‘There... there’s nothing to take,’ she said huskily before her courage failed her completely.
‘You might think there isn’t but allow me to be the judge of that.’ He slammed his fist into his hand, anger darkening his eyes. ‘I would have sworn that there would be no repercussions for you! But that just goes to show once again that you can’t be over-confident in circumstances like these!’
‘You weren’t—over—confident, that is.’ Natalie took a deep breath and closed her eyes as she forced the confession out. ‘There’s nothing to tell you, Flynn, because nothing has happened. There’s been nobody following me. I... I made it all up!’
‘What?’ His fingers dug into her shoulders through her thin lilac cotton shirt and Natalie winced. However, he didn’t relax his grip, just shook her none too gently until her eyes flew open to meet his angry, incredulous stare.
‘I made it up. I telephoned Gabrielle and told her that tale about being followed but it wasn’t true.’
‘Why? Just what sort of a game are you playing, Natalie? You drag me back here with some cock-andbull story then calmly stand there and tell me that you made it all up!’ He bent towards her, his face taut with anger. ‘So help me you’d better have a damned good reason for doing it!’
She had! The best reason in the world, but he would need to stop shouting and answer a few questions before she ever told him what it was.
Natalie glared back at him. “Threats, O’Rourke? Perhaps the company you keep is starting to rub off?’
‘I wouldn’t get smart if I were you, honey. I would tread extremely carefully for the next few minutes, if you want my advice.’
‘And why would I want that? You don’t seem to me the best person to be offering advice, not after all the trouble you got me into!’
‘Why, you little...!’ His hands were bruising as he hauled her to him so fast that she slammed against his chest. ‘I ought to put you across my knee for that! It’s way past time that someone taught you a lesson!’
Natalie’s breath whispered from her, her eyes lifting to his. ‘Like the lessons you taught me in the desert, Flynn?’
Her hands rested quietly on his chest now, neither holding him nor repulsing him. She needed to know the truth, and needed him to tell it to her. Gabrielle had implied that he felt something for her, but had she been right?
‘Do you remember that night, Flynn?’ she asked with a slight break in her voice. ‘Recall what we shared then and the next day? Or has my memory been playing tricks?’
He stiffened beneath her touch then pushed her away and walked over to the window. He ran a hand around the back of his neck, kneading the tense muscles. ‘I remember a lot of things, Natalie. I remember very clearly your telling me that you regretted it ever happening!’
‘I remember that also, but what I want to know now is if I was right to accuse you of sleeping with me to get information about Marcus.’ She clenched her hands into fists, inwardly preparing herself for the pain if it came. ‘Tell me the truth, Flynn.’
A bitter kind of amusement crossed his face, making her heart ache. ‘I really don’t see where this is leading to. What’s the point of opening old wounds, Natalie?’ He shrugged, pushing his hands deep into his trouser pockets, his shoulders hunching slightly. ‘What happened between us is in the past. Let’s leave it there and get on with our lives. I’m sure Marcus would much prefer that. I know I would if I were in his position.’
‘And what position is that, Flynn?’
His eyes glittered dangerously even though his face remained expressionless. ‘Let’s stop playing games, Natalie. I’m far too tired and far too busy to indulge in such childishness.’ He walked away from the window, barely glancing at her as he headed for the door, but this time it was her turn to step in his way.
‘I agree. The time for play-acting is over. It’s time to tell the truth once and for all. I’ll go first, shall I?’ She watched him closely, seeing how his face closed up. It took all her courage to carry on, that plus a sense of desperation. All she would get was this one chance to make him understand how important it was that neither of them should lie for whatever reason!
‘I am not in love with Marcus. I thought I was for a long time but I realised a while ago that I had been mistaken.’
He sighed heavily. ‘Look, Natalie, your feelings, or lack of them, for Marcus Cole are none of my concern.’
It hurt to hear him say that in such an indifferent tone but she wouldn’t give up, not yet, not until he had told her the truth, no matter what it was. ‘Is that right? So you really don’t care one way or the other, Flynn?’
