“Copy that.”
“Colin?” Leo spoke up.
“Yeah.”
“That master shower is big enough—”
“Fuck off,” I cut him off. A fresh wave of laughter came from my team, and to my surprise I smiled. “Assholes. Got shit to do. I’ll call in later.”
“Yeah, like—” I disconnected before Jaxon could finish.
I pocketed my phone and took a moment to gather my thoughts. I could remember a time in the not so distant past when it was just Jasmin, Zane, Jaxon, Leo, Drew, Eric, and me. Then Drew retired and Linc replaced him. Thankfully, he and Jasmin sorted their shit and everyone could finally tell Jasmin the truth about what happened to her in Russia after she’d been captured. Lying to her had gone against everything in me, but it had been necessary.
Then Olivia had come along and brought Leo to his knees. I’d never seen a man fall for a woman so quickly. Not long after that, Violet barged into Jaxon’s life, bringing her twin brother, Declan, with her. Then Eric died. A moment in time that will haunt me forever. He selflessly gave his life to save the team. I still missed him every fucking day. Now Zane had Ivy. And somehow, she’d done the impossible and rounded his jagged and sharp pieces. He was still a ruthless son of a bitch, but with her, he was a different man. He showed her a side of himself he’d never shown us.
Was it possible Erin could be that for me? The woman who could take all the broken and splintered fragments of my soul and puzzle them back together.
“That bad, huh?” Erin’s voice pulled me from my thoughts.
I opened my eyes to find her sitting on the stairs with nothing but a towel wrapped around her body. Good Christ, she was beautiful. Even with the worry lines on her forehead and puffy, red eyes, she was prettier than any woman I’d ever seen. I hated that she’d obviously waited until she’d been alone to cry. I didn’t want her to hide anything from me. Not anymore. I wanted her to seek me out when she needed comfort and reassurance. She’d been alone for far too long.
“I’ve been in worse situations.”
“Someone really wants to kill me?”
Her whispered words gutted me. I was serious when I told Zane he only had a few days left. There were places I could stash her where no one would find her and I could go in search of this Shultz guy by myself. I didn’t care what it took, or what happened to me as long as, in the end, she was safe.
“No, sunshine. There’s nothing pointing to that.”
“So, just take me then.”
“What are you doing down here?” I asked, not wanting to answer.
“I don’t have clean clothes. My bag’s in the car.”
“Damn. I’m sorry. Give me a second.”
I jogged out to the car and retrieved both packs as quickly as I could. I took a few deep, cleansing breaths and tried to rein in my anger at the situation. I also needed the time to get my libido in check. We may’ve been in the middle of an uncomfortable conversation, but I was still a man. And she was a sexy woman, with only a towel wrapped around what I knew was a terrific body. I’d have to be dead for my cock not to jump and take notice.
When I got back into the house she was still sitting in the same spot. “Come on. Let’s get you dressed before you get cold.”
She nodded but didn’t speak when she stood and went up the stairs. I tried my hardest to keep my eyes off her ass, but it was damn near impossible. The sexy sway of her hips called to me. With each step the towel gathered, revealing more skin. Toned, tanned flesh I wished I could sink my teeth into.
“Thanks.” I hated the fear I could hear.
I set the bags down on the bed and pulled her close. “I’m gonna keep you safe.”
“I’d rather die than let them take me.”
“What?”
“I know what they’d do to me. It’ll make what happened to Olivia look like a walk in the park. If someone wants me it’s so they can torture my father. I can’t . . . I couldn’t . . . I wouldn’t survive that.”
“I promise you, I’ll do everything in my power to stop that from happening or die trying,” I vowed.
“What did Zane say?”
“Can we get you dressed and fed first? Then I’ll tell you what I know.”
“Promise?”
“Promise.”
She dipped her chin and gave me a nod before she dropped the towel and turned to open her bag. My hands shook with need, and I shoved them in my pockets before I could reach out to touch her. My feet were cemented in place as I watched her dress. When she finally pulled a shirt over her head, covering the last of her exposed skin, I reached a hand out and waited for her to take it.
