by A. M. Wilson
Feet crunch along the gravel as he makes his way to the rear where I lie helplessly. As he wrenches the trunk open, sunlight blinds me. He gazes down at me for a moment, studying me, watching me. Toying with me as a cat toys with a mouse. Batting his paws, hoping for me to squirm. I won’t give him the satisfaction.
“Hello, Lena, honey,” he says, his green eyes looking delighted. He has me right where he wants me I’m sure.
I want to vomit at the revolting name he uses. What once made me feel special, now only fills me with disgust. Breathe, I remind myself. He can’t win. But I’m scared to death, knowing I am entirely powerless in this moment. I have to find a way to get out of these binds.
He reaches down into the trunk where I lay helpless, running one grimy finger along my cheek, from brow to chin, across my lips. I try, and fail, to suppress a shudder. He smirks at my reaction. Grasping my torso, he lifts me bodily out of the trunk, hoists me over his shoulder, and grabs my purse before slamming the compartment behind me.
Having removed his blindfold in the trunk, I see we are in a heavily wooded forest, the trees bright and alive with lush, leafy coverage. It smells like damp twigs and fresh rain. The sun is hot as it beats down on my back as Travis carries me to…somewhere. I haven’t quite figured that out yet since I can’t see in front of him.
Travis steps up three rickety wooden stairs of the porch to some sort of cabin or shack out here in the woods, and I begin to thrash wildly. Once he gets me inside, I fear it will be even harder for me to escape, so I twist and writhe my torso, struggling against the hold he has on me. I smash my elbow into the back of his head, and Travis grunts in pain.
“Fucking bitch!” he shouts before throwing me over his shoulder headfirst onto the ground. My bound hands don’t provide much of a cushion, and my body crumples on impact. My neck screams in agony from the force of the forest floor, and I grit my teeth as to not give him the satisfaction of hearing me in pain. Instead, I remain still.
“Try that again,” he grits through clenched teeth. “I dare you.” He hoists me up on his shoulder once more. This time, I hang limply.
The creak of old hinges sound and the wood groans as he pulls open a heavy door. Stepping through the entryway, I can see we are indeed in some type of shack, maybe used for hunting. It’s too desolate for someone to live here. He thrusts his black booted foot back, kicking the door closed. He carries me through one room, a doorway, and tosses me down onto a damp mattress on the floor of a room. It smells strongly of mildew. Only one window is in the room, covered by a thick dirty board and a large spider web hanging from the ceiling above it.
I look back over at Travis to see him dragging a heavy chain up from underneath the mattress. He cuts the rope around my feet with one swift tug of a knife, and wraps the chain tightly around my left foot. Panic seizes me and I kick my legs, trying to free myself from his shackles. My flailing feet catch him on his left brow, breaking open the skin above his eye. A small trickle of blood leaks down his face, leaving a nasty path of rust down his cheek. He smears it away with the back of his hand, glancing at the smudge before rearing back and backhanding me full force across the face. My head snaps to the side, and I fall back to the mattress, feeling slightly stunned.
“Fucking bitch, hold still!” he growls, wrapping the chain tightly around my left ankle once more.
By the time the dizziness passes enough to right myself, he has the chain locked.
“I was going to be nice and untie your hands once I was done with your legs, but not anymore,” he says, sniffing some snot from his throat and spitting it towards the corner of the room. “You’ll stay here until I’m ready for you.”
With that, he leaves the room, shutting the door behind him. I hear the scrape of a lock from the other side before the sound of his footsteps disappear.
I swallow down the panic rising in my throat. So far, everything is fine. Sure, I’m chained to this disgusting, stained mattress in a tiny rotting shack out in the middle of fucking nowhere, but let’s consider the facts.
The alternative is dead.
He must want to keep me around, for a little while at least. He’s given me a bed, sort of, when he could have left me in the trunk. He mentioned ‘being nice,’ although I apparently fucked that up, but if he wants to be nice that means he’s not going to kill me right away.
