I hold up my wrist. “Got my chip.”
“So you’re one of us now.” She nods thoughtfully, like she’s both happy and sad about this news.
I have the same feeling as her about this. “You lied to me, by the way.”
She looks over at me, raising one eyebrow.
I hold up my wrist again. “It hurt like a bitch.”
She laughs.
***
I head to my locker to grab a change of clothes, wanting to get to the showers before they are full with the girls who were just thrown in the pool. When I open my locker, the backpack I wore today has been placed inside, on top of my clothes. I pick it up and bury it at the bottom, underneath the stacks of t-shirts. I’m not sure why Will has given it to me, and wonder if it’s discovered, will I be in trouble?
Since I’m the first one to the showers, I head to the last stall on the end. It’s the most private. I undress in the tiny stall while the water heats up. I step under the stream of hot water – it’s almost too hot – but I force myself to stay under it until I get used to it. The heat of the water works wonders at relaxing my tired muscles.
I lather up my hair and think about my mission into the woods with Will. I still didn’t know much about him, and he seemed to like it that way. I step back under the water to rinse the soap from my hair.
The lights flicker once, then shut off, plunging me into complete blackness. I hear footsteps, calculated and slow, moving towards me.
“Hello?” I call out. Soap bubbles stream down my face, stinging my eyes.
The footsteps continue down the length of the girls’ bathroom, moving toward me. In the darkness, the bathroom takes on an eerie quality, cold, sterile and much too quiet, except for the spray of water and the footsteps, which are getting closer. I consider staying quiet, trying to hide somehow, but I know it’s no use. Whoever’s out there knows I’m in here.
I move away from the water, and press my back against the cold tile wall, wanting to be as far away from the door as possible. I’m probably freaking myself out over nothing, maybe it’s just a prank by some of the other girls. They’re just trying to scare me.
My eyes begin to adjust to the darkness, and I can make out black boots standing in front of my stall door. Boots like Will’s or O’Donovan’s. Or Kane’s. Then I see the locking mechanism on the stall door begin to slowly turn, unlocking itself. I stare in disbelief, not even daring to breathe.
When the door swings open, Kane’s face is draped in shadows, but even in the darkness I can see the gleam of hatred for me burning in his eyes. I don’t understand what I could have done to make him hate me so much.
“Don’t think for a second that your little play-date today will go unnoticed,” he snarls. He lifts my towel from the hook and tosses it onto the shower floor at my feet.
I grab for it, but it’s pointless. It’s already soaking wet. Kane laughs as I lunge for it, holding the dripping towel in my hands. His laugh is bitter and grates against my skin. I don’t cower; I don’t back away. I don’t even try to cover myself. “Are we done here?” I ask instead, calmly shutting off the water.
I step out of the shower and begin drying myself with my old clothes and when I look up, he’s gone. I release a breath I’ve been holding and my knees begin to shake. I pull on my clean clothes and hurry from the bathroom.
My clothes cling to my still damp body, and my hair is dripping down my back when I burst into the bunker out of breath. Sam’s head whips around toward me and her eyes lock on mine. Without saying a word, she gets up from her card game and follows me into the dorm.
“What happened? You look like you saw a ghost.” She places her hands on my shoulders, turning me to face her.
I’m still out of breath from the encounter with Kane. “Kane came in when I was in the shower.” I suck in another breath. “He shut off the lights and opened up my stall door.”
“What the hell? Are you okay?”
I nod.
“Did he … do anything to you?” Her eyes grow large with worry.
“No. He just tried to scare me. It seemed like some sort of warning, only I don’t know what for.”
“I shouldn’t have let you go alone.”
“No, Sam – this wasn’t your fault.” I don’t want her feeling guilty. She’s done enough to help me, and there’s no way she could’ve known this would happen. “I can handle it.”
“Well, I’ll help you. You’re not alone here. I’ll keep a better eye out for you.”