“Let’s go make something for dinner.”
She let me lead her back downstairs and into the kitchen. With very little conversation we made dinner together. By the time we’d sat down to eat, and I’d filled her in on what the team had found, she’d pulled further into herself. When I suggested we call it a night, she agreed without argument. I didn’t like her easy acquiescence, I fucking hated that she looked and sounded defeated. I wanted her full of snark and humor. Confident and at peace.
I helped Erin into bed and didn’t bother to leave the room when I changed into a pair of sweats. She stared blankly at the ceiling, and I silently vowed to take out every person who was responsible for her retreat.
“Come here, Erin.”
She rolled to her side and with tear filled eyes whispered, “Make love to me. Please make me forget.”
“No, sunshine. But I’ll hold you.”
“But you said—”
“I know what I said. And I stand by my previous statement. However, the first time I make love to you, it will not be because you want an escape. It will be because you want me so badly, you’re mindless.”
“But I do want you. I’ve wanted you for months.”
Once again, I was at war with myself. I knew what it felt like to want to escape from the thoughts racing through your head, even if for only a little while. However, I couldn’t give her what she wanted, not fully. I wouldn’t be a regret; someone she looked back on with remorse or worse—shame. But I could give her something.
“Kiss me, Erin.”
She started to lower herself and I met her halfway, immediately taking over. My hands cupped her face and pulled her closer. All I needed was for her to take the first step and I’d lead her where I wanted her. The kiss was smoldering from the moment our lips touched and our tongues tangled. Damn, the woman could steal my breath. Erin broke the kiss, ripped her shirt over her head, tossing it aside, and I was dumbstruck for a moment; she was perfect. Not too big, not too small. The right amount of mouthful, with pink, puckered nipples I needed to taste.
I leaned up and sucked one into my mouth. Her moan filled the silence, and I watched her eyes flutter closed. I pulled off and moved to the other side. She was struggling to get her pants off and with an audible pop she freed her nipple from my mouth to accommodate her movement. And seconds later she was gloriously naked. Only this time, I could touch her.
“Are you sure?”
“Yes.”
Her answer was certain and quick.
“Roll to your back.”
She licked her lips, dropped to her back, and my cock jumped at the sight before me. So pretty. So innocent. I shouldn’t have allowed things to go as far as they had, but I wasn’t stopping. I wasn’t going to deny either of us what we both wanted any longer.
I came up on my elbow and looked down at her. “Tell me if I’m hurting you or if you want me to stop.”
A slow, sexy grin settled on her lips, and she answered, “I will.”
The smile told me she thought she’d gotten her way. She hadn’t. But she was soon going to learn, I didn’t need to make love to her to make her forget. My fingers would be enough. And next time, and there would be a next time, she’d learn that my mouth was even better.
Chapter 11
I couldn’t remember a time I’d been so nervous. Sure
, I’d yanked off my clothes bold as brass but inside I was anxious. Just because I’d never inserted part A into part B didn’t mean I’d never fooled around before. But this felt different. I hadn’t asked but I assumed Colin was well and thoroughly experienced when it came to sex. I was so worried I wasn’t even sure where to put my hands.
“Relax,” he murmured in my ear before he placed a soft kiss on my neck. “We’re gonna take this nice and slow.” His tongue trailed down the side of my neck, over my collarbone, and down the slope of my boob. “I want to taste every inch of you.”
Oh, Lord.
He continued his exploration, licking around one areola then the other. I jolted when his hand moved from my hip, his thumb traced the crease of my panty line, or what would have been, had I been wearing any.
“Easy, sunshine. We’re goin’ slow, remember?”
“Uh huh.”
Colin’s hand hadn’t moved, but his mouth did. He sucked and nibbled and licked all around my breasts and down to my stomach. When his tongue dipped into my bellybutton, I lifted my hips, causing his hand to slip farther between my thighs.