Something flashed across his face. ‘What do you want me to say, Natalie? You made it plain how you felt about me and the way I used you.’
He laid a deliberate emphasis on the last words and she winced. ‘Yes. I was bitterly hurt. Finding out that you had deliberately become involved in my life so that you could find out about Marcus came as a shock. It knocked me sideways if you want the truth. But I want you to answer one question: did you sleep with me as a way to get that information?’
‘There’s really no point in this!’
‘Then I can only take that to mean yes.’ She turned away but not fast enough to hide the agony in her eyes from him.
‘Natalie, I...’ He reached out and caught her, turning her round to face him, then groaned deeply. ‘No! How could you imagine that after what we shared?’ His hands gentled on her. ‘I wanted you for no other reason than making love to you was the single most important thing in the world right then. It had nothing to do with Marcus or what I was trying to find out. Nothing to do with anything but the aching need I had to hold you and make you mine!’
The sincerity in his voice couldn’t be doubted. Natalie felt warmth run through her, erasing days upon days of numbing cold. She smiled up at him through glistening eyes, loving him at that moment more than ever. ‘You don’t know how I’ve prayed that that would be your answer, Flynn,’ she whispered brokenly. ‘I was so hurt when I overheard you and Doyle talking that I closed my mind to what you were trying to tell me. I was afraid that it would be more lies.’
‘I’ve never deliberately lied to you, Natalie. Perhaps I wasn’t totally honest about what I was trying to do but when it all began I had no idea of the implications.’ He smiled thinly. ‘It seems that even the best-laid plans can go wrong.’
‘Perhaps not completely wrong.’ She drew a quick little breath. ‘You see, Flynn, I’ve fallen in love with you.’
The silence seemed to echo in the room then Flynn gave a harsh, incredulous laugh. ‘What is this, Natalie? Another one of your little games? You seem to be full of them today!’
His tone stung but she faced him squarely. ‘I’ve already told you I’m not playing games any more. I love you, Flynn.’
His eyes were glacial, burning with an icy flame which chilled her. ‘You really expect me to believe that? That you’ve suddenly discovered that you don’t love Marcus but met?’
‘Yes, that’s exactly what I want you to believe. But perhaps it is difficult to take it in.’ She laughed huskily. ‘I’ve had a while to get used to the idea, you see. Still, don’t they say that sometimes actions speak much louder than any amount of words?’ .
Her heart was thundering, her whole body tense with fear. What if she had made a mistake and, despite what he had just said, Flynn felt nothing for her? He’d said that he had wanted her but... Before her courage deserted her completely she reached out and ran her hands up his chest to loop them around his neck while she drew his head down.
‘In God’s name, Natalie...!’
Her mouth drank in the heated words, the hard resistance of his lips mirrored by the tension in his body. Deliberately she moved closer and let her body brush lightly against his; she felt the way his hands came up to grip her waist and start to move her away from him but she refused to go. Her tongue traced the hard, unyielding outline of his mouth in a slow caress and she felt the shudde
r which ran through him with a flare of elation. Despite the impression he was trying to give he wasn’t totally unmoved by the kiss!
Her fingers slid into the thick hair at his nape as she drew his head down further and deepened the kiss, her tongue pushing its way past the barrier of his hard lips to incite his to join it in a heady, sensual rhythm, yet still Flynn made no attempt to respond and the elation faded. Had she really misjudged the situation so badly? Didn’t he care?
Tears slid down her cheeks and across their mouths and she heard Flynn utter a low exclamation which seemed to be torn from him. His hands lifted to cup her face while he kissed her back with a heat and urgency which ran in shock waves through her body. Now he was the instigator, his mouth making its urgent, hungry demands as he pushed her on and on towards a response which left her weak with longing so that she could only cling to him.
He drew back at last, eyes burning with a passion he made no attempt to hide as he trailed kisses over her eyelids, her cheeks, drying her tears with his ardour.
‘I love you, Flynn,’ she whispered urgently while she pressed frantic, imploring kisses along his jaw until he drew away with a harsh sigh.
