by Lena Hart
“I know, Truth. You don’t have to give me a lecture on the dangers of drugs and alcohol. I haven’t had a drink since that night and I plan to keep it that way. I wasted a year letting myself get shitfaced. I won’t let myself go back to that.”
The corner of her brows turned down and he couldn’t stand the pity he saw in them. He hadn’t meant to say all of that, but a part of him needed her to understand that he was much stronger than he had been a year ago.
“Jackson, I know how hard this year must have been for you. It’s been hard on me too.”
The muscles around his neck and shoulders tensed at the direction the words were taking. The last thing he wanted was to compare notes of their grief, or discuss how they had been coping with Danny’s death.
“If you ever want to talk—”
“Actually, I’m getting a bit worn out,” he interrupted. “If you don’t mind, I’d like to get some sleep.”
An awkward silence lingered between them until she finally rose from the bed and picked up the food tray.
“Sure,” she murmured. “Get some rest. Just call out if you need anything.”
Jackson shut his eyes and didn’t open them until he heard the silent click of the door pulling close. He hated the dejection he heard in her voice, but he couldn’t do anything about it. She wanted him to share feelings he struggled every day to keep buried.
If that was her intention, it was going to be a long, miserable week. The best thing for him to do would be to avoid her.
Yet, how could he when he didn’t think he could take her leaving him again.
Truth sat down on the edge of the bed and glanced around Danny’s old room.
It was just as she remembered it. He had joked that the room was hers to do what she liked, but she had left it exactly how he kept it. She understood why Danny had made the offer. He had wanted her to feel at home here, while he was off traveling the world with his band.
But she should have been with her husband.
Unfortunately, her circumstances hadn’t allowed for it and she had been left here to live with the most infuriating man she had ever met.
Now, one year later, Jackson was more a pain than she remembered.
Well, what did you expect?
The way they had left things last time had not been pleasant for either of them. Without notice, or even a goodbye, she had accepted a position with a travel nurse agency and had been on the first flight out. She was certain he hadn’t even noticed she was gone until months later.
Now, she was back, forcing her way into his life.
Truth sighed and fell back on the bed. As much as she tried to disguise, she couldn’t fool herself. She was hear because she cared about. More than she should. She still thought about that moment in his arms, and with those thoughts came all the guilt and shame. She should miss Danny’s kisses the same way she craved Jackson’s. But she didn’t, and that to her felt like the biggest betrayal.
Suddenly, a loud crash came from the other room. Truth bolted up in the bed. It was followed by a loud thud, and she jumped up from the bed. Slipping into her bathrobe, she rushed down the hall to Jackson’s room. Another loud thud came from inside and Truth hurried her steps.
“Jackson?”
When he didn’t respond, Truth threw open the door and found him leaning against the wall, trying to reach for his fallen crutch. His head ripped over at her as he braced his weight on his other leg.
“Damn it, Truth. Can’t you knock?”
She went to him and picked up the crutch, ignoring his surliness. Something she was getting good at.
“What are you doing out of bed?”
He took the crutch from her and started toward the door. “I need to take a piss.”
Truth followed closely after him as he carefully limped his way to the bathroom. “Didn’t the hospital give you some portable urinals to use at home?”
“The last thing I want to do is piss in a plastic tube and have it sitting on my nightstand.”
Truth pursed her lips. When would he get it through his thick skull that he was still in recovery?
“The more strain you put on that leg, the longer you prolong your recovery. You really need to stay off of it.”
“I will as soon as I take care of my business.”
“Do you need any help?”
Jackson froze at the bathroom doorway and threw her an incredulous look. “Help me piss? Get real.”
Truth rolled her eyes. “I’m a nurse, remember? I’ve helped plenty of people to the bathroom. It’s no big deal.”
“I’m not one of your patients, honey. I’m bigger than you and not as weak as you think.”
“Oh, yeah? Then why are your arms trembling?” When he didn’t acknowledge that bit of scrutiny, she forged on. “I may be half your size, but I’m stronger than I look and there’s nothing wrong with needing help. Even if it’s coming from someone smaller than you.”
“Well, when I need your help playing with my joystick, I’ll yell for you.” He hobbled into the bathroom and shut the door in her face.
Truth frowned at the closed door. If he thought he could shock or get a rise out of her with his crassness, he would have to try harder.
“I spent three months working in a hospital in the Bronx, Jackson. You can’t scare me off. I’ve heard and seen it all.”
He didn’t respond, and she didn’t expect him to. She waited patiently for him to finish so she could escort him back to his room. When the door finally came open, they didn’t say a word to each other. She just followed behind him again until he eased himself back into bed. Truth reached for the crutches, but he waved her away.
“I got it.”
Truth stood close, ready and waiting in case he needed her. As he propped the crutches against the nightstand, her gaze fell on the two prescription bottles there. One was already empty, and the other was almost there. Truth frowned and picked up the amber bottle. She was certain she had moved them into the medicine cabinet when she’d been cleaning up earlier.