“Touch me.”
“Not yet.”
His torturous exploration of my body seemed to go on for hours. His hands and mouth seemed to touch me everywhere but where I wanted him to. I finally had enough and wrapped my hand around his wrist and tried to bring it to where I needed it.
“Spread your legs wider,” he told me but didn’t allow me to force his hand. “Put your leg over my hip, sunshine. I want you completely open.”
I was way past being embarrassed and immediately put my leg over his hip, giving him full access to my most private parts.
As his hand slid closer to my core, he whispered, “Are you sure?”
“Yes.”
“Kiss me, Erin.” His throaty demand sent shivers down my arms.
I was so lost in the magic I felt when our lips connected, it took me a moment to register his finger was gliding up and down my slit until he circled my wetness and pushed in.
“Holy—”
He pulled the digit out and slid two back in. My grip around his wrist tightened and my nails dug in. I needed something to hold onto. Something to ground myself as he envoked a riot of sensations. I lifted my head until my mouth latched onto his neck. He tilted his head, giving me better access. I kissed every part I could reach as his fingers stroked faster.
“Oh, God,” I moaned. “More.” I lifted my ass off the bed, trying to get his fingers deeper.
He twisted his hand and rubbed along the top of my inner muscles and added his thumb to my clit. The added stimulation had me biting down on his neck.
“Christ,” he groaned but made no move to make me stop abusing his skin.
I fought the urge to close my legs as the tingling began, and heat started to spread over my entire body.
“That’s it, Erin. You’re almost there.”
“I can’t.”
I started to close my legs, trying to ward off the explosion that was building.
“You can, baby. You’re there. I can feel it. Let go.”
His thumb pressed down harder, and my hips bucked. It was too late, I couldn’t stop it. I screwed my eyes closed and let the orgasm take over.
“Damn. So, so, pretty.” He was slowing his movements, bringing me back to earth, and before I was ready his hand disappeared from between my legs and his fingers were in his mouth. “You taste just as good as I knew you would.” I must’ve looked shocked he’d sucked my essence off his fingers, well, because I was, but his chuckle confirmed he’d seen my surprise.
“Kiss me, Colin.”
“Kinky,” he whispered and brushed his lips against mine. “Wanna taste yourself on my tongue, do ya?”
I didn’t bother answering, instead, I took what I wanted and licked the seam of his lips until he opened. I would be perfectly happy lying in his arms kissing him for the rest of my life.
Whoa. Where did that come from? It was too soon to be thinking about the rest of my life. But there it was, niggling in the back of my mind. Colin was everything I’d hoped to find in the man I’d share my life with.
All too soon he broke away, kissing the corner of my mouth, then my forehead, and tucked me close to his side.
“It’s been a long day, we should get some sleep.”
“What about you?”
“What about me?”
“You didn’t—”
“Sunshine, all I need is this. You in my arms, relaxed, and ready for a good night’s sleep.”
I cuddled in closer and willed my tears not to come. I’d never felt more safe and secure in all my life. Not even when I was a teenager living behind a tall metal gate with armed men standing guard.
Chapter 12
I was five minutes away from going thermonuclear. We’d been at the cabin for five days and had barely made any headway. Erin and I had just finished lunch when Zane had texted to tell me he needed to talk and would call in an hour. He wanted Erin present and was going to send some images for her to look at. I wanted her as far away from this as possible. She was still trying to put on a brave front, but each night when we got into bed, she begged me to hold her. Not that she had to ask, I wanted her tucked close. We’d only been sharing a bed for a little more than a week now, and I couldn’t imagine her anywhere else but next to me.
Last night when she’d asked me to make love to her, I’d gotten her off using my fingers and mouth again. Much to my cock’s dismay, I still hadn’t allowed her to touch me. At first, it was because I didn’t want to take advantage of her vulnerability. Now, it was because I wanted more. I had to know if it was me she wanted or if I was simply convenient. It would gut me if the only reason she wanted to be with me was because of some sort of hero worship. Not that I was a hero, but she did view me as the man that was keeping her alive.