I need to buy time. Whenever he decides to come back, I need to talk to him. I need to get him to talk to me. The longer he waits to do whatever he’s planning on doing, the longer I have for the police to find me. My phone is still on in my purse, and he bought that inside with us. If it’s not dead, hopefully they’ll be able to follow it right here.
As revolting as it is, I lay on that dirty old mattress and stare at the ceiling. Patiently waiting, hoping I can somehow convince him to let me go. My mind starts wandering the longer I wait.
Is this where he brought Katie before she died? Did she die here? I no longer have any lingering doubt that he was involved with her disappearance. Was she chained up in this room like I am, waiting for him to return to do whatever his purpose was for bringing her here? Am I about to face the same fate? Did he practice on her first?
Not wanting to face those questions any longer, I stop fighting myself and drift off into a fitful, restless sleep.
Darkness envelops the room as I wake up gasping and sweating from a particularly dreadful nightmare. I was running. Running as if my life depended on it. I kept looking over my shoulder as I navigated through a dark forest, leaping over boulders and downed trees, but I couldn’t see what was chasing me. A cabin up sat up ahead, but the closer I got the more rundown and decrepit it looked. I changed my path, avoiding the crumbling structure only to run headlong into Travis, a wicked gleam in his piercing green eyes.
“Wait! Come to me! I’ll save you!” he’d called, but something in my gut told me he was bad.
Instead, I’d halted in my steps, turning around towards whatever it was I was running from, when I ran straight into Elias, equally out of breath as myself.
“Elias? What are you doing here?” I had asked him, confused as to why he was chasing me through the woods.
“Come with me. Don’t run,” he said, reaching out his hand for me.
“Why were you chasing me? I’m afraid Elias,” I replied. Still so confused. I was running from Elias, who drove me straight into Travis, which caused me to turn around and run back into Elias like a rabbit cornered by hungry wolves. Is this a game? A trap?
“Come to me.” He said again, right before I had woken up.
What was that about? I listen hard, trying to calm my noisy breathing and racing heart. There isn’t any sound coming from the rest of the shack. The only sound I hear is the faint pitter-patter of rain against the walls, a distant rumbling of thunder. I think I’m alone.
There isn’t a way for me to tell what time it is, but I am guessing sometime at night. I’ve been missing for hours already. As much as I want to remain strong, hopelessness creeps in. Will I ever be found?
I’m hungry.
I’m cold.
I need to use a bathroom.
There is a faint light in the room again, but still no sound.
Where is Travis?
Did he dump me here to die alone, hungry and cold? Will he be back to finish me off? Will he come back to let me go, his purpose only to frighten me?
Wiggling my hands against each other, the course rope bites unforgivingly into my sensitive skin. When did he learn to tie rope so tightly?
Staring at the ceiling, I begin counting the knots in the wood to pass the time until Travis returns.
One…Two…Three…
Surely, he’ll return. There was a reason for bringing me out here.
Four…Five…Six…Seven…
I wonder what Elias is doing right now. I should have never left. I should have waited until he could get back to explain, but I had to let my emotions take me for a ride.
I hope that the polic
e came to him looking for any information. I hope he knows I’m not mad at him. My heart breaks when I think about our last conversation. I love him so much more than I ever thought possible. He’s shown me a love I never felt deserving of before. For some unfathomable reason, he’s given his heart to me, and I only hope I’ll have the chance to repay his love back to him when this is over.
Eight…Nine…
I don’t want to think anymore. Emotion squeezes my chest, making it hard to breathe. Tears stream silently down my cheeks. As I close my eyes once more, I think, Oh God, let me be found…alive.
When I wake again, time has completely escaped me. It could be hours later, it could be a day. The only thing for certain is the room is brighter, meaning it’s daytime. My ears strain to hear any sound, any warning I’m not alone.
Nothing. I hear nothing.
Even though I know it’s useless, I find myself tugging at my restraints once again. After a few minutes of no progress, I’m studying the ring of dried blood dotting my wrists when a door slams shut.
He’s back.