“Thank you.” I can feel my hair dripping all over her hands, still resting on my shoulders.
“Did you even dry off?” She smiles.
“Not really. I just wanted to get the hell out of there.”
She guides me over to her bed and I sit on the end while she towel dries my hair, then combs it out and secures it back in a braid, just like the first night I met her.
I want nothing more than to just crawl into bed, hide under my sheets and forget about everything, but I know that’s probably just what Kane would want. I want him to know he can’t scare me, that I’m unbreakable. So instead, I put on a smile and follow Sam and Sabrina to dinner, where we tell stories and laugh about the days we’ve had. It’s exactly what I need after the day I’ve had.
Chapter 12
Through the use of mindscan and the segregation of Rejects, scientists believe we’re on our way to eliminating most major diseases by removing flawed humans from the mating pool. It is a way to cleanse society, of both mentally and medically inadequate beings.
- History of the Medical Revolution, Chapter Six
I try to piece together what I know so far. My mother was here and became pregnant; though that isn’t an avenue it will do me any good to explore, according to O’Donovan. My father was a neuroscientist. I don’t really even know what that means, but apparently he was working for the government and was some hot shot with promising research. He no doubt betrayed them when he took up with a mental patient. I shudder to think what would become of someone who does that – betrays the government and their precious operation that way.
I also know that Will seems to be gentle with me when no one’s watching. I think of the time he visited me in the hospital, when he wiped away the blood on my lip, and how he takes a hands-on approach to teach me to protect myself when we’re alone. Then I remembered that isn’t entirely true. Rena was there the time he showed me how to fire a pulse gun. Did that mean Rena was someone to be trusted, too? I had to find a way to talk with her again. I know she knew more than she was letting on.
The last thing that was starting to become clear to me was that Will was preparing me for something. The training schedule here as well as the importance he placed on learning to use weapons. I didn’t understand what it was all for. It felt like we were preparing for something big, only I didn’t know what.
“Eve, you’re not eating; everything all right?” Alex asks, breaking my concentration.
I look up from the bowl of oatmeal I’ve been absently stirring with my spoon. It’s now a congealed mess of lumps. “Oh, yeah. Sorry.”
“Here.” Alex replaces my brown spotted banana with his perfectly ripe one.
“Thanks.” I take it and peel the skin back. Alex watches until I take a bite, then resumes eating his oatmeal, but his eyes keep flickering back to mine. “So, Will says we’ve got a big challenge coming up. Any ideas what it might be?”
“There’s one big challenge every fall,” Sabrina says. “It’s what we’ve been training for. Last year they went on an overnight camping trip through the woods. It was sort of like a survival test and everything rolled into one.”
My stomach drops at the thought that Will was giving me a leg up by taking me into the woods yesterday. I manage another bite of the banana, since Alex is back to watching me.
***
The bruises from my fight with Bryce have faded, as have the shadows in the crooks of my arms. But new aches and pains replace them. My legs are sore
from all the running, my wrists still slightly chafed from struggling against the ropes, and the area around my chip is bruised and swollen, almost as if my body knows this thing is foreign and wants to expel it. If only it were that easy.
But I have no time to focus on my sore, tired body. We are running drills through an obstacle course set up in the gym today. My eyes dart to the end, but thankfully there doesn’t seem to be any fighting ring this time.
Kane has us line up at the starting line in groups of four. Drew and Bryce push their way to the front, wanting to be the first to go. I let everyone pass me by, and get in line at the very end, wanting to learn from those who go first.
Kane gives a quick blast into his whistle and the guys take off. They run full force down the length of the gym, and when they reach the first set of tires, they skip and raise their knees, hopping in and out of the tires. Next they reach the ropes suspended from the ceiling and aggressively climb hand over hand until they’ve reached the top. No one reaches up to tag it like I did that day. They slide down and drop to the ground long before they’re to the bottom. Bryce is now in the lead, and edges out his competition, as he charges into a big punching bag that’s on a rolling track. He shoves it back with everything he has until it slams to a stop at the end of the track. He then runs back to the start of the course. He scans his barcode at the time pod to record his time.
