What was he doing here again?
“Am I disturbing you?”His mouth turned into a full smile.
Pushing herself up from the awkward position, she nibbled her bottom lip as she climbed from the tub. Heat flooded her face, warning her that her cheeks must be as red as the floor mat she stood on. “Yes, you are. Ever hear of knocking?”
“The door was open. I yelled, but now I see why you didn’t hear me.” She didn’t need to see his gaze to know it dipped over every curve of her body. “Nice outfit.” His husky voice almost entertained her.
She blew a loose tendril of hair off her face, wishing she could blow him off too, but realized just how kinky the thought was. “What are you doing here? I thought I made it clear—”
“I guess I should have called first.” He moved away from the door, stepping into the small room and stealing all of the oxygen her parched lungs needed.
“Called so I could have told you this isn’t a good idea.” She stepped back until her bare thighs pressed against the porcelain counter. At six feet one, two hundred pounds or so of solid masculinity, he filled every available space. This was more than two people shoved into a small area. The close proximity sparked memories of the times they’d showered together...making love as the hot spray of water spilled over their soapy bodies. Her nipples tingled against the cotton of her tank, a reminder she’d passed up wearing a bra.
“And miss those Daisy Dukes? That would have been a shame.” He removed his hat and stuck it on the sink—penetrating blue eyes, prominent cheekbones and devilish grin were now open to her examination. Heat spiraled through her body as she moistened her lips, wondering if it’d be too suspicious if she splashed herself in cold water.
His gaze drifted downward and he awakened places she’d forgotten existed. A desperate moan filled her throat and she swallowed the betraying sound. How did he do that? How could he still make her squirm with one look and a sniff of his manly scent? After he’d left earlier in the week, she’d tried to forget him and it’d been no use. A man like Stryker wasn’t easily forgotten.
Last night, sitting at a restaurant with Dillon, turned out to be more of a game of Eye-Spy than a romantic evening. Each time a tall, brawny shouldered man got close to their table, she’d automatically tensed, wondering if Stryker would crash their dinner. The date had finished with her feeling ill and nixing any chance of dessert in bed.
Stryker had destroyed any chance she’d ever want more with Dillon than friendship. She’d realized this when he’d called that morning and she’d accidently called him Stryke.
And here he was again! The man had nerve.
Tossing the sponge into the tub, she removed her rubber gloves and dropped them too. She took a deep breath and shifted, catching a glimpse of her reflection in the mirror. Real cute. The messy bun, which had been perfectly fine when she was alone, now had pieces sticking out, reminding her of a porcupine. Her face was bare of makeup and a smear of cleanser covered her cheek.
The shorts he so blatantly mentioned showed way too much thigh for comfort, at least in the presence of a man who had touched those places and left long-term nerve damage—they still yearned for his attention.
Turning to him, she sighed. “You didn’t answer my question.” It was time to get this over. The sooner he left, the quicker she could take a cold shower and ease the quivering in her core.
“You know why I’m here, sweetheart.”
Removing her eyes from his imploring glare, she busied herself washing her hands with ice-cold water. The urge to soak her heated skin was almost too much to bear, but a wet T-shirt would surely give him a mixed message. She had no desire to allow things to get out of hand. Not even a bit!
Shit! Of course she did.
The prospect was tempting, but far too dangerous.
She wasn’t a mean person, and as much as her heart ached for Stryker, she had one responsibility and that was to herself. She’d come so far and couldn’t go back. “Your sister put too much belief in me, Stryke. The last time I saw your niece she was up all night with colic and your sister was having a bad case of postpartum depression.”
“Which you helped her through,” he said.
“I was there and I did what I could. You on the other hand took very good care of Lilly. You fed her, changed her diapers and stayed up with her during those times when Justine was too tired. She left her daughter to you, and you know I’m not what’s best for you or Lilly.” The words hurt, but they were true. She grabbed the towel and dried her hands.
