“Matthias, are you all right? You don’t look like you feel good.” Son of a bitch! These shrimp were fucking hot. How had she missed that? She’d ordered that? She never did spicy.
“Oh, Christ, these things are spicy! I’m sorry. I can’t eat this.”
Matthias nodded, still looking…weird. Then again, she honestly didn’t have a lot of experience with him outside of the office. So he boinked her silly and dragged her from Florida to Yellowstone and back—
Okay, that wasn’t fair. “I’m sorry I’m snarky. I just want to get home.”
He nodded. “You’re all right?”
“Oh yeah, I’m fine. But you look like you’ve seen a ghost.”
* * * *
Her taillights disappeared ahead of him. They’d prearranged their next gas stop and she promised to wait. Matthias called Tim Robertson.
“Tim, can I ask you an odd question?”
“Sure.”
“Does Taz eat spicy food?”
Tim laughed. “My Taz? If we were scared of garlic, then she’d be petrified of pepper. The girl won’t touch a pepper mill if you paid her. I always had to make chili in batches, hers before I added spices, then the rest. She likes horseradish though, and garlic. Onions, sweet peppers. Fresh wasabi and ginger. Spicy food? She won’t touch it. Never has. I could get her to happily eat liver, but she’ll run from a peppercorn steak. Why?”
“Oh, nothing. We’re about to make a dinner stop and I realized there are things I don’t know.” But he’d seen her down two of the shrimp—
Just like Rafe.
—without batting an eye.
“Well, that’s good. Where?”
“Ruby Tuesday.” Matthias knew he wouldn’t like going down this path but couldn’t stop himself.
“Oh, she loves the cheddar fries. Can’t get enough.”
“What about the Thai Phoon shrimp?”
That was definitely a laugh. Or a snort. “Not a chance, not with the sauce they use. Just the smell makes her eyes water. I don’t find them particularly spicy, but to her they might as well be Scotch bonnet peppers.”
“Okay, thanks.” Matthias ended the call, replaying the meal in his mind. He didn’t think the shrimp were overly spicy, but compared to him, Rafe had a cast-iron stomach. “Too hot” wasn’t in Rafe’s vocabulary, whether it described food, women, or cars.
If he thought about it too long, it might drive him nuts. He decided to file it away for future reference.
* * * *
Taz waited for Matthias at the prearranged exit. He fueled up the Hummer, and she hugged him.
“Can we stop for the night?” she asked. “I know we’re only a couple hours away, but I’m wiped.”
“Absolutely.”
They checked into the best-looking of the three hotels at that exit. Matthias thought Taz would want to go to bed, but after he exited the bathroom, he found her getting dressed. The room seemed filled with a strange energy.
“Let’s go,” she said. “That bar has karaoke.” She threw his shirt at him.
“I didn’t know you like to do that,” he said. Then he realized there were a lot of things he didn’t know about her. Maybe she did enjoy it.
She started out the door for the bar across the parking lot.
“Taz, wait.” He caught up with her, buttoning his shirt. “Shouldn’t we get some rest?”
“Oh, quit being so boring, Matts,” she said, walking in without him.
“‘Matts?’”
He followed her and found she’d already staked out a table close to the stage. There were maybe two dozen patrons in the bar. She grabbed a playbook and squealed. “Oh! This one!” Before Matthias could stop her, she was over by the DJ, filling out a slip.
“You gonna sing with me?” she asked upon her return.
“Why?”
“It’s a duet. I’ll need backup.”
“You’ve heard me sing, Taz. I’m not—”
“Great!” She flagged down a waitress and ordered a drink. “You getting anything, Matts?”
He shook his head. This was beyond strange. “Taz, are you feeling all right?”
She grinned and nodded. “You betcha’!” All the while rubbing the ring.
He supposed he should be grateful she was feeling better, but something odd was going on. He reached out with his mind and bumped against her thick mental barrier.