A quick scan of the bottle revealed that it was indeed running short and the prescription had recently been filled. She couldn’t understand why he needed such strong medicine when over-the-counter painkillers would have been enough.
She then remembered what he’d told her about his drinking and she glanced at him, concerned. Was he trading one substance for another just to numb the real pain he refused to talk with her about?
Her hand tightened around the bottle then she slipped it into the pocket of her robe.
Jackson swung his gaze toward her. “What was that?”
She hesitated for the briefest of moments. “Your pills. I’m taking them with me.”
“Why?”
“I think it’s best if I administer them to you. Make sure you’re sticking to your dosing schedule.”
His face hardened. “Stop treating me like an addict. I’m not self-medicating, now put them back.”
She shook her head. Whether it was intentional or not, he was clearly over medicating yet barely over his dependency to alcohol. She had come back to help him recover and that included all of him.
He would have to learn to face his pain head on or find another way to cope with it.
“Sorry, Jackson, but I can’t do that.”
“Damn it, Truth, this isn’t up for debate. I—”
“I’m glad you realized that,” she interrupted briskly. “Good night.”
She quickly left his room, not giving him a chance to fight her on this because she wasn’t backing down.
Not on this.
Seven
Truth stared down at her fully loaded trunk and wondered if she had gone overboard with the shopping. Then again, the way Jackson ate she may not have bought enough.
She chuckled at that and slammed the trunk shut. She was relieved that the awkwardness of last night hadn’t spilled into that morning when she’d brought him what breakfast she could scramble together from his meager food suppl
y. He had eaten with just as much voracity as he had yesterday, and she was pleased. A strong appetite meant he was truly getting better.
Truth got into her car, plugged in Jackson’s address into her GPS, and got on the road. For a small town, she still struggled to find her way around. It was easy to lose her way around in the small streets. She began following the route back to his home. She didn’t recognize the route, but she trusted it was the correct way. After ten minutes of driving, she started to question the navigation map.
As she continued to follow the directions, the area drew some familiarity, but it wasn’t toward Jackson home. When the high, iron gates came into view, Truth instantly recognized the cemetery she had visited almost a year and a half ago.
She didn’t know what possessed her to drive directly toward it but that was exactly what she did. She pulled into an empty lot and just sat there for a moment. The anniversary of his death had passed a few weeks ago and she hadn’t been here to place fresh flowers on his headstone. What kind of wife was she?
Tears welled in her eyes and this time there were too many for her to blink away. She let them slide down her cheek as despair and guilt flooded her. She would have never imagined that it was possible to love one man and desire another if she hadn’t found herself in that exact situation. There was no denying that she had loved Danny, that she had been looking forward to spending the rest of her life with him, yet there had still been that small part of her that had not been able to forget the brief passionate kiss she had shared with Jackson.
The guilt of it still ate at her, but she remembered how he had simply pulled her into a warm hug and told her not to worry about. He may not have blamed her for what happened, but she held enough for both of them.
Truth blinked away the sheen of tears that began to gather in her eyes. She hadn’t been the greatest wife that she could admit, and she couldn’t say if she had properly mourned his untimely death. She had simply left Cedar Bend and tried to forget this place.
And forget Jackson.
With a jerky breath, Truth threw the car in reverse and pulled out of the lot. She couldn’t visit him right now.
It just didn’t feel right.
Somehow she found her way back to Jackson’s home without the use of her GPS. When she pulled up, she was surprised to see another car pulled into the driveway.
Truth grabbed as many of the bags as she could carry and started toward the house. She was aware of the absence of Daisy usual bark of welcome when she entered. It was in the kitchen where she found Jackson sitting at the table, his crutches propped behind his chair. He glanced over at her.
In the kitchen with him was young woman leaning against the counter. Her pretty face stretched into a wide grin of greeting.
“You must be the help.”
Truth stiffened then slammed the grocery bags on the counter. “Actually, I’m Jackson’s sister-in-law.”
The other woman quickly lost her smile glanced nervously at Jackson. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean anything by that. Jackson said he finally had help and I assumed… Never mind.” The women pushed away from the counter. “I’m Savvy. Nice to meet you…”
“Truth,” she said, taking the other woman’s hand. Awkward silence fell between them again as Savvy glanced between her and Jackson.
“Well, I should get going,” Savvy said a bit too cheerfully. “Jackson, I’ll check on you later.”
“Sure, he said simply. It wasn’t until Savvy was half way out of the kitchen before he called out, “Thanks for the peaches.”
It was then that Truth noticed the produce lining the counter. There was an array of fresh fruits and vegetables. From tomatoes and lettuce leaved to oranges and avocado. Piled in a basket, was a healthy amount of peaches.
Truth turned to Jackson. “She brought you all of this?”
He shrugged. “Yeah. I think she has a garden or something.”
Truth glanced down at her bags and thought about the many more she still had in her car. That thought annoyed her.