“Are you afraid?” he asked.
“Of what? We are no longer an item, haven’t been for a very long time. You mentioned a friend, Tessa right, who I’m assuming you’re dating. Shouldn’t you ask her?” She swept around him, her shoulder brushing his chest, and waves of sensation traveled through her body. Once in the hallway, she sucked in air, but unfortunately, it didn’t quite smell as good as the Stryker-occupied space. He wore the same cologne, the spicy musk she’d picked out for him.
“There’s something you should know,” he said.
“Oh, no. Not again.” She moved into the living room and came to a dead halt. “Stryke, there’s a little girl sitting on my couch.” Leslie tensed as she looked into wide, cornflower blue eyes glaring back at her. Out of a million children, she’d know this child belonged to Stryker. She looked just like him. From lovely eyes, olive complexion and the uncanny ability to stare at one as if they could see directly into their soul.
“This is Lilly,” Stryker said.
Leslie swiveled, meeting his gaze with what she hoped was a deathly invisible laser. “I picked up on that. Can I ask what you’re doing?” she whispered.
“We decided we’d come and visit.”
“You and Lilly, or just you?” She clenched her hands into fists.
“Lilly, I’d like for you to meet Leslie, an old friend of mine.” He didn’t even seem to care that she was seething, which infuriated her more.
Leslie forced a smile on her lips and turned her cheek. The little girl didn’t say a word. In fact, she didn’t even show a flicker of emotion, but her gaze, sad and worried, drove through Leslie. “Hi, Lilly. I’ve heard such wonderful things about you.”
Still nothing.
Leslie’s heart skipped a beat and she caught Stryker with a concerned glance. “Can we speak in the kitchen?”
“Sure. We’ll be right back Lilly.”
Once out of earshot, Leslie turned on him, pointing a finger in the middle of his chest. “You don’t play fair!”
“This isn’t a game.”
“It isn’t? Then why would you bring her here? And the bigger issue, she is full of sadness. Looking into those eyes…it’s like looking into a window of sorrow.”
“I did tell you she hasn’t spoken a word since she lost her mom. Tessa said this can happen when a child has suffered trauma.”
“Can Tessa help?”
He nodded. “Lilly really likes her. Justine and Tessa were good friends so Lilly had already established a relationship with her.”
Leslie buried her face into her palms, feeling every nurturing bone in her body come to attention as if looking for a recipient she could cherish. She remembered what her own childhood was like, how she’d craved her mother’s affection, working hard for attention but never quite managing more than a side glance or half nod. “Stryke, she needs you and her therapist, not someone like me.”
“Tessa agrees she needs a female figure in her life.”
“Trust me, when she was saying a female figure, she wasn’t talking about a workaholic who had a botched childhood. I don’t even want children!”
His expression turned sober. “What? When did this happen?”
“The revelation that I don’t want kids? I don’t know, maybe since I was a screwed up kid who realized I’d never want to do this to another person.”
“We used to talk about having children.” One brow curved.
“No, you used to talk about
having kids. I’d just nod my head.”
“Wow.”
“Yes, wow, I agree.” She wrapped her arms tightly around her shoulders, suddenly feeling vulnerable. Disappointment filled his eyes and a part of her ached. She’d never voiced those words aloud, and saying them now seemed cold and heartless. She went to the sink and braced herself against the counter.
“What can I do for you, sweetheart?”
She jerked her head up and realized he wasn’t talking to her. Lilly was standing in the doorway, holding a small brown teddy bear that’d lost one eye and had worn fur. The child was little for her age. Her long hair hung untidily around her tiny shoulders and her jeans were too short. She guessed Stryker wouldn’t even think that little girls needed their hair brushed and clothes that fit. It reminded Leslie of a time in her life when no one thought of her needs either.
Lilly remained silent, plucking at the teddy bear’s ragged ear.