Oh God, he’s back.
After all that time wondering where he was and wishing he’d come back, now I want to be alone again. Closing my eyes, I focus all of my attention on my ears. His heavy boots drag against the wood floor as he nears the room I’m captive in. The lock scrapes before he creaks the door open slowly. My chest heaves, trying to take a lifetime of breaths in one minute. It’s so hard to stay calm when I don’t know what he’s about to do.
Travis enters the room looking dirty and disheveled. Wherever he has been, it didn’t include a shower or a change of clothing. He brings a small bowl of water, which he sets on the floor next to me. He tosses a piece of bread next to it.
Crossing the room, he places an empty bucket in the corner next to the mattress. He’s not looking at me as he moves about; he looks focused, concentrated on something. This is ridiculous. As afraid as I am, I can’t sit here and wait to die.
“What are you doing, Travis?” Much to my pleasure, my voice rings out strong and clear.
“Shut up. I didn’t say you could talk,” he replies, his voice full of some emotion. Anger maybe?
“Tell me what you want with me.”
Before I can blink, he lunges at me. He climbs on top of my body, pinning me beneath him to the filthy mattress. He pulls my arms above my head, holding them tightly between his dirty hands. Dropping his face, he brings it within inches of my own, staring at me with his cold, hard eyes. Dead eyes. They’re lifeless. Looking into them makes me sick.
“I haven’t decided what I’m going to do to you yet, bitch. Right now, you’re staying chained to this fucking bed. I haven’t decided if I’m going to fuck you first, get my fill of you, or just kill you. First, you ruined my fucking life. Then you wouldn’t listen when I told you to stay away from that dirt bag. If I can’t have you, nobody can.”
My voice chokes in my throat. We finally start to get down to why I’m here, and it’s as awful as I feared. What really has me shaking beneath him is the threat of him…fucking me. That thought has the bile rising in my throat. I can’t…won’t go through something like that. I refuse.
Any protest, any hope of talking him out of this, dies on my lips. Antagonizing him is not worth it. If he’s going to kill me, I can only pray he does it quickly and doesn’t defile and torture me first.
“Here’s some water and something to eat. You can use that bucket to piss. I’ll be back, Lena,” he sneers. He turns and leaves the room, once again locking the door behind him.
CHAPTER TWENTY ONE
It’s sometime later when I wake up again. Another day maybe? Have I been here one day or two? Maybe three? I can’t remember. Hunger pangs ring out in my stomach, making me curl into a ball from the pain. My eyelids are heavy; my mouth is dry. Travis hasn’t been back since he brought me that small piece of bread and water. I hope he brings me something else to eat. I want to scream at him; I can hear him out there.
He’s pacing, back and forth, back and forth. Stop. Start pacing again.
I’m afraid of what he’ll do if I make too much noise.
A small sliver of sunshine makes its way through a crack in the plywood covering the window, lighting up my face. It’s a small sliver, but I imagine I can feel it’s warmth on my body. I watch the dust motes floating through the light, imagining I’m one of those specks of dust floating freely through the air. Will I ever be free again?
The pacing stops. Heavy boots start up again coming for my door. I hear the familiar scrape of the key in the lock before he swings the door open once again.
“Why do you lock me in?” I ask. “It’s not like I can go anywhere while I’m chained to the bed.” I don’t know why I question him. There’s nothing better to do I guess. I’m already starving to death; maybe he’ll be kind and speed up the process.
To my absolute surprise, his eyes slightly soften.
“I don’t want you to get away, Lena. I’m trying to keep you safe.” He takes a small step forward, as if approaching a frightened animal. He reaches his hand out and runs his fingers through my dirty matted hair. My body stiffens in response.
“Why are you keeping me here? I’ll do what you want, just please let me go.”
He snatches his hand away as if I’d bit him. “You can’t go! It’s not safe for you!” He starts moving backwards.
“Wait! I’m so hungry, please!” I don’t have a hope of escape if he refuses to feed me. I’m so weak already.
