by B. T. Narro
I liked to think that, in actuality, Jaymes cared about my welfare and just used the straw as an excuse, but honestly I couldn’t tell.
He sent me off to the medical room, the exact place I wanted to go. I managed to hold in my smile until I was out of the armory.
Wiping the blood from my arms on my already ruined shirt, I walked into the room. The gash on my cheek felt wet, so I dabbed it with my hand and then wiped the redness off.
“My gods, did you get into a fight with a horde of cats?” Shara asked. My smile widened when I saw she was the only one there. We finally could talk. “Why are you grinning like that? Did you hit your head?”
“Only a few times.”
She put down her book and waved me toward her bed. I hid my limp as best I could.
“My gods,” she whispered, squinting in examination. “Does it sting?”
“Incredibly.”
For some reason she found my even-toned reply humorous, a laugh bursting out. Immediately, she grimaced and grabbed her side.
I reached out. “Careful.”
She recoiled. “You’re so bloody. Mayla will return any moment to help you clean and cover those cuts, but Swenn is with her. I don’t mean to be insensitive, but we don’t have much time alone and there’s a lot we need to discuss.”
“I’m so sorry about what happened to you. The attack was meant for me, you must know.”
“I do but don’t feel guilty. I went in there to surprise you. Imagine my surprise when I went to hide under your bed only to find someone else there.”
“Oh gods.”
“Yes, I’m sure I’ll be checking under my bed for months before getting in it.”
“They’re going to question Swenn,” I said, “and he’s going to lie. But I might be able to get a psychic in the room who can detect it.”
“Charlotte?”
“Not her. I’ll explain if I have time before Swenn and Mayla come back. Are there any signs of infection?”
“No, unfortunately. He’s going to live.”
“I meant you.”
She tilted her head in question. “You care more about Shara living than Swenn dying?”
“Of course!”
Her lips twisted in a cheerful grin. “I’m going to kiss you when that blood’s cleaned off.”
“About that…” I sighed as I prepared myself for the hardest thing I had to tell her. “King Quince told me he doesn’t allow any form of intimacy within the castle or between those in his army.”
“Oh.”
She looked as if I’d just told her there was no food left in the entire kingdom.
I sympathized. “I know.”
“Well…tell me what else you need to say before they get back.” There was a clear difference in mood, a distance between us I’d never felt with Shara. Even when we’d first met, I could walk beside her in silence without discomfort. But now the still room felt unbearable.
“I’m sorry.”
“It’s fine, probably for the best.”
I couldn’t let that go. “Why say that?”
She ignored the question. “What else do you know about this trial? Is there anything I should do?”
I sighed again. “Just heal. If I can get the psychic to be at the trial, then I’m going to speak—if they’ll allow me—about everything Swenn has done.”
“I’m glad to hear that.”
“Laney knows about Swenn.”
Her mouth came open.
“I attacked him in front of her,” I elaborated. “So I had to explain.”
“When did you attack him?”
“He was with his squire in the secluded section at the back of the great library when I went there to get the book of antidotes. I lost control when I saw him. You were dying, and he was responsible.”
Shara gave me a pained look. I could feel she wanted to touch just as desperately as I did.
“Why was he there?” she asked, her voice softer, both of our minds elsewhere.
“I’m not sure other than he needed somewhere to speak with his squire where they wouldn’t be disturbed.”
“What happened when you attacked him?” I could feel her gazing at my lips, my eyes locked on to hers in the same way.
“Laney stopped me.”
“Then you fought with Gram,” Shara said. “Everyone knows about that.”
“He wanted to kill me. Swenn put a bounty on my head.”
“Doesn’t surprise me.”
We became silent. I sat beside Shara, our shoulders touching. “I think that’s everything you need to know at this moment,” I said.
She looked straight into my eyes. “And they’re still not back.”
I leaned over. She turned her head to meet me, the softness of her lips stealing all my pain as we shared a kiss. Our lips played together as she inhaled a quick breath, and my heart melted.
We parted, each with a smile. “So much for following the king’s orders,” she teased.
“Just make sure no one sees us. Unfortunately that means no more sharing a bed; Quince has made people vigilant to check for that.”
“Henry ruins that anyway. Oh, you didn’t tell me about Henry.”
“I knew there was something I forgot. He’s been having doubts about his loyalty to Swenn. At least it seems that way.”
“Everything you’re telling me sounds auspicious! We might finally rid ourselves of his nature malicious. I’ll finally sleep without dreams of death. I’ll no longer have tension with each breath. I can live and work and study!” She gritted her teeth, shaking her hands near my cheeks. “I want to touch you, but you’re so bloody!” She settled for grabbing the back of my head and kissing my lips.
She shoved me away at the sound of the door opening. Unbalanced, I wavered for a moment but found my footing. “Sorry,” she whispered, grabbing her book, then changing her mind and setting it down again. She looked for somewhere to put her hands, acting completely obvious.
“Shara,” Mayla admonished, “have you been exerting yourself?”
