you mention it . . . I might dig up that pair of handcuffs I own. That would stop you running away from me at least.” He stopped for a brief kiss break. “No, I meant doling out a punishment for what happened between you and Beyrer.”
I sat up indignantly. “I didn’t do anything wrong. Why would you punish me?”
“The bad publicity is hitting me hard. I’ve had five cancelled assignments and we’re not getting any new jobs in at all at the moment. I know it doesn’t seem fair to you, but I have to maintain discipline in my business and in my staff. Everyone needs to be reminded that I am the boss and I won’t tolerate any behaviour that’s going to impact on my business. And unfortunately, your behaviour on that assignment, whether commendable or not, has impacted in a negative way on my business.”
“It’s not fair! I didn’t do anything wrong,” I protested, scrambling to move off his lap. I no longer felt soft and warm and loving. But he held me in place with an iron grip.
“I need to be able to assure my clients that the staff members involved in that incident have been either dismissed or disciplined. I don’t know what else I can do to counteract the negative publicity.”
Although hugely sulky with him, something Trent had said popped into my mind. “I know something that might help. Don’t reject it immediately. Have a think about it first. Trent wants to do a story on your business. He’s interested in exploring the work we do. If I asked him nicely it could be a puff piece, which would be good for business.”
He thought about it for a while. “My first instinct is to say no, but I can see the benefits in doing a story with him. It makes good business sense, as long as it’s a positive story. I’ll think about it tonight.”
“Okay.” I studied his face, eyes full of misery. “How are you going to punish me?”
He sighed. “Don’t look at me like that, my sweet. I don’t want to punish you. I’ll have to think of something that sends a message, but isn’t too painful for you.”
“I want you to suspend me for a year.”
“What?” he exclaimed in surprise.
“That could be my punishment. Trent’s offered me a job for twelve months, replacing his researcher while she’s having a baby. I really want to do it.”
“But what about your job with me?” He sounded wounded.
“I need a break from it, Heller. I’m aching everywhere. I have bruises all over me and I’d only barely recovered from the last batch of bruises I received. I’ve been through a lot since I started working for you and I want to do something that doesn’t involve me almost dying every time I step out the door.”
“You’d work for him, but still live with us. And you’d return to working for me at the end of the year?”
“Of course I would.”
His eyes ran over my face as he contemplated my proposition. “It would send a very strong message to the men. And a message to my clients that I maintain a disciplined staff. It’s a good idea.”
I hadn’t expected him to take to the idea of suspending me that quickly. I’d presumed that he’d need time to think about it. “You don’t have to be so enthusiastic about it,” I complained.
“I’m considering the advantages. You’re safe in an office job, and I’m not worrying about you every second of the day. I don’t lose my temper over your reckless actions, so there’s peace at home. I don’t have to keep sending you away on assignments. But best of all . . .”
“Yes? What?”
“I won’t be your boss anymore, so we can finally make it happen between us.” I rolled my eyes – was that all he thought about? “Consider yourself suspended as of now, Matilda.”
My face fell. “I thought I’d be okay about it, but now I’m upset.”
“It’s a hard punishment. The men aren’t going to be happy about it. They’ll think I’m being very unfair.”
“You are.”
He shrugged. “I have to make tough decisions sometimes.”
The next day he called a staff meeting, and Sid, Clive, Daniel and I trooped into his office. Without showing any emotion, he advised them that he’d decided to discipline me for the debacle of my last assignment by suspending me from duty with his business for a year. I assumed an expression of being suitably chastened and downcast, but to be honest, there wasn’t much acting involved in it. I felt pretty miserable.
The three men stared at Heller with varying levels of shock. Sid and Daniel both spoke up immediately, objecting to the severity of the punishment. Heller thumped his fist on the table, clattering the coffee mugs, and raked us all with cold, hard eyes.