“I’ll be back,” he says, closing and locking the door behind him.
As disgusting and degrading as it is, I make my way over to the bucket in the corner to expel what little liquids I have left in my system. I suppose he could have really demeaned me by making me piss on myself in the bed. I cringe thinking about him emptying the bucket. Maybe I should be glad I haven’t had much to eat.
After relieving my bladder, I finally pace around the room, examining my enclosure. I’m a little less skittish and more curious about this place now that I’ve been here a couple days and he’s yet to hurt me.
The walls are all rough wood, poorly put together, yet sturdy enough to keep me in. There isn’t any electricity, no light switches or electrical sockets. The only means of escape are one medium sized window, boarded up, and the door, locked with a key from the outside. One of the floorboards is missing, revealing nothing but dirt beneath it. Trying to escape from this room is impossible, unless I can somehow figure out how to get the board off the window without him noticing. My best option seems to be the door, although finding a way out of the chain is next to impossible. Maybe I can bribe him.
Footsteps thud through the door, signaling his return, and I leap back onto my filthy mattress. Travis enters carrying a sandwich and a glass of water, instead of a bowl this time.
I scoot forward slowly, placing my feet on the dirty floor. Looking up at him, I stare into those once familiar green eyes. They’re different now. Harder and darker, they’re scary. He thrusts the food onto my lap, before taking a step back. Without leaving, he stands there, crossing his arms, watching me.
“Eat!” he barks out when I make no signs of moving. Abruptly, I shove half the sandwich into my mouth and chew before swallowing the dry bread roughly.
“Better?” I ask, although I know I shouldn’t provoke him. I allowed myself to be under his control once and I swore I’d never let it happen again. He’s not going to get that back from me here. I worked too hard to find myself. My compliance comes from trying to stay alive. He will not entrap me mentally again.
He nods in answer to my question but continues to stare at me. I eat again more slowly this time and of my own volition.
“Are you going to talk to me?” I ask softly. He’s not giving anything away, and I need to know why I’m here.
“What is there to talk about?” He’s unmoving, like a statue in the corner of my personal prison.
“Why am I here, Trav?” Please give me answe
rs, I mentally beg.
“To keep you safe.”
“The only thing I need to be safe from is you.”
“You don’t get it. You’re so damn blinded by him! I’m not here to hurt you. But I needed to separate you before you got hurt,” he says loudly, his voice booming throughout the tiny room.
“What the hell does that mean? Who are you talking about?”
“Eat. I’ll be back later. I’m going into town for supplies.” He slams the door behind him as he exits the room.
Suddenly, I’ve lost my appetite. Whatever his reason is for taking me, it’s something he truly believes is the right thing to do. And that scares me. Not that he might be right about my safety, but that he’s so committed to whatever delusional thoughts are plaguing his mind. Although I feel nauseated, I finish off the rest of my sandwich. I don’t know when he’ll allow me to eat again.
In the quiet of the dimming room, my mind plays tricks on me. The whisper of the wind, an animal scurrying by, I keep thinking I hear someone moving around outside.
The banging of a door startles me from my sleep. The room is dark, but I can see the door to my room is closed. It must have been the exterior door being shut that woke me. My ears strain but can’t hear a sound and can’t tell if Travis is coming or going.
My feet touch the cold floor as I leave the bed, putting my ear against the door to listen once more. Nothing. Silence greets me. My hand finds the handle and I jiggle the knob, even though I know it’s locked. I pull a little harder, testing the strength of the door. The knob is screwed in tightly, the door made of a sturdy wood. I won’t be able to break down this door with only my body.
Creeping silently along the rough wooden walls, I feel my way to the boarded window. Running my fingers around the edges, I feel for a loose spot in the seal. Ow, a rough splinter jams into the tip of my middle finger. I take the finger into my mouth, sucking to relieve the ache, the metallic taste of blood on my tongue. Damnit. The board is nailed in as sturdy as the door. I tiptoe back to the mattress, a little more downtrodden than I was a few minutes ago.