She sensed his probe and grinned. “All these drunks. Sorry, Matts, just don’t want to hear them, ya know?” Then she winked.
God, there was something familiar about that.
Before Matthias could question Taz, the DJ announced her song. She dragged Matthias on stage with her.
The DJ handed them two mics, and the song started. He recognized it immediately, it was one of Rafael’s favorites. Meat Loaf’s “Paradise by the Dashboard Light.” Usually Rafe charmed a lovely young thing into singing with him and then took her to bed. He didn’t care if they could sing. He picked his karaoke partners based on their physical assets.
Taz snapped with the beat and started singing, perhaps sensing Matthias wasn’t ready. He finally picked up on the second verse and they sang it more as a duet until the bridge. Then she belted out the woman’s part, her eyes burning into his, pulling him in.
Matthias didn’t know how he made it through the rest of the song. She sounded good, and the small audience, a little larger than it was when they first started, went wild at the end when she grabbed him and kissed him, stunning him with her passion and ferocity.
The waitress brought her drink, double bourbon. Taz smiled and downed it in a couple of gulps.
Holy hell, Taz never drank like that.
Did she? He thought about it. To be honest, he didn’t know. He’d have to call Tim again, but would he even know?
But…
Rafe did. Used to.
Rafe had the constitution of an experienced Irish drunk. One or two shots didn’t even give him a buzz. Combined with vampire genetics, the effect was even more dramatic. Matthias had watched him drink an entire bottle of bourbon and be white-line-walking sober within twenty minutes.
Matthias paid the tab while Taz sang a number by Pink. A sad ballad of lost love that never was.
A shiver crawled up his spine and he wondered, yet again, what was going on.
Three drinks later, Taz was laughing and leading him out of the bar, stopping in the middle of the parking lot to throw her arms up in the air and spin around, whooping with joy.
He managed to lead her back to the room. “What was that for?”
She grinned. “Just happy to be alive, Matty-boy!”
Then she collapsed.
Alarmed, Matthias dropped their room key and caught her. Fortunately he’d already unlocked the door and managed to put his foot against it and kick it open, gently laying her on the bed. He grabbed the key from where it landed and went back to Taz, grabbing her hands.
“Taz, Taz! Wake up!”
Her mental barrier was mostly down, and she felt confused, dazed. Not drunk, but…like waking from a long, deep sleep.
“Taz!” He was about to phone Tim when she finally moaned and put a hand to her head.
“I’m—what? What’s wrong?” She opened her eyes. “Matthias, what’s the matter?”
“Are you all right? You passed out.”
“I—” She tried to sit up and groaned, lay back down again. “What happened? Why does it taste like I’ve been drinking?”
“You don’t remember?”
She looked at him, her eyes wide. “What happened?”
“We just got back from karaoke. You had three double bourbons. Straight.”
“I what? I don’t drink bourbon.”
“You did just now.”
She sat up with his help. “Matthias, this isn’t funny.”
“Do I look like I’m laughing?”
“Karaoke? I don’t do karaoke. I’ve never done karaoke.”
“Well, you sure wowed the crowd. Yo
u were fantastic.”
She looked at him like he was crazy. “What the hell is going on?”
He shook his head. “I don’t know. I wish I did.”
Chapter Eight
The next morning, Taz awoke before Matthias. The nasty taste in her mouth brought back everything that happened, including the karaoke. Why did she do that?
It was like someone took over her body, and she sat back and watched from the bleachers. She hadn’t even minded. It was…
Weird.
Crazy?
Scary.
This was way more than hot, sexy dreams and a phantom voice.
She watched Matthias and suddenly knew what she had to do. She was out of control again, or rapidly heading in that direction, and she needed to decompress before she lost it like she did in Yellowstone. She’d spent her entire life in complete control and refused to let it slip through her fingers again. It didn’t matter what the guys told her or how they blamed her loss of control on the sudden awakening of her powers. The Ice Queen would not melt down again.
Never again.