“Would you like a drink?” Leslie asked. The little girl nodded. Leslie took down the smallest glass from the cabinet and opened the refrigerator. “Hmm, I have juice and water. Which do you prefer?”
No answer.
“How about orange juice?” Leslie asked.
Lilly nodded.
After pouring the drink and handing it to Lilly, Leslie asked, “I bet you like cartoons. How about if I turn on the TV and we’ll find something. When I was your age, I loved Winnie the Pooh. I bet there are all sorts of choices now.” Leslie was halfway in the living room when she felt warm fingers touching her elbow. Looking down, the little girl was holding her arm. Leslie had never been around children, and this was all new, but for the first time in a long time, she was overcome with extraordinary emotion—and a sense of longing.
Finding a cartoon channel for Lilly, Leslie left the child resting on the couch with her teddy and went back into the kitchen. Stryker was sitting at the table nursing a bottle of water. “I can’t believe you’d do this to me,” she said in a lowered voice.
“Even you can’t deny that she breaks your heart,” he said.
She pushed on her temples as frustration grew. “I understand this isn’t easy for you, but…but—”
“I know you have a life.”
“Yes, I do,” she said. “You used her to get to me.”
“That’s not true.”
“It’s not? Then why did you bring her? I told you I can’t help.”
“Are you still sure of your answer?” One thick brow lifted and it held more accusation than any words.
“You can’t do this to me. I refuse to allow you to…”
“What?” he urged. He stood up and stomped toward her. She backed up but he followed until she pressed against the cabinet. “Tell me.” His warm breath swept over her cheek.
“Play me like a puppet.” Her voice was weak.
“I’m not playing you like a puppet. I never have. But since you brought it up, I sure felt like I was the one being played years ago.”
This was a conversation that had stewed for a long time, and she wasn’t prepared to handle the heat at the moment. “Why are we even discussing the past? It’s over.” Needing to do something—anything—she decided to make coffee. She needed to keep her focus on something other than him and her turbulent thoughts. She twisted around, fully aware that her bottom rubbed his crotch and the obvious bulge behind his zipper as she applied her clouded brain into measuring. One teaspoon, two, four…oh hell!
“You’re good at dodging any conversation you don’t want to have.” The tone of his voice drove through her, but his erection grew against her bare thigh. She wanted to drop the spoon from her shaking hand and take him into her palm.
Child in the next room.
That could take some getting used to.
Spoon held mid-air, she turned her cheek, meeting his gaze over her shoulder. “Poking me with that—” she slipped her gaze downward and back up, “—doesn’t make talking easy, now does it?”
He took a step back, and with a compete betrayal of her body, she missed the feel of him against her bottom.
“Don’t take it personal. The shorts show just the right amount of ass to make any man hard.”
She rolled her eyes as she filled the carafe with water. “Did you come here for my help or drive me insane? Neither is productive.”
“Believe it or not, I did come for your help and not sex, but damn, every time I’m around you I get an old feeling of anger—and a few other things.”
“Then you should have stayed away.” Once the words were out, she realized how cruel they were. She’d never been so harsh. Turning to apologize, he was already out of the kitchen. She dropped the spoon and followed him. “Where are you going?” she asked.
“I see that I’ve made a mistake. You’re right. I shouldn’t have come, obviously.” Lilly had fallen asleep and he was lifting her into his arms.
“Wait.”
He turned and his frenzied gaze pierced her skin, seeping into her soul. “Wait for what? It’s useless right? You have a life here in Shelby. You have a new man, new friends, and career. What more could you possibly need?”
He didn’t know about the long, lonely nights. Disrupted sleep with dreams of him. The guilt that took up residence in her heart. “We need to talk more. In the kitchen.” She dropped her gaze to the sleeping child. “Let her sleep. Rest is what she needs.”
He hesitated before he laid Lilly back onto the cushions, grabbed a blanket from the back of the couch and covered her. He bent and kissed her, and Leslie blinked back tears. Seeing a brawny man like Stryker so gentle and loving made her toes tingle.