I didn’t hear Shara’s answer as I focused on Swenn. With Laney holding one of his arms and Mayla the other, they helped him toward his bed. He averted his glance the instant it met mine as if he was disinterested. I reminded myself that Swenn’s expressions were the same as his words, insincere, beguiling. He loathed me with the same hatred that fueled my rage for him.
He shrugged off the two women helping him. “It’s embarrassing enough you must escort me across the entire castle to the bathhouse. I can at least lie down on my own.”
“If that wound opens up, you’re going to face serious dangers,” Mayla warned, taking Swenn’s elbow and guiding him onto the bed. “Medicine still runs heavy in your blood. You may not realize how slow you are until you’re falling.” She held on until she finished easing him onto his back.
“I know and thank you for your worries, even though they are too much sometimes.”
She laughed politely. It seemed so easy for Swenn to hide his true self.
“Neeko, what happened?” Mayla asked, startled when she saw my arms and cheek.
“Training accidents. Jaymes sent me here.”
“Come over here then.”
Laney sat with Shara and asked what she was reading while Mayla took me to the corner of the room. A water basin and clean towels awaited. As she cleaned my wounds, I glanced at Swenn as often as I could without arousing suspicion.
He didn’t move, just lay flat on his back. I wondered what was going through his mind. Was he nervous about the trial? Was he even capable of feeling nervous? He must be plotting, but what?
By the time my cuts were anointed and covered, Swenn still hadn’t made a sound. I thanked Mayla and thought about how I could speak to Swenn without her overhearing.
Laney approached us, greeted me, then asked Mayla, “Can we visit the library?”
“Swenn, sir,” Mayla called, “do you need anything?”
“I’m fine, thank you.”
“Take your time,” he replied.
The moment they were gone, he sat up after a quick struggle. His eyes squinted as they found me.
“Come here.”
Shara got to her feet and joined me at the side of Swenn’s bed.
CHAPTER TWENTY
Swenn began with a deep sigh. “You’re not going to believe what I’m about to tell you.”
“Then why even say it?” I asked.
“You do want to hear the truth, don’t you?”
I could’ve given a hundred different answers: a scoff, a shake of my head, an insult; all would’ve said the same thing. “Horse piss, you’re not about to tell the truth.”
“Why would I lie to you after everything that’s happened? You want me dead no matter what.”
I refused to acknowledge whether he had a point. Though…he did have a point. Sometimes I hated the way my mind worked.
“Just say whatever you want to say.”
“I didn’t tell Luke to wait in your room. He came up with that idiotic plan on his own.”
Impulsively, I didn’t believe Swenn, however I did find it strange that he was the first person I’d heard use his squire’s given name. Was it possible he cared for the man he killed?
I doubted it. “What about the reward for my murder? Are you going to deny that as well?”
“No. As I said before, there’s no reason for me to lie to you. That bounty does exist.” He paused, his jaw slack. I’d never seen the man look so defeated. “Well, it used to exist, until now. I’m done with this rivalry, Neeko. You’ve won. I’m not going to do anything more to you or Shara.”
I looked at her, wondering if she was just as skeptical as I was.
To my surprise, she slapped him across the cheek. “Stop lying!”
His hands came up only to his chest as he groaned. I moved in front of Shara, ready for his retaliation.
“I’m not lying,” he said, shockingly calm. “It's over. I know I’ve sworn to many things, promised even more, but this time I’m serious. You’re more of a threat to me while I’m trying to kill you than if I’d let you be.”
“You told Luke to kill Neeko,” Shara demanded. “Say it.”
“I could say it if you want, but it wouldn’t make it true.”
“Then why would he do it?” I asked.
“Don’t be stupid,” Swenn said, though it was the first time he’d insulted me without me feeling insulted. The tone of his voice was too collected for me to take offense. “He wanted the reward. I didn’t know about his plan until after it failed. He came to my quarters, panicked, his arm badly burned. He’s a complete dolt. I told him this many times.”
“When did you decide to kill him?” I asked to show I still didn’t believe his lies. “Was it before or after I found you in the back of the library?”
“I’ll admit I did consider it right away, but he’d been loyal to me since we met. More than the reward, he wanted to show his devotion. I couldn’t kill him.”
“I might believe you,” I said, “if it hadn’t been so easy for you to command Kayren’s death.”
“She wasn’t going to be killed, but I don’t blame you for thinking it.” Something amused him slightly, a soft chuckle coming out. “I don’t know whether to say you were lucky or unlucky to be on my balcony at the exact time of that conversation. Everything would’ve been simpler for both of us if you’d just let Gram scare her back to Cessri as he intended. You got the dimwits from Ovira involved, putting them in danger. You put yourself under the scrutiny of the king and Jaymes.” He wagged his finger. “I hope you know how close both of them are to getting rid of you. All because you saved someone who didn’t need saving.”
Shara turned to me. “Could it be true about Quince and Jaymes?”
“That could, but not what he says about letting Kayren live.”
“Having her killed would start an investigation,” Swenn argued. “Gram could easily be identified.”
“You expect me to believe you would just let her live?”