She needed to be alone. Her fugue, if you could call it that, was more proof she needed to get whatever this was out of her system. This was too much, too soon. She was used to being by herself, not as half a couple. She loved Matthias, but this was something he’d have to give her.
Space.
She risked touching Matthias’ mind and saw he was still deeply asleep. She showered, dressed, and packed her things. Then she wrote him a note and sat in front of the TV.
When he awoke he smiled. “Ready to go?” he asked.
She nodded. “I didn’t want to keep you waiting.” She felt guilty about withholding her thoughts from him but knew this is what she had to do.
He got up and kissed her, frowning slightly but not pushing. She knew he sensed her mental barrier.
“Are you all right, Taz?”
She forced a smile. “I’m okay.”
“Let me get a shower and we’ll go eat.”
She waited until the water was running and she knew he was under the spray. She left the note on the dresser, under his keys where he’d find it. Then she grabbed her bag, purse, and Rafael’s laptop case and quietly let herself out.
Stopping at a bank on the other side of the interstate, Taz made the maximum withdrawal from her checking account at an ATM, then took a cash advance from one of her personal credit cards. She needed to get away, untraceable for now. They would track her credit cards.
Before she headed north on I-75, Taz switched off her BlackBerry. She needed to disable the GPS tracking feature. She also had to put some immediate distance between her and Matthias so he couldn’t sense the direction she was heading, and she didn’t have time to figure out the phone settings.
She knew where she wanted to go. Once there, she’d tell him.
* * * *
At first, Matthias thought Taz went to load her luggage in the car or get them a table at breakfast.
Then he spotted her note.
Matthias, I love you. With all my heart. But I need a few days alone. I feel like I’m crawling out of my skin. Last night scared me, proved I need time so I don’t explode like I did in Yellowstone. Please don’t worry—I will be careful. And please don’t try to find me. I’ll stay safe, and I’ll let you know where I am when I’m ready to come home in a few days, I promise.
Love, Taz.
His knees weakened as he sat heavily on the bed. No wonder she’d blocked him.
Even though he knew she wouldn’t answer, he tried to call. Straight to voice mail. He hung up without leaving a message, knowing she’d turned her phone off so it couldn’t be tracked.
He dressed, got in the Hummer, and circled the area trying to locate her, trying to sense her.
Nothing.
He finally called Tim and told him. Tim met him with stony silence on the other end.
“She took off?” Tim finally asked. “How could you let her do that, Matthias? I trusted you to take care of her!”
“She’s not a prisoner. I didn’t know she would run. Apparently she was very determined.”
“What happened?”
Matthias explained the evening’s events. Tim sighed. “Stress. It must be. She’s trying to deal with what happened.”
“I don’t know what to do.”
“Come home, Matthias. We’ll track her credit cards, find out where she’s going.”
“She’ll be too smart for that.”
“Probably, but we’ll still try.”
* * * *
Matthias didn’t want to make this call, but knew Bartholomew would be calling him if he didn’t check in.
“How is she, Matthias?”
“She’s fine.”
Bartholomew hesitated. “What’s going on?”
“Nothing.” Matthias tried to keep the stress out of his voice and knew he failed miserably.
“Is she with you? I’d like to talk to her, introduce myself.”
“No, she’s not.”
“Well, where is she? Let me have her number.”
“I don’t know where she is right now.”
He could practically hear Bartholomew’s haughty smirk. “Why don’t you know?”
“She’s very upset right now. She’s still dealing with everything that happened. Rafael just died, if you don’t remember.”
“You must control her, Matthias. People’s lives may be at stake. Perhaps you can embrace a romantic vision of her, but if she harms anyone—”
Matthias hung up on him. The last thing he needed was to get into a screaming match with the head of the Tribunal and call him an asshole.
* * * *
Taz wore Rafael’s sunglasses and didn’t stop driving until she needed gas. She filled, paying cash, and got back on the road.