The whole course takes the guys about two minutes to complete. It’s clear they’ve done it before and are only trying to better their times. I look to the girls around me who wait for their chance. Sam is in the next group that’s just getting ready to go. She’ll be matched up against Jake, Alex and a guy I haven’t officially met yet. I can tell by her smile that she doesn’t care that she’s the only girl, or that she might not be as strong as the others, and the fact that she just doesn’t care inspires me.
So what if I’m the smallest one here? That I’m barely over five feet or top the scale at one hundred and three pounds? I try to think of how I could use everything I’ve got to my advantage. I decide maybe, just maybe, my advantage will be my size. I’m small and quick and my feet will fit easily within the openings of the tires, so I won’t get tangled up and trip like many of the others do. And suddenly, I’m itching to try this course.
I move up and join the group with Sam and the guys. I tap Alex on the shoulder, knowing he’ll let me trade places with him. He gives me a strange smile and steps back, letting me take his spot. Sam gives me a wide grin, like she’s proud of me. I’m proud of me, too. I won’t let people like Kane, Drew or Bryce make me feel weak. I know my mother would like this, too.
Kane brings the whistle to his lips, and I settle back on one heel, ready to spring forward when I hear it blast, but then he notices me and lets the whistle fall from his mouth. He squints, giving me a long, hate-filled look, then gives the whistle a sharp blast and we spring forward.
I don’t pay attention to anyone else around me, and instead sprint with everything I have for the tires. I’m the first one in my group to reach them and I easily step through the openings at their centers, navigating my way through. Sam and the others are getting closer. I hear them trip and swear under their breath as they try to catch up.
When I reach the ropes, I pick the one that will leave me closer to the next obstacle and take off upward. The ropes beside me begin swinging as the others start to climb. The guys quickly overtake both Sam and I on the ropes, but not by much. When I touch down on the floor, I tuck my chin to my chest and run harder than I ever have before, pumping my arms at my sides. I pass by Sam, and I’m right at the heels of Jake, when I slam into the punching bag. It nearly knocks the wind out of me. It feels like slamming into a wall, but I dig my heels in and push it little by little until it’s all the way across the room. When I reach the finish line, I come in second, right behind Jake.
Sam comes in behind me, out of breath, but still smiling. “Damn, Eve. Didn’t know you had it in you.” She claps me on the back, and we wait at the end of the line with Sabrina – whose group is up next. She hops nervously on the balls of her feet. “You got this, B,” Sam says, patting Sabrina’s butt.
I hear low voices, and glance behind me. Lexi is last in line, and she’s standing with Will, looking up at him, her hand on his forearm. His face is expressionless and after a second, his eyes flick over to mine. I turn just in time to see Sabrina take off from the starting line. I join Sam in cheering for her. Though I’m curious about what’s going on between Lexi and Will, the last thing I want is to be caught looking over at them. Lexi already doesn’t like me and I don’t want to give her, or anyone here, another reason to have a problem with me. I have enough enemies already.
Alex comes up beside me and knocks his shoulder into mine. “Good job, Eve.”
“Oh, thanks.”
I smile, and he places his arm across my shoulders. I feel like I’m being watched and when I glance up, Will’s looking at me again; actually, he’s looking at Alex’s arm that rests across my shoulders. A frown tugs one corner of his mouth down.
“Should we go to lunch?” I ask, and let Alex steer me from the gym.
Chapter 13
That night, I make sure to shower when the bathrooms are at their busiest. I’m trying not to be afraid of Kane, but that doesn’t mean I have a death wish. When I make it back to the dorms, Lexi is standing in the middle of a group of girls, reading from a file. I stop dead in my tracks.
“The patient was the result of an illegitimate pairing,” she reads. “Her mindscan results were inconclusive.”