‘How do you know?’
‘What do you mean?’ She pulled back, confused by the question, and saw him smile with a bitter irony.
‘You’ve already admitted that you thought you were in love with Marcus for a long time, so how can you be sure that’s changed, that what you feel for me isn’t just the result of this passion we arouse in one another?’
‘No! I knew I was in love with you that first time, that night in the desert. I know how I feel, Flynn, and it’s completely different from how I ever felt about Marcus!’
He set her away from him, turning his back on her as he walked over to the window again. Natalie wanted to run to him and make him believe her but when she took a step towards him he stopped her. ‘No. That isn’t the way, Natalie. Passion cannot be allowed to dictate this time!’
Her heart seemed to freeze. ‘Meaning that’s all you feel for me?’
He swung round, big and arrogant as he glared at her. ‘Meaning that passion is a powerful emotion! It can be devastating suddenly to discover just how powerful. As you did when we made love, Natalie.’
Colour flooded her pale face but he was relentless as he came across to her and made her look at him. ‘You were a virgin until that night. You’d had little or no experience.’ He laughed harshly. ‘I just wonder if the guilt you felt afterwards isn’t still very much alive, and if convincing yourself that you’re in love with me isn’t a means of appeasing it?’
‘No!’ She tore herself away from him, eyes blazing with hurt. ‘I don’t feel at all guilty about loving you, O’Rourke! Oddly enough I never did. Oh, I might think I’m totally crazy, a complete fool, might feel a lot of things, but not guilty!’
‘How can you be so sure? Have you seen Marcus since you got back?’
His tone was so reasonable; he might have been discussing anything, not the fact that she had just declared her love for him! Yet Natalie strove to match his mood, wondering if it would help convince him that she knew her own mind. ‘No. I tried phoning his flat, to speak to you actually, but he wasn’t there.’
‘I finally tracked him down a few days ago.’
‘And did you tell him what’s been going on and that you’ve been investigating him?’
‘Yes. Now that he’s been eliminated as the main suspect, I needed his help to get to the bottom of things.’
‘Oh, I’m sure he was pleased to hear that he’d been under suspicion!’
‘Marcus is a realist. He understood only too well my reasons. He would have done the same thing himself if our positions had been reversed.’
‘And did you tell him about us?’
‘I told him that I had gone to Egypt with you and why, and what happened about you being kidnapped.’ He shrugged. ‘As for the rest, I left that up to you to tell him or not as you chose.’
He made it sound of such little consequence to him that Natalie’s heart ached afresh. ‘I see. Then maybe I should go to see Marcus myself?’
‘That’s up to you but perhaps it would help you get everything into perspective.’
‘So that’s your advice, is it, Flynn? Go and see Marcus and test out these feelings I have, see if they’re real or merely a figment of my guilty conscience?’
His eyes glittered dangerously before he carefully blanked all expression from his face. ‘That seems to be the sensible thing to do.’
He sounded almost indifferent to the outcome but Natalie had seen that betraying glint in his eyes that he hadn’t been quick enough to hide and wasn’t fooled. ‘And what if I discover that it has nothing to do with imagination, that what I feel for you, Flynn, is real? What happens then?’
Every bone in his face seemed to contract yet when he stretched his hand out and touched her cheek with the very tips of his fingers it was the lightest, tenderest of caresses. ‘Then, Natalie, you and I need to talk!’
As a declaration it barely rated a mention but it was enough to make hope surge to life inside her and flow sweetly through her veins. She smiled, letting him see everything she felt for him, and heard the soft indrawn breath he took with a feeling of triumph. Whatever impression Flynn had tried to give, this meant more to him than he was confessing!
‘Where will you be? How can I contact you?’ she asked quietly.
‘Doyle will know. Just get a message through to him and he’ll pass it on.’ He let his hand drop and walked to the door, his knuckles showing white through the tanned skin as he gripped the handle. ‘If I don’t hear from you then I shall understand.’