The sign for the exit to Rafe’s condo appeared, and she instinctively took it. She had a moment of hesitation at the entry gate, not sure of the code. After a whispered inspiration she punched in a four digit number.
The gate opened.
His garage door opener was clipped to the passenger visor. Taz pulled into the garage and shut the door behind her. She didn’t plan on being here too long, but she wanted a little more time in his home. Reaching out, carefully, she didn’t sense Matthias anywhere. She would have a little warning if he tried to double back.
She walked into Rafe’s bedroom and sat on the bed, looking around. The place wasn’t sparse, but he obviously wasn’t one to collect things. She walked to the closet, turned on the light, and sorted through his clothes. Good quality, nice taste, but nothing fancy or terribly expensive. A plastic dry-cleaning bag hanging in one corner held a tux.
That made her smile. She bet he looked good in it the few times he wore it.
Hung in neat order were several shirts similar to the one he wore in Yellowstone, long-sleeved, button-up cotton chambrays in different colors. Several traditional light blue, others in conservative colors.
She picked one like the one he’d worn that day and slipped it off the hanger. Closing her eyes, she brought it to her face. It smelled like laundry detergent, not him.
Then again, it was one of the trace scents comprising her memories of who he was.
A calm peace settled over her. Now she knew what to do. She laid the shirt on his bed and undressed, going into the bathroom and running the shower. Stepping in, Taz wet her hair, washed with Rafael’s shampoo, used his soap, dried with the towel she knew had to be his hanging on the bar along the wall, and used his deodorant. Naked, except for the towel around her wet hair, she walked into the bedroom and slipped on his shirt, not buttoning it, pulled down the covers—
Right side.
The voice. But that was correct, wasn’t it? He slept on the right side of the bed.
She grabbed his pillow and pressed it to her face. There he was in her mind, in full color. She sobbed, lying on her side with his scent bringing him into clear focus. She didn’t want to cry anymore
, but it was like he was right there with her.
“It’s okay.”
And his voice. Taz instinctively knew it had to be stress, or guilt, or a hyperactive imagination, but he was there. She pictured his blue eyes, and they looked just like Matthias’, his laugh, his smile…
She closed her eyes and trembled, wanting him there. She wore her guilt like a lead cloak, no escaping it. She would give up anything, even her own life, to have him back.
“No, Taz.”
She shuddered. She loved Matthias, but it was like she lost a soul mate when Rafe died.
“Sleep, Taz. Please.”
* * * *
She hadn’t revisited Rafe’s room in her mind, the one she created for him during the training exercises. She feared the sight of the emptiness would overwhelm her. In this dream, she was still curled up on his bed at the condo.
Rafe walked through the bedroom door. He lay down next to her, comforting, wrapping his body and arms around her.
“I love you, Taz baby.”
It felt so real. He felt real.
He held her, curled protectively around her. She felt his love and warmth and again, that connection to him she couldn’t comprehend. Why did she feel tied to Rafe in a way she didn’t with Matthias? It would have been sweet agony with him alive, but she would take that over this pain any day.
She rolled over to face him and kissed him, feeling him stiffen against her bare leg. His blue eyes bored into hers, and Taz knew if she could spend her life asleep and dreaming of him, she would.
He smiled, shaking his head. “No, sweetie. You have a life to live.”
“Love me, Rafe.” She kissed him, letting herself go, enjoying the feel of his arms and lips and hands. In this dream, he was suddenly naked, and without bothering to remove her shirt he slipped his cock inside her and made slow, sweet love to her.
It felt so real. Her fingers tangled in his hair, pulling his lips against her throat and wishing he could bite her. She knew that couldn’t happen, not really. His hand slipped between their bodies to find her clit. As they kissed, his skilled fingers slowly stroked her, playing with her clit even as he continued to fuck her. When he brought her over she wrapped her legs tightly around him as he thrust, his own orgasm not far behind.
Dalton, Tymber - Brimstone Blues [Brimstone Vampires 2] (Siren Publishing Classic) Page 7