Lexi has my file. She must have taken it from Will’s room. I imagine them lounging on his bed, reading it together, laughing.
“Mother was mentally insane and was discharged from the program. Father was …”
I lunge for the file. “Give me that!”
Lexi holds it up over her head. I jump and swing my arms reaching for it, but it’s no use. “What? I think we deserve to know who’s staying in the dorms with us, don’t you ladies?”
A few of the girls nod their heads. “Let her read it,” someone says.
She holds it up out of my reach and continues reading. “Brain activity – normal,
intellect – normal, mental determination – high.” She snaps it closed and tosses it to me. “This is boring.”
I grab for it, but the pages slip through my hands and flutter to the floor, scattering at our feet. I bend down to pick them and find that Sam, Sabrina and a girl named Bailey have bent down to help me gather the pages. They hand them to me, and I stuff everything back inside the file.
I hear the word inconclusive being whispered around me and feel eyes pricking my skin.
“Are you okay?” Sam asks, looking concerned.
I nod and stand up with the file. “I just want to be alone right now.” She nods and lets me walk past.
Clutching the file to my chest, I head through the dorm, through the bunker and out into the hallway. At this time of night it’s deserted, and I slide down the wall to the floor. In the dim light, I study each page of my file. There are fourteen pages total. I pour over every word.
The first page is a transmission of my mindscan, dated on my sixteenth birthday. My answers to the questions before the mindscan started are the first things listed. My favorite color: midnight blue, my favorite food: chocolate. These words now seem meaningless, immature, like they are part of a life that doesn’t belong to me.
Farther down the page there are little jagged lines that show my heart rate, my brain activity, my breathing, but I don’t know what I’m looking for. The words printed at the bottom of the page stare up at me. The mindscan had no affect on her brain. That seems like a strange way to phrase it. I didn’t think the mindscan was supposed to affect your brain, but rather just see what was in there.
All the results of the tests I completed with Dr. Nolan are there. I scored average on most of them. But my sense of self-preservation is marked as low. That strikes me as odd. It
implies that I don’t care about guarding myself from risks. Then I remember all the times I’ve stood bold in the face of danger, refusing to be vulnerable, and I decide that maybe it’s accurate after all.
I see Will’s messy handwriting scrawled unevenly across the pages of notes on my physical tests. Physically weak, but determined to succeed. Sense of drive is high. Acts with courage when faced with challenges, his last entry says. Maybe he knows me better than I know myself.
I also learn that my father’s name was Reid Elway. I whisper it aloud in the hallway, but it sounds foreign on my lips. There are no details of what became of him. Like they could stamp out someone’s whole existence when it didn’t fit in with their plan.
The door to the bunker opens and Sam peeks out, spotting me on the floor. Alex is behind her. She comes and sits down beside me. Alex sits on my other side. No one speaks for the first few minutes. I close the file and place it on my lap. Even though there’s nothing all that interesting, I still have the sense to guard it from their eyes.
“They all acted like I was diseased when they heard the word inconclusive,” I whisper.
“Psshhh,” Sam says. “What the hell do they know?” She reaches over and squeezes my knee. “They’re no different from you or me.”
Sam’s words are laced with confidence, but it does little to convince me. I know I am different. I was starting to see that every day that I stayed here. There is something different about me – my mind – that makes me a target.
Alex takes my hand from my lap and sets it in his, pressing his palm to mine. I have the sense to pull my hand away, but I don’t. I know that them being here means they don’t care about some stupid test result, and for that I’m grateful. I release a sigh and let my head rest against Alex’s shoulder. Though I know I shouldn’t encourage him, in this moment I just don’t care.
After lights out, I’m still too wound up to sleep. And If I am to survive here, I need to strengthen my abilities. I slip out of bed and head down the hall. Though I was timid the first time I stepped inside the gym, now I am sure-footed. Even in the darkness, I walk straight for the weight benches shoved in the corner.
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