It was the hardest thing in the world to let him walk out of the flat. Natalie’s heart was breaking but she didn’t attempt to call him back and make him stay. Flynn was determined that she shouldn’t make a mistake so she would do as he wanted, but it didn’t stop her from feeling scared. What if Flynn was simply trying to find a way out because what she’d told him had been something he hadn’t wanted to hear? She closed her mind to that painful thought, clinging on to the memory of how he had touched her just now, so gently, so tenderly, to keep hope alive. She loved him and no matter what it took she was going to convince him of that most important fact!
Where was Marcus?
Natalie paced the floor, wondering where else she could try. Flynn had said that he’d spoken to him but so far she’d had no luck tracking him down. He seemed to have disappeared again and she was getting desperate as the days slipped past.
She had tried his sister, Becky, but she’d had no idea where he’d gone. Now that Becky was married Natalie didn’t see so much of her and she wondered if it was that which had seemed to set a certain constraint on their conversation, most noticeably when she’d asked after Becky’s husband, Rob. Several times over the past two years Natalie had wondered just how successful her friend’s marriage was, but she had too many other things on her mind right now to dwell on it.
Suddenly overcome by a need to do something positive, she picked up her bag and in a very short time was ringing Marcus’s doorbell. It would probably be a wasted journey, of course, but she had to... The sight of Marcus at the door left her speechless.
‘Natalie? Is anything wrong? Here, come inside.’
He led her into the sitting-room, urging her into a chair as she continued to stare dumbly at him before finally finding her voice. ‘Where have you been, Marcus?’ she demanded hoarsely. ‘I’ve been trying to get hold of you for days!’
He sat down, running a hand wearily over his face. He looked desperately tired, deep lines etched into his face, his dark grey eyes shadowed, and Natalie felt a pang of concern.
‘Are you all right?’
‘Yes. I’m sorry if you’ve been worried but there was something I had to attend to. It’s been taking up most of my time recently. But what was so urgent that you’ve been trying to get hold of me?’ He sat up, studying her intently. ‘It
hasn’t anything to do with O’Rourke and that mess he got you into? I tore him off a strip when I found out that he’d involved you. He swore there would be no future repercussions but knowing the kind of people he’s been dealing with one can’t be certain!’
It had everything to do with Flynn, but not how Marcus imagined! Natalie glanced down, wondering what he would say if she told him the reason why she was here. Marcus had been an important part of her life for so long now, lending it the stability she’d needed so desperately from the time her parents had died. He had been her rock, always there to help when she’d needed it, and he would always be dear to her, but what she felt for him bore no resemblance to what she felt for Flynn!
‘No, that’s all been sorted out, hopefully, although I have to confess that I’m still not certain what’s been going on.’
‘I imagine O’Rourke deemed it safer not to tell you too much. It’s been a bad business, Natalie, and from what he’s told me it still isn’t over. But if anyone can get to the bottom of it then O’Rourke can.’ He sighed. ‘I’m only sorry I wasn’t around to give him the assistance he needed, although in the circumstances perhaps that wasn’t what he wanted!’ He added wryly, ‘But I’ve been caught up with problems of my own. In fact I’ll be going away again in a few days’ time. If you need me for anything then leave a message with my office, Natalie. I’ll make sure I get back to you as soon as I can.’
Natalie smiled. ‘You mustn’t worry about me, Marcus.’
He returned her smile, the strain easing from his face for a moment. ‘I can’t help it, Natalie. We’ve known each other a long time now and you’re very dear to me.’
Tears stung her eyes at the admission and she leant forward and took his hand, holding it between both of hers. ‘As you are to me,’ she said softly. ‘You’ve always been there for me, Marcus, whenever I’ve needed someone to lean on. Your friendship has meant a lot to me and I want you to know that.’
He turned his hand over, capturing hers and holding it while he stared quietly into her eyes. ‘I’m glad, but why do I get the feeling you’re trying to tell me something, Natalie?’ He laughed gently when her colour rose. ‘I know you too well, don’t I?’
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