She’d mentioned more than once, how she’d rather die than be kidnapped. I understood her fear, however, it killed me the choice was even on her radar. She should be out living her life, smiling, happy, carefree, and not thinking about lose-lose options.
“Ready?” I asked, sitting next to Erin on the couch.
“Yes,” she answered in the affirmative, but her shaky voice told me she was anything but.
I answered the phone, but before Zane could start I asked him to wait and muted the phone.
“You don’t have to do this,” I told her.
“Yes, I do.”
“You don’t. But more than that, you don’t have to pretend with me. I know you’re scared. And, sunshine, that’s okay. I hate watching you worry, but I really hate that you think you have to hide from me.”
“I just want to get this over with.”
“All right.”
Knowing I wasn’t going to get Erin to open up while I had Zane on hold and the images she needed to look at loomed over her head, I gave in.
“I’m back,” I told Zane.
“You logged in?”
“I am.”
Once I confirmed my computer was online and on Z Corps network, a picture of Erin and a man came onto the screen of my laptop.
“Do you know this man, Erin?” Zane asked.
“Yeah. That’s Hal Simpson. He’s a donor. I believe he’s an investment banker.”
“How long have you known him?”
Erin sat quietly for a moment, twisting her hands in her lap. Her knee was shaking, and her discomfort came off in waves.
“Um, I’d say, about a year. Maybe a little less. I’m trying to remember what event I first met him at, but there have been so many it’s hard to say.”
“Has he ever expressed interest in you?”
My irritation spiked at Zane’s inquiry, I didn’t like where this line of questioning was going.
“In me personally? I don’t think so. And if he was interested, he never did anything weird if that’s what you’re asking.”
“That’s exactly what I’m asking. Did he ever ask yo
u out? Try and get you alone? Say or do something that made you uncomfortable? Ask too many questions about your dad?”
“No. He never asked me out. But now that you mention my dad, he never asked anything about him. Strange.”
“Why is that strange?” I asked.
“Because everyone always asks. And I mean, everyone. Some are more invasive than others. But since he’s become president there hasn’t been a single person, other than Liv, that hasn’t asked me something about him.”
I could believe that. People were inherently nosey. They wouldn’t be able to help themselves, they’d have to ask her something about her dad, even if it was small.
“It’s actually not so strange.” Garrett entered the conversation. The screen in front of us changed to a side-by-side picture. The right side was a professional portrait of Hal Simpson and the left was a cropped image of him from the charity event. “Hal Simpson is Henry Shultz, the man who is behind surveilling your apartment and the man who hired the men to kidnap you.”
Erin’s entire being shifted from unease to utter terror. I was happy the team couldn’t see us, not that I gave a fuck. I pulled Erin onto my lap. Fucking Garrett had to bring up the fact someone wanted to take her—her biggest fear.
“However, his name is not Hal Simpson; it’s actually Michael Greenwold. He works for the NSA.”
“Why would someone from the National Security Agency pretend to be someone else? And why would they want to hurt me?”
“Christ,” I muttered. “How far down the rabbit hole are we?” I asked the team.
“So far I’ll be shocked if we’ll ever find our way out. Greenwold is the head of an NSA counter-intelligence team. POTUS shut down the special collection service unit, code named Angel, when he found out a tech-specialist wrote a program to spy on the general population of US citizens. Millions of emails and phone calls were intercepted.”
“Found out? How did he find out?” I inquired.
“Tom’s not being forthcoming about how he received his intel. Nor he is telling us the full scope of the program. The only thing he’s willing to provide is that it was presented as a data-dump and back-up system for all intelligence gathered overseas. He’s aware there’s a shadow team working, mostly in the black, but it was his understanding the team was concentrating on cyber counter-intel and system security. They employ some of the most effective hackers in the world.”
Rescuing Erin (Special Forces: Operation Alpha) (Red Team Book 5) Page 8