“You should have told me she was coming with all this. I wouldn’t bought so much.”
Jackson shrugged again. “I didn’t know she was coming over, much less bringing all this with her.”
“Will there be any more lady friends stopping by to check in on you?” she asked tightly. “I will gladly make myself scarce.”
Jackson’s sharp gaze moved over hers searchingly before he said just as curtly, “Look if you’re pissed at me about something, just go on and say it. I don’t have time for your mind games. Or what it is you women like to play.”
Truth began to seethe. He was right. She was pissed. But she was too angry to figure out what upset her the most.
“You are something else, Jackson. You have people who obviously care about you and instead of appreciating that, you brush them off as if their time and presence mean nothing.”
He narrowed his eyes at her. “What the hell makes you think that?”
“Your help? Is that all you think of me, Jackson? Really?”
“What the hell else do you want me to call you? My sister?” He scoffed. “News flash, Truth. You’re not my goddamn sister. I never wanted you to be.”
Truth sucked in a sharp breath as the sting of his words pierced through her. What did she ever do to make him dislike her so much?
She turned away from him so he wouldn’t see the tears she was frantically blinking away. Behind her, she heard the scrap of the chair as he rose to his feet. As much as she wanted to ignore him, the medical professional in her wouldn’t allow it.
She turned and found him struggling with his crutches. Without a word, she started toward him, but he stopped her.
“I’m not hungry.”
“You should still eat some—”
“Truth, I have a fucking headache. I’m going to go lay down. Is that all right with you?”
He didn’t wait for her response. He limped out of the kitchen. As her gaze followed after him, she quietly asked herself how much more of this she could take. She’d had her fair share of difficult patients, but Jackson was proving to be the most difficult.
Fuck.
His leg hurt.
The heavy throbbing in his leg jerked him awake. Jackson gritted his teeth against the sharp pain but still it persisted, until nausea rolled in his gut. He rolled to his side, propped himself on his elbow, and turned on the light. He winced from the brightness of the light.
A quick glanced around the nightstand yielded nothing. Where the hell were his pills?
Truth.
Jackson propped himself up and the small action only intensified the pain in his leg. He drew in a sharp breath as he waited for it to reduce back down to heavy throb. At his distress, Daisy brought her large head up.
“Truth!”
Silence greeted him, and it was then Jackson realized just how dark it was outside. A quick glance at the clock said it was just as late. He had practically slept the day away.
“Truth!”
He called out her name two more times, followed by a series of loud barks from Daisy before she came rushing inside his room. She was dressed in a thin night gown and her hair was wild around her head. It was obvious she had been deeply asleep and for a moment he felt guilty as hell for waking her.
But the pain in his leg quickly forced it away.
“Jackson, what is it?”
“I need my pills,” he managed through clenched teeth. “Hurry.”
She ran to the connected bath and came back just as quickly with the prescription bottle and a cup of water.
He reached for the medicine bottle, but she pulled it out of his reach. She sat the cup down before she worked out two large pills from the bottle.
She handed him the pills, and he quickly swallowed them.
“Here.” She shoved the cup of water toward him. “Drink this too.”
He began to push the cup away, but realized his throat was dry and the pills were forcing their way down his throat.
He downed the cup with one swallow and waited but the pain was still just as intense.
“I need another one.”
Truth came back with another cup of water and Jackson shook his head.
“No. Another pill. The pain isn’t going away.”
Truth set the cup down and sat down on the bed beside him. “You need to relax, Jackson. Take your mind off it.”
He glared at her. “My leg’s fucking killing me. How the hell am I supposed to relax?”
Her eyes turned sympathetic and to his surprise she planted her palms on his bare shoulders and pushed him back on the bed.
“Lay back and shut your eyes. The pain will fade away soon.”
Jackson didn’t want to lay down. He wanted another damn pill. But if her palm on his bare skin hadn’t been distracting enough, the light strokes down his head was. Her gentle touch sent soothing currents down his body, until he no longer noticed the pain. Instead a different throbbing began to form just above his leg. There was nothing sexual about her tender touch yet his cock still began to harden.
He jerked his head away from her touch and turned slightly to his side. Away from her and her tantalizing hands.
“It’s better now. Thanks.”
“Do you need me to get you anything else?”
“Nope. Good night.”
She shut off the light on his night stand and quietly made her way out of the bedroom. He knew he wasn’t making it easy for her to care for him, but he couldn’t help it. While she was trying to be the doting sister-in-law and caring nurse, he was dreaming about her naked and straddled over him.
The last thing he wanted to do was embarrass or offend her with his hard-on, but he would be damned if he let her think he was happy letting her play the dutiful sister-in-law or the caring nurse. He didn’t want her to be anything other than his woman.
But that could never happen. Not with Danny between them. How could he ever face himself in the mirror if he took his baby brother’s wife to bed?
He was many things, but he had never taken anything away from his brother. And he wouldn’t start now, no matter how badly he wanted Truth. He couldn’t do that to Danny.