He showed me an annoyed glance. “Your stupidity is wearing down my patience. I’m tired, in pain; I just want to rest. But this is the only time we’ll have to speak, so help me by using what intelligence you have. Of course I’m letting her live. She’s probably already told everyone about the incidents at her father’s tavern. Killing her now would only cause more suspicion.”
Shara asked, “Why kill Luke if you’re so worried about causing suspicion?”
“I didn’t want to kill him. I’ve never wanted to kill.” He paused for a breath, looking up at me apologetically. “He came to me with what he’d done. I couldn’t let anyone catch us speaking in my quarters or they would assume I was involved. I took him to the back of the library to speak, getting some cold water for his burn on the way. He told me Shara was dead. I suppose he did so in order to ease my worry.”
“You contemptible pig’s ass!” Shara poked him firmly in his injured shoulder.
He growled, cupping his hand around his wound. Cursing, he kicked at her while she easily moved away from his reach.
He lost his energy instantly, still muttering curses as he used his other arm to hold himself upright in bed. “Stay back there, stupid woman. Hurting a weakened man who’s just telling the truth, something’s loose in your brain.”
Shara shook her fist. “I’m sick of you. I don’t want to look at your face anymore.”
“You won’t have to soon enough.” He grimaced as he kept himself propped up. “My trial must be coming soon. If you want to know the truth before then, you’ll keep your mouth shut.”
I put my arm on Shara’s back. Her tense muscles relaxed.
“When Neeko found us,” Swenn said, “I didn’t know what to think. How did he know we were there? Why was Laney with him, and why did she stop him from choking me? I questioned Luke about you, Shara, and he admitted you could still be alive.” Swenn scoffed. “I don’t know why everyone is capable of such stupidity. With you poisoned, Neeko clearly would come to the library looking for a recipe for the antidote.”
Swenn’s arm slipped. He nearly fell before catching himself, sucking air through his teeth.
“Nasty poison, this lofe. I never meant for you to suffer, Shara, let alone die. I only wanted Neeko gone. Luke made a poor choice. The whole castle knew soon enough that the attacker’s right arm was burned by a fireball. I told Luke to leave the castle or I would be forced to report him. There was no reason for both of us to be imprisoned. He blamed me for his mistake. We argued. He coated his dagger with poison right in front of me. I didn’t give him the chance to strike first.”
Swenn groaned, easing himself onto his back. “I must lie down. Come here, Neeko.”
I stood over him, Shara joining me. Swenn shook his head at her. “You stay back, vile woman. I won’t speak until you step back.”
She grumbled but obeyed.
“Neeko, I mean what I say. No matter what happens with my trial, I’m done trying to make you leave.”
“Even if that’s how you feel now, you’ll change your mind once you begin to worry about what I know.”
“Have you ever known me to change my mind?”
I didn’t want to admit it, but no, I hadn’t.
He read my expression, adding, “And I’m not about to start.”
“What do you want, then?” I asked.
“To be king, but I’ll settle for the master of coin.” He fluttered his hand. “Now before you start whispering to each other about how nothing I said was true, go to the other side of the room. I need to rest.” He shut his eyes.
“Swenn.”
He grumbled.
“My mother…tell me what happened.”
I felt Shara’s hand on my shoulder. “Neeko, don’t.”
“I want to know.”
Swenn’s
eyes squinted open. “Why?” He sounded sincerely sad, though I didn’t believe it for a moment.
“Because if you don’t tell me now, I’ll never know.”
“You already do know,” Swenn said. “I used the key you gave me to enter her home when she should’ve been away. She came back while I was there and confronted me about thieving. She didn’t care, though. She just wanted to know what I’d done with you. I told her I’d taken you to your father’s. She didn’t believe me. Faye knew you couldn’t possibly remember where his house was, and she knew I didn’t, either. I tried to leave, but she wouldn’t let me until I admitted that I’d left you in Lanhine without money or food and with no idea how to find your father’s house. She became enraged and attacked me. I tried to get her to stop, but she wouldn’t.”
He let out his breath. “I’m sorry,” he whispered.
“You’re not capable of being sorry.”
“I am. I regret taking you. I regret robbing Faye.”
“Regret isn’t the same thing,” I said.
He paused a moment. “I’m both sorry and regretful.”
“You’re a liar.” I imagined him killing my mother the moment she caught him, no words exchanged, just a look of shock on her face. He’d stabbed her. He’d killed her for silver. He wasn’t sorry. Regretful, yes, but only because he’d failed to get rid of me. Rage came over me, burning in my chest. “Everything you say is a lie.”
“I’ve told nothing but the truth. She would’ve killed me if I hadn’t protected myself.”
I searched the room, quickly finding a small yet sharp surgical knife.
“It’s the truth, Neeko!” Swenn yelled, sitting up with a severe grimace. I was glad to see he was in pain, though it would be nothing compared to what I was about to do. He tried to get off the bed to run, only to fall to his knees.
“You’re going to be honest, or you’re going to bleed. Your choice. She never attacked you, did she!”
Shara jumped in front of me. “The trial! Wait for the trial or they’ll hang you, too!”