“Jess, I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have run out on you like I did.”
“No, you shouldn’t have.”
“Let me make it up to you. Dinner and a movie on Saturday?”
“Only if you come here. We need to talk this out. The sooner the better.”
“Deal. I’ll bring dinner, you pick the movie. How about six o’clock?”
“Sounds like a plan. Any preferences in movie?”
“None. The movie doesn’t matter, Jess. I think you know that.”
“I do. I’ll see you Saturday.”
“Good night, Jess.”
“Sweet dreams, Ash.”
Chapter Three
At six o’clock on the dot, she heard the rumble of Ash’s truck pulling into her driveway. Finally, he was here. The week had dragged on so slowly she thought tonight would never get there.
With one last look in the mirror, she headed to the door.
Pulling the door open, she said, “Hi! Nothing like being punctual. What did you do, wait down the road until almost six?”
“Something like that.” Ash looked a bit flushed, as if he wasn’t feeling so well.
“Are you okay?”
“Just a bit nervous. My manners have been quite lacking the past few times we’ve talked. I have a lot of apologizing to do.”
“I haven’t helped the situation much. Come on in. We can’t get anything settled standing in the doorway.”
He entered with several grocery bags dangling from his hands.
“So what’s for dinner?” She took a few of the bags from him, the ones he allowed her to take, anyway.
“I figured we could start with a small salad while we cooked a couple steaks and baked potatoes. Hope you don’t mind us fixing dinner here instead of ordering in or going out.”
“I think it’s a great idea. I have a new convection oven, and the top has a grill insert we can give a try.” She removed the items from the bags and put things away to make space for everything else he’d brought. The salad was a baby spring mix all ready for the other vegetables and toppings. He’d thought of everything, all the salad toppings she could think of sat on her counter. “I can’t believe you remembered I love a good ribeye.”
“Jess…”
“Yes.”
“Can we talk this out before we cook? I don’t really want any distractions, so we can get this over with and move on.”
“Sure. Let’s go in the living room where it’s more comfortable.” She led him to the couch.
Once he was seated, she walked back toward the kitchen. “Would you like something to drink? I’m going to make a quick glass of liquid courage. I have Jack, if you’re interested.”
“Sure, better make it a double, please.”
She could feel his eyes on her as she moved around the kitchen. Grabbing the glasses from the cupboard and opening the freezer, the sound of ice pinging against glass interrupted the silence that had settled over the room.
This explanation was going to be tough. She sucked in a breath gathering her courage before she took him his drink.
“Why didn’t you tell me you were moving here? I could have helped,” he said immediately.
“You didn’t sound enthusiastic about meeting, so I assumed asking for help would be encroaching on boundaries a bit.” She sent up a small prayer he wouldn’t see her hand trembling as she passed him his drink.
“I told you why I acted like an idiot. So why not tell me after I explained my reaction?”
He grabbed her wrist with his left hand, pulling her down onto his lap as she released the glass into his right hand.
“I already had the movers hired. Everything was organized and ready to go.”
The silence loomed heavy between them.
“Forget it, Ash, I didn’t do it to push you. I’ll keep to myself, anytime you want to talk, you know how to get ahold of me. Remember I love you, no matter what. The only thing holding you back is you—”
His voice boomed in the large room, cutting off her speech as his arm tightened around her waist, keeping her in place on his lap when she tried to get up. “Hold on a damn second, woman. I’m just trying to understand why you thought you needed to hide your move and why in the world you want to be with me.”
His grip around her waist loosened, but he didn’t completely release her. She was so tense he probably feared she’d snap if he moved. Leaning his forehead on her shoulder, he said, “Jess, please relax. You act as if we’re strangers. You know more about me than anyone, besides maybe my mother. You’ve told me yourself, I know more about you than any other man ever has.”
“Twelve years of my opinions and needs being ignored any time I brought them up taught me not to even bother opening my mouth about things I want. I guess I was afraid of another rejection, to be honest. To hear you weren’t interested when I would be in the same town as you would have been awful. You’re about as perfect as a man can get, at least for me.”
The smooth sound of Ash’s laugh warmed her chilled soul. She had wanted him for so long, she was afraid to hope her plan would come together.
“I stand behind my previous statement, you are great for a man’s ego.”
She grinned and shifted to face him as much as she could without straddling his lap. That might have been a little much at this point. She would let him lead this dance. “I’m not stoking anyone’s ego, just speaking the truth I see and feel.”
Waiting to see what he would do, she gazed at him as he gently palmed her cheek. His blue eyes sparkled as he smiled, tiny streaks of green radiated from the pupils. The color was quite fascinating.
The warmth of his touch had her leaning into his hand. Dreams of this moment came flooding back to her. None of them came close to the sensation the reality stirred in her. Desire filled her as they gazed at each other. Will he run or explore what we could have together?
“Jess, you’re thinking too hard. I can actually hear the gears in your brain turning. Stop thinking and just feel.”
Ash hesitated a moment before he pulled her in close, his gaze never leaving her face. When all she could see were his blue eyes, his lips grazed hers, almost too light to truly be called a touch.