Back in the privacy of the kitchen, Leslie hit start on the coffee maker. The machine gurgled and sputtered. She was glad to see it still worked.
“So when did you start drinking coffee?” he asked.
“I don’t, but you do. I thought you could use a cup.”
He tore a hand through his thick hair and waves bounced alive. “I don’t think you’ll be able to get it strong enough.”
Facing him, she held his gaze. “By the way, I’m not saying that I won’t help you. I really don’t know what I’m saying at this point. What I realize, Lilly needs a lot of affection.” Her vision blurred and she blinked.
“Yes she does.”
“The two of us arguing certainly won’t make things better.” She took down a cup.
“It seems you and I spent more time arguing back in the day than getting along.” He smirked. He leaned against the counter, relaxing and hooking his ankles. She took the opportunity to steal a gaze down wide chest, tapered waist, long legs and damn…the bulge behind his zipper made every nerve-ending tingle.
Did he ever go limp?
“That’s because we both enjoyed making up so much.” She’d lost count of how many times they’d had a quarrel that ended with a tumble in bed.
His smile cocked and a twinkle lit his eye. No doubt he remembered those times as well. He scratched his forehead. “What happened to us, Lesi?” She turned away.
“Let’s not do this. We can’t travel down that path looking for answers but there are none.”
“That’s bull shit and you know it. Don’t I deserve an explanation?”
Leslie sank into one of the chairs. “It won’t matter anymore,” she whispered.
“To you maybe. Hell, I won’t ask anymore if it bothers you.”
“I’d appreciate that.” Her hands were trembling and she laid them in her lap.
“And I’m sorry. I guess it probably does seem underhanded for me to bring Lilly here without asking. Yet, at the time, it felt right. I’m clueless. I don’t want to mess her life up more than it already is. It’s possible Justine didn’t make the right decision when she left her to me. It just kills me to think of allowing the state to take her.”
The catch in his voice ripped through her. Stryker had never been the best at revealing his feelings, but she once knew him in and out, and what she saw in him now was the closest to an emo
tional revelation she’d ever witnessed. “I think Justine knew exactly what she was doing. I think the best thing for Lilly is to get back to normalcy, to be around happy people.”
“Are you saying that I’m not happy?” His frown deepened.
“I’m saying that you’re overwhelmed and it’s obvious.”
“Okay then, where are these happy people?” he asked.
The coffee stopped dripping. She got up and poured him a cup, handing it to him. The tips of their fingers touched and a current slithered up her arm, spreading into her chest. If he’d noticed, he didn’t act like he was bothered. He wrapped his hand around the mug and she was overcome with the desire to have his fingers on her.
“It’s been a long time since you’ve made me coffee, or anything for that matter.”
She wondered if there was another meaning to his words than the obvious. Why even try to deny the craving she had for him? Prickles developed between her thighs “I’ll tell you what I have in mind, but at the moment, there’s something I need to do.”
His eyes widened. “Seems important.”
With restless bravery, she took a step closer and stood on tiptoe. He was insanely gorgeous and she only wished she was immune to beautiful eyes, full lips and iron-hard body. Before her brain came up with a thousand excuses why kissing him was a bad idea, she leaned forward and pressed her mouth against his. He was shocked and a bit stiff, but it didn’t take him long to warm up. His lips parted and his tongue swept across hers. He tasted like mint and coffee, and she wanted to lap him up.
His hands smoothed over her legs, upward to where her shorts touched thigh. She quickly stepped backed and the physical connection was broken. She didn’t look him directly in the eye.
“What the hell was that about?” His breathing was ragged.
“We needed to get that out of the way.” She touched her moist lips and forced her thoughts back on track.
“I’d say that’s kindling the fire,” he growled.
“Maybe, but I can think clearer now.”
“I’m glad you can.” He reached down and adjusted his crotch.
Second Round Cowboy (Second Chance Series) Page 3