“I won’t be argued with about this matter. I have made a decision and that is final,” he snapped, his voice steely. Sid and Daniel didn’t argue any further. “Matilda, hand over your staff card to Clive.” I nodded, squirming in my seat. He was doing an exceptional job of appearing angry with me. Perhaps part of him still was. “Now we need to discuss the negative publicity we’ve had and the impact it’s having on the business. I’ve been offered a possible solution but want to discuss it with you all first.” He turned his icy eyes to me again. “You can leave now, Matilda. You no longer work for me and I won’t discuss business in front of you. In fact, I don’t want you to come into this office again until I tell you otherwise. You can clean out your desk and go.”
That hit me like a punch, and I could feel real tears pricking at my eyelids. Heller was taking all this very seriously. I guess I’d thought that life would carry on the same way, but I just wouldn’t do any more jobs for him. I’d never considered that I’d be banned from the office. I assumed that meant that I would no longer be welcome in the security section either.
Feeling quite low, I didn’t delay but left the room quickly. I went straight to my desk and collected the few personal belongings I kept there, including a timed-capture photo I’d taken of the six of us. It was my favourite photo in the world, mostly because of how good Heller looked in it, standing tall in the middle of us, his arms crossed, eyes directly staring into the lens, a superior, amused smile on his face.
Niq looked up from his schoolwork and asked me what I was doing. Oh boy, this was going to be tough, I thought, dreading the next few minutes. I sat next to him at his desk, taking one of his hands in mine.
“Niq sweetie, Heller’s suspended me for a year because I stuffed up my last job and the business received loads of bad publicity. That means I don’t work for him any more and he doesn’t want me here in the office again until my suspension is finished.”
The expression that filled Niq’s face was one I’d never seen him wear before and never wanted to see again. He was crushed, devastated, as if his entire safe and secure world had been yanked out from under him. He stood, his chair tumbling backwards to the floor.
“No. No. He can’t do that. He’s not taking you away from me,” he said, his voice breaking, the tears in his eyes matched by the tears in mine. He stalked towards Heller’s office, a determined little bundle of teenage anger and emotions, ready for a confrontation. “It’s not fair, Tilly. You didn’t do anything wrong. He can’t do that.”
I hurried to stop him, realising I hadn’t explained myself well enough. “Niq, sweetie, please! It’s going to be okay. I’ll still live here and we can still see each other every day.”
/> His big blue eyes were shiny with tears. “You promise me you’ll still live here? You’re not going to move out?”
“Of course I’m not! How could I ever leave you?” I drew him to me and hugged him tightly. “Not even Heller wanted me to leave here. It just means that I won’t work for him for the next twelve months.”
“How are you going to survive without money?” he started worrying. “I’ll give you my pocket money every week. That will help you buy some food at least.”
I laughed. “That’s very sweet of you, Niq. But Heller will still let me use his pantry.” Wouldn’t he? Doubts crept into my mind. Maybe this hadn’t been such a good idea after all. “Anyway, I better go. I don’t want to be here when their meeting finishes. I don’t want to make Heller angry.”
I was at a loose end for the rest of the day with nothing to do. It brought back unpleasant memories of the utter boredom of being unemployed. I rang Trent and casually mentioned that I was interested in his job if it was still available. He didn’t need to know that I had my fingers and toes crossed hoping that it was. I breathed a sigh of relief when he assured me with delight that it was, but couldn’t believe Heller had let me go that easily.
“He’s suspended me from duty for a year.”
“A year, huh? Well, isn’t that convenient?”
“Isn’t it just? When do you want me to start?”
“Is tomorrow too soon? You can meet my researcher before she leaves and have a handover with her. Come to the network offices.” I jotted down the address that he gave me.
After sorting that out, I trudged down to the ground floor to the security section to hand over my staff card to Clive. The support the men offered me as I walked over to Clive’s office overwhelmed me – encouraging words, a pat on the back, a hand slap, a sympathetic glance. Ozanne was particularly distressed, genuinely upset that I was being punished so harshly, having himself received a severe reprimand and a permanent black mark against his name.
Clive took my card, his features as grim as usual. “Heller was hard on you, Tilly. All the men think so,” he said gruffly. I was touched. It was probably the nicest thing he’d ever said to me.