She closed her eyes to savor the light brush of his lips against hers. As she sighed his lips slid across hers again. The action caused a flutter in her chest and small tremors of pleasure to course up and down her spine.
Her tension faded away as he deepened the kiss. Tilting his head, he took complete control of her mouth. The once light brushes of his lips became heavy, demanding, desperate caresses.
The air in the room carried a sudden charge of energy that ran across her skin. Her pulse raced and her breathing quickened to match the rhythm he’d set when he took command of body and soul.
She slipped her arms around his neck, running her hands up his neck to his hair. The ponytail holder was easy to pull out as she gripped the soft strands in her hand. The fantasy had finally become reality. His hair was as lush as she imagined when she ran her fingers through the long locks, letting them spill out around them. A moan rumbled through him as she grasped a handful near his scalp. Thinking she could get the upper hand, she pushed the kiss a little further. He had a different plan. He slid his tongue into her mouth. No hesitation, no sense of insecurity, it was a full-on, sensual attack on her senses.
The spicy scent of his cologne stirred her hunger while his tongue dancing with hers had her clenching her thighs together. God, I need him, need this.
Pulling back, she caught his bottom lip between her teeth and caressed it with a glide of her tongue. After a small suck she released him, leaned her forehead against his, asking, “Why did we wait so long?”
“Because I’m an insecure jackass.”
She pulled back to look him in the eye. “I can’t find an argument for that one at the moment.” She couldn’t completely hide the small laugh that worked its way out.
His hand flew up to cover his heart. “Ouch, so much
for being good for my ego. I don’t blame you, I screwed up, but you should have told me the whole truth. Seeing you the other night floored me. I should be beyond pissed at you for not telling me everything.”
Suddenly serious again, she clasped the hand over his heart. “I’m sorry. I didn’t want you to think I was pushing myself on you. The move, the new job, and your rejection when I first asked about meeting all left me struggling to find the right words to tell you.” Her eyes burned with forming tears.
Ash wrapped his arms around her, pulling her close. With her head resting on his shoulder, his scent and cologne once again overwhelmed her. He smelled fresh, like rain mixed with newly ground spices. The knot that had grown in her stomach since she moved loosened the more he rubbed her back and whispered several apologies for his behavior in her ear.
“You need to stop apologizing. We are both at fault here. I should have come right out and told you instead of testing the waters, so to speak.”
“I don’t think I gave you much choice with the way I’ve handled—or not handled—things in the past.”
Hugging him tightly, she said, “No more talk of the past. This is a new beginning, we need to grab the chance and run.” She gazed into his eyes. “Don’t look back or we’ll make the same mistakes we always have.”
Ash released a breath he’d apparently been holding, leaned down, and captured her lips in a slow, leisurely kiss, nothing like the one before. This one was more relaxed, enabling them to simply enjoy each other.
As her need to get closer rose, she found herself pressed up against his chest. If she could have become his second skin, she would have at that moment. The flex of his muscles as he moved against her sent her desire spiraling higher. She turned the tables this time by sliding her tongue into his mouth to circle his. The muscles in his back beneath her palms twitched.
Ash pulled back enough to break their connection and took a breath. “Damn, you make it hard for a guy to be a gentleman.”
“Who said I needed a gentleman right now? I asked you to be yourself.” She managed to find the strength to not beg him to fuck her hard and fast.
“My mother raised a gentleman, Jess. You have no idea how bad I want to throw you down and ravish you, but I was taught to treat women with respect.”
“Aw, the idea of letting you have your way with me sounded pretty good.” She got a smile out of him with an exaggerated pout. “But ravishing someone isn’t always disrespectful. Sometimes a woman wants a man to want her so much he can hardly control himself. But I understand and appreciate your honesty.” Somehow she was able to keep the disappointment from her voice.
His shoulders grew tight under her arms, and the tension in the room went up a bit. “How about watching one of those movies we’re always talking about?”
He slid her off his lap and stood.
Wow, I don’t make him that nervous, do I?
She watched him pace. Catching his attention, she motioned for him to come to her. “Come over here and sit down. You’re going to wear a hole in the floor. You’re more nervous than I am, and you have no reason to be.”
Slowly making his way across the room, he grinned at her. “Who says I’m nervous? Maybe I’m just anxious.”
“Nervous, anxious, in this context both mean the same thing. Now sit down and talk to me.” Grasping his hand, she pulled him down to sit beside her. “We’ve known each other for four years. We’ve talked about everything under the sun and moon. You know how I feel about you, you’ve known that for some time. Loosen up, darlin’. I’m not going to bite you…yet.” Winking at him, he finally laughed again, and she sensed the tension between them drop away.
“Talking on the phone, texting, and instant messaging online is a lot different than having you here in person. I’m not sure what to do.”
Still holding his hand, she gave his fingers a reassuring squeeze. “Do I need to get my laptop or phone to get you to talk to me tonight?” She couldn’t help but laugh again. Ash could easily keep her laughing so much her cheeks would hurt well before their conversation was over.
“No, smart ass, you don’t need your phone or laptop.” Gathering her into his arms, he hugged her tightly, whispering, “I’m glad you’re here.”
“Me too. Just relax and be yourself. Now we can actually do all the things we’ve talked about over the years. Go pick out a movie, then we can get started on our to-do list.”
Watching him walk back across the room to the entertainment center was an awesome sight. He was quite graceful for his size. She hadn’t expected someone six-foot two-inches tall, broad shouldered, and used to lots of manual labor to be so light on his feet.
“I feel like a damned teenager on his first date, not the fifty-year-old I am. How do you do that to me?” He blushed slightly as he carried back four movies to her.
“Well, you don’t appear too old to blush.” He tried to avoid looking her in the eye, but she wouldn’t let him. Laughing, she knew exactly how he felt. “You think you’re the only one who feels that way? I don’t remember feeling like this, even as a teenager. Hell, I can’t ever remember feeling like this.” Picking out The Shawshank Redemption, her favorite movie, she watched again as he walked back across the room.
As he stooped to put the DVD in the player, she enjoyed the view of his jeans pulling tight across his butt. Manual labor definitely does a body good. Grinning to herself, she didn’t notice him turn his head and look at her until he startled her by saying, “Woman, you need to stop looking at me like you’re going to eat me alive.”
Realizing he’d busted her ogling his ass, she blushed. “Oh my God, am I that obvious?” She couldn’t help but suck in a breath when the best-looking smile she’d ever seen spread across his face.
“Okay, let’s get dinner cooked so we can eat, and then watch the movie. How does that sound? Then maybe you’ll stop devouring me with your eyes.” His laugh was infectious as they headed for the kitchen.
Chapter Four
The grill worked like a charm. The steaks were cooked to perfection just like the potatoes. Thankfully, the convection oven worked as advertised. “You cook a mean steak, Mister James.”
“Well, thank you, Miss Thomas. Next time it’s your turn to cook. I’ll put in my request now for the fabulous lasagna you showed me a few months ago.”
She couldn’t believe he remembered the lasagna she had cooked some time ago. “I can do that. I think I have everything but the mozzarella, which I can get any time.”
They had the kitchen cleaned up and the dishwasher loaded, so they drifted back into the living room to the couch. “Let’s start the movie. We might be able to stay awake through to the end, could be tough after that meal though.” Luckily, she had purchased a sectional sofa with a lounger attached. There was enough room for them both to get comfortable side-by-side to watch the movie if he’d relaxed and wanted to get closer to her.
After she hit play, she swung her legs up on the lounger, offering him the spot next to her. She was a little surprised when he readily accepted. He slid up alongside her and fitted his body to hers, his shoulder creating a nice pillow for her head as the movie started.
They seemed to fit perfectly into each other. No one had ever matched her like Ash. He reached up, turned her face toward him, and said, “You’re thinking too hard again, just enjoy the moment and the movie.” He chuckled, giving her a quick, soft kiss on the nose.
“How do you know when I’m thinking about things?”
“I’ve told you I can hear the gears in your head turning. Seriously, your body language changes, and you feel different. I don’t know how to explain the difference any other way.”
“I think you know me too well.”
He chuckled and went back to watching the movie.
Shortly after he pulled her in closer, his breathing evened out. He’d apparently fallen asleep. She didn’t want to look, to move and possibly wake him. The moment was too right to mess up by disturbing him.
&n
bsp; He was keeping her warm and comfy wrapped up in his arms. A little while later her eyelids began to droop, but she stayed awake long enough to see the rooftop scene in the movie. Then the next thing she knew, Ash was whispering in her ear, “Wake up, sleepyhead. We missed the last half of the movie.”
She looked down to see their hands clasped with their fingers entwined. She pulled them to her chest before she asked, “What time is it?”
“Early, about four a.m.” His thumb brushed back and forth lazily over her inner wrist.
She never realized how sensitive that little patch of skin could be. Not wanting things to end yet, but knowing he probably wanted to leave, she said, “Guess we’ll have to set another date to finish the DVD.”
“Sorry, guess I relaxed a little too much. We could go back to sleep and watch the rest of the show in the daylight. Unless you’d rather I went home.”
“Are you kidding? I’ve been trying to find ways to keep you here.”
He pushed her to her back and looked her in the eye. “All you have to do is say stay.”
He’d pulled his hair back with the leather tie again. Reaching up with her free hand, she laid her palm against his stubble-roughened cheek and watched as his tongue slid slowly over his soft, full bottom lip. She looked up at his eyes before she could think any harder about his mouth and kissing him until they were both breathless. So overwhelmed by the emotion she saw swirling in Ash’s sparkling, bright blue eyes, she could only whisper, “Stay.”
A bone deep sigh rushed from his lips. She hadn’t noticed the tension in his arms until it disappeared on his release of breath. “Thank you, God.”
Her chuckle seemed loud in the quiet room. “Did you seriously think I would ask you to leave?” Not giving him time to respond to her question, she ran her thumb across his bottom lip before she kissed him. She gently brushed her lips over his then back again, playfully teasing a deeper kiss from him. He took control from her, nibbled at the corner of her mouth, and took advantage of her exhale, sliding his tongue into her mouth to glide along her own.
Face to Face Page 3